Zero Punctuation: MindJack

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Brainst0rm

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Apr 8, 2010
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The moment I saw "Mindjack", I knew this was going to be a glorious beat-down. Yahtzee never disappoints.
 

destro9

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Feb 23, 2011
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Well,SquareEnix had nothing to do with the DeusEX 1 and 2(Programmed by ION Storm published by Eidos) and they are only the publishers not developers of DEX 3,although they did the cut scenes.
I still have faith in DEX3 but...
 

beema

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Aug 19, 2009
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I always wonder how and why completely pointless games like this get made. I mean, even if it's complete crap, it's probably not cheap to produce. I have to think that somewhere way back when there might have actually been some good concept that initiated this game, before it was destroyed.

Sometimes I feel bad for developers who make these things. I mean, this game was already barely on anyone's radar afaik. I saw a trailer for it randomly one day and that's been about it (the trailer looked terrible). To hear that on top of being a small poorly-advertised under the radar game that it's complete garbage makes me feel sad for it, but also bewildered.
 

Cosplay Horatio

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May 19, 2009
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So Mindjack is a game where people can enter your campaign game and troll you....*FLIPS TABLE OVER* I'd rather play nothing but the Bulletstorm demo for the rest of my life than this game.
 

Volucer

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Sep 4, 2008
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Admittedly I hadn't even heard of MindJack before the review (and will definately stay away from it based on what I've now heard from Yahtzee and others). But I am curious as to whether Yahtzee guessed right about the plot twist of controlling a mindjacking element.
 

WilliamRLBaker

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Jan 8, 2010
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Mrhappyface 2 said:
This somewhat reminded me of a really buggy combination of Psi Ops, and The Nomad Soul when I first played it.
Loved psi ops if not just for the story...sadly it turned out it was a complete pile of plagarism and we never saw psi ops 2...
 

azukar

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Sep 7, 2009
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Wow, it's rare to see Yahtzee review a game he unequivocally enjoyed and thought was high-quality!
 

mireko

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Sep 23, 2010
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I was hoping this game would be good when I first heard of it, the idea of playing as a disembodied, shady figure controlling civilians to foil bank robberies and such sounded completely awesome.

Of course, all those hopes were curb-stomped by the trailers. And the reviews. Sheesh.

[sub]I actually did like the first trailer with the ultra-campy voiceover, but then they had to ruin it with robot monkeys (??) and Blandy McProtagonist the Blandth. [/sub]
 

RowdyRodimus

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Apr 24, 2010
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Sovvolf said:
You know I was almost about to impulse buy this game today however I decided not to as I may need to money later for buying hookers better things. I guess I made the right decision. That being said, I sort of had that idea in mind anyway. I watched Angry Joes review and read a few other reviews on the game and it looks like its been universally panned.

I don't usually buy my games completely based on others reviews but when I've seen the gameplay and read reviews that are most if not all negative and all pretty much rabbiting on about the same things... I kind of thing that I'd be better keeping my money.
Good thing you didn't buy it or you'd end up Mind Jack-ing off. (sorry for the bad pun)

It seems with the MP idea they said, "You know that game Demon's Souls where other people can help out during the single player game? Fuck that, let's do the opposite! Innovation!"
 

HellspawnCandy

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Oct 29, 2009
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Even though Square Enix only published this game, it's making me wary of how Human Revolution will turn out. If they have faith in a game as bad as this I'm getting scared.
 

DarkPanda XIII

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Nov 3, 2009
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*slips out of the sewer*

Didn't actually hear of it, but glad that I didn't I guess.

But seriously, people have been giving you crap? It's easy! Anytime you actually say 'don't get it', then it's the negative. If you piss on it but never say 'don't get it' then it's mediocre and can be tried....*shrugs*

At least that's my take on it.

*goes back to the sewer*
 

NinjaDeathSlap

Leaf on the wind
Feb 20, 2011
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It's sad really. I mean, the concept of a shooter with added mind control into the tactical flavour actually sounds really interesting, so it must take a REALLY sucky game to make that no fun. Just imagine all of the cool stuff you could do if a game premise like that was done properly:

If there were several enemies behind cover in close proximity to one another you could possess one, then get them to detonate a grenade martyrdom style and kill all the enemies in one move.

There could be stealth sections, and if a guard spots you you could possess him and make him radio in again saying it was a false alarm.

See, all you would really need is a decent plot, lots of fun angles to approach the mind control aspect from, and AI smart enough to level the playing field so the mind control doesn't make it too easy, and you've got a good game right there.

There is no excuse for a game with this much potential to suck.
 

psivamp

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Jan 7, 2010
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dathwampeer said:
As soon as I saw the trailer I knew it'd suck.


Watch Ghost in the shell much mr game designer?
Holy carp, that's bad. At least there's some subtlety in Ghost in the Shell.

HellspawnCandy said:
Even though Square Enix only published this game, it's making me wary of how Human Revolution will turn out. If they have faith in a game as bad as this I'm getting scared.
At least the cinematic and gameplay trailers for Human Revolution are good. I'm pretty confident that Human Revolution will be a decent game -- I'm reserving judgement on whether or not I accept it as a prequel to Deus Ex.
 

Lunar Templar

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Sep 20, 2009
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ever see something so bad, even the trailer couldn't make it sound good

that would be this game, the official trailer did more to turn me off this game the Yahtzee could ever hope to

it's kinda a like some one itemizing reasons to hate twilight actually, you knew it was gonna suck ahead of time, now you've just got more reasons to burn it at the stake
 

Hachura

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Nov 28, 2007
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This is the best review from the last few months.

BAD BAD BAD BAD DON'T DON'T DON'T PLAY IT.
 

esliang

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Nov 18, 2009
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Honestly it IS sometimes hard to see how much Yahtzee dislikes (or likes) a game. Then again, his trademark is being nit-picky, so there you go I guess.

Anyway, I thought this review was the most clever one in a long time. The game sounds disastrous, so Yahtzee probably just saved me another 50-60 bucks.
 

MattAn24

Pulse l'Cie
Jul 16, 2009
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AgentBJ09 said:
Thanks a ton Square, for making another badly done game. As if FF XIV wasn't a bad enough way to end 2010. Piece of advice: Stop making games for a while and focus your efforts on single projects. I think you need it at this point.
As someone else kindly mentioned to Yahtzee above.. SQUARE ENIX DID NOT DEVELOP MINDJACK. FeelPlus did. Square Enix merely slapped their publisher title on it. That's all.

Regarding FFXIV, also kindly STFU. Yes, I also gave up on playing it. Until Hiromichi "I single-handedly fucked up FFXI AND FFXIV, yet I only just decided to admit it NOW" Tanaka was swiftly booted from the producer/director role. The new guy that replaced him is.. Actually.. I can't believe I'm even saying this, after playing FFXI for 5 years and barely tolerating the vague, bullshit updates there.. He's actually DOING something. He's regularly writing directly to the players, conducting frequent surveys and polls about what players want and the majority of it has.. Been added or is in the process of being added. It's rather weird to even see it happening.

Hell, the new FFXI development team is doing the same thing and have FINALLY given its players a MUCH easier/time efficient way of leveling, rather than solely grinding 6-man experience parties at one set camp site. I don't play FFXI anymore, but from what I've seen, it's definitely improved.

But yes, I never bothered with MindJack, but it's not because it's "a Square Enix game". It merely has their name on it as publisher. Hell, using Yahtzee's logic, Just Cause 2 is a Square Enix game! OH FUCKING SNAP.