What if Videogame Characters could use FML...

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TheMann

New member
Jul 13, 2010
459
0
0
Killing the Emperor was at the top of my to-do list, but I never did get around to it. As of this moment, I've just shot my best friend in the face and am now carrying my dazed, naked, genocidal ex-girlfriend across a scorching lava bed. FML.

-spacecowboy44

Well, I just found out that my entire life was a lie. I never did grow up on that nice farm. Instead, my father was a megalomaniacal billionaire industrialist and my mother was a stripper he was banging. The former I just murdered with a putter because I was kindly asked to do so, and the latter was murdered by the former for getting pregnant with me and selling the embryo to a crazy genetic scientist. I received this information in this underwater shit-hole after my flight took a nosedive into the Atlantic. Oh wait, it gets better. Technically, I'm only about four years old, so when I want to get completely tanked after all this is over they probably won't even let me in the bar. FML.

-jackattak

Another awesome productive day at work! I think I just blew up the supercomputer that my company's been working on for the last 12 years. Well, at least I made it out of that place alive and I'm totally keeping this cool gadget I found, even if it is company property. Now I'm just going to go home take a shower and... wait what's that? No. NO, OH SHIT, FML!!!

-MelloChello

You know, I thought free-running was a fun, cool sport. However, now I'm mostly just getting shot at, which is a real fucking buzz-kill. FML.

-losingFaith

okay just one more I promise...

I've had plenty of things to complain about recently, but today was especially bad. My good friend and colleague was killed by aliens and right in front of his daughter, no less. I feel like we need to be taking some sort of action about this, but for some reason we're just sitting around doing nothing. FML.

-anticitizen1
 

Volkade

New member
Dec 28, 2009
62
0
0
Got Drunk, crashed into a warship, leading to the deaths of my best friends. FML

-Dicktits
 

IronStorm9

New member
Jun 15, 2010
186
0
0
Today, my ship started telling me to do things. Now I've got about 700 Geth chilling in the engine room and I AM SOVEREIGN! Sorry about that. FML.
-TurianSpec
 

Mauso88

A Simply Dignified Manly Man.
Feb 3, 2011
265
0
0
Stole a priceless artefact today, left me with a bad feeling. Wish these people would leave me alone, I hate this city. FML

HoodedMisanthrope

Went to work today, seemed quite normal. Experiment opened up portals to another dimension, MIT never prepared me for this. FML

HeadHumperG

Found a baby girl, lost my wife. Went to strange town, lost my baby girl. Trapped in strange town, ''Huh, radio. What's with that radio?'' now it's inexplicably getting dark, there's sirens and all the floors gone rusty. I should have stayed at home... FML

UnluckyBastardMason
 

Volkade

New member
Dec 28, 2009
62
0
0
Stole this one from a shirt I saw

Those WERE the droids I was looking for. FML

-trooper_of_the_storm
 

Aesir23

New member
Jul 2, 2009
2,860
0
0
Spent a millenium serving my ass of a Lord, got my wings ripped off, thrown into a lake and now I'm face to face with a giant squid. FML

SoulDevourer17
 

Innegativeion

Positively Neutral!
Feb 18, 2011
1,636
0
0
"Had that dream again. Seems to come at least once a week. 10... or maybe it was 25, random mooks decked out in ridiculously flashy armor beat the shit out of me and steal my stuff. FML."

-likearaidbaws99
 

Free Thinker

New member
Apr 23, 2010
1,332
0
0
"So I just killed that stupid Krogan Wrex. I totally saved Shepard! He did put down his shotgun to give Shepard a bro-fist, but he was going to snap Shepard's neck, so I shot him. And the commander is angry! And now I'm stuck waiting for this nuke to go off since that asshole left me behind. FML."

Ashley, ME1.
 

AmiIce

New member
Apr 8, 2011
1
0
0
Today, I had to listen to a whiny little priest have a panic attack because he is actually the emperor's only remaining son. Never mind the fact that I had to rescue him in the first place, and I now have to run errands for him to SAVE THE WORLD while he sits in his library reading a BOOK!!! FML.

--The REAL hero of Cyrodiil
 

Blemontea

New member
May 25, 2010
1,321
0
0
After the circus turned out to be full of killer clowns looking for my necklace, being chased around town by a robot, running through the sewers, and punching an elephant out with a mech. I finally get to the end of the sewers and that giant robot is there waiting for me... and i need a picture of its attack to make half the stuff i want. FML
-RedStoneMax
 

wehrp3nguin

New member
Dec 21, 2009
83
0
0
Today, I saw my old buddy Francis with his new group of friends. I asked if they wanted to go out for drinks. They threw a molotov at me, and ran away.FML

JackedJared22
 

Anyalla

New member
Feb 24, 2011
2
0
0
Found a locked door in a forest. Opened it with a key. Found identical locked door inside. Key is no longer usable. FML

HeroOfTime1985
 

SuperSuperSuperGuy

New member
Jun 19, 2010
1,200
0
0
"My sister was turned to crystal and now I have this brand on my boob which means that I will, too, or I'll become a zombie. FML."
-LightningStrikeXIII

"spy bakstab medic and snipr hedshot me. fml"
-giantman2

"The girl I like left on a long journey with our school teacher and some random mercenary without saying goodbye, and now me and my best friend are banished from our village. FML."
-MyDadIsADwarf

"I had to give up all of my life to seal away death itself. FML."
-TheFool0
 

SkyeNeko

New member
Dec 30, 2010
3,104
0
0
"Just found out that my dad manipulated my mom to break all the rules and fall in love with him just so he could cause a civil war and wipe out her clan. FML."
-SexyWitch666

captcha: eyes eaddid
 

HeySeansOnline

New member
Apr 17, 2009
872
0
0
I have a few. Cool points if you can guess all three.

"Went to the shop today, I finally had gotten that blasted Ruby, now I can finally get that armor. I was selling my spare stuff and I went to order the armor, only to notice an item was missing. I had sold the Ruby in my haste and the lady wouldn't give it back. FML"

-RathPWNER1337

"I was hanging with my boys when we heard about some weaklings coming back from the war. We headed down to the medical tents in the night and fucked them all up. I went to leader and chopped his head off, I held it up laughing and noticed in the night it was my dad's head. He had just went off to war a few weeks ago. FML"

-AzureKnight12

"Just jumped out of my jet. Realised I forgot a prachute. I'm out. FML"

-CjFromSA
 

Signa

Noisy Lurker
Legacy
Jul 16, 2008
4,746
6
43
Country
USA
Spent billions making an underwater utopia, and some douche comes in an wrecks it. Seriously, FML.

Sweatygolfer49