The cake game

[CounterAttack]

I call Saxton Hale in, and he beats you to death with his bare damn hands, allowing me to take the cake from your corpse. Then he visits you in the afterlife and kills your spirit form. Then he travels to the after-afterlife and... you get the idea.

Before I can hide the cake in an infinite loop in the spacetime continuum, a version of myself from the future arrives, takes the cake and disappears in a flash of light.

 

[Fury Is Me.]

I cut Saxton's head off with my 8 swords and find the cake floating in the continuum.

I come back a reduce you to a puddle of liquid by rapidly doing my signature 8 sword 8000 slash spin 10 times on you.

 

[CounterAttack]

Okay... you had no need to do that. This isn't Kill the Above User's Avatar.

I travel back in time and take the cake from myself in an earlier post, then trigger an Emergency Temporal Shift. Now no-one could possibly know where the cake and I are.

 

[Sleekgiant]

I can't take it anymore
*presses button*
Every nuke has been activated you have 10 seconds to eat the cake
10
9
8
7
6
5
4
3
2
1
*BOOOOOOOOOOM*
Cake and posters are obliterated

 

[CounterAttack]

I bake a new cake and hide it in a fortress guarded by cybernetic ninjas and the Nine Mercenaries of TF2.

 

[Sleekgiant]

I use the spy disguise and take your cake

 

[CounterAttack]

The Pyro Spy-checks you on your way out, takes the cake and puts it back on the Altar of Chocolatey Goodness, next to the six-foot-tall chocolate Easter bunny.

 

[Sleekgiant]

Oh F*** this *uses tactical nuke from MW2*. CA is destroyed but the cake is unharmed

 

[CounterAttack]

I respawn in a room off the Altar chamber and trigger seventeen blade traps in the corridor you're standing in, courtesy of my remote control. Once their cycles are complete, you lie in perfectly sliced blood-soaked cubes of flesh, which are moved via a conveyor belt to a pool of sharks, and the cake is teleported back to the Altar.

 

[Sleekgiant]

I respawn ,luckily behind you
*shoots with shotgun*
*steals cake and eats it*

 

[CounterAttack]

You can't respawn in my base! You're on RED team! I'm BLU.

I stick an arm down your throat, pull the cake out and run to the roof of the fortress. I'll drop the cake if anyone follows me. It'll splat on the ground thirty stories below me and be nothing more than a layer of icing on the concrete.

 

[Tiny116]

NOM NOM
*The zombified Tiny Bites CA's face*
(damn that 7ft Masamune)

*Tiny is a Zombie now, he cares little for the cake as it falls*

NOM NOM NOM

{catch}

 

[Blasphemous Rex]

Original Rex exits pokecenter.

"What did I miss?"

*Reads last pages*

*Calls in a favor from munchlax. Munchlax eats the cake*

 

[Fury Is Me.]

*A small little flame ingites in the middle of the Fortress then starts to collapse in on itself but then explodes into a huge flame the same size as the castle. The flames disperse as quickly as they came and I walk out from where its center once stood." RAAAAGHH!!! You're all turning into very big pests! *Shoots hands backwards and millions of small energy strings shoot out. After 10 seconds, my hundreds of puppets return to me.* We will storm your pathetic fortress and take that cake by anymeans necessary! Charge! *Me and my puppet army all take one step back and get in a battle position, weapons raised, all at once like one osinggle organism, then we leap forward! In speeds too quick to see with the naked eye, we appear on the other end of the fortress, weapons behind us like they'd been swung. The fortress crumbles apart from hundreds of clean sword cuts. As the fortress crumbles to the ground, I shoot out and stab Snorlax, and he pops, the cake flies out and i grab it.* Now i'll just settle this! *I eat the entire cake at once.*

 

[Tiny116]

NOM NOM
*A flaming Zombie Tiny Devours Dispelga's stomach...*
NOM NOM
*Cake falls out*
NOM NOM
*Brains taste as good as cake when you are a Zombie*
NOM NOM
[sub] *Revenge is sweet* [/sub]

 

[Fury Is Me.]

I make Aeris heal me. "I thought i killed you!" Cuts tiny in half horizontally in one quick swipe, then cuts the body in half vertically, all in barely .75 seconds. Tiny fals to the ground in quarters and i take the cake back. "I have the cake! Come and get it!"

 

[Blasphemous Rex]

*Fires Hyperbeam at increasingly annoying Aeris, while Squritle (the really cool one with the sunglasses)uses watergun to douse the flames surounding you. Kadabra (because I forgot the third evloution, or if there even is one) convinces you hand over the cake.*

 

[CounterAttack]

I fire the OverPowered Phail-Cannon at dispelga.

Then I beat Rex in a Pokemon battle, thanks to my Zapdos, Gyarados and Absol. I take the cake as my prize and Fly away to my Secret Base.

 

[Fury Is Me.]

(Sex Rex, evolve of kadabra is alakazam.)

I use a Pheonix Down on Aeris then follow Counter to his Secret Base. I find him and beat him in a pokemon battle thanks tomy beastly Arceus, Rayquaza, Lugia, Ho-Oh, Mew-Two, and Dialga. I take the cake.

 

[CounterAttack]

I fire the Over-Powered Phail-Cannon at dispelga, again. His Pokemon are replaced with ones that would result in a fairer fight, and I beat him through elemental advantage. I take the cake and hide it in the Kingdom of Loathing.