On Gaymers and Cons

[UniversalRonin]

Upon hearing this I did myself wonder why there would be an event specifically for homosexuals, when I don't see games having much to do with sexual identity for the most part.

Exactly. How does sexuality affect behavior at a gaming convention?

Have you spent 8 seconds or more on Xbox Live? There is your answer

As much as I love the gaming community, there is a very vocal & persistent subsection of our community that is extremely homophobic. The vast majority of us are not, but we all know it's there

If they wanna start a game convention where people aren't yelling "******" every other moment, have at it. I can certainly see why

Is that the same subsection that plays COD, BF3 and other such titles?

 

[Sepko]

Liked the comic, especially the guy without pants and it makes a valid point.

Bit sad at the whole "if you're a white and straight teenager then you wouldn't understand" vibe of the description though. That's just a self-fulfilling prophecy, if you go in expecting others to misunderstand then chances are pretty high that that's how things will end up.

Issues like this are never solved by even more alienation, it's vital to seek common ground from which to build understanding. Going in with the expectation that there's no such common ground because the opposite side is of a specific race, sexual orientation, age etc. is anathema to tolerance and understanding.

It's not like it's gonna stop us going to other cons just because we've got the gay one now. The gay one is an option, that's all, a place where we can be a bit more comfortable an open if we want. It's not segregation if we have a choice to go to where we wanna go.

Captcha: rack your brains
No joke.

 

[Draconalis]

My buddy is the one designing all the logos for gaymercon... so if you don't like them, be sure to tell me so I can tell him "I told you so".

 

[OfficialJab]

Thing is, you don't get to decide how another person is supposed to interpret the words you use. If you say 'fa*' in front of a gay person and they feel upset about it, "I didn't mean 'gay'" is not a very good excuse.

I absolutely appreciate that you don't use it in front of strangers, but it's not hard to imagine that plenty of people will and have, even if they didn't mean 'gay'. To me, I find it pretty odd that some people think they can just detatch the word from its derogatory meaning with no issue whatsoever, obviously you know how the word has been widely used to put down gay people, so why not just use something else that doesn't have that context around it?

I'm not trying to, that's why I don't use it in a public presence, or anything other than reactively, since it's ingrained into many people's (particularly internet-users) vernacular now. I'm not defending the use of it "in front of a gay person", with any excuse. Reiterating, my only point was that it doesn't represent latent homophobia.

Nobody's really consciously detached it from its original meaning, it's just gradually made its way to being used to describe something that isn't its original meaning. Why doesn't everybody just use a different word instead? Why indeed. However, it becomes instinctive for people who hear it all the time in that context, just like any other word. It doesn't mean that those people are homophobic. I'm certainly not.

But seriously... why DO chicks want their own bathroom? What do they have to hide?

Just trust them. You want them to have their own bathroom.

 

[Peithelo]

-DELETED-

 

[bunji]

Well I came here to ask those excact questions, since i dont think theyre ignorant at all, in fact i think they are quite important. I also dont like the double standard here, that its okay for people of a special sexual orientation to exclude people from an event, as long as they arent straight.

 

[Alcaste]

Well I came here to ask those excact questions, since i dont think theyre ignorant at all, in fact i think they are quite important. I also dont like the double standard here, that its okay for people of a special sexual orientation to exclude people from an event, as long as they arent straight.

Nobody's excluding anything. How hard is that to grasp? If you're straight you can still attend these events.

 

[hentropy]

But seriously... why DO chicks want their own bathroom? What do they have to hide?

Honestly I am glad they have their own bathrooms, imagine the queues us guys had to endure at sightseeing places and events?

So what you're saying is that gender separation tends to benefit one benefit or the other?

In any case, this doesn't really seem like discrimination or "self-segregation" or whatever because they're not actually turning away straight people, issuing tests on musical theater/monster trucks on the way in or issuing tickle attacks/beat downs on the straight menace intruders.

I can't think of a conceivable way it could be harmful and anything it will help them organize and have fun in an environment where they won't be judged or hindered by anyone. Most cons are industry events and I doubt they would be willing to hold panels and such discussing topics regarding homosexuality, at least there's been no such discussion at the few gaming cons I've gone to. Anime cons sort of have to be gay friendly by default.

