On Gaymers and Cons

[Shikua]

Implying that hermaphrodites are the only other sex.

A hermaphrodite is an organism that has reproductive organs normally associated with both the male and the female of the species.

Also ignoring intersexed individuals.[/quote"

I ignored nothing of the sort: Intersexed people are also not a seperate gender. Intersexed individuals are members of the previous two genders usually displaying some form of genital ambiguity (but sometimes just a chromosonal error like Klinefelter syndrome that does not manifest until puberty).

Like i said, there are only two biological genders.

I know what a hermaphrodite is. You're not making your point any stronger.
How do you define physical/biological sex then? Genital ambiguity is, in essence a separate sex. If you really want to get technical, it's a separate morph of the "traditional" sexes of XX-female and XY-male. Even more so with chromosomal differentiation.

Also, if you want to be taken as someone who knows what they're talking about, it's usually wise to use proper terminology. Calling sex "gender" is like calling cout "coot". You just look like you have no clue what you're talking about.

 

[101flyboy]

Matthew, please stop talking for hermaphroditism, stop talking for gay people, stop talking for lesbians, stop talking on the behalf of things you do not get. You are so unbelievable. What is you deal? You are so arrogant.

 

[101flyboy]

As sad as that is, any word could be a trigger. If someone explicitly asks me not to use it then sure, but I'm not going to stop saying it just because there's an off chance someone around me might remember bad memories.

Translation: Who cares about gay people.

BTW, ****** is a word that a lot of gay men and straight allies do in fact use. Here's the thing...............we're actually in the know. We know when to use it, how to use it, where to use it and we don't use it as a means to attack people in an aggressive manner. You are not in the know. Let's make that clear. The word has sting when some random guy, who arrogantly thinks he has the right to tell gay people how to feel about a word that is in fact used against them and has been for centuries, uses it and then when called out on it, keeps using it, and gives a middle finger to people asking you POLITELY to not use it.

That is showing a lack of respect towards the word. And that is intentionally being ABRASIVE and DEFIANT. You are being defiant. At the end of the day, ****** is our word, it isn't yours. You do not get to define it. The fact you think you do is actually not my problem, it's your problem, because it makes you look like a total heel. That's on you. I know in my world, people are usually pretty careful with that word because they don't want to be seen as ignorant, but I guess you don't care.

BTW, Louis CK uses the word IRONICALLY and uses it understanding and respecting the power of the word. You are not. One guy is someone who has consistently proven his pro-gay status. You have not. You are out of order.

 

[Shikua]

I know what a hermaphrodite is.

No you didn't.

Genital ambiguity is, in essence a separate sex.

No it isn't... Because humans aren't hermaphoditic... Which is why i know you don't know what hermaphodite means. Had you, you'd have not made that argument. Its the equiviliant of you saying you know what blue is & then saying "blue + three equals seven." One cleraly does not know what blue is if one is misusing it in such a fashion.

Humans are not hermaphroditic; variance in the genes or during gestation does not equal a third gender, because for humans to have a third gender it would have to be hermaphroditic (possessing both functional testes & ovaries), which is not a current feature of the animal species know as humans.

There are two biological genders in humans & thats it.

To be fair there has been a lot of bullshit spoken on this topic over the years, due in no small part to idol medical speculation from people who should know better.

Hmm? What was that science? Oh, there are other animals with more than 2 standard sexual morphs? What?! Some of them aren't hermaphrodites, but are variations of male or female? You don't say! It's almost like humans can be born that way! Who'd have thought?

 

[Shikua]

Oh, there are other animals with more than 2 standard sexual morphs? What?! Some of them aren't hermaphrodites, but are variations of male or female?

No there isn't. Thats the point. Name me one species of creature that has more then 2 genders in which the third gender is not a true hermaphrodite.

You don't say! It's almost like humans can be born that way! Who'd have thought?

But humans can't be born that way. Humans are not true Hermaphrodites. We are incapable of being born with both sets of functioning genitalia.

Well, most species don't have genders. Gender is a social construct. But sexes, well, if we're talking about sexual morphs, which is what I was talking about, there are plenty. White-throated sparrows, for instance, have 2 male morphs, that vary in appearance. They also exhibit different sexual strategies. You know, kind of like how humans sometimes have different genital formations. You know, intersexed folks. That thing that's a different sexual morph.

