Zero Punctuation: Super Smash Bros. Brawl

[DarthTirith]

781 posts, Jesus. Ben is the most epic troll ever.

 

[Xenoveritas]

I think his review was very accurate cause I can't and will never see the "depth" behind Smash Bros.

There isn't any. Or at least, there isn't supposed to be. One of the reason that Subspace Emissary sucks is because they tried to add depth to a game that doesn't need any. Another reason is because they tried to tell a story where the only spoken line of dialog comes from Snake and is "kept you waiting, huh?" when you finally unlock him.

The entire point behind Smash Bros. is to have various game icons beating each other up. That's it. There is no depth beyond that. Don't try looking for any, you won't find it.

It's not a serious fighting game. It's designed to allow a bunch of friends to have fun with it. Because of that, the matches are extremely random. This is caused by random item spawns and random events that occur based on stage. So matches can be decided by luck as much as skill, and that's the point.

And that's it. There's nothing further. Just Nintendo characters + Snake + Sonic fighting for no real reason.

 

[NoPantsMan]

that was good, and you've got guts to say that considering how rabid nintendo fans are.

First I'd like to say I did like the original smash brothers. It still stands as the one game i've played with the highest fun/time ratio. However I can tell you what I didn't like about it by how I would eliminate half the items the game would drop from the game options menu, and the sequel went further with this by adding unnecessary graphics (such as by making the background move all over the place) and giving the characters even more flashy attacks. I haven't even played this version yet, but I'd understand if it got worse.

Oh, and thank you for addressing "that guy". Gaming culture should feel nothing over contributing to the sex and violence all other media perpetuate, but it should be held fully responsible for creating these types of people.

 

[Singing Gremlin]

I'm sure this post is going to be lost in the massive shitstorm of Nintendo fanboys (and equally as pathetic, anti-nintendofanboys) but I have to say one thing that I hope eventually gets to Yahtzee.

This is about the third time (or so) that you have reviewed a game that people were constantly nagging you about. Don't you see the cycle you are creating for yourself? You're encourging them to keep doing it! In fact, I'm sure the next fanboy obsessed game to come out you're going to have even MORE spam about it.

Then again, I'm not sure what's worse... the fact that you're encouraging them, or the fact that they haven't caught on that when you NAG Yahtzee to review a game, he's likely going to fucking hate it. I'm sure you know just as well as I do, their intentions when they send in these requests. They want you to praise it like some holy grail of the new era... never does happen.

So I say... do what you want, that is... unless that's throwing some more meat into the lion's pen. Let them starve, and make their own goddamn review videos on YouTube (As long as it doesn't consist of them wanking off to their television screen.)

Eventually they'll leave you alone... and in the end, we can all be happy hearing reviews similar to those in the "early days" (Ugh, I can't believe I'm using that phrase, it's not like it's been more than a few months.)

Unfortunately, the internet is a giant matrix-style breeding vat for idiots. The old ones may get bored, but there will always be new ones to nag.

 

[Dobbinatrix]

His arguments are backed up, yes, but he doesn't really say anything good about games he reviews nowadays. Anything resembling a redeeming point is just a feint so that he can rape it some more.

have u seen his psyconaughts review, also if you have played condemed and thencondemed 2 u can see how much he wanted condemed 2 to be great, and gave it a very positive review (for the first half)
tbh he was right when he said "it isnt a game you can review" at least not without going in to crazy depth about who your favorit character is and why ness is so horrible broken, and nobody wants to hear that.

i laughed myself silly at this review and was very happy he didnt cop out and make a really short one as you are sort of forcced to do in a game with no plot


also what do u mean u like to piss off your friends? good freinds they must be, sounds to me like your "that guy"

 

[ArchmageDale]

You know, this is almost slightly off topic here, but as someone who almost never actually posts in online forums, as an outsider looking in, I find the monkey see-monkey do reaction to be sociologically interesting. Good example: The Subspace Emissary. Quite fun adventure game, especially when considering the fact that the entire thing can be played co-op with a friend with a fun little story. Until I came here I had heard nothing but positive things about it, but Yahtzee said that he thought it was boring and same-y (as I've stated before, doubtless a judgment he made off of playing the first two levels of a 15-hour game) and suddenly everybody and their brother mysteriously agrees and is an expert on it, including people who by their own admission (like Yahtzee) haven't even played it.

Just an observation I made. That was really what I got on here to talk about in the first place. People who make a judgment of a game based on 5 minutes of play, or better yet, based entirely on gossip they heard without touching the game at all make me shake my head. And I'm talking about all games here, not just Smash Bros.

 

[Another Fan]

You know, this is almost slightly off topic here, but as someone who almost never actually posts in online forums, as an outsider looking in, I find the monkey see-monkey do reaction to be sociologically interesting. Good example: The Subspace Emissary. Quite fun adventure game, especially when considering the fact that the entire thing can be played co-op with a friend with a fun little story. Until I came here I had heard nothing but positive things about it, but Yahtzee said that he thought it was boring and same-y (as I've stated before, doubtless a judgment he made off of playing the first two levels of a 15-hour game) and suddenly everybody and their brother mysteriously agrees and is an expert on it, including people who by their own admission (like Yahtzee) haven't even played it.

Just an observation I made. That was really what I got on here to talk about in the first place. People who make a judgment of a game based on 5 minutes of play, or better yet, based entirely on gossip they heard without touching the game at all make me shake my head. And I'm talking about all games here, not just Smash Bros.

