Ruin-A-Wish Foundation.

[Living_Brain]

Granted, but it takes effect in 3 days.
I WISH for tropical weather.

 

[Hemlock]

Granted, have fun in 90 degree heat forever.
I wish for more wishes.

 

[NerfedFalcon]

Granted, but they can only be used to wish for corn.

I wish for America to turn communist.

 

[Hemlock]

Granted, Cuba becomes the most powerful nation in the world and is now a democracy.
I wish for a medium-well steak.

 

[Olas]

Granted, Cuba becomes the most powerful nation in the world and is now a democracy.
I wish for a medium-well steak.

Granted, one sewer rat steak coming up.

I wish for a pony.

 

[Dr.Susse]

Granted would you like it fried or baked.

I wish for more great crime drama.

 

[thesilentman]

Granted, hope you like a shitty example of a great crime drama.

I wish for better reflexes!

 

[username sucks]

Granted, you now have reflexes so fast you can move faster than sound. However, your body still cannot withstand such speeds so every move you make will tear you apart.

I wish I would stop procrastinating.

 

[Not G. Ivingname]

Granted! Now you are a workaholic.

And you work at a sewage treatment plant.

I wish for the ability to ruin wishes better.

 

[MrCollins]

Granted, but every time you try to post your ideas, you get ninja'd by something funnier.

I wish that the walls were made of cake.

 

[Hemlock]

Granted, I hoped you like Cinderblock Cake.

Recipe:
Equal Parts Flour, Sugar and Instant Cement

I wish for a pie.

 

[thesilentman]

Granted. Hope you have an immunity to AIDS!
[small]Yes, I failed Biology. I'm having fun, that's all that counts.[/small]

I wish for time travel to the past and future at will, but only for me.

 

[Hemlock]

Granted, you can only go a day in the future or the past.
I wish for instant cement.

 

[Redlin5_v1legacy]

Granted but you are standing in a pool of it up to your knees...

I wish for the code.

 

[thesilentman]

Granted. Nothing in the world accepts it by the way, so have fun using useless code!

I wish for a burst of inspiration to finish 5 AP assignments for tomorrow!

 

[DotSlash]

Granted. It's too distracting and you get nothing done.

I wish for a better phone.

 

[Jolly Co-operator]

Unfortunately, you won't be able to get any cell phone reception anywhere.

I wish my eyes were purple.

 

[Dr.Susse]

Granted! All hail Lelouch vi Britannia!
Also you get killed in the end of that anime sorry.....maybe......


I wish I had a better car.

 

[Jolly Co-operator]

Wish granted! You now have the finest car money can buy. It's a shame about those defective seat-belts and airbags . . . I'm sure you'll be fine.

I wish for a jar of peanut butter that never goes empty.

 

[Dead Seerius]

Granted, but it's filled with the 'peanut butter' found in Reese's Cups. (According to a recent Off-Topic thread, people don't seem to like it.)

I wish the snow here would melt.