That thing that is totally separated from gender. Yeah. So I'm gonna finish this hear, because I can tell I won't sway how you think. It doesn't make you any less wrong, but I'm not so high and mighty as to think I can change every bigoted opinion some people have.

 

[Sexual Harassment Panda]

As sad as that is, any word could be a trigger. If someone explicitly asks me not to use it then sure, but I'm not going to stop saying it just because there's an off chance someone around me might remember bad memories.

Translation: Who cares about gay people.

BTW, ****** is a word that a lot of gay men and straight allies do in fact use. Here's the thing...............we're actually in the know. We know when to use it, how to use it, where to use it and we don't use it as a means to attack people in an aggressive manner. You are not in the know. Let's make that clear. The word has sting when some random guy, who arrogantly thinks he has the right to tell gay people how to feel about a word that is in fact used against them and has been for centuries, uses it and then when called out on it, keeps using it, and gives a middle finger to people asking you POLITELY to not use it.

That is showing a lack of respect towards the word. And that is intentionally being ABRASIVE and DEFIANT. You are being defiant. At the end of the day, ****** is our word, it isn't yours. You do not get to define it. The fact you think you do is actually not my problem, it's your problem, because it makes you look like a total heel. That's on you. I know in my world, people are usually pretty careful with that word because they don't want to be seen as ignorant, but I guess you don't care.

BTW, Louis CK uses the word IRONICALLY and uses it understanding and respecting the power of the word. You are not. One guy is someone who has consistently proven his pro-gay status. You have not. You are out of order.

Translation: All of my ideas are the right ideas.

The problem with being this sanctimonious is that people are going to want to defy you regardless of whether you're making sense or not. Because... "fuck you, who are you?" That's why.

It's problematic telling him his mind too. On one hand you're saying that if irony is intended, it's cool, but then presume to tell some perfect-stranger that-that isn't how he intends it when he does use it. Which is... not really fair.

Also... in what world is "******" your word? That sounds like a thing people might say politically, but you gotta know that in reality it doesn't mean a damn thing.

This is all so boring.

 

[101flyboy]

As sad as that is, any word could be a trigger. If someone explicitly asks me not to use it then sure, but I'm not going to stop saying it just because there's an off chance someone around me might remember bad memories.

Translation: Who cares about gay people.

BTW, ****** is a word that a lot of gay men and straight allies do in fact use. Here's the thing...............we're actually in the know. We know when to use it, how to use it, where to use it and we don't use it as a means to attack people in an aggressive manner. You are not in the know. Let's make that clear. The word has sting when some random guy, who arrogantly thinks he has the right to tell gay people how to feel about a word that is in fact used against them and has been for centuries, uses it and then when called out on it, keeps using it, and gives a middle finger to people asking you POLITELY to not use it.

That is showing a lack of respect towards the word. And that is intentionally being ABRASIVE and DEFIANT. You are being defiant. At the end of the day, ****** is our word, it isn't yours. You do not get to define it. The fact you think you do is actually not my problem, it's your problem, because it makes you look like a total heel. That's on you. I know in my world, people are usually pretty careful with that word because they don't want to be seen as ignorant, but I guess you don't care.

BTW, Louis CK uses the word IRONICALLY and uses it understanding and respecting the power of the word. You are not. One guy is someone who has consistently proven his pro-gay status. You have not. You are out of order.

Translation: All of my ideas are the right ideas.

The problem with being this sanctimonious is that people are going to want to defy you regardless of whether you're making sense or not. Because... "fuck you, who are you?" That's why.

It's problematic telling him his mind too. On one hand you're saying that if irony is intended, it's cool, but then presume to tell some perfect-stranger that-that isn't how he intends it when he does use it. Which is... not really fair.

Also... in what world is "******" your word? That sounds like a thing people might say politically, but you gotta know that in reality it doesn't mean a damn thing.

This is all so boring.

