Serial Killer 81: Post Apocalypse Survival (Cycle 4: Killer has been executed! SK 81 is over!)

[gritch]

[HEADING=2]tf2godz been executed! Begin cycle 2 murder phase![/HEADING] He had no role in life but has now obtained the role of Trickster. Woo hoo...

The Killer, Lawyer, Medic, and Spy roles may now activate.
[hr]

Spoiler: Chapter 2: Stupid is as Stupid does

[HEADING=3](d)[/HEADING]​

"You've all lost your minds!" a fourth comrade interjects before tossing the map and table to the ground. "Have you not seen the horror these porno have brought to us! One of our own has taken his own life! We've angered the Almighty! We must beg for his forgiveness and cleanse ourselves of this filth! A fire! Burn the porno! And maybe some of our excess food while we're at it...

Another comrade joins in, "Yes burn it! Burn the porno! Burn the porno!" Others quickly join in the chant and soon the whole crowd has wipped itself into a frenzy chanting in unison.

Burn the porno? What's wrong with everyone? Why would they want to do that?

A triceratops steps forward in defiance - finally someone with a bit of reason! Hopefully others will join in and -

"INFIDEL!"

The sound of a single gunshot echos through the chamber. [user]tf2godz[/user] lies lifeless in front of the crowd - bits of his brains splattered on your boots. The sound of the gunshot hangs in the air as everyone stands in silence before slowly fading away. Someone raises a lighter and lights it with a resounding click.

"A fire!" they shout, tossing the small flame onto [user]tf2godz[/user]'s corpse. It immediately catches flame.

"A fire! A fire!" Before you have time to react someone from behind you grabs your back pack and empties its contents onto the floor. "Burn it!" They grab a handful of your precious porno and throw it onto the burning corpse. Before long everyone else has begun to follow suit and a raging inferno soon engulfs what was once [user]tf2god[/user]'s corpse. In the confusion you just manage to swipe your most precious magazine. You tuck it safely inside your shirt.

"All praise the porno god! ALL PRAISE THE GOD OF PORN!"

Holy shit! These people are crazy!

All the porn could've been of Hillary Clinton so there's that.

I wouldn't do that to you guys. There's some of Jeb Bush too.

 

[The Raw Shark]

[HEADING=2]tf2godz been executed! Begin cycle 2 murder phase![/HEADING] He had no role in life but has now obtained the role of Trickster. Woo hoo...

The Killer, Lawyer, and Spy roles may now activate.
[hr]

Spoiler: Chapter 2: Stupid is as Stupid does

[HEADING=3](d)[/HEADING]​

"You've all lost your minds!" a fourth comrade interjects before tossing the map and table to the ground. "Have you not seen the horror these porno have brought to us! One of our own has taken his own life! We've angered the Almighty! We must beg for his forgiveness and cleanse ourselves of this filth! A fire! Burn the porno! And maybe some of our excess food while we're at it...

Another comrade joins in, "Yes burn it! Burn the porno! Burn the porno!" Others quickly join in the chant and soon the whole crowd has wipped itself into a frenzy chanting in unison.

Burn the porno? What's wrong with everyone? Why would they want to do that?

A triceratops steps forward in defiance - finally someone with a bit of reason! Hopefully others will join in and -

"INFIDEL!"

The sound of a single gunshot echos through the chamber. [user]tf2godz[/user] lies lifeless in front of the crowd - bits of his brains splattered on your boots. The sound of the gunshot hangs in the air as everyone stands in silence before slowly fading away. Someone raises a lighter and lights it with a resounding click.

"A fire!" they shout, tossing the small flame onto [user]tf2godz[/user]'s corpse. It immediately catches flame.

"A fire! A fire!" Before you have time to react someone from behind you grabs your back pack and empties its contents onto the floor. "Burn it!" They grab a handful of your precious porno and throw it onto the burning corpse. Before long everyone else has begun to follow suit and a raging inferno soon engulfs what was once [user]tf2god[/user]'s corpse. In the confusion you just manage to swipe your most precious magazine. You tuck it safely inside your shirt.

"All praise the porno god! ALL PRAISE THE GOD OF PORN!"

Holy shit! These people are crazy!

All the porn could've been of Hillary Clinton so there's that.

I wouldn't do that to you guys. There's some of Jeb Bush too.

Good Jesus Christ that went to hell in a handbasket within fucking minutes. Oh well.....

-Frantically clutches salvaged porno of Commander Shepard-

Don't worry babe, I got you.....

 

[Thunderous Cacophony]

I knew I shouldn't have been covering for my sick colleague. You cover a few extra shifts and people find a way to make the apocalypse worse.

 

[Fat Hippo]

Yay, I'm alive, now we wait for the Spy to do his thing. I hope he's not inactive...

