Zero Punctuation: iPhone Games
- Thread starter Yahtzee Croshaw
- Start date
I guess I figured out how to breath on Mars Yahtzee. I don't own an iPhone and don't plan on buying one because the whole 'i' thing is frankly below me, I had an iPod at one point and all it brought me was frustation and so many curses that I think I've officially been banned from any sort of afterlife, good or evil.
What's all this about innovation? Use physics to get something to fall into a hole game? shooting projectiles to knock down buildings and kill those inside? cutting flying things on your screen?
Do people ever played any online flash games?..
These games are hardly innovative and, in comparison to all the triple A games, they might keep you entertained for an hour or two. not really worth it for something i could get for free online.
Does making the game itself portable make it innovative? i don't think so personably but others might.
Do people ever played any online flash games?..
These games are hardly innovative and, in comparison to all the triple A games, they might keep you entertained for an hour or two. not really worth it for something i could get for free online.
Does making the game itself portable make it innovative? i don't think so personably but others might.
I guess iphones are culturally grafted to almost everything now. I have no intention of ever getting an iphone but the episode was interesting and entertaining enough... at least in comparison to other things.
Good call to do this week's feature on iPhone games, but I can't help but feel he only covered the very tip of a monolithic iceberg.
Yahtzee.. What the hell? Your not honestly one of those retarded, childish f*ck heads that thinks cr*ppy iphone games are as good as any console?
You know who enjoys iphone games? Children! The kind of children that need entertaining every bloody second of every day, who can't take a ten minute journey without feeling the need to slice fruit.
Besides sh*tty iphone apps aren't the only way to get new low budget ideas out there, Xbox have an indie game section and I'm pretty sure there was another thing... This little thing called the fucking INTERNET!!!
You know who enjoys iphone games? Children! The kind of children that need entertaining every bloody second of every day, who can't take a ten minute journey without feeling the need to slice fruit.
Besides sh*tty iphone apps aren't the only way to get new low budget ideas out there, Xbox have an indie game section and I'm pretty sure there was another thing... This little thing called the fucking INTERNET!!!
I'd just like to point out that rendering Marcus Fenix's nipples isn't that expensive, as an indie developer, you can license the Unreal Development Kit (the engine on which Gears of War is done) for a mere $99, which is really cheap for a full game engine. The catch being, of course, that Epic will take 25% of all your profits > $5000, but considering that the Unreal Engine 2 was priced at around $350000, it is kind of a good deal.
So did I! It's called "Android".Puddle Jumper said:
Got a SonyEricsson X10 and it kicks the living daylight out of my sweet loving partner's iPhone, or as I call in in my native tounge: i-Fåne (mean i-Fool). And all the games that Yahtzee reviewed are on that too.
/S
Iphone minigames on a games meccha site? new low.
Why does yahtzee review Psp, Nintendo DS, Gameboy games, Junk with a battery, screen, dpad etc. anyhow?
If you need a list of pc/ps3/xbox360 games to review which don't bore your mind out of your skull let me know.
I'd concider anykind of 2d game antique now. I bet if someone would put alex the kid or mario 1, bubble bobble, golden axe on the ipod whatever and resell it would be the "best game ever" on those machines.
Only 2d sidescroll games i ever found interresting are flight games and maybe a few war games.
Anyhow for 2d games, the flash game creators probably beat them by far in innovation but grafics they can't win in.
Why does yahtzee review Psp, Nintendo DS, Gameboy games, Junk with a battery, screen, dpad etc. anyhow?
If you need a list of pc/ps3/xbox360 games to review which don't bore your mind out of your skull let me know.
I'd concider anykind of 2d game antique now. I bet if someone would put alex the kid or mario 1, bubble bobble, golden axe on the ipod whatever and resell it would be the "best game ever" on those machines
.Only 2d sidescroll games i ever found interresting are flight games and maybe a few war games.
Anyhow for 2d games, the flash game creators probably beat them by far in innovation but grafics they can't win in.
My brother has the Desire HD which is better than the original desire you say you own, and its specs are identical to the iPhone4. But where the Desire HD has a better camera, the iP4 has a better display so its really just down to which brand you feel like humping.Triple360 said:
Oh, you also fail incredibly hard, I mean stupidly INCREDIBLY hard, for thinking that Android is Microsoft's mobile OS. ITS GOOGLE YOU NIT-WIT.
I don't own in Iphone, in fact I have a Nokia prepaid gophone my phone only does calls, texts and has a flashlight and yes I am proud of having a cheap phone thats only a phone.
Although I have played the games mentioned in the review except the physic game he mentioned but a played a very similar flash game in fact I played all of the rest as flash games, so if your interested in playing the games just do a google search without buying an Iphone or paying any money at all they are all rather fun. My only problem with them is none of the games mentioned with the exception of doodle gods is original, if you play flash games you would have seen this games years ago done by different people. I do like the Flash and phone games it's a great place to try something new or just really weird without huge risk but half of them are still just tower defense games or physic puzzles.
Although I have played the games mentioned in the review except the physic game he mentioned but a played a very similar flash game in fact I played all of the rest as flash games, so if your interested in playing the games just do a google search without buying an Iphone or paying any money at all they are all rather fun. My only problem with them is none of the games mentioned with the exception of doodle gods is original, if you play flash games you would have seen this games years ago done by different people. I do like the Flash and phone games it's a great place to try something new or just really weird without huge risk but half of them are still just tower defense games or physic puzzles.
Breath on Mars? It's a very complicated process, converting Carbon dioxide to elemental Oxygen, so I best not strain your little pea brain. Totally worth the view of the Valles Marineris.
This is why you never look at the charts. There are MUCH better games than that on the iPhone.
The Asphalt racing games, even though they are based on tilt sensors, are incredibly fun. N.O.V.A. Near Orbit Vanguard Alliance (yes you actually have to put the dots into 'nova' to find it on the app store) is clearly a Halo wanna-bee but damn, I hate Halo but NOVA is actually pretty decent.
Though my favourite games right now are two I used to own on the Amiga back in the early 90s. Pinball Dreams and Pinball Fantasies! :b
The Asphalt racing games, even though they are based on tilt sensors, are incredibly fun. N.O.V.A. Near Orbit Vanguard Alliance (yes you actually have to put the dots into 'nova' to find it on the app store) is clearly a Halo wanna-bee but damn, I hate Halo but NOVA is actually pretty decent.
Though my favourite games right now are two I used to own on the Amiga back in the early 90s. Pinball Dreams and Pinball Fantasies! :b
