Not an NPC I killed, just one I knocked out. It still made me feel like the biggest jack ass in the world though. In Deus Ex:HR there's this one mission where you have to collect money from a woman because she refuses to pay her debts. I came to collect it (because from my understanding she hadn't been paying) and she basically told me to piss off. So I decked her in the face and looted the money from her body. Immediately I felt worse about this than anything else I've ever done in a game. It didn't help that I reloaded my save and tried being nice this time, and she proceeded to tell me her heart wrenching life story. Well played Deus Ex, well played.
I have experienced nothing more horrifying then coldly telling a grieving mother the exact details of her daughters murder, before grabbing her own head and twisting it like a coke cap.
At that time I didn't even know I could kill civilians in the game, after that I played Jensen like a murderous sociopath robot.
For anyone whose played it, the dark brotherhood questline in Oblivion, I'm sure you know which one I mean...
For those who want more detail
specifically the quest where you are told to kill everyone in the sanctuary, by that point, I'd developed bonds with all the NPC's there and this strange family of outcasts, they'd given my character a home, not shunned him for his desires, even given him the gift of imortality and vampirism by choice, almost affectionatly given (platonic, friendship affection I add), not forced upon you, just waking up to the 2 marks on ones neck and knowing soon the gift will be complete, one that after everything that had happend and the affection I felt towards him, I was very willing and eager to accept.
Heck even the dick of a khajiit was warming up to me. As I said (probably helps I really get into roleplaying all my RPG characters) these people were my family... and then, I had to kill them all, I put it off for soooooo long, finaly, very begrudgingly finishing it to see where the quest went but I didn't feel good about it at all, hated myself for it! Even kept a seperate save game just before I did so I could go back and see them again if I wanted to
Oh damn....
and the regrets come flooding back...
You know, despite the immense love I have for Skyrim... Oblivion's faction quests were so much better.
while playing fallout new vegas i did this i felt like a complete ass after i did that
i was play a evil character pretending to be good and sporting the ncr. until the right time comes to betray them and massacre every one in small camps first, nuke them, etc
but that was the first truly evil thing i did in the game and it bothered me
i still go with the plan
but i know this wouldn't be the last time i do something out right agents my conscience that makes me feel like a asshole
On my first playthrough of Dark Souls, I accidentally attacked the man who later on sells you miracles, and when he started to fight back I thought my only option was to kill him. I was upset to learn later that this meant no miracles for me, but what was actually awful about it all was that his friends decided to attack me later in the game.
After I killed both of the princess's guard, she was left alone and would chase me down and punch me whenever I returned to firelink shrine. This eventually became so annoying that I decided to put her out of her misery. But she died so easily and so miserably that I immediately regretted it.
I regretted killing the servile leader of the Obeyers in Geneforge so much that I had to stop playing that playthrough.
Protip: If you've just killed someone, don't read through their diary.
I killed some NPC kids parents in skyrim, and immediatley felt bad about it.
Then I played hide and seek with her, and she forgave me.
SKYRIM!
IS!
WEEEEEEEEEEEEIRD!
While I didn't kill her directly, my actions were responsible for the death of Kelly Chambers. Which hit really close to home for me, because I had actually romanced her and I genuinely enjoyed talking to her. But I made a critical judgement that I needed Legion's loyalty, not knowing the consequence of that. Watching her getting liquefied right in front of me haunts both Shepard and myself to this day. Big damn heroes, indeed.
Knights of the Old Republic 1 when I didn't quite do things right and I was forced to kill
Bastila
who turned to the dark side.
Also Old Republic when
There was a Jawa that could use the force, and I was forced to kill it because I wanted full dark side. Made me feel sick.
Damn you Bioware and your good character development!
There are other cases in other games, but I was going evil so I didn't do it. Doing anything destructive in Oasis in Fallout 3 would make me sick. Its so pretty there.
While I didn't kill her directly, my actions were responsible for the death of Kelly Chambers. Which hit really close to home for me, because I had actually romanced her and I genuinely enjoyed talking to her. But I made a critical judgement that I needed Legion's loyalty, not knowing the consequence of that. Watching her getting liquefied right in front of me haunts both Shepard and myself to this day. Big damn heroes, indeed.
yeah that game did not work at all for me because you can actually touch other dots and they vanish, but some vanish on their own. made me completely not care. and when you make a game and call it a "notgame" the amount of pretentious bullshit makes me wanna choke.
and of course Korean children are miserable, half of them are starving to death while their fat baby-faced leader opens an amusement park.