 

[EvilRoy]

Yay, I'm alive, now we wait for the Spy to do his thing. I hope he's not inactive...

Inactive or not, I don't trust spies. The never really are on your side you know.

 

[BeerTent]

*Yaawwhhn~*

Ooph.. So, what's up?

 

[gritch]

[HEADING=2]Someone has been murdered! Check your inboxes![/HEADING]Lawyer and Spy abilities will now resolve.[hr]Yep definitely dead...

 

[BeerTent]

I'm pretty sure if we don't work together, it's going to end up like that one Round where [user]BeerTent[/user] won by a landslide.
Let's not repeat that again shall we?

For the record, I have NUMEROUS reports of people GREATLY enjoying my Carnival Tent full of liquor. Just because you pussies couldn't handle the booze and spilled your guts everywhere, doesn't mean me winning is a bad thing.

Lets continue the tradition of me winning every game. The problem is this, do we know anything? Who can I trust? Honestly, I don't know. There's NPC's and barely fappable porn this time around...

Where's Wary? I need a new Bottom *****.

 

[Wary Wolf]

@BeerTent

I aim to please.

Spoiler: Your Bottom ***** is now...

I'm sure it's somebody's fetish.

 

[Wary Wolf]

The Viral Wolf had but one reason to allow the humans he despised so much to live. The only thing he enjoyed more than hating humans was the hunt.

"If I let them live for now they will flee their little hole like the pathetic prey animals they are and will be an enjoyable distraction from all this endless wasteland." Was his reasoning.

He figured that there were three likely locations the foolish humans might flee to. 1. A nearby town, 2. A nearby weapons cache or 3. The closest vault.

Gathering together two other creations of the Glorious Gritch King, he set off for the hunt...

Spoiler: At the nearest town...

The massive robot majestically strode across the wasteland. It's footsteps powerful and rhythmic. A fierce sense of purpose set into it's core programming. Before it stood a tiny tin town. It began calculating the odds of victory if it was to attack.

"0% CHANCE OF COMMUNIST VICTORY! KAWAI WILL BE RESTORED!" stated the robot with authority. "I AM MOE PRIME! KAWAI IS THE AMERICAIN WAY!"

​

The inhabitants of the tiny town stood awestruck at the massive robot. Just looking at it inspired them to become more than plebs eking out a meagre existence in their ramshackle slums they had built.


"COMMUNISTS DETECTED! BETTER DEAD THAN TO HAVE NO WAIFU!"

From the robot's eyes a great pulse of blue light swept across the town, decimating half the population in an instant. With this Moe Prime lifted an arm and fired a lone projectile straight into the middle of the town. The resulting explosion took out any remaining survivors and levelled the entire town.


"OBJECTIVE COMPLETE! ALL POWER TO AMERICA! A WAIFU FOR EVERY MAN IS THE AMERICAIN DREAM! MOE PRIME IS RETURNING TO BASE!"

Well, good thing for the survivors that they didn't go there...

Spoiler: At the nearby weapons cache

Viral Wolf jumped from his Enki gunman, dusting himself off. The only resistance he had encountered thus far was from some low-level raiders, who hardly posed a challenge. He sniffed the air, but smelled no more humans about. Regardless, he cautiously drew his cleaver and entered the weapons supply cache.

"Crowbars, rusty knives and a home made rifle made of glue and string?" questioned Viral as he took stock of the cache's inventory. "Surely there would be more in this place than this! This is hardly worth the hassle!"

Starting up his pip-boy, he began accessing the local database looking for any info on the weapon cache he had found.

Hey guys. I just went to the weapn place near the vault I started at, but all the weapons suck! I need better weapons! Help!

Quit playing fag. Uninstall the game. That will help.

I can't find Dogmeat either!

I assume that you are low level. Every time you find a new location, it spawns items according to your level. Usually this means that the first weapons cache you come across will be full of crap. However, pro players tend to avoid visiting these caches until they have passed level 72, as this is when the best loot is almost guaranteed to be spawned. Hope that helps!

"Huh..." Viral checks his pipboy.

LEVEL: 1
HP: 50
EQUIPPED: Viral's Cleaver
RADS: >9000

"Shit."

Nothing was good in there anyway...

Spoiler: At the nearest vault

The small gunman made it's way across the wasteland at breakneck speed. It's small stature hiding it's powerful destructive ability.

Within no time it reached the vault. Secure from nuclear weapons, but not this gunman's bunker-busting mega missiles! The gunman locked his missiles onto the Vault its fate was sealed!

"Gunman! Return to base immediately! You are in urgent need of an upgrade!"

It was The Gritch King! Those orders had to be obeyed! Powering down it's servos, the gunman spun 180 degrees and headed back to the Gritch King's city.

