Well guys...

[ender214]

Stab your eyes out than cut off your ears...

If that doesn't do it, attempt to suffocate yourself in your popcorn.

 

[Murrah]

Suicide.

I second that!
I'm no EmoH I promise. *angel face*

 

[Vivaldi]

Here's my handy five step guide

1. Obtain corkscrew
2. Plunge corkscrew into eyeball and twist
3. Repeat process on other eyeball
4. Plunge corkscrew into ear and twist
5. Repeat process on other ear.

Alternatively, you could go in, grinning like a maniac, and continuously yell out (in a fake excited tone) "Wow! This is great! Vampires are so cool! I'm going to dye my hair black and cut myself to be more like them!" in as loud a voice as you can muster until the theatre police kick you out.

Take an ungodly amount of LSD or shrooms. Hallucinogens make everything more fun.

Make out with your cousin...?

Get yourself kicked out the movie by doing things so obscene that I can't mention them on internet forums.

Dear God, I have not laughed so hard in a long time.

Try adding in your own commentary. Worked for me!

 

[mokes310]

Learn to enjoy watching the backs of your eyelids!

 

[stompy]

Hey, it's not like it's his sister or something. That'd just be gross

What if it's his first cousin?

 

[the monopoly guy]

Hey, it's not like it's his sister or something. That'd just be gross

What if it's his first cousin?

He'll be fine as as long as he is in Iowa.

 

[stompy]

What if it's his first cousin?

He'll be fine as as long as he is in Iowa.

What if it's his first cousin?

Well then he'll just be extra quiet.

This, ladies and gentlemen, is some of the greatest the Internet offers. You may fear for the future of mankind.

 

[Lord Beautiful]

Eat massive quantities of chili an hour beforehand and fill the theatre with your masculine odor.

 

[PirateKing]

Imagine that you're watching Hellsing, a much better vampire series. Or, take it completely out of context and make every attempt to softly giggle to yourself at the bizarre sexual scenarios that the story is littered with.

 

[Corven]

Wear some ear plugs and mst3k it.

 

[Murrah]

Say your on a diet and so that means you cannot be bothered because your conserving your energy for something MORE.. I mean more! special/important that twilight.

 

[flare09]

Say that you're on call for your local hospital. Even if you don't work at a hospital.

 

[Hunde Des Krieg]

Suicide.

Seconded

 

[EXPLICITasian]

make whoever is with you give you head

 

[smallharmlesskitten]

Fire

 

[Reaperman Wompa]

If a girl point out everything crap, ruin the ending and make it as annoying as possible. If a boy do this but add as many gay jokes as possible.

 

[the monopoly guy]

make whoever is with you give you head

Did you or did you not read the rest of the thread?

 

[Apocalypse Tank]

...At nine o' clock tonight I have to go with my cousin to go see...


*shudders*


...Twilight, and I can't get out of it.

So I ask you guys, what should I do to make this easier for me while having to sit in the theater?

And I've already tried asking my way out of it, so not going isn't an option.

Stealthily grope every women/chick present in the theater above a 7.5 and bring your significant other, might as well right?
2 + number of women watching = # birds with one ticket.

 

[Dr Pussymagnet]

Alright I just got back from the movie.

. . .

. . .Oh God the sparkeling.

 

[the monopoly guy]

As my classmate once put it
"Vampires burn to death when they go in the sun, not turn into flaming fairies"