Uh, sorry to point this out, but he played the entire Adventure Mode. He references one of the final levels in it in the whole play it twice thing. The Great Maze is really the only part you have to do levels over again.

Though the point that others make a decision based on hearsay is fairly valid. But not very important.

 

[Kaname13]

Oh, and as far as people who "got offended by it being fucking idiots," well that was probably because he pretty much came right out and said "this game is stupid, and if you like it you are stupid." Actually, I think his exact wording was "jibbering fanboy twats," or something close to it. So, yes, I was mildly offended... because he was directly insulting me. That's kind of the textbook definition of being offended. Negative reviews are fine, but when you start directly stating that a person is stupid for their tastes in games (something that members of gaming culture are notoriously bad about) that's when you've crossed the line.

'Gibbering fanboy twats' = those legions of SSBB fans, who, when insulted, will generate almost 800 posts, hundreds more than when Yahtzee offends any other fanbase

yes, i think gibbering suits nicely, 'twats' perhaps to far

Well half of the posters here are people saying how much SSBB/Nintendo Sucks.

 

[Portoparty]

I think its safe to say that this game was made for teh japanese... and noone else... because otherwise they would put in more recognizable flipping characters!

 

[144_v1legacy]

According to Sakurai (and not according to me, so don't make fun, unless you want to make fun of me for quoting Sakurai), the reason they have so few known characters is because when they included the fire emblem characters, originally an obscured series Americans had no knowledge of (myself included), in melee, it sparked an interest in fire emblem in foreign countries, and so they're hoping this will work this time around too. Or something.

 

[Telekinesis]

What unknown characters are you two even talking about?
Name ONE newcomer in this game that is unknown in the US, aside from Lucas.
Time's up, there isn't. Even the new Fire Emblem character, Ike, is fairly popular in the US, having BOTH of his games localized here.
[And they sold nicely if I might add]

Anyways, great review. I have to say that it felt more like a complaint about fighting games in general and other unimportant things, but that's what makes your reviews funny instead of sleep-inducing like most "serious" reviewers.

Also, the Mother 3 part was great, and so true.
Speaking of which, I wonder if you have heard of the Mother 3 fan translation currently in progress?

 

[RPJesus]

Even the new Fire Emblem character, Ike, is fairly popular in the US, having BOTH of his games localized here.

Well duh, don't you listen to the audience cheers? They like Ike.
Although metaknight and wario might qualify for obscurity. Metaknight's only been in like 3 of kirby's games, and wario's only really well known for warioware. I didn't know who the fuck lucario was, other than "a pokeman" Olimar and Ness are relatively unknown as well. Also, ROB.

 

[smallharmlesskitten]

Best review yet and shut up fanboys

 

[The Thief]

You know, this is almost slightly off topic here, but as someone who almost never actually posts in online forums, as an outsider looking in, I find the monkey see-monkey do reaction to be sociologically interesting. Good example: The Subspace Emissary. Quite fun adventure game, especially when considering the fact that the entire thing can be played co-op with a friend with a fun little story. Until I came here I had heard nothing but positive things about it, but Yahtzee said that he thought it was boring and same-y (as I've stated before, doubtless a judgment he made off of playing the first two levels of a 15-hour game) and suddenly everybody and their brother mysteriously agrees and is an expert on it, including people who by their own admission (like Yahtzee) haven't even played it.

I didn't like it before Yahtzee said he disliked it. In fact, I disagree with alot of the things he said in this review, but still agree with him there. It was just a frustrating experience. I don't think I ever would have finished if it weren't that I could get starwolf, and that's probably why I didn't enjoy it; I only played it to unlock him, jig, and Toon link. So playing through 15 hours of near identicle levels with characters who I had no idea how to play was pretty annoying.

It think it could have been more fun for me if I'd done it later, after I had played each character for a while and learned their basics, but I wanted to get the secret characters faster. So I guess I only ruined it for myself.

 

[Joined to vote Valve]

Although metaknight and wario might qualify for obscurity. Metaknight's only been in like 3 of kirby's games, and wario's only really well known for warioware. I didn't know who the fuck lucario was, other than "a pokeman" Olimar and Ness are relatively unknown as well. Also, ROB.

MetaKnight- I decided I would play as him a year before Brawl came out because of Kirby Super Star and other stuff. He is not obscure.
Wario- The only games where I have played with him involved weren't warioware, and everybody at least knows who he is.
Lucario- Never heard of him, but everybody with a DS has.
Olimar- Nintendo makes an original game and character to shut up people who complain about rehashing and nobody cares. Sounds like some people need to shut up.
Ness- I only know him from this series, but that still means about ten years.
ROB- Shame on you.

 

[SatansBestBuddy]

I still haven't gotten a Wii, and I've been looking for a good 8 months now.

 

[JDMS]

I just wanted to say that Yahtzee touched a nerve here. Actually, I think he punched an entire spinal cord, 800 comments?

Chill out guys... It's only a game.

Good review by the way.

 

[stompy]

23 pages... you guys are nearly on the verge of beating the Zombie RP. I don't know whether to congratulate or condemn you guys... Really, WTF?

- A procrastinator

 

[Plays2]

This thread has gone so far...

Seriously? almost more than 800 posts in this thread just because Yahtzee hated a game that he didn't wanted to review.

Well, that's what you get for nagging to Yahtzee which game he needs to review.

Chill guys. It's only a goddamn game, the world is not going to end if someone says something wrong about that "gem"...

P.S: It was a good review indeed.