Teaching kids about homosexuality

[Alex Bergan]

Wanna know how i learned about homosexuality?

I was watching the TV with my folx at the age of 6 and 2 guys kissed on the screen.
I was really surprised and turned to my mom and said "Can a man kiss another man?!".
She said "yes" and i said "Oh.. OK!".

I grew up straight, up until recently had a girlfriend and i have no problems with gay people.

The mind of a child is really simple, and often the best way to explain things like these is to just give a short defenite answer.

no reason to explain how it's not normal or anything like that

 

[BonsaiK]

Do you escapists think that children should be told about homosexuality and homosexual relationships at the same time as they're learning about straight relationships?

I wasn't told about any relationships when I was growing up. My parents simply never discussed that stuff with me - ever. I shudder to think what sort of conversation might have transpired had I ever brought the issue up. Luckily I managed to figure everything out more or less on my own thanks to discovering friend's pornographic magazines. There was no Internet porn back in my day, and to be honest I think the Internet makes sex ed on the basic hetero/homo mechanical level kind of redundant.

 

[Latinidiot]

Don't tell her what isn't necessary. Don't go explaining to her the nuances and details of relationships, but tell her what she asks. Birds and bees, that's heterosexual.

When she asks 'mommy? can 2 women cuddle like that too?'
The parent should answer along the lines of 'yes, but you get no babies that way.'

stay neutral. Let your child get his own opinion.

 

[DudeistBelieve]

I probably wouldn't. Unless I see statistics to the contrary where half of the male/female population is gay, the child ending up being gay is a unique circumstance IMO. Nothing wrong with it, but it's complicated as it is with out bringing it up, handle it as it comes, I say.

 

[Josdeb]

I totally don't see why not.
Hell, it would've helped me out a bit... (Gay teenager here)

 

[Serenegoose]

I would. Kids are smart. Don't talk to them about something they'll find out about on their own, they might get the idea there was some kind of reason behind that omission. Prejudices form, massive fuckup. Best way to go about it is just to be up front about the fact that love, biology, and all that stuff isn't sacred, it isn't special, and it probably will happen. The idea of childhood innocence is a pervasive evil I'd have no part in maintaining, this idea that somehow knowledge corrupts and should be avoided.

 

[thewaever]

"The talk" is all about educating the kid so that they can keep themselves safe from:
* diseases
* unwanted pregnancies
* sexual bullying
...right?

Even if you strictly confine the conversation to sexual mechanics, even if you are 100% certain that your kid is straight, & for the exact same reasons you would talk about heterosexuality, you NEED to include homosexuality in "the talk."

Straight boys sexually bully other straight boys all the time.
Bullying preys on ignorance & fear. If you wait until the kid comes to you with questions, you're way too late.


Let me put it to you this way, would you rather your kid learn from a responsible adult who knows what (s)he's talking about? Who can help guide the kid to a happy, healthy life?

Or would you rather your kid end up like Asher Brown? ...or become one of the bullies that killed him?

A complete education is the only answer.

 

[the trooper]

i would probably stick to teaching straight first, but i wouldn't rule out teaching homosexual relationships either.

 

[badgersprite]

How hard is it to say, "also, some people out there like people of the same gender"? Is that really corrupting anyone?

At age seven, kids at my Christian school were already throwing around "gay" and "lesbian" as insults. We knew what those words meant. Everyone did. And I still didn't give a thought to my sexuality until I was a teenager, despite knowing homosexuality existed. I didn't think about whether I liked boys or girls, I was too busy watching Power Rangers and playing Tekken with my best friend. Kids don't care about this stuff in anything more than a very removed, idle way. They don't even think about it.

Kids don't get their circuits scrambled as easily as paranoid anti-gay propaganda would have us believe. There was a gay couple living down the street from me for most of my childhood, and I still didn't give a thought to the fact that I might be a lesbian (and I am) until I was in high school (I think that would be junior high in the US), the same time any kind of sexual feelings begin to develop in the average kid. And no one else who grew up in my street magically turned out gay either.

 

[garfoldsomeoneelse]

It's up to the parents to decide how unprepared they want their children to be for reality.

 

[thewaever]

"The talk" is all about educating the kid so that they can keep themselves safe from:
* diseases
* unwanted pregnancies
* sexual bullying
...right?

Even if you strictly confine the conversation to sexual mechanics, even if you are 100% certain that your kid is straight, & for the exact same reasons you would talk about heterosexuality, you NEED to include homosexuality in "the talk."

Straight boys sexually bully other straight boys all the time.
Bullying preys on ignorance & fear. If you wait until the kid comes to you with questions, you're way too late.


Let me put it to you this way, would you rather your kid learn from a responsible adult who knows what (s)he's talking about? Who can help guide the kid to a happy, healthy life?

Or would you rather your kid end up like Asher Brown? ...or become one of the bullies that killed him?

A complete education is the only answer.

right, but at 7? really?

Yes.

Asher Brown was 13 when the bullies killed him. It takes alot to push people to commit suicide. They didn't start bullying Brown when he was 13. They'd been bullying him for years.

Obviously, if the parent feels comfortable talking to a 7 year old about sex, then they ought to be comfortable talking to them about... sex. Homosexuality is no different from heterosexuality. If you're going to talk about sex, talk about sex.

