Share Your Shower Thoughts

[Baffle]

I've heard this thing where, when a man and a woman (this rule ignores same-sex couples apparently) are walking by the roadside (on a path/sidewalk), the man should always walk on road side of the path in case a car mounts the kerb and he needs to protect his ladyfriend with his body.

Now, obviously it's a generally sexist premise, but are there that many human bodies that would slow down the movement of a car? I was in a low-speed accident a few months ago when someone went into the side of me at about 10 mph, and he still moved me significantly sideways (and fucked up my car) and my car weighs about 1.5 tonnes (so about 20 times what I weigh). I feel both of us being crushed by a drink driver would not help. (I'm currently in negotiations with the missus (possibly misses) that she carry me everywhere on her shoulders, but we're currently at an impasse/Brexit).

 

[ObsidianJones_v1legacy]

Lol, I?m being purposefully ?mean? for the sheer absurdity of it; of course these women don?t bother me THAT much, but it IS a valid, easily dismissible nuisance. I?ve always noticed it, but It?s happened a LOT this week at work, so in the shower this morning, I was thinking of ways to avoid it by parking on the lower level and taking the elevator instead of the second level and taking the stairs, then it hit me: why am I the one trying to fix the situation?!? A female friend of mine literally wears heels everywhere and you?d think she was in a pare of Nikes. She wore them on a hike we took and showed off her [apparently] unique skill by traverse a creek on its mossy rocks and followed THAT up by taking the stairs to the top of Chimney Rock [https://www.chimneyrockpark.com/view_trail/chimney-rock/] without breaking a sweat (I was about to die myself; that many stairs is a crime against humanity.) So I KNOW it can be done, and ever since, I look at other women and their stumbling uncertainty and think ?amateurs.?

I feel the overwhelming need to express my 'maleness' as it were in appreciation of of such an event. But I can not trust myself to say it tactfully in a way that will be respectful, and cool enough that I didn't feel the need to punch myself in the face. I shall deluge this statement with neutral words and descriptors as a way to have expressed anything at all.

Thank you for your time.

You?re not alone. Often I?m the proverbial willow in the wind, too, conceding in the face of the arrogant aloofness of others who act without consideration for other people, i.e.: stepping aside when groups of people walking down the sidewalk shoulder-to-shoulder creating an impenetrable wall self-importance, letting the old ladies who cut me in line at the store because ?Oh! [they] didn?t see me? off with a pass and my place in line, etc. So, yeah, while my initial ?high heels on the stairs? was pretty specific, I can agree it?s generally the willful lack of reciprocity of basic human patience and decency on display by so many other. If you?re going to take your sweet time on the stairs and spare your neck, be aware of the line of ?traffic? building up behind you and your fashion choice.

What can I say, buddy; it?s our silence and patience that keeps the gears of a semi-civil society greased and turning. The day we stand up and start pushing old ladies down and slapping cell phones out of the hands of people who can?t step out of the walkway long enough to read a text? Chaos.

Here's something from one of my old jobs at a call center. It was filled with kids in school or Middle Aged people trying to make some extra money on the phones. But there was only one person of advanced age. Her name was Ruthie, and every person of color called her Miss Ruthie.

Because she came from the South and you knew it. She had that way about her. She seen it all and she had no time for your mess. She never said one cross word to any of us, and we were damn sure not going to let anyone speak ill of her (not that anyone wanted to). Because she had that air about her that you were taught to respect by your grandparents. That you hold the door open for, or offer to make tea for if you were getting something in the breakroom.

I love that type of Respect. It's something I treasure.

But it's either all kids are being raised by TV, video games, or now social influencers which makes that a thing of the past. I was born before the Social Media craze, so I don't know how kids are being raised now. But my world was my family. I couldn't go to the internet and have a ton of people tell me "Dude, whatever, my dad says the same thing, tell him off".

Who I talked to was controlled by my family, when I went out was controlled by my family, what I did or what I saw was controlled by my family. My family was there to put the fear of God in me. In terms of I'd meet Him real soon if I kept acting up. So I never did.

It used to be that your family could control your upbringing to a certain point. But now I think they can't. A handful of people can not block out the instant access of the internet. Hell, I read a great article about that a little while ago.