That's sort of the problem regardless. It's already that situation for, maybe not a majority here, but definitely some. And a large portion of gamers in general, and society in general. It's already a fuck you situation. A IDGAF, get over yourself fags, situation. So speaking out against that isn't means to be sanctimonious. I apologize for coming off that way, coming off strong. With that said, we've past the time where intentional defiance is going to be met with smiles. We've past that point. Intentional defiance in itself is a fuck you, sanctimonious action. It's a middle finger slung in your face.

I'm different than many gays/straight allies. I just say fuck you too and move on. I agree that's not the best way to create understanding but at some point I get tired with talking to someone who isn't willing to listen or take in what is being said to them.

Honestly, ****** is just like **** and ****** in my eyes. You have to be in the know to use it. If you're a stranger, I don't know you, I don't know your intent and I've not warmed up with you then, for me, using ****** and using a "slur word" in general makes me think you really have no filter. You have no respect for your surroundings or how others may feel about the word. What's not fair is that not being respected. Yes, that person may not at all have meant to offend but that's the point. You shouldn't put yourself in such a situation to begin with. For me it's a responsibility and respect issue. Have the responsibility to stand by what you say, why you said it and realize that a lot of people aren't going to be cool with some unknown stranger using ****** without knowing what you're about. At the end of the day the word is abused and hence people have the right to be on guard about it.

In reality it doesn't mean much but what it does mean is that using the word, at least in my parts, in just any social setting without feeling it out and without knowing if everyone you're associating with will take it in the right way, will at least get you serious dirty looks, and probable social isolation. That's how me and my friends are. We don't associate with people who simply have no filter because we see it as a lack of respect for others AND themselves. At least I do. It's also immature when you can simply use a different word to get your point across.

It's our word because it's the word that has been used against us, and in many cases as empowerment for us, for centuries. Not 10 years, not 100 years, centuries. So yes, it's a word that is close to us, and cuts us in many different ways, but cuts us all the same way. Some gays use it proudly, some gays never do. Same straight allies use it jokingly, some are scared to use it or hear it. But at the end of the day, the word means something to us, and that should be respected.

 

[101flyboy]

It's not that all of my, or the non-hetero non-cisgender communities thoughts are the only right thoughts, but more like, we're the ones who know how we feel about these things more than your average straight person. So if you're wanting to ask questions and observe, that's fine. You may have presumptions or curiosities that we'll answer, and we'll be closer after the fact. If you're wanting to inject your two cents and dictate to us how we're supposed to feel or make it all about you, that's a different thing, and were not going to be OK with that.

 

[secretsantaone]

As sad as that is, any word could be a trigger. If someone explicitly asks me not to use it then sure, but I'm not going to stop saying it just because there's an off chance someone around me might remember bad memories.

Translation: Who cares about gay people.

BTW, ****** is a word that a lot of gay men and straight allies do in fact use. Here's the thing...............we're actually in the know. We know when to use it, how to use it, where to use it and we don't use it as a means to attack people in an aggressive manner. You are not in the know. Let's make that clear. The word has sting when some random guy, who arrogantly thinks he has the right to tell gay people how to feel about a word that is in fact used against them and has been for centuries, uses it and then when called out on it, keeps using it, and gives a middle finger to people asking you POLITELY to not use it.

That is showing a lack of respect towards the word. And that is intentionally being ABRASIVE and DEFIANT. You are being defiant. At the end of the day, ****** is our word, it isn't yours. You do not get to define it. The fact you think you do is actually not my problem, it's your problem, because it makes you look like a total heel. That's on you. I know in my world, people are usually pretty careful with that word because they don't want to be seen as ignorant, but I guess you don't care.

BTW, Louis CK uses the word IRONICALLY and uses it understanding and respecting the power of the word. You are not. One guy is someone who has consistently proven his pro-gay status. You have not. You are out of order.

1. Words don't 'belong' to anyone.
2. I didn't tell anyone how to feel.
3. Louis CK doesn't use it ironically, he uses it in a different sense.
4. I didn't call anyone a ******.
5. Stop being a ******.

 

[101flyboy]

1. Words don't 'belong' to anyone.
2. I didn't tell anyone how to feel.
3. Louis CK doesn't use it ironically, he uses it in a different sense.
4. I didn't call anyone a ******.
5. Stop being a ******.

