Ruin-A-Wish Foundation.

[Level 7 Dragon]

Under the light of the setting Alpha Cetari sun you gaze into the milky way, thanking the forces that made you a pioneer and cursing yourself for becoming a hermit that would never see another human face again.

I wish humans put as much deductive thought and effort into politics and social engineering as they do into entertainment and their personal lives.

 

[UltraDeth]

Thinking politics takes up all their time and they have no focus for enjoyable things.

I wish the universe didn't have to end.

 

[UltraDeth]

You're allergic to all dairy products.

I wish to be the Hero everybody needs.

 

[Level 7 Dragon]

Cheese now blockades the lower parts of the digestive system, preventing any matter, liquid or gas from getting out of your body.

I wish for good healthcare to be universally available

 

[UltraDeth]

Screw you, too.

I wish meat wasn't fattening.

 

[Living_Brain]

It isn't-
-with proper exercise.

I wish gum could satisfy hunger

 

[UltraDeth]

But, it lacks proper vitamins and is very unhealthy.

I wish to be a saviour in a cursed land.

 

[Level 7 Dragon]

After saving their community, a preist stabs you in the back. The last things you remember is being carried towards a large cauldron. Perhaps, you should have thought think twice before traveling to tribes that have a habit of canibalizing their champions.

I wish people wern't racist.

 

[Drake the Dragonheart]

It takes an alien invasion to give people something else to direct their hatred at. Specism replaces racism.

I wish I could teach Kung Fu.

 

[Living_Brain]

It becomes too smart for you to comprehend, and you end up feeling like the Inception memes when that movie first came out.

I wish bosses didn't try to snivel their way out of paying out to their employees after half-going out of business

 

[UltraDeth]

The entire accounting departments commit mass suicide when stocks drop lower than 5%, this leads to drops in accounting jobs and a stock disaster.

I wish I could do my own stunts.

 

[Drake the Dragonheart]

Your first stunt is to jump into an active volcano.

I wish the Denver Broncos had won Super Bowl 50.

 

[UltraDeth]

Only to lose over the ensuing century, just like the Red Sox.

I wish good old Jim Ross would announce every good deed I accomplish.

 

[Level 7 Dragon]

Jim Ross now comments on every action you perform and potential consequences of said action on society at large, which leads to a state of solitude and deep contemplation of life.

I wish the user UltraDeth would go outside for a walk, take a breath of fresh air, meet a cute girl and invite her over for a date and stop going around forums replying to every single game thread.

 

[UltraDeth]

I don't go on every forum game. And I'm not sociable.

I wish I could get a free spare of everything I buy.

 

[Drake the Dragonheart]

Only to lose over the ensuing century, just like the Red Sox.

haha jokes on you, because the Broncos did win super bowl 50!

Granted, everything you buy is now super defective and the spare must be salvaged for spare parts to fix the original.

I wish NBC's football night in America would dump Carrie Underwood (the lyrics weren't the problem it was the talentless redneck you had "singing" them!) and she gains 20 pounds a week for the next 20 weeks.