A mother's warning: If you have white teen sons, listen up... [https://www.cnn.com/2019/10/22/us/california-mother-warning-white-supremacists-soh/index.html]

It's about how even in a home that was raised without prejudice, prejudice is now able to reach out to everyone via the power of the internet.

In short... it feels like the entire young world has the idea that they shouldn't care about what's directly around them because they are living what they consider their 'real lives' in the Social Media world.

I think I went off on a rant. I'm not editing any more. This is a officially a shower thought. You Can't Prove That It Wasn't!

Sidebar, I think a lot of people need Mr. Rogers.

I've heard this thing where, when a man and a woman (this rule ignores same-sex couples apparently) are walking by the roadside (on a path/sidewalk), the man should always walk on road side of the path in case a car mounts the kerb and he needs to protect his ladyfriend with his body.

Now, obviously it's a generally sexist premise, but are there that many human bodies that would slow down the movement of a car? I was in a low-speed accident a few months ago when someone went into the side of me at about 10 mph, and he still moved me significantly sideways (and fucked up my car) and my car weighs about 1.5 tonnes (so about 20 times what I weigh). I feel both of us being crushed by a drink driver would not help. (I'm currently in negotiations with the missus (possibly misses) that she carry me everywhere on her shoulders, but we're currently at an impasse/Brexit).

Oh, is that what that's about? I was always taught it was just in case some dirt or water comes from the road. The dude will get soaked and the woman will be fine.

Same as back in the day with Chamberpots. Just in case someone was emptying one out..

 

[Xprimentyl]

Snip

Here's something from one of my old jobs at a call center. It was filled with kids in school or Middle Aged people trying to make some extra money on the phones. But there was only one person of advanced age. Her name was Ruthie, and every person of color called her Miss Ruthie.

Because she came from the South and you knew it. She had that way about her. She seen it all and she had no time for your mess. She never said one cross word to any of us, and we were damn sure not going to let anyone speak ill of her (not that anyone wanted to). Because she had that air about her that you were taught to respect by your grandparents. That you hold the door open for, or offer to make tea for if you were getting something in the breakroom.

I love that type of Respect. It's something I treasure.

But it's either all kids are being raised by TV, video games, or now social influencers which makes that a thing of the past. I was born before the Social Media craze, so I don't know how kids are being raised now. But my world was my family. I couldn't go to the internet and have a ton of people tell me "Dude, whatever, my dad says the same thing, tell him off".

Who I talked to was controlled by my family, when I went out was controlled by my family, what I did or what I saw was controlled by my family. My family was there to put the fear of God in me. In terms of I'd meet Him real soon if I kept acting up. So I never did.

It used to be that your family could control your upbringing to a certain point. But now I think they can't. A handful of people can not block out the instant access of the internet. Hell, I read a great article about that a little while ago.

A mother's warning: If you have white teen sons, listen up... [https://www.cnn.com/2019/10/22/us/california-mother-warning-white-supremacists-soh/index.html]

It's about how even in a home that was raised without prejudice, prejudice is now able to reach out to everyone via the power of the internet.

In short... it feels like the entire young world has the idea that they shouldn't care about what's directly around them because they are living what they consider their 'real lives' in the Social Media world.

I think I went off on a rant. I'm not editing any more. This is a officially a shower thought. You Can't Prove That It Wasn't!

Sidebar, I think a lot of people need Mr. Rogers.

I grew up in a very family-centric environment as well, so I grew up with many a ?Miss Ruthie? of my own. In fact, to this day, I catch myself inadvertently dropping a ?Mr.? or ?Ms.? in front of elder acquaintances? names. It?s like I?m respectful at the genetic level!

But I don?t lay the blame on youth alone, though. The Internet, social media and the near constant access to those things affects people of all ages and stripes. Everyone has ?the world? in their hands nowadays, and with something that big staring you in the face 95% of your day, it?s easy to [dis]miss the literal world around you. I see it every day, people more engaged in their phones than each other, than even themselves. The phone HAS become reality for many people and the world we all share has become an inconsequence between them and that reality. That?s why that lady can stand in the middle of the aisle while looking at a recipe her phone with little to no regard for the fact you and I cannot get by; we don?t affect the fact that her phone is telling her find 3 ounces of ground chicken toenails; we don?t matter any more than that gust of wind that teased her hair on her way into the store. These same people are raising children with phones of their own?

