Are you single or not ?

[Anja Bech]

I?m surprised at how many sees a significant other (or more) as a time/money drain that only brings problems and restrictions. Like, "Sure, I'm single, but look at all this money I got!" How do you have more money when you're single? My finances were so much better when I lived with my previous partner because we were a two income couple instead of two one income people with separate bills. Is it the American dating culture that apparently demands you throw money at people you want to be with? I'm not sure I understand it.

 

[BathorysGraveland2]

Yeah, I'm single, but not looking. Though I've yet to have a girlfriend, I'm not at all regretful. I understand I'm not really material for a committed relationship. At least not until I'm in my 30's/40's and willing to settle down. At the moment (and feel free to call me an immature **** for this) I want to experience the stupid party life of the 20's. I want to be silly for awhile, have fun, maybe get involved in some one night stands, some drunk sex. All that kind of shit for awhile before I get into a relationship and settle down with a woman I love.

I'm not sure what that makes me, in terms of being a good person or not, but I like to feel it's the responsible decision. If I got into a relationship before I was ready, I'd fuck it up. Either I wouldn't treat my partner right, or I'd have sex with someone else during it or whatever.

So yeah, single and not ready to mingle for a long fucking while.

 

[DRTJR]

In a relationship for a year and a half. woot woot.

 

[Soxafloppin]

Single.

I've had three girlfriends, and even though I liked them all at the time, and still consider myself friends with two of them, I've came to the conclusion that I don't like being in a relationship.

I'm selfish with my time to a very large degree, I also work a lot at short notice which can get in the way of things, I'm not a good boyfriend. Right now I have a casual thing going on with two girls and I see them from time to time which is fine.

I just think we have it drilled into our heads from a young age that people in relationships are objectively happier than single people which is simply untrue.

 

[Anja Bech]

I'm finding that strange too. I'm guessing that either people who see it that way still live at home with their parents and so don't have bills that need to be shared, or maybe there's an assumption that one partner won't have employment in the relationship so it's a one-income, two-person household. I can understand the latter to a degree, because it would drive me batshit if my wife didn't work (we don't have children or any responsibilities beyond ourselves) and I had to pay for everything. In fact, I'd quit my job too, just to spite her.

As well you should! Or maybe just get a new credit card so she can't spend your money? "You'll starve or you'll work" seems fair in this situation. If I could afford to be the sole provider though, I would love having my partner be a stay-at-home person, (not necessarily parent, 'cos I'm still not sure I want those icky things. No offense to anyone who actually love their spawn.) if they did most of the boring house-stuff, cooking and doing dishes in particular.

Captcha: thank you. uhm.. you're welcome?.. <.<..

 

[Anja Bech]

I work at home; that is the last place I would want her to be if she was not working. I'd be doing all my work stuff, thinking really hard about words and such, and all I'd hear would be Minecraft's Du!Du!Du!Du!Du!Du!Du!Du! interspersed with frantic mouse clicks.

Also, we have a dishwasher.

I'm going to preempt her. Handing my notice in this afternoon.

Oh yeah, I can imagine how that can be quite the distraction. And go you, show her what's what! You don't need money, you've got convictions.

 

[Equiliari]

Currently in a 7 year old relationship. We have been living together for 2 years.

 

[seris]

no relationship here, havent dated anyone and im happy being alone enjoying my free time. i dont have the time or energy to spend on someone else constantly demanding attention from me, when i just want to be left alone. Maybe this will change in the future but right now im not looking for anyone

 

[Hugga_Bear]

Single...kinda. I don't want to be in a relationship right now because frankly I don't trust myself in one, the last one blew up because I was being an idiot and pushed her away so until I'm content that I can work a legitimate full blown relationship I'll stick to enjoying my current status as single but on and off with a couple of people who are both aware of the situation and content to continue.

 

[Aesir23]

Single with only one relationship in my 25 year history. I certainly wouldn't complain if I ever found someone I enjoyed being with but I seem to be a severe introvert so seeing people more than twice a week makes me feel a bit tired and very irritated.

