A Fanboy's Guide to Fanboying

[Outright Villainy]

I always like these kind of articles, but it's so much funnier reading the replies of people who completely miss the satire.

*munches popcorn*

 

[DiscoAtThePanic]

You just don't get it. A real Fangirl or guy knows whats best based entirely on how they and their favorite game designer feel about a game, not on all that "merits and flaws" junk!

 

[Unesh52]

Lolz, he acted like the wrong stuff was right, but I saw what he did there

yeah... everybody knows the internet was actually invented for porn. Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go correct some idiot on the reviews section who said Halo: Reach is overrated.

 

[GiantRedButton]

My sarcasm detector is going off the charts!

A sarcasm detector... What a useful invention. cookie for reference

 

[The Random One]

I see what you did there.

It's always a good idea to keep a (preferrably imaginary) fanboy by your side at all times. Whenever you're posting an opinion, imagine his poorly worded rebuttal. If you can't counter that with a reasonable explanation you know you don't know this topic as well as you think you do.

 

[Gudrests]

What else am I going to do? Let them continue being wrong?

no its is your job as a human being to set them right....damn morons thinking diffrently than you

 

[JPH330]

The count is:

Seriously, it's baffling that anybody wouldn't recognize the satire in this, after having read the whole thing. It's not surprising that people would read a bit of it, and then assume what the rest says. The whole TL/DR trend gets really old, but at least you have a bit of an excuse as to why you completely missed the point.

 

[Samurai Goomba]

Heh heh, nice. I quite enjoyed this article. I have to say, I've been chatting with folks about my Other M impressions based mostly on what I've heard about the game, so I've heard most of these points used by fans of Other M to refute my complaints about how the game looks, at first glance, utterly horrible.

I mean, I'm willing to allow Other M might be brilliant, but based on everything I've seen or heard about the game, it looks rubbish. Especially compared to the high watermark of the Metroid serie-

Drat, now I'm doing it, too. Is there no way to escape the curse of the fanboy?

 

[Baldr]

Game journalist hold some power of persuasion to consumers for any given product. I don't care whether it is fanboyism or not, if you work for a legitimate media organization and misrepresent a product, you are ethically liable and people should be aware of this.
Not to mention the journalist scum who get paid to write bad reviews by competing studios.

 

[mjc0961]

So, how to avoid the wrath of fanboys: don't post an opinion. Got it. I kinda knew that already though, but you get loads of points for the awesome way you said it.

You also forgot the "can't judge a game until you've played through until the end even if the first part is atrociously bad." (see the FF13 comments under Yahtzee's review)

Invalidated by the fact that he straight up told you at the start that he only played five hours. It's not like he was trying to fool anyone into thinking he played the entire thing and wanted them to think it was a shit festival from start to finish.

And also, he's right. Something bad getting better later doesn't excuse the bad part. For the 20 hours I'd have to waste to get to the "good" part of FF13, I could just play another game that's good from start to finish. And I will choose the other game every time, because I'm in this to have fun, not to be bored and annoyed.

 

[Irridium]

So whats the count at now? 13?

 

[Skipper3]

This kind of made my annoyed reading this. Iunno why. Strange..

 

[Teucrian]

I thought this was a rather sad little article, and not particularly well thought out. I've got no problem with satire, but you don't offer anything constructive. Worse, some of your points are valid complaints that fans or prospective owners of games may make to a reviewer. The overall tone, however, is that of a petulant preteen just discovering sarcasm. I hope your articles return to their previous quality.

 

[schroing]

New rule; use strawmen as often as possible.

You clearly understand every facet of your target's simple, uneducated logic, so making up their arguments for them to speed up the discussion is a no-brainer.

 

[nik3daz]

So, how to avoid the wrath of fanboys: don't post an opinion. Got it. I kinda knew that already though, but you get loads of points for the awesome way you said it.

