Best insult without swearing?

[SOAL]

"Your mother should have aborted you"...personal favorite hahah

 

[Cid Silverwing]

Your existence disproves intelligent design.

Priceless!

 

[Music Mole]

Nice catch does your husband play?

 

[Nyan Cat]

I had a wet dream about you.

You got hit by a bus and I wet myself laughing.

ROFLSTOPMED!

 

[nolongerhere]

You may not be the sharpest tool in the shed, but you're certainly the biggest.

 

[Akio]

"You're under the impression that i could give a damn" add a smiley face and success everytime

 

[Music Mole]

You're a towel.
simple, elegant and extremely effective.
this, will buy you time to come up with something more thought provoking.

 

[Undead Dragon King]

You have a face only a hammer could love.

 

[SOAL]

You're a towel.
simple, elegant and extremely effective.
this, will buy you time to come up with something more thought provoking.

Ah Yes...I've done this...Works well...Only i Usually say something like..."Ok you Cardboard Box"...calling someone any completely random object seems to have a great effect.

 

[SOAL]

You're a towel.
simple, elegant and extremely effective.
this, will buy you time to come up with something more thought provoking.

Ah Yes...I've done this...Works well...Only i Usually say something like..."Ok you Cardboard Box"...calling someone any completely random object seems to have a great effect.

 

[Eskay]

Call someone an autofellating coprophage.

It just rolls off the tongue.

 

[smiddyhawk]

"If you were a dog, I'd put you down"
"Tell your mum the money's on the table after last night"
Mimic them in a retard voice

 

[impuls1ve]

Haven't they found the cure for ugliness already ?

 

[CoreofexisteNz]

uhm the always short and stout, "Dont care" or simply an amused stare when someone is emotional/mad

on the "disease" topic "get aids 'n die"

intellect "Its funny, your iq seems to be less than your shoesize"

religion "Wheres your God now?"

during an argument that just started "I just realised something... I can leave."

when a girl, that one of your mates already had a relationship with, takes a shine to you, and asks why you arent interested respond with "I dont recycle"

"Not impressed"

"That it?"

sarcasm works like a charm usually

any form of laconic wit shuts people up quickly

but nothing ends a conversation/dispute faster than "*yawn* you done?"

 

[Zombie_Fish]

You can insult someone without swearing? What the fuck?
Eh mine would be
Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries.
Then again pretty much anything Monty Python is just gold.

DAMMIT! NINJA'D!

Anyway, another one I think is "God, he's a bigger buzzkill then Buzz Killington."

Spoiler: Buzz Killington

Skip to 33 seconds and you'll know what I mean.

 

[SOAL]

You're a towel.
simple, elegant and extremely effective.
this, will buy you time to come up with something more thought provoking.

Ah Yes...I've done this...Works well...Only i Usually say something like..."Ok you Cardboard Box"...calling someone any completely random object seems to have a great effect.

 

[SecretTacoNinja]

"You myopic ignoramus"

 

[Maldaris]

Your so ugly you make my eyes close

 

[Music Mole]

You're a towel.
simple, elegant and extremely effective.
this, will buy you time to come up with something more thought provoking.

Ah Yes...I've done this...Works well...Only i Usually say something like..."Ok you Cardboard Box"...calling someone any completely random object seems to have a great effect.

It is quite the humorous yarn indeed.