Poll: did i pretty much make this kid snap?

[klaynexas3]

I mean, we'd tell a racist joke or two, but it wasn't strictly on him. We did it to must people and even each other. We'd also say his name in like a funny way, but nothing really discriminating. Just in a cuban accent (by the way, he's cuban).

The answer to your question depends on what kind of situation is really being portrayed in these sentences. It's doubtful that your views and this kid's on what constitute harmless ethnic-joking yuk-yuks are the same, and frankly it sounds to me like you're trying to soft-soap the situation to your own benefit, but I can't know that for sure. Only you can. For future reference, it's pretty common for kids in his situation to pretend to laugh along while seething inside; I absolutely guarantee you that most non-white people you know have had to do this at one time or another.

Of course, most of those people don't haul off and stab somebody. That's over the top regardless of what verbal taunting was or wasn't happening; if the kid had just punched out someone who was hassling him that would be a different story. Nevertheless, you never know who has a violent history, so in general it's a good idea not to go around taunting people you don't know.

actually i knew the dude, like i started knowing him this year, and he was pretty cool and i saw us as friends.

he himself never said anything about it being bullying that made him stab the dude, that's just assumptions made by a counselor at my school. this was sort of the dude's way of saying stop. he didn't try to kill him, he just wanted him to quit messing with him, and got a little extreme with it.

 

[Kyogissun]

I mean, we'd tell a racist joke or two, but it wasn't strictly on him. We did it to must people and even each other. We'd also say his name in like a funny way, but nothing really discriminating. Just in a cuban accent (by the way, he's cuban).

The answer to your question depends on what kind of situation is really being portrayed in these sentences. It's doubtful that your views and this kid's on what constitute harmless ethnic-joking yuk-yuks are the same, and frankly it sounds to me like you're trying to soft-soap the situation to your own benefit, but I can't know that for sure. Only you can. For future reference, it's pretty common for kids in his situation to pretend to laugh along while seething inside; I absolutely guarantee you that most non-white people you know have had to do this at one time or another.

Of course, most of those people don't haul off and stab somebody. That's over the top regardless of what verbal taunting was or wasn't happening; if the kid had just punched out someone who was hassling him that would be a different story. Nevertheless, you never know who has a violent history, so in general it's a good idea not to go around taunting people you don't know.

Pretty much that, hopefully this situation will show you two not to fuck around anymore... Still, a normal case of bullying... The first level of 'violence' is NORMALLY a fist fight or throwing a blunt object at someone, not fucking STABBING a dude.

That really says a lot about the kid, kinda creeps me out to be honest. Especially as someone who's been 'bullied', I find the concept of using knives or guns or anything sharp/lethal in the form of a physical reaction to bullying really disturbing and wrong.

 

[klaynexas3]

The way I grasp it, I've got a couple statements to make:

First off, you and your friend are assholes. If someone's being bothered by your 'teasing' then knock that shit off. If they're not laughing or avoiding letting it get to them, then you need to bug off, there are people willing to put up with asshattery like yours and clearly this guy wasn't one.

Second, the moment he starts trying to pass the blame to you guys is when you call his ass out. Yes, you PROBABLY were the straw that broke the camels back but you know what? HE made the decision to use the knife and HE punctured that guy's lung, NOT you.

A stable person may not 'accept' the teasing he gets but he also learns to not take out his frustration or stress on others. This guy CLEARLY is not stable. Maybe it's his environment, maybe he's crazy, I dunno, but he's got the makings of a bad person. First it's stabbing and then... Well, it could be more.

So, next time you talk to the counselor, I advise you to do this, admit you were wrong in taunting him and apologize for it, but do NOT accept AT ALL that you guys are the cause of HIM STABBING the other dude. Once more, HE made the decision to stab the guy in the lung, not you two.

That's all.

just saying, he joined in, and acted like he was having a good time when we did it. he laughed with us, he messed with other people with us(whom also mess with us, we don't mess with anyone that isn't our friend and that we don't know if they're cool with it or not. and yes, i realize that obviously he must not have been cool with it) he just seemed like he was having a good time.
and yes, i did apologize to the counselor, admitted what i did was wrong, but he still treats me like i was the one that stabbed the dude.