1. In the real world, there are certain words have a connection to individual groups. That's the REAL world. I know, I get it. You're in a privileged position, you don't understand, and you lack empathy and feeling. That's your own problems you'll have to deal with but in the meantime, you'll need to get over yourself and not think you can do whatever you want without consequence.

2. Yes, you have, you said people should be offended by ****** because it's no longer a gay slur in most circumstances. At the very least, stick by your words. If you're going for the insensitive IDGAF route, stand by it.

3. Maybe you should actually, you know, hear it from the man, or actually read recent interviews he's had where he details his usage of the word. He actually respects the word, it's history and it's power, and respects the gay community. You don't. Thus, most are OK with him using the word, and not people like you. Pretty simple.

4. I didn't say you did.

5. Yet now you have.

It's like you enjoy being completely dense and antagonizing. You must be so proud of yourself and your upstanding character.

 

[Nemu]

What exactly would you have at a gay gamer convention that would be different to any other gamer convention or is it just got a gaudy stereotypical colour palate and gives you the comfortable feeling that everyone around you can relate because not only are they gamers but they are also gay?

How about things that aren't squared directly at 18-24 year old males? Booth Babes, for one. How many scantily-clad women would get a gay man's heart racing?

Booth dudes. I'm sure someone could get behind that...*wink* *wink*

Seriously... there are gay women at these things who would enjoy booth babes... not that there can't be both but its a bit odd that people would say no one would care about the presence of booth babes at a gay gamer convention.

Lesbians exist too.

Thankfully, they are in my gay-friendly guilds.


Seriously, tho. The fact that people don't understand why gay-cons exist is exactly why they need to. Until straight people do the same thing they tell gay folks to do--"get over it"-- there is going to be a need. Folks are never going to understand situations like this until they, themselves, are in it, be it having a sibling come out, or a best friend, and seeing that person deal with hatred from someone else.


Thank god for gay-friendly guilds and websites (AND conventions), because within those areas, we don't have to continuously answer questions or deal with callous phrases being tossed around. Games are supposed to be fun, and an escape, after all.

 

[101flyboy]

What's funny is how some straight people not really in the know (aka non-ally straights) have made statements like "what do games have to do with sexuality", or "why make everything about your sexuality", get shown example after example of games promoted with an eye on the straight male crowd, and then still not realize that games are often sexualized and gaming culture is clearly sexualized, all tailored towards straight men. Of course, basic human interaction is too, and it's disingenuous to believe otherwise. It's little things like that which grate on you, because it's so obvious yet many are so blind. Sexuality plays a MAJOR part in all of our lives and social identities, and especially if you're non-heterosexual. I find it amusing they get upset about segregation when they're allowed to go to Gaymercon, and need no permission, and aren't being patronized, because we welcome them to join. And are allowed to associate with the gay community, and need no permission, and we welcome them to do so. It's almost cute. Like, they don't want us to leave them. They don't want to believe we hate them. They want us to be part of their world, but don't see how their world is cold for us. I actually think a lot of every-day straight people take gay rights more harshly, are more sensitive to it, than many gay people and they catch feelings quicker. They wonder why gay is an issue still, or why gay people make it an issue, without realizing while they may not have an issue, a major portion of people still do. They don't really know what's truly going on so they make ignorant statements out of..........ignorance, but out of love too. So I have to try not to be offended because most people here are truly accepting and respectful.

I just want to shake these kind-but-misguided folk and say: We can fight the bullshit in your world (and trust me, I think most of us here are doing that, we're not hiding in fear from the hate) while at the same time having our own world to decompress, and not deal with bullshit for a while! Every second of every day doesn't need to be crusader mode. Everyone needs to relax sometime. And we want you to come with because we value you!

 

[secretsantaone]

1. Words don't 'belong' to anyone.
2. I didn't tell anyone how to feel.
3. Louis CK doesn't use it ironically, he uses it in a different sense.
4. I didn't call anyone a ******.
5. Stop being a ******.