Promptly the gunman stood in the maintainence bay, awaiting the work that needed to be done. The Gritch King, in all of their glory strode towards the gunman, paintbrush in hand and began their work...

Well... I guess the other vault might have been safe to go to after all?


Climbing back into his gunman, Viral Wolf decided to survey the vault the humans were originally hiding in. Surely they would not be so stupid to remain there after being found?

On arrival Viral Wolf found black smoke billowing from the vault, indicating either its destruction or that the inhabitants were burning somewhat damp materials. Figuring the former, Viral Wolf shrugged, somewhat disappointed he didn't get the chance to kill the humans and returned back home.

 

[tippy2k2]

I'm pretty sure if we don't work together, it's going to end up like that one Round where [user]BeerTent[/user] won by a landslide.
Let's not repeat that again shall we?

That's just what the killer would want...

Although if I were the killer, shifting blame onto you is exactly what I would do!


I'm watching you...and watching me...watching you...

 

[Secondhand Revenant]

It was at this point that the Decapitated Centaur finally realized it was actually dead.

I was a normal old nothing of course

 

[The Raw Shark]

It was at this point that the Decapitated Centaur finally realized it was actually dead.

I was a normal old nothing of course

I'm pretty sure if we don't work together, it's going to end up like that one Round where [user]BeerTent[/user] won by a landslide.
Let's not repeat that again shall we?

That's just what the killer would want...

Although if I were the killer, shifting blame onto you is exactly what I would do!


I'm watching you...and watching me...watching you...

The Viral Wolf had but one reason to allow the humans he despised so much to live. The only thing he enjoyed more than hating humans was the hunt.

"If I let them live for now they will flee their little hole like the pathetic prey animals they are and will be an enjoyable distraction from all this endless wasteland." Was his reasoning.

He figured that there were three likely locations the foolish humans might flee to. 1. A nearby town, 2. A nearby weapons cache or 3. The closest vault.

Gathering together two other creations of the Glorious Gritch King, he set off for the hunt...

Spoiler: At the nearest town...

The massive robot majestically strode across the wasteland. It's footsteps powerful and rhythmic. A fierce sense of purpose set into it's core programming. Before it stood a tiny tin town. It began calculating the odds of victory if it was to attack.

"0% CHANCE OF COMMUNIST VICTORY! KAWAI WILL BE RESTORED!" stated the robot with authority. "I AM MOE PRIME! KAWAI IS THE AMERICAIN WAY!"

​

The inhabitants of the tiny town stood awestruck at the massive robot. Just looking at it inspired them to become more than plebs eking out a meagre existence in their ramshackle slums they had built.


"COMMUNISTS DETECTED! BETTER DEAD THAN TO HAVE NO WAIFU!"

From the robot's eyes a great pulse of blue light swept across the town, decimating half the population in an instant. With this Moe Prime lifted an arm and fired a lone projectile straight into the middle of the town. The resulting explosion took out any remaining survivors and levelled the entire town.


"OBJECTIVE COMPLETE! ALL POWER TO AMERICA! A WAIFU FOR EVERY MAN IS THE AMERICAIN DREAM! MOE PRIME IS RETURNING TO BASE!"

Well, good thing for the survivors that they didn't go there...

Spoiler: At the nearby weapons cache

Viral Wolf jumped from his Enki gunman, dusting himself off. The only resistance he had encountered thus far was from some low-level raiders, who hardly posed a challenge. He sniffed the air, but smelled no more humans about. Regardless, he cautiously drew his cleaver and entered the weapons supply cache.

"Crowbars, rusty knives and a home made rifle made of glue and string?" questioned Viral as he took stock of the cache's inventory. "Surely there would be more in this place than this! This is hardly worth the hassle!"

Starting up his pip-boy, he began accessing the local database looking for any info on the weapon cache he had found.

Hey guys. I just went to the weapn place near the vault I started at, but all the weapons suck! I need better weapons! Help!

Quit playing fag. Uninstall the game. That will help.

I can't find Dogmeat either!

I assume that you are low level. Every time you find a new location, it spawns items according to your level. Usually this means that the first weapons cache you come across will be full of crap. However, pro players tend to avoid visiting these caches until they have passed level 72, as this is when the best loot is almost guaranteed to be spawned. Hope that helps!

"Huh..." Viral checks his pipboy.

LEVEL: 1
HP: 50
EQUIPPED: Viral's Cleaver
RADS: >9000

"Shit."

Nothing was good in there anyway...

Spoiler: At the nearest vault

The small gunman made it's way across the wasteland at breakneck speed. It's small stature hiding it's powerful destructive ability.

Within no time it reached the vault. Secure from nuclear weapons, but not this gunman's bunker-busting mega missiles! The gunman locked his missiles onto the Vault its fate was sealed!

