You know you've been on the Escapist too long when...

[UltraDeth]

There are 6 missed calls.

 

[Living_Brain]

You have 9 new voicemails and half of them are pure silence.

 

[UltraDeth]

Sharks are outside.

 

[Living_Brain]

Your computer is suddenly infected with screen-eating cockroaches that cause a BSoD

 

[UltraDeth]

It's time to live and time to die.

 

[Living_Brain]

The numbness in your leg subsides in order to usher in a wave of warmth

 

[UltraDeth]

It's next Monday.

 

[Living_Brain]

Opening your eyes, you're greeted with the sight of all your family members staging an intervention.

 

[UltraDeth]

Alex Jones is one the loose again.

 

[Living_Brain]

Dam Son
is now playing
Your Mom Simulator 2017

 

[UltraDeth]

Lords of Cinder are in the Houses of Parliament.

 

[Drake the Dragonheart]

you've been away for months and then pick right back up.

 

[UltraDeth]

It's been a hundred years since World War 1.

 

[Barbas]

Radio Graffiti's as morbid as it was five years ago.

 

[Level 7 Dragon]

You begin to discuss the concept of nihilism on the Wild West

 

[Barbas]

The Wild West has become The Unexciting East.

 

[UltraDeth]

I'm the best we've got, apparently.

 

[Barbas]

The knowledge of the school of alteration is fading.

 

[UltraDeth]

The continent of Skyrim has nothing new to explore.

 

[Barbas]

Your fingers have fallen off.