Poll: It's not gay if...

GeneralFungi

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Jul 1, 2010
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I'm gay. That means primarily I'm searching for romantic partners of the same sex as I, and for the most part I would only really consider being emotionally bonded with someone of the same sex as myself.

But I can still imagine myself having a positive sexual experience with a woman. I wouldn't call you gay if you voluntarily had sex with another man. I would just call you open minded or simply bi-curious.

While I could see myself enjoying a sexual experience with a consenting women, I don't see myself becoming a part of a serious relationship with one. I don't think I'd be as satisfied waking up in the same bed with a woman as I would with a handsome dude. And I wouldn't find it as natural to kiss a woman in the same way as I would a person of the same gender to me. Sex is just the sensation of rubbing body parts together, but passion is deeper and much more meaningful then that.

I'd say you're still be completely straight if you couldn't see yourself being in a dedicated relationship with someone of the same sex and would rather only pursue men for the occasional sexual experience. I've heard of people who claim they are 100% straight men, but they've occasionally allowed themselves to have anal with other men because they simply enjoy the sensation. And I believe them.

Sorry if anyone feels uncomfortable reading this. Sex is icky and all that.
 

Caiphus

Social Office Corridor
Mar 31, 2010
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I've heard it's not gay if you don't push back!!

Ha ha haaaaaaa.

But yeah, I would consider getting blown by a guy to be gay. But since being gay is fine, what's the problem?
 
Dec 15, 2009
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The only real answer to this question is that, if they're as good looking as Michael Fassbender, it doesn't matter what you do, it's still not gay. Really though, if you know that it's a man then it is homosexual, if not then no, not really.
 

Jamieson 90

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Mar 29, 2010
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Becoming aroused or experiencing pleasure whilst one or more of your sexual organs is being simulated does not make you straight, gay or bi, it's just your body's natural response to being simulated, hence many rape victims are confused since many enjoy the act despite it not wanting to happen. Simply put your sexual orientation is defined by who you're attracted to and who you want to have sex with, so if you were straight and given a blow job by another guy you could potentially find the act in itself pleasing even if you're greatly uncomfortable with who's performing it, and if you were blindfolded and didn't know who was doing it you probably wouldn't be able to tell. The type of sex you have has no bearing on your orientation whereas who you want to have sex with does.
 

Kal-Adam

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May 7, 2010
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Lets break it down real simple for you. Are you sexually attracted to a member of the same gender? If no, then it's not gay. If yes, then it IS gay.
 

barbzilla

He who speaks words from mouth!
Dec 6, 2010
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krazykidd said:
... You're the one getting a blowjob. It's a phrase iv'e heard quite a few times , mostly as a joke , but i'm wondering if there is any truth to it .

Okay to start off , i'm completely heterosexual, i'm comfortable enough with my sexuality , to be able to say when a guy is goodlooking ( be he has to be REAL good looking ) , but i have absolutely 0 attraction to men . Now i was having a conversation with a female friend of mine , and she asked me if i would get a blowjob from a man . I said no . She told me that i wouldn't be able to tell the difference if i was blindfolded, and she went on the say she wanted to test this out ( for god knows what reason ).

Anyways , that got me thinking , if a person ,got blowjobS from another man and enjoyed it , would that make me a homosexual? Or is it possible , to be able to enjoy being pleased by someone of the same sex without necessarily being gay?
Okay, well this is a story I have never shared before, but seeing as how it may help you out (and I have a bit of anonymity due to it being the internet), I will share it.

I am not homosexual, but I did have a period of self questioning (which I have been told is perfectly normal for anyone). Well my buddy Rick asked me over for a party (Rick is bi-sexual, but I didn't know it at the time). Well I got to the party, and it was rather wild. After a few hours I had managed to get fairly inebriated and was having a very fun conversation with a few of women and my buddy Rick that was somewhat sexual in nature. This conversation (combined with drinking and dancing intermittently) continued for a number of hours until the party had pretty much died. At this point there were just the five of us left (Rick, the 3 women, and myself), and with how much we had drank, Rick decided it would be best if we all just slept it off there.