1. In the real world, there are certain words have a connection to individual groups. That's the REAL world. I know, I get it. You're in a privileged position, you don't understand, and you lack empathy and feeling. That's your own problems you'll have to deal with but in the meantime, you'll need to get over yourself and not think you can do whatever you want without consequence.

2. Yes, you have, you said people should be offended by ****** because it's no longer a gay slur in most circumstances. At the very least, stick by your words. If you're going for the insensitive IDGAF route, stand by it.

3. Maybe you should actually, you know, hear it from the man, or actually read recent interviews he's had where he details his usage of the word. He actually respects the word, it's history and it's power, and respects the gay community. You don't. Thus, most are OK with him using the word, and not people like you. Pretty simple.

4. I didn't say you did.

5. Yet now you have.

It's like you enjoy being completely dense and antagonizing. You must be so proud of yourself and your upstanding character.

1. Connections do not imply ownership. Especially when the word has evolved so much already. The word ****** doesn't belong to a bundle of sticks or Swedish people just because it can be connected to them. Definitions are decided by majority, not minority.

2. I never said they should or should not be offended. I'm just saying people may use the word purely because it's offensive rather than because of overt homosexuality. Sorry if this doesn't fit in with your persecution complex.

3. Different sense, different meaning. That's not irony.

4. Then what's the fucking problem?

5. Because you were being a ******. Also DATS DA JOKE.

 

[Sexual Harassment Panda]

Snip

It's not that all of my, or the non-hetero non-cisgender communities thoughts are the only right thoughts, but more like, we're the ones who know how we feel about these things more than your average straight person. So if you're wanting to ask questions and observe, that's fine. You may have presumptions or curiosities that we'll answer, and we'll be closer after the fact. If you're wanting to inject your two cents and dictate to us how we're supposed to feel or make it all about you, that's a different thing, and were not going to be OK with that.

Well you're better off assuming the best in people to start with, or else they might well end up resenting you regardless of word-politics. If you actually want to instigate change in someone, surely it's better to leave them plenty of room to retreat? I think this is one of those honey trumping vinegar situations. Because you're not just putting an idea out there, you're also acting as an ambassador for it.

You can go full-throttle at people if that's your shtick, but I bet people are more often than not walking away thinking that you're the asshole, rather than thinking about their own behaviour. It's an easy out. Whereas something like "Hey, man. I know you don't want to hurt anyone, but your choice of words isn't going down well" allows some room to retreat, and would probably leave them respecting you more too. Which if you want them to try to see things your way... is desirable.

 

[101flyboy]

Snip

It's not that all of my, or the non-hetero non-cisgender communities thoughts are the only right thoughts, but more like, we're the ones who know how we feel about these things more than your average straight person. So if you're wanting to ask questions and observe, that's fine. You may have presumptions or curiosities that we'll answer, and we'll be closer after the fact. If you're wanting to inject your two cents and dictate to us how we're supposed to feel or make it all about you, that's a different thing, and were not going to be OK with that.

Well you're better off assuming the best in people to start with, or else they might well end up resenting you regardless of word-politics. If you actually want to instigate change in someone, surely it's better to leave them plenty of room to retreat? I think this is one of those honey trumping vinegar situations. Because you're not just putting an idea out there, you're also acting as an ambassador for it.

You can go full-throttle at people if that's your shtick, but I bet people are more often than not walking away thinking that you're the asshole, rather than thinking about their own behaviour. It's an easy out. Whereas something like "Hey, man. I know you don't want to hurt anyone, but your choice of words isn't going down well" allows some room to retreat, and would probably leave them respecting you more too. Which if you want them to try to see things your way... is desirable.

Your right. I agree with you. I'm not the best advocate. Definitely not. I'm blunt. I'm more of a "put everything on the table" type. I throw everything on the table and let people decide where they stand. Which is not the best strategy when it comes to discussions where you're trying to educate someone because they'll feel pressured. At the same time, it will make people listen. However, I'm not soft enough to be an advocate. I'm a little too jaded. I'm at the point in my life where I have expectations of people and if they don't meet them then it's like, oh well.