Who has time for respect when you?ve got 12 Facebook notifications requesting your attention?

 

[happyninja42]

I've heard this thing where, when a man and a woman (this rule ignores same-sex couples apparently) are walking by the roadside (on a path/sidewalk), the man should always walk on road side of the path in case a car mounts the kerb and he needs to protect his ladyfriend with his body.

Now, obviously it's a generally sexist premise, but are there that many human bodies that would slow down the movement of a car? I was in a low-speed accident a few months ago when someone went into the side of me at about 10 mph, and he still moved me significantly sideways (and fucked up my car) and my car weighs about 1.5 tonnes (so about 20 times what I weigh). I feel both of us being crushed by a drink driver would not help. (I'm currently in negotiations with the missus (possibly misses) that she carry me everywhere on her shoulders, but we're currently at an impasse/Brexit).

Oh, is that what that's about? I was always taught it was just in case some dirt or water comes from the road. The dude will get soaked and the woman will be fine.

Same as back in the day with Chamberpots. Just in case someone was emptying one out..

It's a bit of both really. The thinking was the person closest to the road, is more likely to die, but also would be more likely to push the other person (the woman in this example) away from the path of the runaway vehicle. It's not really assuming the car is completely up on the sidewalk, and thus plow into both, but more of a veering off to the side kind of thing.

Also it's the "she's less likely to get dirty due to splash" as well. Both reasons are why it was tradition to do so.

 

[happyninja42]

What actually annoys me are people who stop in the middle of the aisle when they are looking for something at the supermarket. Just in mid-stride with their cart, blocking the aisle.

Anytime I want to look for something, I pull myself to the opposite side of what I'm looking for and try to not get in anyone's way.

I usually keep the cart on the same side as me, and just move it down a few feet from where I am looking. That way there is an entire side that doesn't mean people have to move close to me, or my cart, to get by.

 

[ObsidianJones_v1legacy]

Shower Thought: When did people first mixed up being a jerk with being honest? Like, I'm very honest. But I do it in a respectful way. If you're respectful, are you less honest? Why do people think that the only way you can be true is if you're making someone angry or treating someone like a lesser? That's being confrontational.

It's a bit of both really. The thinking was the person closest to the road, is more likely to die, but also would be more likely to push the other person (the woman in this example) away from the path of the runaway vehicle. It's not really assuming the car is completely up on the sidewalk, and thus plow into both, but more of a veering off to the side kind of thing.

Also it's the "she's less likely to get dirty due to splash" as well. Both reasons are why it was tradition to do so.

And we've all learned something today!

 

[Johnny Novgorod]

Was just trying to remember in the shower the name of the song that plays in Kingdom Hearts 1 when fighting in the final world.

 

[happyninja42]

Stardust was a really fun, enjoyable movie, that I couldn't actually think of anything I disliked about it. And Skypirate Robert De Niro was just fantastic. Huh, I should watch that film again.

 

[Xprimentyl]

Shower Thought: When did people first mixed up being a jerk with being honest? Like, I'm very honest. But I do it in a respectful way. If you're respectful, are you less honest? Why do people think that the only way you can be true is if you're making someone angry or treating someone like a lesser? That's being confrontational.

I don?t think anyone (of consequence) mixes up honesty with being a jerk. ?Honesty? has a generally positive connotation, but the fact is, like any tool, its disposition is heavily dependent on how it?s used and the intention of the user. People who preempt what they?re about to say with ?I?m just being honest when I say?? or ?All due respect, but?? know what they?re about to say is something the other person doesn?t want or won?t like to hear, and they think qualifying it as an ?honest? or ?respectful? statement removes any culpability on their part on how it?s inevitably received? which it doesn?t; only ?jerks? think that way. I could tell a lady that I ?honestly? don?t like the smell of her perfume, but if my opinion wasn?t expressly solicited, I?m just being a jerk. But if she asks me expressly how I like the smell, I can respectfully offer that I personally do not enjoy it. Same honest sentiment, but proper time and context makes all the difference.