Rick only had two beds though, so I let the girls have one room, and told Rick to keep his own bed because I would sleep on the recliner. Well after seeing everyone off to bed, I settled in to go to sleep on the chair (which didn't take too long). After a bit of sleep, I was woken up in one of my favorite ways (though I usually prefer to know the person preforming this particular act prior to the act itself, little did I know...). It was actually one of the best blowjobs I have had in my life up to that point, and was rather into it. However I didn't open my eyes until the deed was done, and it was not the person I was expecting to be there. My buddy Rick had decided that I must be gay after the conversation we were having with the girls during the party (I actually get that more often than you would expect), and decided that he was going to come out to me.

The strange thing was, I wasn't upset that I had been given a blowjob by a guy. I was super pissed about the betrayal of trust at first, but later realized that I shouldn't be since I was perfectly okay with it when I thought it was some strange woman that I had only just met (that process took me a week or so though). After a few days though I had calmed down and it did raise some questions in me about my sexuality. So I explored the thought that I might be gay or bi for a bit, and did some small experiments for a while. They never did pan out though, as I just wasn't all that attracted to guys in general.

As far as what this means for you, provided that whatever is on your penis doesn't freak you out, it is the action alone that is causing the ejaculation, not attraction, nor love. It is a purely mechanical response to stimulation, though you can't be in the wrong state of mind for it to work (I.E. if you are purposely resisting it based on the sole concept that it is a guy down there, then you will likely not get off, if you get an erection at all).

TLDR: I've had a guy suck my dick before without my knowing who it was. It felt good, I got off, then I found out and got pissed after it was over. Once I got over it, I tested my own sexuality and realized I was straight. The only thing that could change your mind about your sexuality is if you are actually attracted to guys, but didn't realize it before getting your dick sucked. Other than that, you are straight and just experimenting (which only makes you human).
 

The Lugz

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Apr 23, 2011
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krazykidd said:
... You're the one getting a blowjob. It's a phrase iv'e heard quite a few times , mostly as a joke , but i'm wondering if there is any truth to it .

Okay to start off , i'm completely heterosexual, i'm comfortable enough with my sexuality , to be able to say when a guy is goodlooking ( be he has to be REAL good looking ) , but i have absolutely 0 attraction to men . Now i was having a conversation with a female friend of mine , and she asked me if i would get a blowjob from a man . I said no . She told me that i wouldn't be able to tell the difference if i was blindfolded, and she went on the say she wanted to test this out ( for god knows what reason ).

Anyways , that got me thinking , if a person ,got blowjobS from another man and enjoyed it , would that make me a homosexual? Or is it possible , to be able to enjoy being pleased by someone of the same sex without necessarily being gay?

if someone has ultimately usurped your control over your sexuality and you're ok with that you just like kinky shit.
( and lord knows, I be a kinky shit expert myself. )

so.. basically 'gayness' has nothing to do with it if you want to submit to sexual experiments.

its a taboo to submit to something like this aka knowing there's a man and a woman in the room and they have to fight over you and you only get to tell afterwards who got the uh, 'prize'

I would say it makes you:

( pick your favourite )
1 odd
2 extremely open
3 very very bored..

but not specifically gay.

it would be gay if you knew it was the guy who 'got you' and enjoyed that, or maby just hoped for it..
that's my interpretation of the situation but feel free to spin it how you like, there are no hard and fast rules on sexuality... mostly because it's too controversial to cover thoroughly!
 

Easton Dark

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Jan 2, 2011
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I've gotten one and I'm still pretty sure I'm straight. I really don't think you could tell the difference between a man's and a woman's mouth, so go for it. Blindfolded, not blindfolded, it doesn't matter, your dick's going to respond.
 

Hawk eye1466

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May 31, 2010
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I'd say if you were blindfolded or didn't know it isn't gay since you don't know and you can't prevent yourself from getting hard and off when your getting stimulated.
 

Superlative

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May 14, 2012
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OP, gay acts don't make you gay. If you find yourself having crushes or urges for other men, then u would be either gay or bi. if not, then ur not. even if you...caught a few pitches u still wouldn't be gay if you don't find men honestly attractive.
 