I only speak for myself in debates. I don't speak for the community. I do know how the community tends to think on these issues since I'm in the LGBTQ community. But ultimately it's a mix of listening to them, and knowing what's in my heart. I always listen to what the other party has to say, and I don't make assumptions. I just get tired after a while of the same BS that I don't think should be continuing in 2013. That's something I need to work on, because I know that some people just don't understand or have habits they've developed and don't intent to be hateful. Respecting an individual's views and how they came to them. If a person is open to change I'm all for educating them and enlightening them.

 

[101flyboy]

1. Words don't 'belong' to anyone.
2. I didn't tell anyone how to feel.
3. Louis CK doesn't use it ironically, he uses it in a different sense.
4. I didn't call anyone a ******.
5. Stop being a ******.

1. In the real world, there are certain words have a connection to individual groups. That's the REAL world. I know, I get it. You're in a privileged position, you don't understand, and you lack empathy and feeling. That's your own problems you'll have to deal with but in the meantime, you'll need to get over yourself and not think you can do whatever you want without consequence.

2. Yes, you have, you said people should be offended by ****** because it's no longer a gay slur in most circumstances. At the very least, stick by your words. If you're going for the insensitive IDGAF route, stand by it.

3. Maybe you should actually, you know, hear it from the man, or actually read recent interviews he's had where he details his usage of the word. He actually respects the word, it's history and it's power, and respects the gay community. You don't. Thus, most are OK with him using the word, and not people like you. Pretty simple.

4. I didn't say you did.

5. Yet now you have.

It's like you enjoy being completely dense and antagonizing. You must be so proud of yourself and your upstanding character.

1. Connections do not imply ownership. Especially when the word has evolved so much already. The word ****** doesn't belong to a bundle of sticks or Swedish people just because it can be connected to them. Definitions are decided by majority, not minority.

2. I never said they should or should not be offended. I'm just saying people may use the word purely because it's offensive rather than because of overt homosexuality. Sorry if this doesn't fit in with your persecution complex.

3. Different sense, different meaning. That's not irony.

4. Then what's the fucking problem?

5. Because you were being a ******. Also DATS DA JOKE.

1. Ownership? No. Does it mean you should, at the very least, understand WHY people are sensitive towards the word, and why ****** cuts deep for many, gay and straight? Yes. That's a respect issue. You either have respect for the word and respect for those who have a legitimate reason to be sensitive towards the word or you do not.

2. That's totally true. There is a reason why the word is offensive AND has been connected to homosexuality in history. Because homosexuality is considered offensive. That's the connection that gay people feel daily when the word is used to put someone down. Not when it's used in jest, or as a joke with friends.

3. I'll put it pretty simple: Louis CK believes that being gay is not at all a bad thing. He uses the word ****** as a way to display that people get offended by the word ******, although being a ****** aka gay isn't a negative thing, however due to homophobia people TAKE it offensively. He's manipulating persons' view on both the word and homosexuality.

4/5. I have no problem outside of you trying to make jokes yet failing miserably. Keep it to the comedians.

 

[secretsantaone]

1. Words don't 'belong' to anyone.
2. I didn't tell anyone how to feel.
3. Louis CK doesn't use it ironically, he uses it in a different sense.
4. I didn't call anyone a ******.
5. Stop being a ******.

1. In the real world, there are certain words have a connection to individual groups. That's the REAL world. I know, I get it. You're in a privileged position, you don't understand, and you lack empathy and feeling. That's your own problems you'll have to deal with but in the meantime, you'll need to get over yourself and not think you can do whatever you want without consequence.

2. Yes, you have, you said people should be offended by ****** because it's no longer a gay slur in most circumstances. At the very least, stick by your words. If you're going for the insensitive IDGAF route, stand by it.

3. Maybe you should actually, you know, hear it from the man, or actually read recent interviews he's had where he details his usage of the word. He actually respects the word, it's history and it's power, and respects the gay community. You don't. Thus, most are OK with him using the word, and not people like you. Pretty simple.

4. I didn't say you did.

5. Yet now you have.

It's like you enjoy being completely dense and antagonizing. You must be so proud of yourself and your upstanding character.

1. Connections do not imply ownership. Especially when the word has evolved so much already. The word ****** doesn't belong to a bundle of sticks or Swedish people just because it can be connected to them. Definitions are decided by majority, not minority.

