Where would you hide a dead body?
- Thread starter ChanTheNoob
- Start date
Recommended Videos
Assuming I left no fingerprints on the body or the weapon that was used I would buy some cement mix and dig up a part of the concrete in the basement of my house. After I dig a hole big enough I would dump the body inside and proceed to lay new cement on that part of the floor. After it dries I would put a table or couch over top of it.
Yeah, that was a joke, I am fully aware that dead bodies suddenly turning up anywhere would quite probably create a stir.Zuljeet said:
I've just gotten into working on a cold, miserable Monday morning and this made me laugh. Well played.NeutralUsername said:
If I killed someone, intentional or not I would just freak out and run. The body would stay where it falls and I would hope for the best.
Of course my murder tactics would hopefully leave no body or make it very hard to find or use. I hear people drow near body eating sharks all the time. Whats one more?
Of course my murder tactics would hopefully leave no body or make it very hard to find or use. I hear people drow near body eating sharks all the time. Whats one more?
As in any good recipe, each step starts with a verb:
1. Take corpse on holiday retreat to a remote place(Personal recommendation: swampland).
2. Dismember body into 13 parts ( halves of limbs, head, quarters of torso).
3. Each part will now fit in an oven. Wrap in tin foil and roast individually into charcoal.
4. Brush charcoal off of bone, and store in a barrel.
5. Crush bones with sledgehammer, and add to barrel.
6. Mix powdered corpse with powdered thermite in barrel.
7. Add remote magnesium detonator to barrel.
8. Bury barrel with lid closed.
9. Retreat to safe distance and apply detonator (All remaining DNA will be cooked to oblivion, and all carbon will be burned, resulting in barrel-shaped lump of rust).
10. Return from holiday retreat, happy from your time of relaxation.
Optional Icing:
11. Return to location the following year.
12. Dig up barrel shaped rust lump.
13. Carve into figure of your victim.
14. Place artwork in police station, hanging by neck from roof.
15. flee.
1. Take corpse on holiday retreat to a remote place(Personal recommendation: swampland).
2. Dismember body into 13 parts ( halves of limbs, head, quarters of torso).
3. Each part will now fit in an oven. Wrap in tin foil and roast individually into charcoal.
4. Brush charcoal off of bone, and store in a barrel.
5. Crush bones with sledgehammer, and add to barrel.
6. Mix powdered corpse with powdered thermite in barrel.
7. Add remote magnesium detonator to barrel.
8. Bury barrel with lid closed.
9. Retreat to safe distance and apply detonator (All remaining DNA will be cooked to oblivion, and all carbon will be burned, resulting in barrel-shaped lump of rust).
10. Return from holiday retreat, happy from your time of relaxation.
Optional Icing:
11. Return to location the following year.
12. Dig up barrel shaped rust lump.
13. Carve into figure of your victim.
14. Place artwork in police station, hanging by neck from roof.
15. flee.
There was a guy down the road from us in the house where I grew up. He owned a pet crematorium - used to contract out to the local veterinarians.ChanTheNoob said:
A quick trip down to his house while he was away on holiday... Wouldn't be much left after that. Any ash remaining would be assumed to be from a local moggy.
You could also use maggots and a sledgehammer.
In physiology class we had to strip an animal skull down to nothing for practice in preservation of bone samples.
It wouldn't be for the faint-hearted. Or for people that have others dropping in to visit all the time.
But you could chop the body up into manageable pieces while it was still fresh.
Strip off all of the flesh that you could with knives/scalpels (and feed it to pigs etc - or just put into a rubbish bag and casually dump it into the local landfill).
Let maggots do most of the rest.
Then you're just left with bones. Recognisably human bones, however (which is the problem).
Bones inside bag + sledgehammer = white powder that can't be recognised as much of anything. Or at least they'd be reduced to bone fragments that are NOT recognisably human.
Probably dissolve it in a large drum of some kind of potent acid, over the course of a week and poor that ************ down the drain... sounds pretty good to me... just have to find a good way of disposing of the barrel and scrubbing the tub...<.<
I would dump it in my bath tub filled with caustic acid but obviously not the kind to break down the bath tub! and gradually let the body break down until it poors down the drain, i would also kit the bathroom out with an extractor fan to deal with the smell. Any teeth or bones left i would break down and grind and scatter around various parks and ponds in the area.
There's quite a few coal mines in North Carolina and Virginia that have been abandoned for almost a hundred years. Only time they pull bodies out is when children discover them while playing.
So yes Australia may be big and shovels cheap, but America is bigger and we've got great big fuck off holes everywhere that no one ever checks.
So yes Australia may be big and shovels cheap, but America is bigger and we've got great big fuck off holes everywhere that no one ever checks.
Well... wasn't completely out the blue...? Bricktop keeps pigs for this very reason, and he walks in on 3 blokes trying to dispose of a dead body. I mean, if there was ever a time to share his knowledge then that would have been it.Hero in a half shell said:
If I ever had to get rid of a dead body it'd depend entirely on how close I was to the victim (as in how easily it'd tie back to me). If it was a loose connection I'd be tempted to dump it in some heavy crime area with a missing wallet. Otherwise, I guess I'd have to go for the old bury deep somewhere completely random out the way and hope for the best.
It'd be nice to start doing things like using acid in the bath tub and stuff but I dont think I'd have the stomach for that.
A few months ago, a store near my work was having the parking lot repaved. The previous one had been torn up, and it would be a few days until it was replaced. When I saw that field of dirt and gravel, my first thought was that it would be the perfect place to hide a body. A similar idea would be to bury it the foundation of a house that is about to be built. Concrete would be poured over the body, and nobody would know... That's probably happened a lot!
I wouldn't hide it. Messing with the body is how motherfuckers get caught. Did Jack the Ripper hide bodies? No. He just left them there. Some of them were still warm when they were found. He got away with it by being quick, killing strangers, and knowing his neighbourhood.
Yeah, that one is brilliant.Copper Zen said:It is obscene that no one has posted this yet!
[HEADING=2]Security Question[/HEADING]
OT: I won't say where I would--ahem, theoretically--hide a dead body. >.>
What if I needed to, um, actually hide a body some time? I might as well hand the cops a treasure map and dare them to prove that I did it.
Sheesh!
OT: I would douse it with some beer and place it on the bus. People really don't want to share a seat with anyone on the bus and especially not the sleeping guy reeking of beer. He could be on that bus for years before someone realizes he is dead.