That's because you're still trying to minimalise the whole thing. Stop saying 'oh, he joined in...it was only a LITTLE bit racist (like hell it was)...he was having a good time...'. Assholes like you say that all the time. If he was having a good time, he wouldn't have reacted like that. More like he was trying to laugh it off in the hope that you'd go pick on someone else, and didn't want to give you the satisfaction of knowing he was upset.

Stop making excuses and accept your responsibility.

fine, i'm a terrible person and i should go kill myself because i said a dudes name in a funny way and said a racist joke. i should burn in hell for all eternity. happy?

 

[Deguasser]

It's called he has an actual mental disorder most likely, unless this was done to him all the time

 

[DaggerOfCompassion]

so, there's this kid who rides my bus, and one of my friends is also friends with the dude. my friend kind of messes around with the kid, so i did i bit of the same. he tended to laugh at it a bit, cause it wasn't like name calling, i mean, we'd tell a racist joke or two, but it wasn't strictly on him, we did it to must people, even each other. we'd also say his name in like a funny way, nothing really discriminating, just in like a cuban accent(by the way, he's cuban). so, yesterday, this other guy on our bus, that morning had a poptart, and put it on the dudes head. now, the dude stabbed my friend in the arm first with a shank he made out of a pen, thinking it was him. then, in the afternoon, he try's to do the same to the kid that actually put the poptart on his head. the kid punches the dude in the face. now, they get off at the same stop, so on the poptart dudes way home, the cuban kid stabs him, with a knife, in the chest, and it punctures his lung. he's now in a lot of trouble. now, my friend says that us messing with him, isn't what caused it, but the counselor at our school says otherwise. anyway, i want to know, am i at fault here? did i pretty much stab the guy because i messed with this one kid just sort of joking with him? or do you think he was already messed up and just had bad anger issues? just as some more information, he has had some violent behavior before i even really met him.

Well obviously you were at fault. Not fully of course, your friends helped, but you sure did a lot.

Fitting screen name, ehh?


No, you aren't. If he wasn't confident enough to ask you to stop, but had enough balls to shank someone, he probably has a few issues.

So OP racially mocks some kid and the kid responds with something other then gratitude and praise, so the kid who was mocked has issues? I think he was perfectly justified acting with violence against his peers who were violent to him.

 

[Dags90]

What you did was wrong. Stop trying to look for a way to absolve yourself and stop playing the blame game. Grow up.

 

[VicunaBlue]

so, there's this kid who rides my bus, and one of my friends is also friends with the dude. my friend kind of messes around with the kid, so i did i bit of the same. he tended to laugh at it a bit, cause it wasn't like name calling, i mean, we'd tell a racist joke or two, but it wasn't strictly on him, we did it to must people, even each other. we'd also say his name in like a funny way, nothing really discriminating, just in like a cuban accent(by the way, he's cuban). so, yesterday, this other guy on our bus, that morning had a poptart, and put it on the dudes head. now, the dude stabbed my friend in the arm first with a shank he made out of a pen, thinking it was him. then, in the afternoon, he try's to do the same to the kid that actually put the poptart on his head. the kid punches the dude in the face. now, they get off at the same stop, so on the poptart dudes way home, the cuban kid stabs him, with a knife, in the chest, and it punctures his lung. he's now in a lot of trouble. now, my friend says that us messing with him, isn't what caused it, but the counselor at our school says otherwise. anyway, i want to know, am i at fault here? did i pretty much stab the guy because i messed with this one kid just sort of joking with him? or do you think he was already messed up and just had bad anger issues? just as some more information, he has had some violent behavior before i even really met him.

Well obviously you were at fault. Not fully of course, your friends helped, but you sure did a lot.

Fitting screen name, ehh?


No, you aren't. If he wasn't confident enough to ask you to stop, but had enough balls to shank someone, he probably has a few issues.

So OP racially mocks some kid and the kid responds with something other then gratitude and praise, so the kid who was mocked has issues? I think he was perfectly justified acting with violence against his peers who were violent to him.

If I am to believe the OP, the kid who shanked the other guy seemed to be playing along with it. Teenage kids fuck around with each other all the time, OP Probably thought that was what was going on.