Before one says ANYTHING that might potentially be taken the wrong way, one needs to run it through this simple, 3-step vetting process: 1.) Is it true? 2.) Is it necessary? And 3.) Is it kind? (I forget where I heard that, but it resonated with me.) It?s not a hard rule, but if what you?re wanting to say doesn?t pass the test on all three points to the affirmative (in descending order of importance 1-3,) then you probably shouldn?t say it and can largely avoid that ambiguous broad area between honesty and jerkiness.

 

[happyninja42]

Shower Thought: When did people first mixed up being a jerk with being honest? Like, I'm very honest. But I do it in a respectful way. If you're respectful, are you less honest? Why do people think that the only way you can be true is if you're making someone angry or treating someone like a lesser? That's being confrontational.

I don?t think anyone (of consequence) mixes up honesty with being a jerk. ?Honesty? has a generally positive connotation, but the fact is, like any tool, its disposition is heavily dependent on how it?s used and the intention of the user. People who preempt what they?re about to say with ?I?m just being honest when I say?? or ?All due respect, but?? know what they?re about to say is something the other person doesn?t want or won?t like to hear, and they think qualifying it as an ?honest? or ?respectful? statement removes any culpability on their part on how it?s inevitably received? which it doesn?t; only ?jerks? think that way. I could tell a lady that I ?honestly? don?t like the smell of her perfume, but if my opinion wasn?t expressly solicited, I?m just being a jerk. But if she asks me expressly how I like the smell, I can respectfully offer that I personally do not enjoy it. Same honest sentiment, but proper time and context makes all the difference.

Before one says ANYTHING that might potentially be taken the wrong way, one needs to run it through this simple, 3-step vetting process: 1.) Is it true? 2.) Is it necessary? And 3.) Is it kind? (I forget where I heard that, but it resonated with me.) It?s not a hard rule, but if what you?re wanting to say doesn?t pass the test on all three points to the affirmative (in descending order of importance 1-3,) then you probably shouldn?t say it and can largely avoid that ambiguous broad area between honesty and jerkiness.

I think he's referring to characters like House and Rick from Rick and Morty. Who substitute having decency and simple manners, with blunt honesty, or their understanding of it anyway. Using it as a crutch to prop up their spiteful existence as "I'm just telling it like it is! If you don't like it, then fuck you!" Kind of attitude, which is sadly pretty popular in entertainment, as evidenced by characters like Rick and House being as popular as they are.

 

[ObsidianJones_v1legacy]

I don?t think anyone (of consequence) mixes up honesty with being a jerk. ?Honesty? has a generally positive connotation, but the fact is, like any tool, its disposition is heavily dependent on how it?s used and the intention of the user. People who preempt what they?re about to say with ?I?m just being honest when I say?? or ?All due respect, but?? know what they?re about to say is something the other person doesn?t want or won?t like to hear, and they think qualifying it as an ?honest? or ?respectful? statement removes any culpability on their part on how it?s inevitably received? which it doesn?t; only ?jerks? think that way. I could tell a lady that I ?honestly? don?t like the smell of her perfume, but if my opinion wasn?t expressly solicited, I?m just being a jerk. But if she asks me expressly how I like the smell, I can respectfully offer that I personally do not enjoy it. Same honest sentiment, but proper time and context makes all the difference.

Before one says ANYTHING that might potentially be taken the wrong way, one needs to run it through this simple, 3-step vetting process: 1.) Is it true? 2.) Is it necessary? And 3.) Is it kind? (I forget where I heard that, but it resonated with me.) It?s not a hard rule, but if what you?re wanting to say doesn?t pass the test on all three points to the affirmative (in descending order of importance 1-3,) then you probably shouldn?t say it and can largely avoid that ambiguous broad area between honesty and jerkiness.

I think he's referring to characters like House and Rick from Rick and Morty. Who substitute having decency and simple manners, with blunt honesty, or their understanding of it anyway. Using it as a crutch to prop up their spiteful existence as "I'm just telling it like it is! If you don't like it, then fuck you!" Kind of attitude, which is sadly pretty popular in entertainment, as evidenced by characters like Rick and House being as popular as they are.