2. I never said they should or should not be offended. I'm just saying people may use the word purely because it's offensive rather than because of overt homosexuality. Sorry if this doesn't fit in with your persecution complex.

3. Different sense, different meaning. That's not irony.

4. Then what's the fucking problem?

5. Because you were being a ******. Also DATS DA JOKE.

1. Ownership? No. Does it mean you should, at the very least, understand WHY people are sensitive towards the word, and why ****** cuts deep for many, gay and straight? Yes. That's a respect issue. You either have respect for the word and respect for those who have a legitimate reason to be sensitive towards the word or you do not.

2. That's totally true. There is a reason why the word is offensive AND has been connected to homosexuality in history. Because homosexuality is considered offensive. That's the connection that gay people feel daily when the word is used to put someone down. Not when it's used in jest, or as a joke with friends.

3. I'll put it pretty simple: Louis CK believes that being gay is not at all a bad thing. He uses the word ****** as a way to display that people get offended by the word ******, although being a ****** aka gay isn't a negative thing, however due to homophobia people TAKE it offensively. He's manipulating persons' view on both the word and homosexuality.

4/5. I have no problem outside of you trying to make jokes yet failing miserably. Keep it to the comedians.

1. Of course I understand why gay people are sensitive about the word ******, as it can be used ass a slur to refer to them. However, I'm not going to stop using a word because a group of people can take it out of context and get offended by it.

2. Deal with it. Though the origins come from gay=bad and that's where the negative connotations derive, it can be used as a general put down without referring to gay people any more. Same theory with "bastard".

3. Louis CK originally never thought the word ****** referred to gay people at all, that was the point. He says that ****** has two distinct meanings in two different contexts.

4/5. Then why are you bitching?

 

[Sexual Harassment Panda]

Snip

It's not that all of my, or the non-hetero non-cisgender communities thoughts are the only right thoughts, but more like, we're the ones who know how we feel about these things more than your average straight person. So if you're wanting to ask questions and observe, that's fine. You may have presumptions or curiosities that we'll answer, and we'll be closer after the fact. If you're wanting to inject your two cents and dictate to us how we're supposed to feel or make it all about you, that's a different thing, and were not going to be OK with that.

Well you're better off assuming the best in people to start with, or else they might well end up resenting you regardless of word-politics. If you actually want to instigate change in someone, surely it's better to leave them plenty of room to retreat? I think this is one of those honey trumping vinegar situations. Because you're not just putting an idea out there, you're also acting as an ambassador for it.

You can go full-throttle at people if that's your shtick, but I bet people are more often than not walking away thinking that you're the asshole, rather than thinking about their own behaviour. It's an easy out. Whereas something like "Hey, man. I know you don't want to hurt anyone, but your choice of words isn't going down well" allows some room to retreat, and would probably leave them respecting you more too. Which if you want them to try to see things your way... is desirable.

Your right. I agree with you. I'm not the best advocate. Definitely not. I'm blunt. I'm more of a "put everything on the table" type. I throw everything on the table and let people decide where they stand. Which is not the best strategy when it comes to discussions where you're trying to educate someone because they'll feel pressured. At the same time, it will make people listen. However, I'm not soft enough to be an advocate. I'm a little too jaded. I'm at the point in my life where I have expectations of people and if they don't meet them then it's like, oh well.

I only speak for myself in debates. I don't speak for the community. I do know how the community tends to think on these issues since I'm in the LGBTQ community. But ultimately it's a mix of listening to them, and knowing what's in my heart. I always listen to what the other party has to say, and I don't make assumptions. I just get tired after a while of the same BS that I don't think should be continuing in 2013. That's something I need to work on, because I know that some people just don't understand or have habits they've developed and don't intent to be hateful. Respecting an individual's views and how they came to them. If a person is open to change I'm all for educating them and enlightening them.

I don't think it's really about being "soft" so much as it's about having tact... which is sorta what you're asking to get from other people, when you think about it.

It being 2013 is irrelevent. Think of all the bullshit, tyranny and mass-delusions of the last 100 years and then ask yourself if it would make any kind of sense if we had just dropped all of that over night. Very little time has passed really.