Poll: Which Chaos god would you serve?

[Yelchor]

I shall serve the Lord of Change and his magnificent designs!

What I found really intriguing about Tzeentch was how it had power over almost all happenings in the universe, from the smallest plots and events to the most awesome and impacting happenings. It has an agenda, while mysterious, might not necessarily be of ill-intent. It wants to keep things from stagnating, to ensure that all that is is kept changing so that diversity might be maintained. Which could be argued for being a good cause.

Tzeentch plans all...

 

[Tiger Sora]

More heretics for this Commissar's bolter to cut down.

Also, wheres the option for Chaos undivided? Some wish to serve all you know. Think of Cultist Chan!

 

[Zeke63]

OP you have framed the results by giving bad descriptions of the chaos gods!. They make Tzeentch sound too appealing and powerful compared to the others which is not true! Also, Slaneesh is the god of pain, not just pleasure. Still cool poll but don't frame it BRO

 

[Headdrivehardscrew]

Why limit yourself to made-up Warhammer deities? Why not give Lovecraft some love? Why not accept that our 'real' Gods got us into enough trouble, turmoil, bloodshed and chaos already?

Really, I couldn't pick any of those offered without feeling like an utter tool. Nurgle stinks, Slaneesh is a whore, Tzeentch is a filthy liar... yeah, come to think of it, your choice only contains one valid option. The only 'honest' deity here would be Khorne. Yeah, since there's no other option offered, I'll go with Khorne. Don't really like the guy, though.

There must be a reason you omitted Malal, which would probably be the purest incarnation of chaos.

 

[Sir Thomas Sean Connery]

If that's ACTUALLY what they gave their cultists, I'd go with Tzeentch.

However, given that they all just want to fuck you any way they can, I'll go with the sexy one who's picture I can't even post because of her beautifully massive girl-cock.

No, the galaxy will not burn. THE GALAXY SHALL FUCK.

 

[bartholen_v1legacy]

OP you have framed the results by giving bad descriptions of the chaos gods!. They make Tzeentch sound too appealing and powerful compared to the others which is not true! Also, Slaneesh is the god of pain, not just pleasure. Still cool poll but don't frame it BRO

Vanish from here, loyalist scum!

I tried to make the offerings equally desirable. The Nurgle one might be a bit exaggerated, but not so far from the truth. He doesn't offer any power or pleasure. I could have also written down the cost for each, but who'd want to serve any of them then? When you serve Tzeentch, you get limitless knowledge, but don't get nearly any physical perks and ultimately end up either as a soulless, mindless pawn in his great scheme or mutated beyond recognition and sanity.

 

[Blackdoom]

Gotta go with Malal seeing as you won't give him any love in the poll.

 

[renegade7]

[sub]God I love Malal. WHY DID YOU ALL BUT RETCON HIM GW, WHYYYYY?[/sub]

Malal is not technically GW's property, so they had to change his name to Malice and not talk about him too much.

 

[Ignatz_Zwakh]

Tzeentch! Make me wise & birdlike!

 

[MrPeanut]

Once we finish the Great Project, all you chaos scum will be stuck in warphell with your "gods".

Why would you need that? There's already a lone Grey Knight coked up heavier than Tony Montana going around going all Bane-breaking-Batman on the 40k chaos forces anyway.

For kicks.

That's kinda the reason Necrons do anything anymore.

 

[nykirnsu]

I know. I was only pretending to naively take the OP's deceptive description at face value to root out Heretics.

Looks like we've got another one who's a bit too familiar with the machinations of Chaos...

The Inquisition merely fulfils the duty of its office!

Bah! The Emperor is a weak-minded fool! One day the traitor legions will take over, and all your kind will be purged from the Imperium (which will be renamed 'Chaos-land', we're devoted but not very creative, what with having very similar names to loyalists and all).

OT: Tzeentch, I like change.

 

[opiwankenobi]

Bah! The Emperor is a weak-minded fool! One day the traitor legions will take over, and all your kind will be purged from the Imperium (which will be renamed 'Chaos-land', we're devoted but not very creative, what with having very similar names to loyalists and all).

OT: Tzeentch, I like change.

Dream on, Chaos scum. Get past the Cadian Gate, then we 'll talk. And if you manage that, the Gray Knights are waiting.

 

[SillySam]

Knowledge is power
Guess that says who I'll serve

 

[Cookiegerard]

Well, as my psyker is Dark Heresy always says "I'll worship anything as long as I don't have to die." Naturally, this is never said in front of the Inquisition.

 

[Rawne1980]

Slaanesh for me.

If I have to go to war with the Empire of Man then i'm doing it pissed, semi naked and fucking a Daemonette.

 

[Naeras]

Tzeentch.

Or that's what I would choose, if it wasn't that Khorne offers something no other god does:

 

[Judgment90]

Except the things that you can't change. Which could easily result in a mindbreaking existential crisis, seeing as you will never have a sustained impact upon the universe.

You know, that.

I know, that is why I would use my knowledge to manipulate certain events into my favor.

 

[Smolderin]

Hrmmm...lets see. I have internal anger issues, a substantial hate for anything breathing....ya...Khorne it is. I would make a good Blood Champion.

 

[ChaplainOrion]

Slaanesh, because sexy rape chariots.

And also it's the only one that allows me to rock, man.

 

[lRookiel]

papa nurgle will care for me and all who follow him.

Plus ya know, immortality is awesome.