Out of Context Quotes

[davidmc1158]

"The next time someone leaves me, I'm going with them. I'm sick of my ass too."

 

[The Rogue Wolf]

"There is no easy way out in Disco Purgatory."

 

[The Rogue Wolf]

"You can't have the TV going while you're trying to write a novel. You've gotta clear the room of all distractions! And that's what he does. TV, off. Ghost of his missing son, off. ...wait, what?"

 

[The Rogue Wolf]

"The harmless door is stronger than the murder door."

 

[RhombusHatesYou]

"I'm a fool not an idiot and yes there is a huge differrence."

"I'm not a grammar nazi I'm a grammar stalinist."

"Free beer is always good beer even if it tastes like shit."

"and yet... and yet... would someone tell me what I was talking about?"

 

[Gordon_4]

"Thigh highs are the pushup bras of the leg"

 

[Drathnoxis]

Here's a good one from one of our shift reports at work:

"Maintenance Planner noticed rape in the West plenum wall"

 

[Drathnoxis]

"The handsomest among these maids of honour, a pleasant, frolicsome girl of sixteen, would sometimes set me astride upon one of her nipples, with many other tricks, wherein the reader will excuse me for not being over particular."

 

[Gordon_4]

"The handsomest among these maids of honour, a pleasant, frolicsome girl of sixteen, would sometimes set me astride upon one of her nipples, with many other tricks, wherein the reader will excuse me for not being over particular."

That’s a fucking masterpiece.

 

[Thaluikhain]

That’s a fucking masterpiece.

No pun intended?

 

[The Rogue Wolf]

"It is impolite to withhold firepower."

 

[The Rogue Wolf]

"I've got one of those, um, plane weasels."

 

[CM156]

"If there's on thing we should remember the Confederacy for, it's that they were cringe. And they lost subscriber."

 

[The Rogue Wolf]

"He couldn't risk an international incident! His mom would kill him!"

 

[immortalfrieza]

"There really needs to be a checkout line marked 'antisocial bastards who just want to pay for their fucking shopping.'"

That had to have been said before self checkout lines became a thing.

"Oh hey! There's dick! I love dick!"

"Die monster! You don't belong in this world!"

"Say 'Moose and Squrriel'."

"Old, but not obsolete."

"Your body submits. Your heart succumbs, so why does your mind RESIST?!?"

 

[RhombusHatesYou]

That had to have been said before self checkout lines became a thing.

Since both major supermarket chains in Oz like to video your face (but deny running face rec) while you use the self-checkout they're not as popular as they otherwise would be. Plus a lot of older people still prefer to use cash so avoid the self checkouts like the plague.

 

[Thaluikhain]

Yeah, lots of people really hate them here, because there's often problems and they sack staff to replace them with the machines that need a stff member to run over to sort out whatever has gone wrong this time.

 

[The Rogue Wolf]

"Making these is kind of like returning to a crime scene and explaining to the neighbors why people got stabbed. It's a lot easier to just create new crime scenes."

 

[Drathnoxis]

"True defeat feels like an equine cockhead flaring to unimaginable size somewhere around your belly-button."

 

[Zykon TheLich]

"I'm sorry, but I can only fit so much in my vagina"

"Is that spunk or mayonnaise?.... Bit of both actually"

"There's only so much sausage you can take in one go"