 

[zero_blahs]

no your not (I dont beleive the story so its more hypothetical) the kid brought a shank thats fucked up.
I would of knocked your teeth in if i was really pissed off but a shank common thats just messed.
Also It doesnt matter if they picked on his race, sexuality ect.
Nothing justifies attacking your peers with a weapon.

 

[CD-R]

Who the hell is the guy with the pop tart? Is he a friend of yours too?

 

[Fwee]

I can only give some advice:
Try to learn from the experience, maybe work on your empathy and compassion towards others. If you feel you've crossed a line, maybe try an apology with some explanation ("things got out of hand, etc.")
Here's my best advice: Be careful when you piss someone off.

 

[RickF7666]

You did not stab anyone so don't let any of these people tell you that you are responsible. No one is responsible for anyone else's actions, everyone makes their own choices.

I was in the military and the excuse that you were just following orders doesn't fly. If you are ordered to break the law and then do it, guess what you get court-martialed right along with the one who gave you that order.

It's called personal responsibility, which means you and only you are responsible for your actions. Laying blame on an external source for someones actions is one of the real banes of our civilization. Thus the constant attempts to censor things, be that movies, comics or video games.

 

[thom_cat_]

He should have just asked you to stop.
Yes you are partially at fault, but fucking hell, making a shank and stabbing people is definitely not the way to respond to that stuff.

 

[bak00777]

no you are not at fault

 

[markisb]

you didn't make him snap but u certainly wound him up. People used to do that to me and i always hated it ,i guess he had enough with all the jokes. Your friend and the guy that got stabbed absolutely deserved it.

 

[Callate]

I can't really know, because I don't know what you guys said to him, or the context, or what the atmosphere was really like- I can't know if he was actually laughing about your kidding or if he was just trying to "laugh it off". It sounds like the kid had one really bad day and it was just too much- everything, even things that might not have bothered him, was suddenly more than he could take. Some days are like that. And while, perhaps, you shouldn't have teased him, it also really sounds, albeit in hindsight, that your intent wasn't malicious and that if you had known that what you saw as "teasing" could provoke such a reaction, you wouldn't have had a part in it.

But like I say, I wasn't there, so I can't say with authority that I have enough perspective to condemn or absolve you. I guess the best you can do is be sorry and try to let what happened shape your later actions.

 

[i7omahawki]

Getting picked on and stabbing someone are two totally unequivocal things. From the details you've shared it doesn't seem as though it was bullying, more teasing. You're teasing him was bad because you were teasing him. Him deciding to stab people is another matter entirely. If your teasing made him hate himself so much he studied to become something great, and did, your teasing still wasn't a good thing.

How he reacted to your bad actions is his own problem. People have the ability to choose, even under pressure. It is a kind of self-defeating principle to say you caused him to stab someone, without your actions being caused by someone else's, ad infinitum.

Basically, you were a bit of a dick, but nowhere near as much as him.

 

[Curtisthekiller]

1You helped bully him until he felt he had no choice but to respond with violence.

2You need to seriously reexamine your behavior and learn how to treat other human beings with respect.

sounds like he had every choice to me, he chose to wait untill he was alone untill he atempted to MURDER SOMEONE as opposed to, ya'know talking to someone.

also you look at this story and see an atempted murderer with a past and a kid who has friends and jokes around and you don't go after stabby'mc staberson?
i don't know bolth sides of this story but i know that the 'cuban kid' currently seems to have all the makeings of a poorly executed double homicide then spending another 40 years on death row or in prision being a drain on the resourses of every tax payer in a america as a last middle finger to calm people everywhere but i digress...

if someone treats you like you stabbed someone when you diden't tell him to stop being an asshole and to pass you the ball, can't go through life getting dirty looks from everyone who gets stabed or it will get to ya.

 

[Singularly Datarific]

How was he even still in school at the end of the day after 2 stabbings?

My thoughts exactly...
How did he?

 

[klaynexas3]

How was he even still in school at the end of the day after 2 stabbings?

My thoughts exactly...
How did he?

i already replied to the post you quoted, it's up on this page towards the top.