Duke Nukem Forever Review

[Look-a-Hill]

Yes. Sometimes it is. However, this is not a good example. Pissing, throwing poop, slapping wall-breasts? Those sound like a good time to you?

I wasn't interesting in this game (never played DN when I was younger) until I saw you could throw poo.

It's immature as hell, yes, and isn't exactly sending out a great message at non-gamers but I'd rather play something ridiculous that makes me chuckle than a game where you play some macho wanker that can't pick up shit and throw it because he's too much of a serious bore.

DNF strikes me as a game that you play privately but when speaking to non-gamers you pretend it doesn't exist.

 

[Loonerinoes]

Duke is the bastard son of a thousand game developers - and it shows.

For some reason I can just imagine Russ Pitts as Thorne from Game of Thrones as he's taunting Snow:

"Blood will always show! Ye'll hang fer this bastard!"

 

[Olofelefant]

I think Duke should have just been left alone, as some sort of a relic from times long gone by, and as a reminder of something. Right now, this feels like the equivalent of thread necromancy, that it will get the thread some more views, but in the end everyoe will think you're a douche.

 

[mcnally86]

"Recommendation: If you are stuck on a deserted island with only this game to play, go fishing instead. Worth playing so that you may be able to say that you did, but otherwise imminently forgettable and not worth your time."

I'm not one to beef about scores too much, but what would a game have to do get a 1-star rating, I mean Jesus Christ xD

It would have to burn out the writers eyes like opening the ark of the covenant. Can we now make a kick ass and chew bubblegum "They Live" game. The movie also known as live action basis for Duke.

Edit: "They live game would need to include:

Mullets
Shooting civilians that you know are bad but no one else does
Mullets
Poor People in shanty towns
Migraines
Aliens
Economic depression (check)
Vomit inducing testicle destroying realistic street fight over sun glasses
Mullets
One liners
Mullets
Mullets
Calling old ladies ugly in a descriptive manner
Glorious golden mulleted hero

 

[orangeapples]

probably said, but often forgotten, When Duke Nukem was popular, we were 12...ish (I was 10).

This was the equivalent of meeting up with an old buddy and him wanting to do the same stupid stuff we did when we were kids. You think its still cool to steal candy from the corner liquor shop? We can just buy the candy now.

Duke back in the day was cool because he was so immature and childish because we were immature and childish, but now it just seems sad.

 

[unca_laguna]

I'm disappointed by how gaming journalism seems to have self destructed around this game.

it IS better than the last two Call of Duty games, although I'm sure reviewer's selective awareness of the stupidity of the FPS genre will turn off again by the time the next one of THOSE comes out. mustn't anger activision.

 

[RoseBridge]

Well, there's always Bulletstorm.

If you're disappointed with DNF, get it instead. Captures the 90s run and gun fun much better.

Pretty much this, so DNF isn't the game we wanted,and yeah that sucks, but bad games do exist so just carry on and wait for Serious Sam BFE.

 

[unca_laguna]

Well, there's always Bulletstorm.

If you're disappointed with DNF, get it instead. Captures the 90s run and gun fun much better.

Pretty much this, so DNF isn't the game we wanted,and yeah that sucks, but bad games do exist so just carry on and wait for Serious Sam BFE.

you have to use cover in bulletstorm. its the same CoD crap but with a shallow point system. DNF IS an old school shooter; there just aren't any nostalgia goggles to make it seem better now.

 

[smut]

What a horrible game and sick of all the fanboys trying to use every excuse in the book to justify the shitty gameplay "well it is made just for fun, WHY SO SERIOUZ!!!". What the fuck does that even mean?!? That doesn't excuse all the problems the game has and you know it. But typically people who just dropped 60+ on a game that turns out to be a turd will justify to themselves that it is a great game. They don't want to admit they bought a turd, human nature I guess.

 

[ultimateownage]

Why, in the video supplement, do you censor the word 'fuck' and then show breasts?

 

[Koios]

What a horrible game and sick of all the fanboys trying to use every excuse in the book to justify the shitty gameplay "well it is made just for fun, WHY SO SERIOUZ!!!". What the fuck does that even mean?!? That doesn't excuse all the problems the game has and you know it. But typically people who just dropped 60+ on a game that turns out to be a turd will justify to themselves that it is a great game. They don't want to admit they bought a turd, human nature I guess.

