Poll: Would you join the Space Marines?

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Jun 11, 2008
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Texas Joker 52 said:
No I wouldn't, even if I could. I don't know much about Warhammer 40k, but what I have read due to my growing interest is that, at the point in time the series is at, Humans have become xenophobic assholes who think that you are either a Human, or inferior. Personally, I absolutely hate that view, though that might be due to my love of a good alien.

That's why I would probably join the Tau. Their society might have a caste based system, but their philosophy doesn't prevent, say, a human from joining, and they believe that all are equal, and all are valued. That, along with freedom of religion (so long as it doesn't interfere with The Greater Good, which I will address in a moment), makes it even more attractive. They follow the ideology of The Greater Good, which while vague to me at the moment, is an attractive prospect. They also happen to be the only traveling army that actually seeks out a peaceful solution to whatever planet they come across, provided it isn't inhabited by Orks, Tyranids, or Chaos Space Marines, and if they can't peacefully annex the planet, then they resort to war.

True, that may seem harsh, but compared to what I've read about the Imperium, The Greater Good is like comparing an old, kind of stale chocolate chip cookie, and an entire bowl of fresh cookies, straight out of an oven. Despite its imperfections, the Imperium started out really trying to be a great thing. Unfortunately, it took a turn for the worse. The Tau simply seem like they're going the same general way, and kept to it a little better. Though, that's simply me.
To equate the Tau to anything they can be a bit like the Combine or Stalinist Russia. They are called Space Commies for a reason. Well I may be wrong as I haven't read any lore in ages but they to assimilate more like stuff like the Borg rather than have peaceful solutions and relations.
 

Lonely Swordsman

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Jun 29, 2009
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Marcius Flavius (Seargent said:
"One does not request to be a space marine, boy. One is offered the chance to serve the Emperor and you are not worthy. How old are you? Fifteen? Sixteen? When I was sixteen I had already killed four orkz with an autogun and a machete and been serving in the Planetary Defense Forces of my homeworld for three years. I was considered a weak recruit."
Just something to consider for everyone who still answered positively (read: WRONG) to the question.
 

BlueMage

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Jan 22, 2008
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Sam Warrior said:
Personally I'd rather join the Tau less brain washing and more shiny guns :)
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Hahahahaha

ha...

LESS brainwashing? Good Emperor, lurk moar.

For all the terrible things about being one of the Emperor's finest, there are plenty things better. As a normal, unaltered human, you will die. Most likely in an incredibly painful manner, on the end of an ork choppa, under the delicate ministrations of a Dark Eldar hommunculus, or just vaped where you stand by a necron. If you're lucky, the Tau will sterilise you and have you work in a factory for the Greater Good. The Imperium at least won't sterilise you (if anything, have MOAR BABIES! FOR TERRA!) even if they do work you a minimum of 12 hours a day, 7 standard Terran days a Terran week.

Funny thing, y'all is bitching about "I'LL LOSE MY FREEDOM AND JUST BE A SLAVE!!!" - *****, you'll be a slave regardless. This is the 41st Millennium, no-one gives a shit about your rights and thoughts and dreams.

Yeah, I'll take being a power-armoured killing machine. I'll even take being a genuinely mind-wiped and reprogrammed psyker power-armoured killing machine. At least then when I die, no doubt in great pain on a planet no-one really cares about, it'll be because I'm doing something worthwhile that someone else (filthy xenos or heretic) didn't really want me to do.

Incidentally, Marines can drink. They just can't get drunk on alcohol, alcohol being a toxin, plenty of the extra organs removing toxins either shortly after ingestion or before (with the exception of certain Fenrisian blends which actually suppress the activity of one of the extra organs, premonor I think) which is kinda a plus - unless you're one of those noobs who drinks just to get drunk, in which case drive off a bridge please.
 

BlueMage

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Jan 22, 2008
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chimpzy said:
The Tau aren't much better than the other factions. They just appear to be. There is no good, or even decent, in 40K. I would guess the Ultramarines realm of Ultramar is actually about the closest to a decent place to live, barring the occasional Tyranid invasions.
Ultramar is something of a paradise in comparison - one of the few places in the galaxy where you can live without necessarily dying bloodily and in great pain.

