Zero Punctuation: Clive Barker's Jericho
- Thread starter Yahtzee Croshaw
- Start date
You, shuddap, now. Yahztee Croshaw does not "Rant", he Reviews, you jackass.HuCast said:Ah come on...Yahzee doesnt make "serious" reviews for magazines or websites and most of the games he "reviews" he tears to pieces-you cant compare his "rants" with reviews
P.S. Thanks to the guy who linked the "Excuuuuse me, princess" video...I had hoped to have forgotten that.
http://www.fullyramblomatic.com/ - read the news from 9/11/07. Yahtzee comments on accusations like these. =)HuCast said:Ah come on...Yahzee doesnt make "serious" reviews for magazines or websites and most of the games he "reviews" he tears to pieces-you cant compare his "rants" with reviews
Terrific review, but what's with talking so slow, man? C'mon, speed it up, this one was almost a minute longer than last week's.
I must be the only one here who didn't think the MOH:A review was a horrendous slip-up that calls for Yahztee to redeem himself in the eyes of the fans.
I swear those button sequence pushing thingies were around way back in the NES days, but I'm old and my memory does not serve me well. For all I know my age-addled brain is combining the original Simon games of my youth with some late-80s erotic thriller I once watched on Cinemax into a false memory.
I must be the only one here who didn't think the MOH:A review was a horrendous slip-up that calls for Yahztee to redeem himself in the eyes of the fans.
I swear those button sequence pushing thingies were around way back in the NES days, but I'm old and my memory does not serve me well. For all I know my age-addled brain is combining the original Simon games of my youth with some late-80s erotic thriller I once watched on Cinemax into a false memory.
in defense of Shenmue... In the second game it has those button press sequences however some of them you can fail which will lead to an alternate scenario and I really thought that was a nice touch... go through the game and find out what happens if you get your ass kicked at one of the choice point QTEs... lol
I love these reviews, but what's with all the first person shooters? I count five that you've reviewed so far. I know you don't pick your games now, so it would be nice if The Escapist would hand you games from other genres more often.
This is an accusaiton that is often made, and I can see why its made, but I'm not sure it stands up to the facts:Spindrifter said:
1) Heavenly Sword: Action/Adventure Hack & Slash
2) Psychonauts: Plataformer (I think?)
3) Bioshock: FPS
4) Tomb Raider Anniversary: Action/Adventure.
5) Manhunt: FPS
6) Peggle: Puzzle game
7) Halo 3: FPS
8) Tabula Rasa: MMORPG
9) Orange Box: FPS
10) Super Paper Mario: Plataformer
11) MOH Airborne: FPS
12) Clive Barker's Jericho by Clive Barker (Clive Barker): FPS
If I'm doing my math right, FPS's are a little under 50% of his total reviews. Granted, they are the single largest single category, but that's not really all that strange, considering that more FPS's are released than most other genres, at the moment, and he's good a healthy dose of most of the other current major active genres (action adventure..). Certainly, I'd like to see him review a strategy or RPG game, but those come out at a somewhat slower pace, so I don't exactly attribute it to a conspiracy.
Certaintly, he mixes it up a good deal.
Chilango2 said:
You missed out Zelda
hantom hourglass, and "the darkness" review, accuracy is a pride that you do not pride yourself uponthat is a very good point, yes, he does definately sound like a southerner, and since you used that term, im going to assume your from the north, or other part of british isles, anyway, its not just the voice, its the generel british cynicism you just cant get anywhere else, "british cynicism, best in the world", anyway, yes...im also british, and as such, i crave dissapointment, which is why yahtzee plays awful games, and i eat kinder-surprise, cheap-nasty chocolate, scummy little toy, a double-barrel! of disillusionment, which is why i call them "the eggs of numbing inevitability", and i always ask for them in the third person, "Richard Smith would like the eggs of numbing inevitability", once, the guy answered back saying "how many would you like?", i said 7, and he replied "thats a whole lot of cheap and nasty chocolate", and then we both laughed, as we both know there is hardly any chocolate anyway.ShmenonPie said:
I hate to say it, Yahtzee, but I think your hypocrisy is beginning to show.
