Ruin-A-Wish Foundation.

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MetaKnight670

New member
Apr 3, 2011
534
0
0
Granted, but it causes a flood that engulfs your entire town/city/whatever.

I wish to be the very best, like no-one ever was.
 

Jolly Co-operator

A Heavy Sword
Mar 10, 2012
1,116
0
0
Wish granted, you are now the very best, like no one ever was. To catch them is your real test, and to train them is your cause. Unfortunately, you're already the best, so training them is meaningless, and your cause feels empty and unfulfilling.

I wish I could instantly clean my house with a snap of my fingers.
 

thesilentman

What this
Jun 14, 2012
4,512
0
0
Granted. Every time you need to activate that power, you lose a heart.

I wish for a giant mech with a drill that can pierce the heavens!
 

MetaKnight670

New member
Apr 3, 2011
534
0
0
Granted. The mech needs to stay plugged into an outlet at all times though, the cord is a foot long, and no extension cords work with it.

I wish to be able to read minds.
 

Jolly Co-operator

A Heavy Sword
Mar 10, 2012
1,116
0
0
Wish granted. You have no way to filter out the thoughts of people around you, and you always hear their most useless and annoying thoughts first.

I wish the world was like a Professor Layton game, and all my problems and disputes could be settled by solving puzzles. I also want his fancy hat.
 

Jolly Co-operator

A Heavy Sword
Mar 10, 2012
1,116
0
0
Granted. Your home has had all it's utilities shut off, and your name has been legally changed to "Happy". Emotionally speaking, you're quite miserable.

I wish the fruit in my house would never spoil.
 

thesilentman

What this
Jun 14, 2012
4,512
0
0
Granted. But the composition of the fruits make it acidic to your health and kill you if you even smell it.

I wish for a way to wake up the sheep.
 

WhyBotherToTry

New member
Jun 22, 2011
550
1
0
Granted, but now they never go back to sleep, and their ceaseless bleating echoes throughout your mind.

I wish I didn't have to get up early.
 

Hemlock

New member
Mar 4, 2013
160
0
0
Granted, I hope you like waking up 11:59 PM of the current day.
I wish for a fountain of hairballs.
 

Not G. Ivingname

New member
Nov 18, 2009
6,367
0
0
Granted. You can pick up from the White House, it's in the Oval Office. The Secret Service has some questions for you.

I wish for wishes that don't ruin themselves.
 

StormShaun

The Basement has been unleashed!
Feb 1, 2009
6,947
0
0
Granted, they don't ruin themselves for 5 seconds. Enjoy that happiness while you can.

I wish that I had an apple pie ... right next to me.
 

mParadox

Susurration
Sep 19, 2010
28,598
0
0
Country
Germany
Denied, because I don't know the rules of the game and also, RED IS DRUNK.

I wish I knew the rules of every game.
 

MetaKnight670

New member
Apr 3, 2011
534
0
0
Granted, but it is broken and only allows reality to be warped so that goats are the dominant species on Earth.

I wish I could travel to all the countries in the world.
 

Jolly Co-operator

A Heavy Sword
Mar 10, 2012
1,116
0
0
Granted. Coincidentally, all countries except for the one you're currently living in have colonized space . . . and they took their land with them (don't ask me how).

I wish Starbucks could brew a decent cup of plain black coffee (seriously, they can make all sorts of mixed drinks, but decent black coffee is somehow beyond them?!).
 

MetaKnight670

New member
Apr 3, 2011
534
0
0
Granted, but now you need a constant supply of coffee from Starbucks. This is because instead of needing air to live, you now need a constant supply of black coffee from Starbucks.

I wish I had an Iron Man suit of my very own.
 

thesilentman

What this
Jun 14, 2012
4,512
0
0
Granted. The suit has a personality that erases your own, making sure that you never live again.

I wish for some winnings in chess.
 

Redlin5_v1legacy

Better Red than Dead
Aug 5, 2009
48,834
0
0
Granted, you win a punch to the face for making your opponent angry.

I wish for more creative ways to ruin wishes.