Serenegoose said it best:

I would. Kids are smart. Don't talk to them about something they'll find out about on their own, they might get the idea there was some kind of reason behind that omission. Prejudices form, massive fuckup. Best way to go about it is just to be up front about the fact that love, biology, and all that stuff isn't sacred, it isn't special, and it probably will happen. The idea of childhood innocence is a pervasive evil I'd have no part in maintaining, this idea that somehow knowledge corrupts and should be avoided.

 

[Josdeb]

I totally don't see why not.
Hell, it would've helped me out a bit... (Gay teenager here)

but whether or not your homosexual would have been irrelevant as a 7 year old (or at least most 7 yr olds).

What I think should be done with people your age, is when parents have "the talk" when kids are between 10-13, they should throw in homosexuality, etc.

Interestingly, I've found most homosexuals come from families who are completely open to it or completely against it. So it would be interesting to see how many kids would "turn out" to be homosexual after that discussion. (I am not saying that homosexual is a choice, but I do not believe it's purely genetic [my research into the matter has proven that such a thought is naive]; instead, it require a genetic predisposition mixed with how a person was nurtured... this, by and large, is how individual human personalities and preferences are typically made, I have found no reason to assume homosexuality is different).

You obviously aren't gay then.
I was already attracted to some of the older boys around me when I was young. Maybe 9 or 10, but that was still around the time when I started to learn about sex and sexuality.
And by the way, it is ignorant to say you can teach one without the other (Not saying you have, just saying in general)

Also, can I see the study? I like to see research and stuff done and compare it to how I grew up and whatnot. (I'm not calling you out on being wrong or anything, I'd like to see it.)
Also, what do you classify as nuturing that leads to homosexual behaviour? I've heard a lot of people refer to this and all I can think of is dressing a boy in pink and buying them dolls. What does the "nurture" aspect mean?

Also, "my age"?, errrr, you realsie "teenager" extends from 13 to 19, right? I'm 18... Just sayin'...

 

[lettucethesallad]

I totally don't see why not.
Hell, it would've helped me out a bit... (Gay teenager here)

but whether or not your homosexual would have been irrelevant as a 7 year old (or at least most 7 yr olds).

What I think should be done with people your age, is when parents have "the talk" when kids are between 10-13, they should throw in homosexuality, etc.

Interestingly, I've found most homosexuals come from families who are completely open to it or completely against it. So it would be interesting to see how many kids would "turn out" to be homosexual after that discussion. (I am not saying that homosexual is a choice, but I do not believe it's purely genetic [my research into the matter has proven that such a thought is naive]; instead, it require a genetic predisposition mixed with how a person was nurtured... this, by and large, is how individual human personalities and preferences are typically made, I have found no reason to assume homosexuality is different).

I know a few people who're in the closet because of a strict family or religious reasons. The reason you may know more open homosexuals who came from families that were open to the idea could be because of that. If parents don't freak about it, it's easier to have the guts to go with what you want, even if it's someone of the same sex as yourself.

 

[Something Amyss]

No, I do not. I don't think homosexuality should be encouraged, unless it actually comes from the child itself, with as little as external influence as possible.

Who said encouraged? This is basically "gays exist."

 

[Josdeb]

No, I do not. I don't think homosexuality should be encouraged, unless it actually comes from the child itself, with as little as external influence as possible.

Who said encouraged? This is basically "gays exist."

They exist? Crap I should become one!
What? What do you mean blondes? What are they? I'm so becoming one of those!
European? Holy moley! Sounds different! I'm so moving there!
Cactus? I am a cactus!

I kid

Kids are smarter than a lot of people take them for. With their iPhones and their computers... Really, they're well informed. And I mean it.
I got out of school 2 years ago and I was involved in the school musical and I had a lot of time to spend with kids ranging from about 7 to 17. They're pretty sharp.
Yes we should shelter them from smoking and drinking and driving the car and eating rat poisions (until they are of age/whenever) but really, you send them to school? They're gonna meet people of different religions, ethnicities and *gasp* sexualities.
So let's just hope that they're cool with it
The kids I met were cool with mine

 

[Daveman]

tbh at that age (7) I think homosexuality is going to be harder for them to understand, whereas people have this enforced idea of what families are like from their own and those of their friends. I don't think it's particularly homophobic. It's like the time a guy wrote in a newspaper article about my home town saying it was racist and one reason given was that his kids (both under 11) hadn't been taught about the civil rights movement in history. Firstly this is stupid because the government sets the syllabus and is therefore the same across the country and secondly at that age kids wont be able to understand it adequetely, which is why it is taught at GCSE level (15/16). I feel the same idea applies. Although I definitely would tell them before 15, just not at age 7.

 

[Denamic]

[...]saying that it would be 'inappropriate' to tell her about homosexuality at such an early age[...]

Sorry, but saying that homosexuality is ever 'inappropriate' makes one a dumbass in my book.

 

[hudsonzero]

well also tell her about the birds and the birds then

 

[GreigKM]

If there is one thing this topic has demonstrated to me, it is the lack of understanding when in comes to all different sexualities, bisexuality in perticular. Society has some way to go, it would seem...

 

[Terminate421]

Its impossible to teach children about Homosexuality without someone making fun of you.