 

[RTR]

Anyone else remembered Apocalypse Lane?

 

[Erttheking]

Do be perfectly fair I have to ask that question too. I mean, why can't we all go to the same con? I mean, it's not like I would have a problem with a gay person at the same con as me, Hell, one of the people in my circle of nerd friends is OPENLY GAY! And another is bi.

 

[Sepko]

Do be perfectly fair I have to ask that question too. I mean, why can't we all go to the same con? I mean, it's not like I would have a problem with a gay person at the same con as me, Hell, one of the people in my circle of nerd friends is OPENLY GAY! And another is bi.

We can all go to the same cons. We'll keep going to the cons we've been going to for years and you can come to our new one that's for us because you're totes supportive of LGBT folk, right?

 

[OniaPL]

Umm... I actually don't understand why the LGBT -community would need their own gaming convention. There isn't anything dickish about it though, and I don't see why that particular question even would be dickish.

I don't think it's dickish, just ignorant. 'Ignorant' here not being rude, just what it means. There's no way that you can personally understand their situation, hence you can't understand some of the things they say or do.

Understand what situation? That people treat them in a shitty way at times?
So the solution to that is to separate the two groups altogether? That's just pointless.


Or is it that the regular gaming cons don't offer enough games that "gaymers" like?
Why not just make another con then instead of aiming it "gaymers" specifically?

I mean, you still haven't explained the issue to which the gaymercon is a solution to. You can't just say "you just don't understand", at least in a proper discussion you can't.

Read the epilogue text underneath the comic and then rethink your statements.
Here, I even found the relevant bit for you: "They ask why a minority pushing for acceptance and integration would "segregate" themselves. They're innocent questions, but they come from minds that, quite often, don't comprehend that being able to "fit in" (hoho) pretty much anywhere is one of the numerous luxuries that come with being straight. Indeed, feeling like you fit in is pretty much the entire point of going to a con isn't it?"

So because the LGBT community doesn't feel comfortable enough with who they are to be able to withstand odd looks from dickheads they create cons where they can get the acceptance they need?

Why make it a gaming event then? If you need pats on the back and loving acceptance then just make a therapy group or something.

 

[Boris Goodenough]

Honestly I am glad they have their own bathrooms, imagine the queues us guys had to endure at sightseeing places and events?

So what you're saying is that gender separation tends to benefit one benefit or the other?

[/quote]
In case of gender separated bathrooms in busy areas where there are just as many female and male stalls, there is a clear benefit for guys as they tend to be faster than girls on the loo so the queues move along faster.

If we are to have gender separated bathrooms we need to increase the amount of stalls for women.

 

[CyborgGinger]

It's hardly "segregation" - it's an option. Gay people can attend any con they like, straight people can attend GaymerCon if they like. We should deny people the option to go somewhere that they can feel comfortable because...why, exactly?

I'm not arguing against GaymerCon, people are free to do as they please and market forces will determine the success/failure of the event, just as any other. And, of course, I don't begrudge or deny anyone a specifically tailored event if they feel they don't fit in well enough to the "main" group.

Looking over the event roster, they've tailored the discussion around gay issues, which I'm sure hardly (if ever) come up at a "regular" convention - so, you know, that's cool and warrants its own convention just to get those topics aired so in this regard I think it's great.

However, that's not the basis on which you made your initial comment and really is what I was attempting to reply to.

Perhaps because of how my gay gamer friends are, I don't see how it's hard to fit in at these events. Just like I wouldn't walk around a convention talking to people about how I like to have sex with women, they wouldn't walk around talking about having sex with guys. And that's the only way in which we differ (except in dress sense, I'm always so jealous of the great business suits one is always buying). So, I don't get that point. I don't see gays skipping through the street holding flowers and singing "la-dilly-la" all day, so, how do they feel excluded or out of place? They're just people, like everyone else - where's the issue?

 

[Erttheking]

Do be perfectly fair I have to ask that question too. I mean, why can't we all go to the same con? I mean, it's not like I would have a problem with a gay person at the same con as me, Hell, one of the people in my circle of nerd friends is OPENLY GAY! And another is bi.