I have a friend who got it for free from someone else, played it, and had fun. He didn't drop $60, so what's his excuse?

 

[Slycne]

Why, in the video supplement, do you censor the word 'fuck' and then show breasts?

That line of VO was censored in the trailer I pulled it from.

 

[normalguycap]

Besides Yahtzee, I don't give a crap about this website. I think most of the reviews and articles are garbage. It's so painful to watch them try to be funny or witty. Extra Credits is ok.

But not doing an actual video review and rather something he felt like doing instead because he's "not 12" is contradictory. The author sacrificed his own integrity to act like a child and not like a professional reviewer who would review all games with equal attention and service. To me this was not honest.

To make everyone happy, they should have probably had two reviewers work on this game. One who was a fan of the past games and a person who has never played Duke before.

I always think it's a shame when the reviewer never completes the game. Judging from the Bottom Line, he seemed biased going into it and that's unethical in journalism.

 

[smut]

What a horrible game and sick of all the fanboys trying to use every excuse in the book to justify the shitty gameplay "well it is made just for fun, WHY SO SERIOUZ!!!". What the fuck does that even mean?!? That doesn't excuse all the problems the game has and you know it. But typically people who just dropped 60+ on a game that turns out to be a turd will justify to themselves that it is a great game. They don't want to admit they bought a turd, human nature I guess.

I have a friend who got it for free from someone else, played it, and had fun. He didn't drop $60, so what's his excuse?

I said typically, not all of the time. I know many friends who bought shitty games but just couldn't admit it to themselves because hey, who likes to admit they spent 60$ on a turd?

 

[unca_laguna]

What a horrible game and sick of all the fanboys trying to use every excuse in the book to justify the shitty gameplay "well it is made just for fun, WHY SO SERIOUZ!!!". What the fuck does that even mean?!? That doesn't excuse all the problems the game has and you know it. But typically people who just dropped 60+ on a game that turns out to be a turd will justify to themselves that it is a great game. They don't want to admit they bought a turd, human nature I guess.

except that the gameplay isn't shitty, its varied, fun, and it works. and the fact remains that this game is STILL better than the last 3 call of duty installments.

no, what people are mad about is the aesthetics. they wanted a game about a serious badass and they got a SATIRICAL game about a serious badass. you people were expecting (and god help you, WANTING) another game in the style of Michel Bay, and what you got was Rocky Horror.

 

[Mangue Surfer]

So wrong, yet, so right!

 

[Two Angels]

Still better value for money than Homefront!

I'm enjoying the game, not as great as I hoped but as a filler till Deus Ex comes out it'll do.

 

[Alex Cowan]

"Recommendation: If you are stuck on a deserted island with only this game to play, go fishing instead. Worth playing so that you may be able to say that you did, but otherwise imminently forgettable and not worth your time."

I'm not one to beef about scores too much, but what would a game have to do get a 1-star rating, I mean Jesus Christ xD

In this case, it seems like you get 2 stars just for finishing making the sodding thing*... To get a 1, the game would probably have to sell your immortal soul to Satan, but even then, Hell has some fairly impressive graphics.

*I wish all my work was marked by that logic XD

 

[ultimateownage]

Why, in the video supplement, do you censor the word 'fuck' and then show breasts?

That line of VO was censored in the trailer I pulled it from.

Ah, that makes sense then. Didn't realise they censored the swearing in the trailers.

 

[smut]

What a horrible game and sick of all the fanboys trying to use every excuse in the book to justify the shitty gameplay "well it is made just for fun, WHY SO SERIOUZ!!!". What the fuck does that even mean?!? That doesn't excuse all the problems the game has and you know it. But typically people who just dropped 60+ on a game that turns out to be a turd will justify to themselves that it is a great game. They don't want to admit they bought a turd, human nature I guess.

except that the gameplay isn't shitty, its varied, fun, and it works. and the fact remains that this game is STILL better than the last 3 call of duty installments.

no, what people are mad about is the aesthetics. they wanted a game about a serious badass and they got a SATIRICAL game about a serious badass. you people were expecting (and god help you, WANTING) another game in the style of Michel Bay, and what you got was Rocky Horror.

Yup, you figured it out. We all don't like it because of the aesthetics and we wanted a Michael Bay game. Great strawman argument. And I don't care about Call of Duty.

This review http://www.giantbomb.com/duke-nukem-forever/61-20721/reviews/ describes how I feel about the game.