You also forgot the "can't judge a game until you've played through until the end even if the first part is atrociously bad." (see the FF13 comments under Yahtzee's review)

Invalidated by the fact that he straight up told you at the start that he only played five hours. It's not like he was trying to fool anyone into thinking he played the entire thing and wanted them to think it was a shit festival from start to finish.

And also, he's right. Something bad getting better later doesn't excuse the bad part. For the 20 hours I'd have to waste to get to the "good" part of FF13, I could just play another game that's good from start to finish. And I will choose the other game every time, because I'm in this to have fun, not to be bored and annoyed.

I'm not saying he's wrong. He's a gamer reviewer, not a quality assurance guy. Nothing says he has to play the game to its conclusion.

Heh, what about games that go to shit after few hours. I'd hate to have bought Indigo Prophecy (or Fahrenheit) because of a half0spirited reviewer that didn't bother to play up to the half of the game where the story (and hence the gameplay) went to shit.

How would you know a game was good from start to finish unless the reviewer played it completely?

Maybe reviewers should be more upfront about how much of a game they played (usually they are anyways).

 

[Scuzzymcfi]

So, how to avoid the wrath of fanboys: don't post an opinion. Got it. I kinda knew that already though, but you get loads of points for the awesome way you said it.

You also forgot the "can't judge a game until you've played through until the end even if the first part is atrociously bad." (see the FF13 comments under Yahtzee's review)

Invalidated by the fact that he straight up told you at the start that he only played five hours. It's not like he was trying to fool anyone into thinking he played the entire thing and wanted them to think it was a shit festival from start to finish.

And also, he's right. Something bad getting better later doesn't excuse the bad part. For the 20 hours I'd have to waste to get to the "good" part of FF13, I could just play another game that's good from start to finish. And I will choose the other game every time, because I'm in this to have fun, not to be bored and annoyed.

I'm not saying he's wrong. He's a gamer reviewer, not a quality assurance guy. Nothing says he has to play the game to its conclusion.

Well... except his contract, probably. But I doubt that he or the Escapist gave a shit, I mean, he's just too good.

 

[CitySquirrel]

Is there an opposite of a fanboy? Someone who is convinced all games are now crap (except a few that he /she loves) and that if you like them you are one of the hypnotized masses that have been brainwashed into loving mediocrity? Cuz I know a guy like this.

 

[GoodApprentice]

F.Y.I.

It's irony at use here, not sarcasm.

 

[Saltyk]

So, how to avoid the wrath of fanboys: don't post an opinion. Got it. I kinda knew that already though, but you get loads of points for the awesome way you said it.

You also forgot the "can't judge a game until you've played through until the end even if the first part is atrociously bad." (see the FF13 comments under Yahtzee's review)

Invalidated by the fact that he straight up told you at the start that he only played five hours. It's not like he was trying to fool anyone into thinking he played the entire thing and wanted them to think it was a shit festival from start to finish.

And also, he's right. Something bad getting better later doesn't excuse the bad part. For the 20 hours I'd have to waste to get to the "good" part of FF13, I could just play another game that's good from start to finish. And I will choose the other game every time, because I'm in this to have fun, not to be bored and annoyed.

I'm not saying he's wrong. He's a gamer reviewer, not a quality assurance guy. Nothing says he has to play the game to its conclusion.

The thing is. I don't think of Yahtzee as a game reviewer per se. I see him more as a game satire writer. He rarely has anything good to say about even the best games. And that's what I love about his reviews! Yahtzee will remind you that your favorite game is far from perfect. It may only be a little less crap than a few other games truth be told.

For the record, I personally liked FFXIII. Once you got into Chap 3, the story became much better. Eventually, I even stopped hating a few particular characters (cough Vanille, Hope cough).

 

[mexicola]

I think we all learned a few things today. I'm going to print out these rules and keep them next to my monitor just so I don't forget. No longer shall ignorant haters walk around freely without being corrected about how wrong they are, you changed my life, Shamus.