We can all go to the same cons. We'll keep going to the cons we've been going to for years and you can come to our new one that's for us because you're totes supportive of LGBT folk, right?

To be perfectly honest I don't really go to cons at all, and I don't think my friend would go this new con (I could be perfectly wrong here) he doesn't seem like the guy who goes "HEY EVERYBODY! I LIKE MEN!" he seems more like the type of person that goes "yeah, I like guys. So?" Really they can go to this con if they want to, but in my humble opinion it's a little silly. It just seems to imply that there's no way that the LGBT community and the straight community can co-exist and the only solution is to separate ourselves. Call me whatever you wish, but I can't help but feel that this is going to send the wrong message.

 

[geizr]

As one who has been to gaming conventions before, namely GenCon, in particular, I would guess one reason homosexuals would want their own con is so they don't have to be continuously assaulted with all the "that's gay!", "that's so gay!", "Gaaaaayyy!", and "you gay-ass noob!" type comments that gamers so casually and callously spew all the time in reference to something, anything, they don't like, think is wrong, or consider abominable. Imagine having your particular choice of lifestyle being used as a derogatory term or pejorative all the time. Eventually, no matter how you try to tolerate it, it will get under your skin and irritate.

It's similar to how some of us old-schoolers are very sensitive about the word "******" because it has a very particular, insulting, and degrading meaning to us due to the historical context through which some of us actually lived. Online gamers frequently toss the word around with reckless abandon; we can try to ignore it and move on, but, sometimes, after repeat exposure, it can begin to grate against the skin.

The heart of the problem, in my opinion, is the outright thoughtless and careless insensitivity of some gamers toward others, and the fact some gamers can be more ignorant, knuckle-dragging hate-mongers than anyone else I've ever seen.

 

[Sepko]

Why make it a gaming event then? If you need pats on the back and loving acceptance then just make a therapy group or something.

Are you serious? Are y--was that a thing you just typed? Why shouldn't we have an event that celebrates a certain facet in the diamond that is gaming culture? It's not like we'd ban anyone who wasn't LGBT, you can totally go too, cuz you're totally supportive of the LGBT folk, right?

Right?

 

[lacktheknack]

I find the demand for a GaymerCon to be a bit worrying, actually.

If it's all about "feeling like you fit in", what do straight people have to do to make gay people feel like they fit in with everyday life? Clearly, we're doing a bad job.

 

[UniversalRonin]

To me, this just seems like a SIG (Special interest group) like any other SIG that forms in any community whether it's members of a book club who decide to read something different (as well or instead) or Freemasons who all happen to have met each other at the same lodge and happen to like Sherlock Holmes stories. It doesn't hurt anyone, and to people who attend it's likely to cater more to their tastes. These smaller SIG's are perfectly natural, and they form perfectly naturally. It's not self segregation, it honestly just seems like it's a naturally occurring group developing.

For instance, people like me prefer to sit around bathing in nostalgia talking about 90's Strategy games, how none of the modern CIV games comes anywhere near touching the majesty of Civ 2, how great the original Star Wars Dark Forces game was and why Goldeneye will forever be the greatest FPS on a Nintendo. If there are multiples of me, we end up talking together and forming our own natural SIG. Gaymer Con seems like a natural SIG, and probably has a decent following of both hetro/homo people who would want to go. (I'm sure people of any persuasion would like to be at a con where their not about to be called a fag.)

 

[Sepko]

To be perfectly honest I don't really go to cons at all, and I don't think my friend would go this new con (I could be perfectly wrong here) he doesn't seem like the guy who goes "HEY EVERYBODY! I LIKE MEN!" he seems more like the type of person that goes "yeah, I like guys. So?" Really they can go to this con if they want to, but in my humble opinion it's a little stupid. It just seems to imply that there's no way that the LGBT community and the straight community can co-exist and the only solution is to separate ourselves. Call me whatever you wish, but I can't help but feel that this is going to send the wrong message.

I might have to reiterate myself here. We're not banning the straight folk from going to this thing. The straight folk can absolutely come too and be supportive. It's another choice of venue, not a segregation tool.