Zero Punctuation: XBLA Double Bill

[Fortyseven203]

Yeah, but BC:Rearmed _did_ update the original in a lot of ways without ruining the spirit of the thing:

Among other things, the health meter is a lot more forgiving, the frustrating radio receiver guessing game is gone, infinite continues, grenades, the weapon system is completely overhauled and you can swap weapons in-level, instead of having to pick a particular layout when you're deployed onto a map.

Grin did a fantastic job on BC:R and for fans of the original it's been a great treat.

However, I can easily see the uninitiated (like Yahtzee, apparently) finding it to be a frustrating throwback. (Imagine if he was forced to play the original.)

I haven't read all the posts here, so forgive me if I'm the 16th person so say this, but the original Bionic Commando is still quite enjoyable today. It's certainly not a rose-colored glasses thing; not for those who really appreciated how different a title it was back then.

Of course, if you've never played the damned game in your life and your first exposure to it is literally 20 years after it was first published, yeah, it'll seem a bit crusty. And any attempt to remake it will only come off as applying a cosmetic product containing pigments, oils, waxes, and emollients that applies color and texture to a porcine's oral sphincter.

 

[TaboriHK]

It's not a failed joke because it got a reaction. Some people rightfully had a chuckle, and some idiots actually took offense, 70 years and 900 billion Hitler jokes later. If any Hitler joke seriously shocks you to your core, you don't go outside and interact with people enough. Are you people kidding me? I've heard abortion jokes today that makes Yahtzee's Hitler crack insignificant.

 

[Jimmyjames]

Wow,that was the first Zero Punctuation I've liked in quite some time. Sounds like Yahtzee's been reading the comments and is getting back to what made him good.

 

[sorry user name taken.]

It's not a failed joke because it got a reaction. Some people rightfully had a chuckle, and some idiots actually took offense, 70 years and 900 billion Hitler jokes later. If any Hitler joke seriously shocks you to your core, you don't go outside and interact with people enough. Are you people kidding me? I've heard abortion jokes today that makes Yahtzee's Hitler crack insignificant.

I could care less about the Hitler part. The whole video in general was just bad, and unfunny.

my review on this to is also ''meh'' just wait till big releases come out

 

[GLaDOS V 2.1]

Another honest and hilarious review.

 

[gasto]

Today's games are rotating in circles too. I think Yahtzee made that clear at the end credits, where he is digging the quick-time events, forseeing the future to come, when quick-time events will be seen as cool retro-gaming features.

Long live Ben.

 

[Vromnir]

Meh. Yahtzee, you seriously need a vacation, man. I hate to say it, but ZP is going downhill for the last few episodes. I didn't even smile at this one.

It's not about quoting Yahtzee to death, or getting used to his jokes. Hell, I was watching the series from the very first episodes, and it was awesome until a few weeks earlier. ZP had it's ups and downs, but this one is different. It's getting shallow and repetitive, with Yahtzee doing nothing but playing Captain Obvious and hating at the wrong direction. That Hitler "joke" wasn't funny at all, for example. Forced, bumpy and semi-boring, ZP is running out of juice fast.

You need a refill, Yahtzee, go have a brake for a few weeks, seriously. Yeah, we will miss the show for the time being, but it will be all for the better, and we'll get some good 'ol ZP power when you get back.

I think you are perhaps missing the point. Yahtzee is reviewing games - not producing a comedy series. While his general rantings are amusing he is first and foremost reviewing the game. I personally like to watch ZP to pick up on the stuff that IGN and the like miss out in their rantings about normal mapping, polygons and vertexes.

Huh. Never thought about it that way before, it just seemed like he was reviewing these games to be funny.

 

[gasto]

By the way, Ben, if you think this world is poluted with hedonistic perverts that want to go to bed with retro games or ... you, don't feel you re the only one. Hehe.

 

[Vromnir]

Best review since the Mailbag Showdown. Not only did he deliver crisp, sharp-as-knives criticism and wit he also raised very good points about how nostalgia can cloud our better judgment towards video games.

Excellent job, man!

What was the Hitler comment at the end all about? lol

I must agree. Up until now I thought you were one of the most intelligent people on this planet. Then you make a shitty comment like "Hitler was right". What was that for? That was not funny. That was not cool. When did you become Mel Gibson. If you said it for any other reason other than you thought it was funny it makes you are horrible excuse for a human being, and yes, if anyone who heard it thought it was funny, you are an asshole too.