OT: not really, when i go on killing sprees i don't mind and other than that i prefer to avoid killing as much as possible.
oh the boss. i hated killing the boss
The other squares only disappear if you get close enough, you don't need to be touching them. The only thing that makes them vanish is your proximity. You need to pay closer attention.
And I think it's not pretentious at all. There's no pretense, you just play the game. And notgame, so far as I can tell, means that's it not designed to be "fun" in the way most games are. How is it pretentious?
Also, you should learn your geopolitics. Americans aren't allowed in North Korea, which is the only Korea with a large starving population. The guy that made this game worked in South Korea, which is a very typical Asian developed country. And they have a nearly inexplicable problem with suicide that, honestly, you marginalized startling ignorance.
you can't make a not-game. just because something is a "game" does not mean it's supposed to be fun, it just means it's supposed to be played. a not-game would be something that does not allow you to interact with it, and even that could be considered a statement about how games limit our imagination or something, ask Jonathan Blow about that, he seems to know everything best.
and how was i supposed to know that people from Brazil (since Americans means people from America, right?) are not allowed in North Korea? i just assumed that, since he just said "korea" he visited both countries called Korea.
and yeah i marginalize the suffering of others, i also thought "after the trailers you have my permission to die" was funny on july 20th and don't give a rats ass under what condition my phone is made as long as it works and i can afford to pay for it. i am just a terrible person
i have admit, i did not notice the dots only disappear when i get close to them because i walked up to every group and just assumed some were set to disappear and some were not.
however this makes me more uneasy, since i am pretty sure i just reenacted a crazed gunman running through a mall.
For anyone whose played it, the dark brotherhood questline in Oblivion, I'm sure you know which one I mean...
For those who want more detail
specifically the quest where you are told to kill everyone in the sanctuary, by that point, I'd developed bonds with all the NPC's there and this strange family of outcasts, they'd given my character a home, not shunned him for his desires, even given him the gift of imortality and vampirism by choice, almost affectionatly given (platonic, friendship affection I add), not forced upon you, just waking up to the 2 marks on ones neck and knowing soon the gift will be complete, one that after everything that had happend and the affection I felt towards him, I was very willing and eager to accept.
Heck even the dick of a khajiit was warming up to me. As I said (probably helps I really get into roleplaying all my RPG characters) these people were my family... and then, I had to kill them all, I put it off for soooooo long, finaly, very begrudgingly finishing it to see where the quest went but I didn't feel good about it at all, hated myself for it! Even kept a seperate save game just before I did so I could go back and see them again if I wanted to
The first time I played through the game, I didn't hesitate a moment to purge the sanctuary. I felt all the same things you did, a true family bond with my dark brothers and sisters as they welcome you in and show you more caring than any of the other guilds...and we're talking about a bunch of murderers here!
But if those in the sanctuary were my brothers ans sisters, Lucien was my father. It was to him that I was most loyal, for it was he who showed me the ligh--errr...darkness of the void. :3
As such, when he called upon me as his personal Silencer to carry out one of the darkest rites of the Brotherhood, I felt nothing but honor...even though I had a VERY strong feeling that the traitor wasn't anyone in the sanctuary. Lucien's got himself 10 juicy poison appeals in his personal lair, and so that was my weapon of choice. Slipping the tainted fruits into the pouches of my brother's and sisters, I would sit across the table from them smiling pleasantly as they munched away one-by-one......and then they munched no more. >
While I didn't kill her directly, my actions were responsible for the death of Kelly Chambers. Which hit really close to home for me, because I had actually romanced her and I genuinely enjoyed talking to her. But I made a critical judgement that I needed Legion's loyalty, not knowing the consequence of that. Watching her getting liquefied right in front of me haunts both Shepard and myself to this day. Big damn heroes, indeed.
That scene in ME3. The one where you shoot Mordin.
Apart from that the rate at which I feel bad is very strange. I've been more attached to standard enemies talking about something or another then a main character.
Edit: I almost forgot Planescape Torment. You can be an extraordinarily vicious person in that game.
While I didn't kill her directly, my actions were responsible for the death of Kelly Chambers. Which hit really close to home for me, because I had actually romanced her and I genuinely enjoyed talking to her. But I made a critical judgement that I needed Legion's loyalty, not knowing the consequence of that. Watching her getting liquefied right in front of me haunts both Shepard and myself to this day. Big damn heroes, indeed.
While I didn't kill her directly, my actions were responsible for the death of Kelly Chambers. Which hit really close to home for me, because I had actually romanced her and I genuinely enjoyed talking to her. But I made a critical judgement that I needed Legion's loyalty, not knowing the consequence of that. Watching her getting liquefied right in front of me haunts both Shepard and myself to this day. Big damn heroes, indeed.
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