Zero Punctuation: Resident Evil: Umbrella Chronicles

[Chalee]

Warning - review request Below

Yahtzee you MUST review the football manager series! The comic potential is huge! Think of all the spreadsheet jokes you could sneak in. Also you could have a valid excuse for making loads of pro-liverpool comments and anti-manU jibes, without having to go off on a tangent like you did last time... YAHTZEE FOR FOOTIE MAN REVIEW WAAAAAAAA

 

[moero]

That was awesome... I hope he won't review every shitty first person shooter so the reviews won't become boring.

 

[Allan Foe]

If Big Y really reviews COD4 next, I bet it'll be MOH's "Damn those yanks and their foreign policy issues" again (at least there's a Brit in the game this time).

Reviewing Burnout Paradise? There's no characters, no plot, no social\political issues... That'd be either one very dull or very short review. Plus the content of fullyramblomatic.com gave me the impression that Yahtzee doesn't care much for racing games (at least not enough to state his opinion about them).

And while I'm at it I might as well predict that if Arthur "Ben Croshaw" Yahtzee makes a "No More Heros" review it won't be a very favorable one (cue complaints about repetitive "random stick waggling"-type gameplay).

P.S. Um, on the "football manager" thingy:
"There's a bit in this review where I mix the titles of games with numbers on the end with football results for comic effect, eg "Team Fortress 2; Liverpool 3". This seems to have given many correspondents the unintended impression that I am in any way into football. Well, sorry to disappoint, but I find football utterly tedious and people who like it doubly so. Just wanted to clear that up." - Yahtzee

 

[entropy3ko]

No, Yahtzee, no! Don't review Call Of Duty 4! Don't let the whiners win! It'll just encourage them!

A friend of mine is playing CoD 4 and is all enthousiastic about it... this makes me suspicious uhmm uhmm...

Uhm... I am curious to see where Big Y (tnx Allan Foe!) will go next. It would be nice to see a real time strategy game (since he has not reviewed one yet) or maybe "Pet Vet 3D: Animal Hospital Down Under" LOL

 

[Dectilon]

"Yes it's all silly, but most myths are anyway. What's sillier, Carlos and giant spiders or Heracles' final demise stemming from, literally, a bloody shirt? "

The difference is that Homeros (or whatever his real name was) was a good enough writer to make anything seem interesting. Resident Evil is... well... the name itself seems out of place. Sounds more like a ghost story than a zombie-splatter game.

"I knew he was going to review CoD4 sooner or later, I saw him playing it two weeks ago (He's on my Steam friends list, suck on that )"

For how much longer after that remark, I wonder ^^

*purrrs with a big smile*

This one made me giggle muchly at my office desk. Top form Yahtzee! The only down is the recurring "censored wanking"-anims, they are kind of... tacky. Everything else though: thumbs up!

/S

You know that somewhere, on some server made from nothing but evil, there's an uncencored version... : )

 

[Chalee]

If Big Y really reviews COD4 next, I bet it'll be MOH's "Damn those yanks and their foreign policy issues" again (at least there's a Brit in the game this time).

Reviewing Burnout Paradise? There's no characters, no plot, no social\political issues... That'd be either one very dull or very short review. Plus the content of fullyramblomatic.com gave me the impression that Yahtzee doesn't care much for racing games (at least not enough to state his opinion about them).

And while I'm at it I might as well predict that if Arthur "Ben Croshaw" Yahtzee makes a "No More Heros" review it won't be a very favorable one (cue complaints about repetitive "random stick waggling"-type gameplay).

P.S. Um, on the "football manager" thingy:
"There's a bit in this review where I mix the titles of games with numbers on the end with football results for comic effect, eg "Team Fortress 2; Liverpool 3". This seems to have given many correspondents the unintended impression that I am in any way into football. Well, sorry to disappoint, but I find football utterly tedious and people who like it doubly so. Just wanted to clear that up." - Yahtzee

Is that meant to dissuade me from nagging for an FM review? I'm actually more excited about the idea now that I know he said that REVIEW FM!

 

[Allan Foe]

Is that meant to dissuade me from nagging for an FM review? I'm actually more excited about the idea now that I know he said that REVIEW FM!

By no means. Just a friendly word of caution there.

Oh, and before I forget:
'RUNAWAY TRAIN' by Soul Asylum is actually about a man being absorbed into the vagina of an evil shapeshifting alien [http://www.fullyramblomatic.com/essays/runaway.htm], an insight into meaningful song lyrics by your favorite game reviewer. It seems appropriate.

 

[Chalee]

Thanks for the tip I WANT yahtzee to rip into footie manager, so I guess there's no need for too many warnings though

(he'd lose any credibility as a human being if he expressed the merest dislike towards fm...OF COURSE)

 

[broadband]

Resident Evil is... well... the name itself seems out of place. Sounds more like a ghost story than a zombie-splatter game.

the original name of the game was Biohazard, but for some stupid reason the US censoring organizations changed it to Resident evil for the west, the original name has more sense.

 

[Vortigar]

What was up the incessant mentioning of Jill's occupation?
That mini-skirt screams mega-slut like no other though.
They should've kept her in pants...

CoD4? I don't need a review on that.
I want to know what he's got to say about Burnout taking away the menu screen.

Allen Foe:
Characters/plot/development, uhm, he did Mario Galaxy right?

 

[Rodge]

'IM A RITER' made me laugh Pepsi. Well, the whole thing made me laugh, but that made me laugh right after I'd had a drink.

As for the next review, I'm still pushing for Barbie Horse Adventures. (Or Mother 3. Ooh, or Star Control 2!)

 

[Hawkzor]

One of of favorite reviews so far, keep it up Yahtzee!

 

[KIFulgore]

Major props on the suave usage of "Jill sandwich!"

 

[LegsyWegsy]

this was an awesome as usual review, i reckon you shouldnt do all these popular games like COD4, go back to your Psychonauts roots and choose a new inventive game like Search for Barborossas treasure or No More Heroes

Also, i would REALLY like to see another intro theatre cause i laughed so hard at that!

 

[kenflipkick]

my school has blocked videoegg, and also proxies don't generally work. is there any mirror or other way of viewing the videos? I love zero punctuation and wish I could get it here! thanks

 

[The Rogue Wolf]

"Umbrella Chronicles is a heavily cut-down retread of three of the major Resident Evil games, starring Johnny Bravo, a prostitute, an idiot, a mullet, a nine-year-old boy, a brick shithouse, and Carlos."

"Mmmm... mutagen-y...."

It seems like Yahtzee's back in full stride and hitting every note. I especially loved the "zombie kitten's corrosive piddle" bit, and for some reason the picture of Little Yahtzee with the old NES Zapper made me crack up.

Hmm... maybe there's a future in an "Adventures of Little Yahtzee" franchise! Who's with me?

...

Hello?

Is this thing on?

 

[Zanaxal]

These reviews are the only reviews of games in the world as far as i´m concerned.

as fot the game, Well wouldnt touch the game with a ten foot pole..

Review a strategy game for the master race pc gamer.

 

[swatmajor1]

Another great review. Thank you for filling in my day with a good series of laughs. And, will there be another "Intro Sequence Theatre" clip coming up soon?

Well, good luck in the future!!

 

[billy-j]

so true, loved the bit about the dialogue

P.S. did anyone notice he nearly ran out of breath at about 1.35?

certainly did :-D nice to know even yahtzee cant go on and on forever, even tho id like to beleive that he did the entire review in one breath :-D

seems i proved that Yahtzee is human after all lol!