Hey, man! Being an asshole isn't an easy job. It's not like you can just make up a smarmy remark and sell it to the people. You have to deliver with just the right tone and at the appropriate time. Also, it needs to be something original yet totally, totally true.

Lol perfect comeback.

 

[niall27]

A bit funnier than usual, but more importantly, I love it when people wail on reminiscence in gaming.

To all the people inevitably defending Ocarina of Time: Stop being dickbags.

EDIT: The constant, and usual stream of people saying ZMG YATZEY U NOT FUNAY NEMORE has, for this episode only, gone from frustrating to hilarious because YOU'RE PROOVING THE EXACT POINT HE'S MENTIONING IN THE FUCKING VIDEO.

He isn't getting less funny, you twats have all just ruined it by quoting him five thousand times a day and thus becoming too used to his style. I, however, haven't been going around quoting him at every waking moment as if he was Monty Python, Maddox, Chapelle or anyone else nearly-ruined by constant quotation, and thus I still find him hilarious.

None to blame but yourselves.

Well sorry now mate but you can bugger right off with that.

I have never once in my life quoted Yahtzee or whatever his name is. I come on every wednesday watch and then forget about it. He's just lost that special touch he had. people are right, before he was being a bitter old bastard now he's just being an arrogant arse-hole for the sake of being an arrogant arse-hole

 

[Vromnir]

Fuck it, I'm leaving the escapist and I'm never going to watch another Yahtzee review again. To all of those Yahtzee fanboys who their cock right up near Yahtzee's tiny cock, fuck yourselfs. I'm obviously doing to intentionally get the banhammer. God, to believe I used to like Yahtzee.

To that Bobisonlybob, I know a couple of gaming websites with critics who give a fairer review and honest review than Yahtzee could ever make. Gamecritics.com, Giantbomb.com, firingsquad.com, gamedailybiz.com, destructoid.com, and mygamer.com.

I also want to make one last statement to Yahtzee; You're an asshole of the weak.

Just asking, What was the point of posting that?

 

[gasto]

To all those mindless posters claiming that the Hitler affirmation was 'too much'.

First of all what do you think, 'Hitler was right' means?

Not even historians would be able to answer because Hitler believed in many things, not only in torturing Jewish(which is the first thing that passed through those mindless cunts).

Hitler was a psicologist, and was a very profound person. I guess nobody would of jumped from their seat, if Yahtzee affirmed 'Harry S Truman was right'.

And he obviously made a trap for you nostalgia gamers, moral of the story: "don't blindly believe in something, just because it wears a label".

Hitler wears the "past" label. Just because he was from the past doesn't mean he didn't participate in the Holocaust.

Bionic Commando: rearmed, and the rest wear the "retro-game" label. Just because they are retro (and retro snobs 'must' love it) doesn't mean they don't carry the retro-faults.

 

[yourkie1921]

"He admits he does. And he picked up Painkiller recently before he reviewed it, or atleast somewhat recently since he found it after it went to the bargain bin"

Really? I thought he said he played it when it was new as well : /

Either way it was at most 3 years ago.

 

[Stcb]

Having read the comments resulting from this video, I feel dumber.

Was everyone oblivious to his point about RELATIVITY? ROSE-TINTED glasses? He likes Twilight Princess and Mario Sunshine because they WERE THE FIRST 3D GAMES IN THOSE SERIES HE PLAYED.

He then goes on to declare "ALSO HITLER WAS RIGHT" because Hitler was the FIRST CONQUERING FACIST he knew presumably, therefore IT MUST BE RIGHT, are you understanding the hypocrisy of loving your past so tightly now? He's being deliberately hypocritical to make a point, and people are STILL jumping down his throat, even with his two-seconds-later disclaimer. The point is that YOU LOVE YOUR PAST and therefore like things you've liked before. So companies make games that cash in on this.

Hell, I still love FFVII, and I know deep down than graphically it's poor, the villian is bland, the main character's a mess and sorting him out is more effort than it's worth, and most of the support cast are one-shtick stereotypes tucked into their own nice backstory that's usually mutually exclusive to everyone else. Yet it's still MY FAVOURITE and if they remade it flawlessly, preserving everything I loved from the first with shiny new graphics and the same old materia system minus the glitches, I would pay full price for it, because my perspective is skewed and I know it and enjoy it.