I noticed in the beginning that you listed the Orange Box as one of your 'good' games despite Episode 2 being noticeably short and repetitive using similar puzzles and encounters all in the same shadow of the continuing storyline. Later on, you pick at Phantom Hourglass for using the same storyline.
I'm no connoisseur either, but I'm pretty sure that similar story+different puzzles > continuing story+same puzzles. I'm giving Zelda the benefit of 'similar story' because only fanboys of the highest calibur agree that Zelda doesn't change the story: Majora's Mask had no Zelda and no Ganon as you tried to stop the moon from colliding into the earth, Wind Waker involved saving your sister up until the very end of the game when the confrontation between Link, Zelda, and Ganon occurred, and Twilight Princess involved stopping darkness from taking over the entire world; Zelda and Ganon, again, didn't appear until the very end.
Yes, I know that I'm sounding like a nitpicky bastard, but little things like this get to me very easily. It pains me to hear developers get praised for similar installments yet Nintendo gets flack simply because they've been around longer. I love these reviews of yours, but when they begin to sound like they're catering to a specific fanboy group, they tend to be a little less enjoyable.
I noticed in the beginning that you listed the Orange Box as one of your 'good' games despite Episode 2 being noticeably short and repetitive using similar puzzles and encounters all in the same shadow of the continuing storyline. Later on, you pick at Phantom Hourglass for using the same storyline.
I'm no connoisseur either, but I'm pretty sure that similar story+different puzzles > continuing story+same puzzles. I'm giving Zelda the benefit of 'similar story' because only fanboys of the highest calibur agree that Zelda doesn't change the story: Majora's Mask had no Zelda and no Ganon as you tried to stop the moon from colliding into the earth, Wind Waker involved saving your sister up until the very end of the game when the confrontation between Link, Zelda, and Ganon occurred, and Twilight Princess involved stopping darkness from taking over the entire world; Zelda and Ganon, again, didn't appear until the very end.
Yes, I know that I'm sounding like a nitpicky bastard, but little things like this get to me very easily. It pains me to hear developers get praised for similar installments yet Nintendo gets flack simply because they've been around longer. I love these reviews of yours, but when they begin to sound like they're catering to a specific fanboy group, they tend to be a little less enjoyable.
If your going to list the Darkness (which he made before he joined the Escapist), why not also list Fable? (the list implied "since he bagn reviewing games here), altough I did not state this outright, which was foolish of me.)Kronopticon said:You missed out Zelda
But yes, I did miss Zelda. A thousand apologies. Zelda would, I believe, be action/adventure? It would add to, say, the basic point of my post, I believe?
It makes sense to me. Doing one review a week, you try to hit the most popular games, which for various reasons mostly tend to be FPS. Also, it helps that bad FPS games are easy to make fun of; even if Yahtzee liked RPGs, the technical flaws in bad RPGs aren't quite as hilarious.Spindrifter said:
Half-Life has only had 4 games (if you count the episodes as fully fledged games) over 9 years. Zelda has had 14 games over 22 years. Also, a continuation of a story (Half-Life) != rehashing the same story (Zelda).Kenkaku said:
I love Jericho, I thought it was a great game, my only problem was a somewhat weak ending--but there's a sequel in the works which picks up exactly where the first leaves off, so even that's forgivable. I still don't quite understand why the reviews for this game were so negative. FPS's are my favorite genre and Jericho is really one of the most fun First person shooters I've played in a while. I enjoyed it more than F.E.A.R., which was also a very good game. I urge everyone to at least rent the game and decide for yourself, the reviews have been way too harsh. I also find it weird that the reviewer left out the whole character-switching feature, and characters' special abilities. The review was pretty funny, but not very accurate.
I have to disagree. In short: the story was awsome, the characters were interesting, the gameplay wasn't that bad, I like the QTEs in this game, they made sense (though in most of the games I hate them), the design was quite good, the game had a good atmosphere, it was linear but I don't see why that's a problem (do wee need only non-linear shooters? I don't think so.) and the music was great too. I think the game deserves 8/10.