Except, yeah, when a Hive fleet happens by. Good thing there're all these big fellas in blue around, who actually seem to give a shit about the people they're supposed to protect, eh?
 

Dr. wonderful

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Dec 31, 2009
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No.

I want to be a Angry marine under Commissar fuklaw.



DO YOU THINK YOU CAN FUCKING WIN AGAINST US!? YOU STUPID BADGER FUCK UP! WE'RE GOING TO DROP OUR MAXIMUM FUCK UPON YOU!


*Nod head*
 

SniperMacFox

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Jun 26, 2009
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I've played 40K for around eight years and for those eight years I've played Space Marines, even when given an opportunity to change to another force or "convert" to chaos. But if I was in the Space Marine universe, I'm joining the cult of Tzeentch. Magic shapeshift powers FTW!
 

shintakie10

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BlueMage said:
Sam Warrior said:
Personally I'd rather join the Tau less brain washing and more shiny guns :)
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Hahahahaha

ha...

LESS brainwashing? Good Emperor, lurk moar.

For all the terrible things about being one of the Emperor's finest, there are plenty things better. As a normal, unaltered human, you will die. Most likely in an incredibly painful manner, on the end of an ork choppa, under the delicate ministrations of a Dark Eldar hommunculus, or just vaped where you stand by a necron. If you're lucky, the Tau will sterilise you and have you work in a factory for the Greater Good. The Imperium at least won't sterilise you (if anything, have MOAR BABIES! FOR TERRA!) even if they do work you a minimum of 12 hours a day, 7 standard Terran days a Terran week.

Funny thing, y'all is bitching about "I'LL LOSE MY FREEDOM AND JUST BE A SLAVE!!!" - *****, you'll be a slave regardless. This is the 41st Millennium, no-one gives a shit about your rights and thoughts and dreams.

Yeah, I'll take being a power-armoured killing machine. I'll even take being a genuinely mind-wiped and reprogrammed psyker power-armoured killing machine. At least then when I die, no doubt in great pain on a planet no-one really cares about, it'll be because I'm doing something worthwhile that someone else (filthy xenos or heretic) didn't really want me to do.

Incidentally, Marines can drink. They just can't get drunk on alcohol, alcohol being a toxin, plenty of the extra organs removing toxins either shortly after ingestion or before (with the exception of certain Fenrisian blends which actually suppress the activity of one of the extra organs, premonor I think) which is kinda a plus - unless you're one of those noobs who drinks just to get drunk, in which case drive off a bridge please.
Bah, the Tau were actually a good race until the 40k fans bitched and moaned that their 40k universe was supposed to be full of emo and assholes and somethin that didn't fit that mold should be purged.
 

SniperMacFox

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Jun 26, 2009
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Dr. wonderful said:
No.

I want to be a Angry marine under Commissar fuklaw.

*Nod head*
...I'm guessing that they're one of the "Files lost by the archives" chapters, eh?

Edit: Just looked them up on Google. They have a fan-fiction series. This is amazing. Dumb, but still amazing.
 

TheEndlessSleep

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Sep 1, 2010
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As I understand it you don't get a choice - you are merely called into service if you are good enough.

However, were it a choice - the answer is definitley. 7ft Super soldiers FTW :)
 

dogenzakaminion

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Jun 15, 2010
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Hell no, as people have mentioned the journey to becoming one is horrible, and actually being one isn't really that great. I don't want to be a part of the Imperium of Man anyway. Defect and join the Eldar. They have the hottest babes anyway...
 

Dr. wonderful

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Dec 31, 2009
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SniperMacFox said:
Dr. wonderful said:
No.

I want to be a Angry marine under Commissar fuklaw.

*Nod head*
...I'm guessing that they're one of the "Files lost by the archives" chapters, eh?

Edit: Just looked them up on Google. They have a fan-fiction series. This is amazing. Dumb, but still amazing.
That the EXACT same thing I said!

