What do you really know about Australia?

[Dags90]

Prawns are big, shirmps are tiny(thus why they are called shrimps)
Its like the different between a tiger and a house cat, both are of the same 'family', but they are two different species.

Prawns are a different group of animals, related to but distinct from shrimp. They actually eat prawns in Australia instead of shrimp? Gross if true, prawns are way uglier.

 

[SwagLordYoloson]

Australia is alot like America

There were a bunch of Indigenous peoples that they killed,
They have two neighbours like America,
New Zealand AKA Canada,
And FOB's (Fresh off the Boat) AKA Mexicans
Also they have their own Cuba, North Korea
Also they ride Kangaroos around town, but the cool kids ride Emus

 

[MASTACHIEFPWN]

If you drive a boat into the Great Barrior reef, You will be executed by a headshot from a sniper rifle in FIVE, FOUR, THREE, TWO...

 

[emeraldrafael]

I know its the equivalence of Georgia to the united states (a place where we could send are criminals and provide a buffer between South Carolina and Spanish Florida.
I know that is mostly dead for the amount of area (settlement wise).
I know a shit ton of stuff there can kill you.
I know that you have the Sidney Opera House, which is a modern day example of architectural art.
I know that you have a native people there called the Aborigines.

And I know that Crocodile Dundee is one of your more famous citizens and chief export, along with kangaroos. 8D

 

[subject_87]

They're all madly secretive about Australium, the effects of which have caused them to lead the world in technology and constantly break out into fistfights. Also, only about one-fifth of what is said could be considered 'english' by any stretch of the term, and everyone wrestles large animals with a hunting knife between their teeth. Also, they choose their next king by boxing kangaroos.

That is all.

Oh yes, and it also has a very large stock of things that can kill you, including the platypus, which can poison-shank you to death (That's actually true).

 

[Raioken18]

Hmmm, since I'm from Australia I might out a few inaccuracies I've heard about our country.

1. We don't ride kangaroos, their pouches are filled with mucus and mud and are disgusting.

2. Despite that we have a lot of deadly animals, most of them won't attack you unless you piss them off.

3. Poison animals are not always the deadliest, a large number of our animals have unique bacteria which can cause massively painful infections and death. Required treatments can range from minutes to hours.

4. Crocodiles don't eat people in the same way a shark would (sawing witht heir teeth), they grab onto you with their teeth and roll, breaking bones and tearing flesh. If you even suspect a croc is near somewhere you intend to swim, then don't! Don't even stand around, leave.

5. A lot of the percieved racism in australia comes from a small porportion of the population. Although the few who are genuinely racist are usually very agressive about it.

6. Normal Australian's LOVE foreign accents, if your from a different country, you can get laid in Australia, and do much better than you usually would. You know how hot you are out of 10? add 5 to that total and that's how hot you are here. If you were already a 9 or 10, you could consider yourself a rock star with the ladies/men.

7. The suburbs aren't as bad as everyone makes them out to be, just try to make a few friends first then go out to the local with them and you will be fine.

8. Sydney is an awesome place to club for nerds, you see, if you strike out, then you can go to one of our many all night internet cafes and play until you can catch a train home at 6. The really good thing about this is most of your opponents will be drunk too, so in lan games there's usually a ton of bullets fired and very few hits, lol.

 

[ENKC]

As an Australian myself, I tend to believe Americans think all our males devote our time to wrestling crocodiles. How far off the mark am I?

Also, the most dangerous form of wildlife by far is the 'drop bear'. You don't want to be messin' wid those muddas, homie (that's how Americans speak, right?).

 

[Raioken18]

They're all madly secretive about Australium, the effects of which have caused them to lead the world in technology and constantly break out into fistfights. Also, only about one-fifth of what is said could be considered 'english' by any stretch of the term, and everyone wrestles large animals with a hunting knife between their teeth. Also, they choose their next king by boxing kangaroos.

That is all.

Oh yes, and it also has a very large stock of things that can kill you, including the platypus, which can poison-shank you to death (That's actually true).

It's not true, while the male platypus has an incredibly painful venom, it is unlikely that you will die from it's scratch, althought it can leave you incapacitated for an extended period of time. If you do die from it, it is usually from a bacterial infection being left untreated.

 

[Raioken18]

The platypus also don't use sight or smell very well and instead use electric currents to detect their surroundings. They also have a pouch for carrying eggs.

Yes they lay eggs, and no, baby platypus are ugly as hell.

 

[Weedmilk]

Only place where marsupials live (I'll be damned if I managed to spell that right!) because Australia broke off from the rest of the worlds land masses so long ago that they evolved in Australia and never had a chance to spread anywhere else.

Not true. For example: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Monito_del_monte

 

[RhombusHatesYou]

4. Crocodiles don't eat people in the same way a shark would (sawing witht heir teeth), they grab onto you with their teeth and roll, breaking bones and tearing flesh. If you even suspect a croc is near somewhere you intend to swim, then don't! Don't even stand around, leave.

