So, since sexuality is a spectrum, at what point of the "straight/bi" line does one start being good at sex?It probably sounds like I'm joking. I'm not. Being bad at sex is straight culture.
So, since sexuality is a spectrum, at what point of the "straight/bi" line does one start being good at sex?It probably sounds like I'm joking. I'm not. Being bad at sex is straight culture.
I agree with this. There are also things beyond what you can know on a surface level that can be deal-breakers.I had this debate earlier with a group of friends and the main takeaway was that most of us, all men who have been almost exclusively in relationships with women, consider it a premature decision to simply disregards so large a part of the general population as potential partners. While we typically don't seek out men as partners we also have other preferences when it comes to approaching a potential partner, factors such as appearance and presumed interests.
But here I disagree because there are perfectly valid reasons to categorically exclude transpeople from one's dating pool. Maybe you have none of those, cool, but other people sure do: fertility, mental issues, medicalization, transition itself, body issues, history, and what others think of you.To me saying "I'd never date a transperson" seems on the level of saying "I would never date someone with red hair", and it should be regarded as such, by both sides of the aisle. The intolerant should consider that it is a moronic statement and a generalization that reinforces some harmful tendencies in society. And the hyper-tolerant, should consider that it is a stupid preference based on preconceptions and while everyone might not be willing to open their minds some will.
This isn't possible in the world we live in. No transperson is like a cisperson except the sexual organs. There are differences and they can be unreconcilable.One of the fellows I talked with phrased it like this. "If you met someone who was, by all standards your perfect partner, appearance, personality, interests, everything except the sexual organs, wouldn't you be pretty stupid to reject the possibility of a perfect relationship?"
I have no problem taking their word for it. And they didn't even say all straight people are bad at sex. Also I'm a heteronormative person so to me anything outside that is deviant behavior.All I said was I thought it was bigoted to say all straight people are bad at sex, and when Terminal Blue said in their experience straight sex is bad sex that that sounds like a bad sexual experience. Terminal blue admits as such.
"Being bad at sex is straight culture."And they didn't even say all straight people are bad at sex.
Yes? That's not the same. Every straight person doesn't embody 100% of straight culture. edit. You know like not all Italians like pasta (never met one that didn't but I've only met like 30 million Italians)."Being bad at sex is straight culture."
Uuhh...
*Looks at the people getting banned on twitter for threatening to kill people over it*And like most satire made by people who's ego outstrips their intelligence, its failed at being satire and just makes them look like fucking morons.
Oh no don't you see that's TikTok helping to create a safe space and prevent cyberbullying ./sNot surprised they're on TikTok. As I recall, that's an app than blocks people who are ugly, overweight, have deformities, severe scars, etc. from appearing on their high-trending lists.
A few years back I think on youtube's Breadtube community.Wait what? If someone doesn't want to have sex with a trans person, they're transphobic? When did that become a thing?! So like if a lesbian doesn't want to sleep with a transfemale who still has a penis, she's transphobic? I don't want to sleep with anyone, male or female, that has a penis, because I'm not attracted to that, am I transphobic? Jeez whatever happened to just everyone is entitled to say no, and they're sexuality is their own business?
Depends who you ask on that first oneSo all hetero-sex is rape?
And who is being raped, the man or the woman, or both?
And would this mean all heterosexuals are actually lbtq?
That's...horseshit? It might be bullshit, but I'm pretty sure its horseshit. Saying something is a culture implies the overwhelming majority, if not all, adhere to it. That's what makes it a culture.Yes? That's not the same. Every straight person doesn't embody 100% of straight culture. edit. You know like not all Italians like pasta (never met one that didn't but I've only met like 30 million Italians).
Nope, because I'm really, really not interested in penis. And that's the thing: you can compare it to being a redhead, and my counter is that hair can be dyed, a penis cannot really stop being a penis, unless you go through with something like a Vaginoplasty. And I'm really, really not interested in one of those, either."If you met someone who was, by all standards your perfect partner, appearance, personality, interests, everything except the sexual organs, wouldn't you be pretty stupid to reject the possibility of a perfect relationship?"
Well, at least you're consistent.Just throw those in the bin too. Clear all unnecessary clutter.