But that is not even their BEST moment.

fought the Chaos God Nurgle to a near standstill, throwing everything they could at it. Then, when that was not enough, they threw what they couldn't: Their Battle Barge, The Litany Of Litany's Litany. That shut the demon up. Just long enough for them to hit it with a second battle barge, The Maximum Fuck. And the Angry Marines may or may not have been rocking out on it while it descended in flames upon the demon's head. [http://1d4chan.org/images/8/86/Hell_Yeah_by_Gannadene.jpg]
Yeah...Worth it, to join them.
 

Delsana

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Aug 16, 2011
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Cheshire the Cat said:
Fuck no. Being a space marine would suck ass.
They recruit children, as in pre puberty. The testing alone will probably kill ya, if not then the surgeries probably will.
And even if you do survive to be a space marine, its still pretty shit.

Your personality is pretty much wiped by psycho indoctrination, your emotions are dulled, your entire life becomes nothing more than fight and train, oh and you do not even get to fuck anything since you no longer even have a penis.
Ask any body builder. As they gain muscle their penises start to shrink since the body basically builds up around it. Same with over weight guys. The dick stays the same length but the body swallows it. Exact same thing with Marines. So basically all you are left with is a tiny little mushroom head to piss out of...
Actually they sterilize you and remove your sexual drive though I think you still maintain a penis but it flopping around in the armor suit would probably be an irritance so why not just chop it off and use another means for testosterone.

They do maintain a personality though.
 

Delsana

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Aug 16, 2011
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TheDarkEricDraven said:
Evidently you do not join. But I wouldn't want to be, thats for sure. Its always Space Marine, you know? Never Space Nanny or Space Gardner. I really wish there was more options.
Well you could be a Space Wolf and if you survived their training and the absolute cold then you could control a wolf... so you're a Space Pet-master.
 

Delsana

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Hal10k said:
You do not "join" the Space Marines. You are recruited out of populations of several trillions if you happen to possess the right characteristics, namely a near omnicidal lust for combat and the rough shape of a rather muscular flatbed truck. You also have to possess these characteristics as a child, becase adults tend to go completely insane from the transformation as opposed to only mostly insane. After being "recruited", you're put through several years of training in which you will, more often than not, die. If you don't, you're outfitted with several superfluous organs, genetically modified to make you an even more absurd specimen of manliness, and brainwashed into fanatically supporting the empire and its various conflicting ideologies. If you somehow manage to survive that, congratulations, you're a scout.
This is absolutely correct, although it should be indicated that you also have to fight Chaos indoctrination which makes you deformed, get to have things implanted in your head just to depict your service record, and of course the transplants have numerous other ways to kill you than you stated.
 

TheRightToArmBears

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Dec 13, 2008
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Hell no. They wouldn't select me, partially because I'm too old. That, and I don't want to get turned into a brainwashed muscle-weapon-thing. And I don't want to have to fight chaos, or tyranids especially. And I really wouldn't want to fight Eldar, because they're awesome, and don't give a fuck.

Lets be honest, Eldar have really got it sussed. Dark Eldar are pirate BDSM enthusiasts, Exodite worlds are hippy farmers, and Craftworld Eldar are just immeasurably badass. Seriously, an entire craftworld was in the eye of terror for thousands of years and came back out of it, casual. When Man turned to Chaos they fucked their own shit up, but when Eldar turned to chaos they created another fucking god. Why do Space Marines even bother?
 

nin_ninja

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Nov 12, 2009
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No! The Space Marines are just futuristic Templars. They serve an Emperor and destroy the heathens (meaning other Space Marines, humans and aliens). Nobody in the WH 40K universe is nice though. The Tau are maybe the nicest, but they really don't like humans.
 

Lunar Templar

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Sep 20, 2009
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Aris Khandr said:
Going to go with no. Adepta Sororitas, on the other hand, sure. I'm at least properly 'equipped' for that one.
if i was a girl, this, so much this XD also, as a plus you see a lot of them with the mark of the Inquisition, so LOADS of power there

but I'm not a girl, so kills that. but would i "join"?

well lemme answer that with this

No Pity, No Remorse, No Fear