"Gunman! Return to base immediately! You are in urgent need of an upgrade!"

It was The Gritch King! Those orders had to be obeyed! Powering down it's servos, the gunman spun 180 degrees and headed back to the Gritch King's city.

Promptly the gunman stood in the maintainence bay, awaiting the work that needed to be done. The Gritch King, in all of their glory strode towards the gunman, paintbrush in hand and began their work...

Well... I guess the other vault might have been safe to go to after all?


Climbing back into his gunman, Viral Wolf decided to survey the vault the humans were originally hiding in. Surely they would not be so stupid to remain there after being found?

On arrival Viral Wolf found black smoke billowing from the vault, indicating either its destruction or that the inhabitants were burning somewhat damp materials. Figuring the former, Viral Wolf shrugged, somewhat disappointed he didn't get the chance to kill the humans and returned back home.

God damn it....

 

[Igor-Rowan]

That's just what the killer would want...

Although if I were the killer, shifting blame onto you is exactly what I would do!


I'm watching you...and watching me...watching you...

Patience, my friend. The killer is not going anywhere. Let's not do anything hasty alright?

 

[Jux]

That's just what the killer would want...

Although if I were the killer, shifting blame onto you is exactly what I would do!


I'm watching you...and watching me...watching you...

Patience, my friend. The killer is not going anywhere. Let's not do anything hasty alright?

J'accuse!

 

[Wary Wolf]

"Ohh goodie! I just found a decapitated centaur head! I will use it as a puppet!"

Spoiler: Behold my amazing ventriloquist act!

 

[JUMBO PALACE]

This thread makes me feel like I'm in the Twilight Zone

 

[gritch]

[HEADING=2]The Decapitated Centaur has been murdered! Begin the voting phase![/HEADING]

[user]The Decapitated Centaur[/user] is no longer with us. They no role and have now become a Trickster. Woo hoo!

The Arbiter and any Tricksters roles may activate now.

Everyone has until Tuesday March 28 22:00 EST to cast their votes.[hr]

Spoiler: Scenario 2

You slowly open your eyes. It's bright. A sleepy hand reaches to rub away remnants of sleep from your eyes.

Where am I? And where are my pants!

You rise up and take a quick look around you. Your fellow survivors are thrown about the large chamber in a similar state to you. Your stomach lets out an audible groan.

I'm hungry... Where the hell did my pants go?

You carefully walk around the chamber, avoiding stepping on your slumbering comrades, in search of both your pants and your backpack. You find a discarded pair of pants. A quick examination reveals an odd odorous stain by the the crotch. You place in back down. You'd rather go pants-less than wear whatever that is. You do finally find your backpack. You take out the meager amount of rations that managed to survive the previous night festivities and eat them. That's it for your food rations.

Slowly several other comrades rise up from their slumber. One approaches the nearby overturned table and sets it upright again. He then places the fallen map back on it again.

[HEADING=3](a)[/HEADING]​

"Well we've gone and done it now.", he shakes his head with confusion as he realizes the pair of pants he is currently wearing as a hat. "We went and burned most of our rations. We need to resupply now more than ever! We should follow the initial plan and resupply in the nearby now right now.

[HEADING=3](b)[/HEADING]​

Another comrades rises up, he swiftly grabs the pants off the first comrades head and puts them on. "I agree with my comrade - we definitely need to resupply but a damn town's going to be swarming with all sorts of dangerous types. Safer if we gathered food for ourselves. There was a large nature reserve not far from here. We can probably make do hunting and fishing for our own food. I was a boy scout after all."

[HEADING=3](c)[/HEADING]​

A third comrade stumbles upon the table - his pants nowhere in sight. "We should still try to meet up with other bunker. There's strength in numbers and they might have spare resources we desperate need now. And maybe some spare pants too." he goes to end his line by adjusting his glasses only to discover that those too have gone missing.

[HEADING=3](d)[/HEADING]​

A final comrade rises from his slumber. He dons the pair of odorous pants you noticed earlier without a moment's hesitation. "My eyes have been opened! Ecstasy! Euphoria as I've never experienced before! Truly this was the blessing of his Omnipotence! We've been given a task! We must cleanse the world of its porno! In this, our holy crusade, we -" at this he stops for vomit onto his crotch before laying back down on the ground.

You still can't find your pants.

 

[gritch]

... That's Cerea from Monster Musume. Was not expecting anyone here to know her unless you didn't actually know who she was.

That show seemed pretty popular and it wasn't that long ago that it aired. I would be more surprised if more people didn't recognize her.

 

[Thunderous Cacophony]

"Ohh goodie! I just found a decapitated centaur head! I will use it as a puppet!"

Spoiler: Behold my amazing ventriloquist act!

You're lucky you're an NPC, or I'd defend the honour of best girl and execute you so hard.