Also there's a ton of things about 2D/3D playspaces and 2D/3D graphics. Castle Crashers has 2D graphics and a 3D playspace (up into background/down into foreground, left/right, and jumping up/down, 3 axis, 3D). This results in the 2-pixel miss-wiggle nonsense that should've stopped with Golden Axe. Bionic Commando has 3D graphics and 2D gameplay (left/right, grapple up/down). What's the point of the wasteful 3D on bland 2D gameplay that has barely been refined? Giving nostalgia a fresh coat of paint. That's it. There's no other benefit except maybe to appease people who detest anything that looks old, in which case they'll probably hate it once they start playing it anyway.

Yahtzee has never been wrong - you just have to be on the same level of insane, ultra-self-aware, reflexive mentality as him to see why. Everything is wonderful and shiny, everything is made of shit. But I see very little wonderful and shiny in the forum posts above me, and now look what you've made me done. I've written a horrible, bitter little rant and now I'm one of you gibbering idiots claiming to understand what's going through Yahtzee's head. Fuck it. I have no clue, I just think he's got a point and here's my understanding of it. In his own words, if you don't like it, fuck off.

Cocks.

I think this guy "got it".

By the way, what if what he actually said was "Hitler was WRIGHT" - coming of his Spore review, that would actually make a lot of sense. Or maybe it wouldn't, but still.

While I enjoy the debating that's going on in this topic, I think you guys are reading way too much into what is essentially a parody of the serious video game reviewing community. The "Hitler was right!" comment was in there to prove that the last part, if not all of the video relating to classic gaming automatically being bad was at least partly sarcastic.

Or perhaps he really does like TP better than OOT, which I can respect, but not agree with. If you really care, I've let a total of three friends up to this point borrow both TP and then OOT, and they all enjoyed Ocarina much more. The most cited reason was the story, level design, items, and, most of all, originality. Don't get me wrong here; Twilight Princess is a wonderful game that probably deserves a spot in the Top 25, but it still can't touch what is widely considered by video game critics to be the best game ever made.

 

[bodyklok]

brilliant as always keep um up

 

[Safe-Keeper]

I hear ya on the nostalgia bit Yahtzee.

I loved Police Quest as a child (had it on my 386), and then suddenly one day it no longer worked. I missed it for years, until finding it on Abandonia or somesuch. Loaded it up, saw how horrible the graphics were, and shut it down in disappointment after ten minutes.

 

[SiirusNagisa]

Nice to see that BC was properly reamed... and I love how you take the opportunity to rip the atrocity that is Halo3 every chance you get... although I'm surprised castle crashers got such a short and painful review.

No love for the collection aspect? 15 ingame pets with various abilities, 40 different weapons, 16 unlockable characters... Also I think I heard one line referring to the imaginitive art and humor style - coming from a man who constantly argues that video games are losing flavor as an art form, this was an opportunity to rave about a game that finally took a step in the right direction while giving us the same 4 player beat-em-up action that we enjoyed as coin-pilfering children (ex: turtles in time). And on the topic of nostalgia, there WERE good games back then, I don't think anyone can knock the original Sonic games and actually mean it.

I'm hoping you played up to more than the first boss, Yahtzee, else you're missing out on a ton more than you think. BTW, Who played golden axe for more than like 10 minutes, anyway? seriously, that game was terribad.

EDIT:
Also, am I the only person who noticed "Most Definitely Does NOT think Hitler was right" in the credits?

 

[Aptspire]

"That last sentence contained massive amounts of sarcasm" GLaDOS-esque

 

[Pyrokinesis]

I know there is a lack of new titles out there but now were reviewing games that your adv joe has not a clue what they are... almost seems like your stalling... Well none the less you really have a way for trolling, provoking every zelda fan, and Hitler enthusiast to spam your mail box. But who am i to judge. Id just like some more reviews on the adv joe game that most people know about. Starwars FU seemes like a good title to go for. Armored core series? Ace combat series? Maybe even the final fantasy series if you feel the need to get your hate mail to over 9000.