I think straight people have no concept of how inescapable their warped idea of sex is. Even if I had slept with no straight people (which sadly is not true, it's considerably more than one) I'd still be pretty well equipped to comment on straight sex.Sounds like you had a bad experience with a straight person and now generalize all of them.
Shade aside, I hope it's obvious that I'm not talking about some kind of technical mastery, but about how cultural attitudes shape your ability to have satisfying (or unsatisfying) sexual encounters. In short, I meant what I said. Being bad at sex is straight culture. The more immersed you are in straight culture, the more likely it is that you will see the world in a way that is conducive to being bad at sex.So, since sexuality is a spectrum, at what point of the "straight/bi" line does one start being good at sex?
Okay this requires clarification. Warped idea of sex? And you think if you had never slept with a straight person, you'd still pretty well equipped to comment on straight sex? That's pretty fucking presumptuous of you, no pun intended.I think straight people have no concept of how inescapable their warped idea of sex is. Even if I had slept with no straight people (which sadly is not true, it's considerably more than one) I'd still be pretty well equipped to comment on straight sex.
Wow, that's messed up.Also, there's an important thing for relationships that I think bears mentioning: religious/spiritual views. I belong to a religion that A) does not recognize gender transition at all and B) does not recognize same sex marriages and will not perform them. And since being married in my church is important to me
I've restricted my own dating pool to people of the same religion.Wow, that's messed up.
Valuing a community is messed up now, you heard it here first.Wow, that's messed up.
The authoritarianism is the messed up part. If CM wants to submit to said authoritarianism, that's cool. All communities would have some strictures but what they are describing seems very excessive.Valuing a community is messed up now, you heard it here first.
Surely that's little different from, say, people outside the US talking about US politics or culture? It's everywhere and can't really be escaped by most people on the Escapist.And you think if you had never slept with a straight person, you'd still pretty well equipped to comment on straight sex? That's pretty fucking presumptuous of you, no pun intended.
The crushing load of insecurity behind the bandwagonners for this astounds me.Heterosexuality is wild.
That's exactly what it means, nothing more and it doesn't have anything to do with promiscuity, monogamy or polygamy, it's just that some people really don't like the idea of bisexuality and claim it doesn't exist, so they make up bullshit in order to prove bisexuals aren't bisexual like "You've been with the same woman for years so you must be a lesbian" or shit of that style, the argument McElroy made is very commonly used by those people.Wait wait, bi just means you're attracted to at least two genders right? I didn't think it had anything to do with promiscuity or monogamy? Does bi actually mean polyamorous and I just didn't know? I have a friend who is bi, and she's been dating the same woman for like 3 years now, and they're happy and all, and its just that she used to have a boyfriend, and they broke up, and then she dated a woman.
They weren't like having 3 ways or boinking anything that moved, she just admits she's attracted to men and women and...and that's it.
Well I am God, so that should give you a good idea of why I'd think that.Simple, yes. Seeing stupidity is on you. I stated an exacerbated fact (that from the outside there can't be a bisexual relationship and thus you can't see bisexuality unless involved with them and their relationships). Not only do you take it as an implication of something else you also associate me with some other thing through... psychic powers, I'm guessing.
Personally i am not interested in sex with people i could not imagine as long term partners raising our children together. Which means, knowing that i can't have children with someone would turn me off extremely.One of the fellows I talked with phrased it like this. "If you met someone who was, by all standards your perfect partner, appearance, personality, interests, everything except the sexual organs, wouldn't you be pretty stupid to reject the possibility of a perfect relationship?"
Adoption is a viable choice and great for a lot of people. I'm not saying that one should date any kind of person, I'm just saying that I find it narrow-minded to totally reject the notion before it even becomes relevant.Personally i am not interested in sex with people i could not imagine as long term partners raising our children together. Which means, knowing that i can't have children with someone would turn me off extremely.
So yes, i obviously do care about the genitals.
However, i don't care about the gender. I don't get gender anyway being agender and sexual attraction does not change based on whether someone identifies as man, women or neither.
So in the end, genitals are important, gender is not. If that pisses off some trans-people, who feel that that means they get treated differently than their preferred gender and more like their at birth assigned gender, it is their problem.
That doesn't help. As i said, knowing i can't have children with someone makes them unattractive for me.Adoption is a viable choice and great for a lot of people.