ImperialSunlight

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Nov 18, 2009
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In the situation you were talking about (being blindfolded), I would say that wouldn't make you gay. Assumably you'd imagine the person doing it to be a woman, and besides that, it's a blowjob. Unless you're asexual or something, you're going to get aroused by it. So, yeah, unless you get aroused or attracted by the person doing it being a man, I wouldn't call it gay, per se. Homosexuality and heterosexuality are, however, in my opinion, partially a social construct rather than a physical reality. People get it in their head by genetic inclination, or otherwise that they can only be attracted to one sex and train a repulsion of the other. Actual sexual arousal tends to come from both sexual fantasy (which I believe includes thoughts of gender) and physical stimulation. That's why you wouldn't necessarily not enjoy a blowjob from a man even if you're straight. The stimulation is pretty much the same. The only way you could not be aroused by extreme stimulation such as that is fear or repulsion of the gender you are not attracted to. Sorry for rambling, those are just my thoughts, and it's really late so I apologize if they make no sense...
 

Something Amyss

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Dec 3, 2008
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Vegosiux said:
Seeing as how women and men's anuses are anatomically identical, is wanting anal sex gay, even if with a woman? ^^
I use this one on friends all the time. It's pretty easy to guess which ones like anal based on who gets flustered.
 

wulf3n

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Mar 12, 2012
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Zachary Amaranth said:
Vegosiux said:
Seeing as how women and men's anuses are anatomically identical, is wanting anal sex gay, even if with a woman? ^^
I use this one on friends all the time. It's pretty easy to guess which ones like anal based on who gets flustered.
Just for the sake of clarity, is it those who get flustered like anal or vice versa?
 

Paradoxrifts

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Jan 17, 2010
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Vegosiux said:
Seeing as how women and men's anuses are anatomically identical, is wanting anal sex gay, even if with a woman? ^^
While the penis itself might not be able to tell the difference, I'm quite positive that my hip bones would be able to tell the difference between repeatedly bumping uglies into a lady's lush posterior and a man's bony backside. And I'm not willing to up-size to the point that a man's rump starts to resemble that of a woman.

What does puts me off anal is knowing the amount of preparation that had to occur to make the area clear for landing, and the alternative of rolling around in the mud and the blood is just putrid as far as I'm concerned. I'm not at all phased by heterosexual anal porn, so long as the actress looks to be enjoying herself it doesn't interrupt things on my end. And I suppose that I would do it if I was pressured into it by a girl who was hellbent on having it that way, but I wouldn't go actively seeking it out. A woman already has all the necessary equipment needed for love-making without jury-rigging an alternative.

All the more power to those who have resort to a Macgyver solution to make love to who they love, but I don't. So I won't.
 

Abomination

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Dec 17, 2012
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Taurus Vis said:
Who cares? We as a society need to give up these notions of defining somebody by particular acts, character traits or physical traits. We're all just people, and as long we categorize and define people, they will continue to be artificial barriers that stop us from truly being ourselves among our peers.
I mean, if you engage in theft you're not a thief, if you engage in murder you're not a murderer, if you engage in rape you're not a rapist, if you bake things professionally you're not a baker, if you bank professionally you're not a banker, if you engage in politics professionally you're not a politician, if you engage in sports professionally you're not a sportsman and if you engage in homosexuality you're not a homosexual.
 

gazumped

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Dec 1, 2010
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If you get off to pleasuring yourself with a dildo or fleshlight does that make you objectophilic? Or does just masturbating with your hand make you manusphilic?

If you're getting off because a man's giving you a blowjob then you're probably into men, but if you're getting off just because you're getting a blowjob (not because it's a man giving you one) then you're just getting off because it feels good, surely?

My relevant anecdote: I do have a straight male friend who had a blowjob from a gay male acquaintance once. He's never seemed the least bit interested in males otherwise and isn't defensive about it or his sexuality so I doubt he's in the closet. When we asked him what it was like he said "It was alright, but the scratching of his beard was kind of offputting."
 

Me55enger

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Dec 16, 2008
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Folk who are capable of appreciating the attractriveness of someone of thier own gender are people who are entirely comfortable in thier sexuality.

I look at guys and think of them attractive. it's not something I dwell on, so I don't have a personal preference, but I have, I can and I do. Nothing wrong with that.

Am I gay? Nope.