Crocs rarely eat fresh kills, they prefer to stash them under rocks and stuff in the water. Crocs typically kill via drowning, dragging their victim under the water. Trauma and/or blood loss can kill before this but the croc will usually go ahead with the drowning routine regardless.

6. Normal Australian's LOVE foreign accents, if your from a different country, you can get laid in Australia, and do much better than you usually would. You know how hot you are out of 10? add 5 to that total and that's how hot you are here. If you were already a 9 or 10, you could consider yourself a rock star with the ladies/men.

Not entirely true. You have to have the right accent, which changes from person to person. There are several accents that I'd rather drive roofing nails into my ears than listen to.

7. The suburbs aren't as bad as everyone makes them out to be, just try to make a few friends first then go out to the local with them and you will be fine.

Most burbs are okay regardless, it's only the ones with 'welfare class' reputations (often well deserved) that you shouldn't go to unless you've got mates there.

 

[Risingblade]

There are kangoroos, it was home to british presidents, there a hurricane close by at the moment, shit is expesive there,There a place called Karrantha and Perth, It's like canada but with no snow?

 

[RhombusHatesYou]

It's not true, while the male platypus has an incredibly painful venom, it is unlikely that you will die from it's scratch, althought it can leave you incapacitated for an extended period of time.

That's because the venom basically takes your pain receptors near the wound and cranks them up to 11 and can take months to wear off. In extreme cases the doctors will just severe the affected nerves.

 

[The-Bad-Blooded]

I don't know HOW many times I've said this, but Australians have NEVER, in the History of the Universe, EVER, said 'Chunder' or the term 'whack a Shrimp on the Barbie'

1. because they sound REDICULOUS
2. because only pussies eat shrimp, we eat PRAWNS.

Australia is known for having Naturally Beautiful people...

 

[ENKC]

Plus an Aussie mate of mine grew up near this little town in the outback where a load of people ended up on smack, and in a rare show of liberalism the local government effectively stopped enforcing laws against softer drugs like dope and psychedelics in order to curb this problem. It worked. Kinda. Now it's full of hippie types, has an annual joint-rolling festival and the police station has an elaborate hallucinogenic mural on the front that they can't be bothered to take down. Sounds like fun.

Nimbin: Stoner Capital of the World.

Debate about whether it being a country or a continent has/had been going on for a while.

Screw being American

Please tell me you're deliberately poking fun at perceptions of the geographical ignorance of Americans. Please.

I also have heard the taxation is included in cost when purchasing. Canada really should adopt this policy.

I'm an Australian tax accountant, so here goes. We have something called Goods and Services Tax (GST) charged on most goods and services (there are some exceptions). This is similar to any number of 'sales' or 'consumption' taxes around the world. It is NOT a substitute for income tax as we still pay that and still fill out tax returns. I should know - I just did five hundred of them in four months.

 

[RhombusHatesYou]

I don't know HOW many times I've said this, but Australians have NEVER, in the History of the Universe, EVER, said 'Chunder' or the term 'whack a Shrimp on the Barbie'

'Chunder' was used regularly until around the mid-80s when it was superceded by 'spew' and 'puke'. If you go out bush and visit any of the Towns That Time Forgot you'll occasionally still hear 'chunder'.

 

[Mr Pantomime]

I know when I was over there, I was at a touchpool in an aquarium, and they had a blue-ringed Jellyfish in there. You guys are intense.

I think you mean either a Blue Ringed Octopus, which are very deadly,
or a Blue Bottle (a type of jellyfish with like projectile stinging tendrils) not deadly, a little painful but not much.

I remember going to the aquarium and getting bitten by a baby crocodile in the touchpool, don't worry, unless their big enough to roll over and break your neck or tear a limb off, their not too harmful, just a few stitches.

Sorry, I meant Blue-Ringed Octopus

 

[RhombusHatesYou]

I'm an Australian tax accountant, so here goes. We have something called Goods and Services Tax (GST) charged on most goods and services (there are some exceptions). This is similar to any number of 'sales' or 'consumption' taxes around the world.

And they still haven't removed half of the taxes the GST was supposed to 'replace' because "hey, money!"

 

[Mr Thin]

Edit: It sure is nice to see the amount of Australians saying nice things about this pla-oh wait, no...Aussie aussie aussie?

Oi Oi Oi!

The lack of Australian spirit in this thread is disheartening. Some Australians are even bashing this country! Where are the patriots!?

Also, to the poms going on about beating us in cricket, we just beat England 3 times in a row in the ODIs, so nyeh.

 

[RhombusHatesYou]

Sorry, I meant Blue-Ringed Octopus

I've been bitten by one of those little bastards. Docs said if I hadn't been pissed out of my skull and if I'd gotten a full dose of the venom I'd've been dead instead of just chucking my guts up and being laid up in bed for a week.