As a result I seem to be happier when I'm single but considering my inexperience with relationships I don't want to say that for certain.

EDIT:

I really want to agree with Piscian in that relationships are not all they're cracked up to be. At least, not to the point where people should obsess about it like many people my age.

A lot of people around my age act as if the world is over or they're a failure for not being in a relationship or if they've never had a relationship and that's really not the case. I was like that too when I was 21 and all it did was cause me to rush into a relationship with a person who wasn't right for me. In the end it just ended up being a bad experience for both of us. For me it was because I wasn't sure how to approach any issues that cropped up in our relationship since I'm a very private person so I tend to internalize a lot of things. Because of the frustration as well as how I dealt with it I was a complete ***** to him close to the end of our relationship and it's something I've regretted ever since.

So to sum it all up, right now I'm more focused on relaxing and attempting to enjoy life as much as an unemployed person can.

 

[Pheo1386]

Taken

It's a great film.

 

[Ieyke]

I'm 27(nearly 28) and technically have always been single.
Or maybe not.
There were 2-3 years there where I was in a relationship.
I guess?
She refers to it as if we were, and that's fine with me.
....except...she was in a relationship with another guy who just wasn't around...and she and I are best friends who are unstoppably attracted to each other, except that she refused to ever cross the line beyond "just friends" because she was in a relationship....But we lived all over that line for 2-3 years, we were like...as together as it's possible for 2 humans to be while still claiming "just friends" and "not cheating".
Fucking complicated as hell.

And aside from her, there's the first girl I ever loved, who turned me down....but I'm still in love with 10 years later.
And the first girl I ever liked, who also tuned me down (probably for the best).
Both of them are 2 more of my best friends.

^Thus far, those 3 represent the sum total of women who I've met who I like enough to ask out. Ever. My standards are....really high.

And now I'm investigating the possibilities of the ".5x+7" rule....
There's a girl I go to school with who's apparently AWESOME. I've known her for 3 class days (like 12 hours), she's on a very similar wavelength to me, she's a Game Design major like I am, sweet, funny, and goddamn gorgeous......but she's 20 - about to turn 21.
.5x+7 x=27 =20.5
.5x+7 x=28 =21

That puts me in the clear, right?
I'm hesitant...
Not sure why.

 

[holy_secret]

I'm in a relationship for almost a year now. Happy and all of that.

 

[Weaver]

I'm currently single.
If anyone in Southern Ontario wants to go on a date let me know

 

[Techno Squidgy]

20, currently single, currently hurting over unrequited love, but trying to move on. It'd be nice if she stopped telling me she loved me. I know she means platonic love, not romantic, but it doesn't make it hurt any less. It's all so horribly, horribly fucked. She's my best friend's ex, currently with one of my other friends, and my other best friend is also crazy about her. It's a no-win scenario for all of us. Except her apparently, everything seems to be working out just fine for her no matter how many of us get hurt. I don't know if she even realises the damage she's causing.

I'm just hoping to meet someone new that'll blast her out of my mind. It's probably going to take someone really special to do that though.

 

[SinisterDeath]

I?m surprised at how many sees a significant other (or more) as a time/money drain that only brings problems and restrictions. Like, "Sure, I'm single, but look at all this money I got!" How do you have more money when you're single? My finances were so much better when I lived with my previous partner because we were a two income couple instead of two one income people with separate bills. Is it the American dating culture that apparently demands you throw money at people you want to be with? I'm not sure I understand it.

It's less of an American thing and more self-delusion really...

The kind of relationships they are mostly talking about is less a committed, living together kind of situation, but more the dating-game situation before the fun of living together comes into play... (Though, that isn't to say the dating game doesn't extend into a committed relationship. And depending on the people involved, sometimes it would be cheaper living on there own.)

I've heard about/seen people in relationships, that seems to be all to common (and it crosses genders) where one person in the relationship would be burdened with all the bills; While the other is spending everything on themselves selfishly. (It happens. And again, applies to both genders!)