No. 'real' [https://youtu.be/tl7YNHYfx3Y?t=140] people do it too. You can stop watching after Amanda Seales finishes her point. Or continue. Because It's Aba and Preach.

By the way, I love Aba and Preach.

 

[Seanchaidh]

Tassadar did it better than Luke Skywalker.

 

[ObsidianJones_v1legacy]

So, my friend loves to tell me about her dating blues. She is about to dump this guy that she hasn't been going out with yet, but is frustrated that he's not picking up on her clues. Said clues are her arm touches and inviting him to do things out and whatever. She's upset that he's so clueless.

I asked her what is clueless about that. She said she's obviously flirting with him. I ask how is that obivous, because women do that to me all the time. And a lot of these women are freaking married (a good deal to friends of mine), so I know they aren't interested. She said that she doesn't do this with other guys, and if he observed her, he would know that this is different.

I paused a while. Let her own words sink in for a moment before I said "If your methods take careful study of your character with multiple people over a given amount of time, your flirting isn't obvious. It needs a Private Investigator."

And bonus! She told the other females in my old group to never come to me with this stuff again. So winning all around!

 

[happyninja42]

So, my friend loves to tell me about her dating blues. She is about to dump this guy that she hasn't been going out with yet, but is frustrated that he's not picking up on her clues. Said clues are her arm touches and inviting him to do things out and whatever. She's upset that he's so clueless.

I asked her what is clueless about that. She said she's obviously flirting with him. I ask how is that obivous, because women do that to me all the time. And a lot of these women are freaking married (a good deal to friends of mine), so I know they aren't interested. She said that she doesn't do this with other guys, and if he observed her, he would know that this is different.

I paused a while. Let her own words sink in for a moment before I said "If your methods take careful study of your character with multiple people over a given amount of time, your flirting isn't obvious. It needs a Private Investigator."

And bonus! She told the other females in my old group to never come to me with this stuff again. So winning all around!

Yeah it's rather funny how clueless women are on this front. They intentionally code behavior to be neutral in intent, so they can back out if they don't want to be called out on flirting with someone if it's socially embarrassing for them. But then assume you know what their intent is in their head. I've actually discussed this with several female friends of mine, and they all confirmed it's why they do it. So if they put out that little flirt feeler, and someone calls them out, they can be like "oh no! I wasn't FLIRTING with him! I just touched his arm because he told a funny joke! TOTES not flirting!" *actually 100% was flirting*

I had this happen with a girl I knew back in highschool. Bumped into her several years, well into my 30s, and she commented about how I was oblivious to her OBVIOUS flirting in highschool. I asked her what specifically she was talking about. "Well I would hug you every time I saw you!" And I was like "....girl, I hugged like, 8 girls a day during my rotations at school. Most of my friends were female, and we would greet each other with hugs. Why in the hell should I assume YOUR hug was sexual interest? In the middle of all the other hugs I was getting?"

She was a very silly lady.

 

[EvilRoy]

Shower Thought: When did people first mixed up being a jerk with being honest? Like, I'm very honest. But I do it in a respectful way. If you're respectful, are you less honest? Why do people think that the only way you can be true is if you're making someone angry or treating someone like a lesser? That's being confrontational.

I don?t think anyone (of consequence) mixes up honesty with being a jerk. ?Honesty? has a generally positive connotation, but the fact is, like any tool, its disposition is heavily dependent on how it?s used and the intention of the user. People who preempt what they?re about to say with ?I?m just being honest when I say?? or ?All due respect, but?? know what they?re about to say is something the other person doesn?t want or won?t like to hear, and they think qualifying it as an ?honest? or ?respectful? statement removes any culpability on their part on how it?s inevitably received? which it doesn?t; only ?jerks? think that way. I could tell a lady that I ?honestly? don?t like the smell of her perfume, but if my opinion wasn?t expressly solicited, I?m just being a jerk. But if she asks me expressly how I like the smell, I can respectfully offer that I personally do not enjoy it. Same honest sentiment, but proper time and context makes all the difference.

Before one says ANYTHING that might potentially be taken the wrong way, one needs to run it through this simple, 3-step vetting process: 1.) Is it true? 2.) Is it necessary? And 3.) Is it kind? (I forget where I heard that, but it resonated with me.) It?s not a hard rule, but if what you?re wanting to say doesn?t pass the test on all three points to the affirmative (in descending order of importance 1-3,) then you probably shouldn?t say it and can largely avoid that ambiguous broad area between honesty and jerkiness.

I think he's referring to characters like House and Rick from Rick and Morty. Who substitute having decency and simple manners, with blunt honesty, or their understanding of it anyway. Using it as a crutch to prop up their spiteful existence as "I'm just telling it like it is! If you don't like it, then fuck you!" Kind of attitude, which is sadly pretty popular in entertainment, as evidenced by characters like Rick and House being as popular as they are.

I started thinking "why would he say Rick from Rick and Morty but not House from his show". So House from House and Rick and Morty, from Rick and Morty, are these characters that... aaaah that was a sensible chuckle.

My most recent thought: If I hate formal events, and I hate social climbing, why am I using social currency as an excuse for attending a formal event that I don't want to attend, and nobody who I answer to or particularly like has respect for the event.

In totally unrelated news I'm skipping our "black tie" Christmas party.

 

[TheMysteriousGX]

If Inklings and Octolings dissolve instantly in water, but love melons, citrus fruit, and juice, then either the fruit is ink based as well or liquid's lethality is dramatically overblown.

Considering my youtube recommendations haven't been flooded with nonsense, Sakurai's joke (or his translation teams joke) about why Mai isn't showing in Smash Ultimate was a masterstroke. Weird how the nerds who produced hours of videos about how ZS Samus and Bayonetta were censored are using those character's sexiness as a what-about-ism though.

If Rise of the Skywalker ends up having Palpatine's clone or force ghost manipulating events from the background, that would be the most EU shit ever.

 

[ObsidianJones_v1legacy]

So, last night I went to Wegmans to get a pizza and some ginger-ale because I didn't feel like having my left-overs.

The cashier was extra chatty with me, so my personal trainer instincts kicked in so I could engage her (I used to be horrible talking to people since I'm an introvert).

She asked me I had big plans for Friday night. My actual plans were Bloodborne and pizza, but I just said 'nothing in particular'.

So she said "So you're out here looking all Danger Sexy for no reason at all?"

I literally do not remember how I fumbled out a response. I'm not sure I did. All I remember was saying have a great night and trying not to walk too quickly away.

I didn't know there was a phrase of 'danger sexy'. I'm not a hundred percent sure what that means. But I can never go back there, right? Like, that's for sure.

 

[Hawki]

My shower thought - what if you bathed rather than showered? Would it still count?

 

[BrawlMan]

So, last night I went to Wegmans to get a pizza and some ginger-ale because I didn't feel like having my left-overs.

The cashier was extra chatty with me, so my personal trainer instincts kicked in so I could engage her (I used to be horrible talking to people since I'm an introvert).

She asked me I had big plans for Friday night. My actual plans were Bloodborne and pizza, but I just said 'nothing in particular'.

So she said "So you're out here looking all Danger Sexy for no reason at all?"

I literally do not remember how I fumbled out a response. I'm not sure I did. All I remember was saying have a great night and trying not to walk too quickly away.

I didn't know there was a phrase of 'danger sexy'. I'm not a hundred percent sure what that means. But I can never go back there, right? Like, that's for sure.

If it were me, I would have been mostly truthful depending on the situation. I never heard of the danger sexy phrase, but I would have rolled with it out of amusement. My brother would have even more outrageous response if he were there. You can go back to the pizza place. Odds are she won't remember or might have different shift. Just be calm and have fun with it. Play it cool.

My shower thought - what if you bathed rather than showered? Would it still count?

Yes. I put thoughts down when I wasn't even bathing.

 

[ObsidianJones_v1legacy]

So, Hey, it's Obsidian Jones here. I just wanted to touch base with everyone since I almost died driving to work today.

It's the winter season in North America. We think a lot about our snow tires and what not. I'm going to suggest that you actually start looking at your hood. Cold can lead to metal stress and fatigue. And finding out that can occur while barreling down a highway during pre-rush hour at 65 mph isn't that fun.

It might show that you keep cool under pressure, though. That's always a good thing.