How to fight.

[Dangerious P. Cats]

Am I the only person here disconcerted that people are advicing someone entering into what sounds like a schoolyard fight to get all fairbairn and potentially kill the other kid?

On another note I really hope that Jack Thompson or Tipper Gore don't ever find this thread, nothing says video games encourage violence like a group of gamers in a forum on a gaming website telling another gamer how to maim or possibly kill someone because another gamer ask how to win a fight they were preparing to have.

 

[ComicsAreWeird]

Avoid fighting if possible.

If it comes to it...headbut his nose: It´ll hurt a lot and it bleeds easily. Blood demotivates anyone of his friends to join the battle. Also, kick in the nuts is ususally effective.

But do this as a last resort. I repeat:avoid fighting. It is pointless.

 

[RatRace123]

Grapple, throw a few blows and to mix up your tactics and surprise your opponent, if you suddenly grab his arms and deliver a kick you can get a few strikes in.

Of course, if you can avoid fights and talk it out, that's the better way to solve problems.
These tips should only be used for defense.

 

[Denamic]

Be cheap.
Go for the jaw, groin or ribs.
Also, if you get a chance, hit him in the biceps.
Believe me, it hurts like a *****, and it can even make him unable to use the arm for a while.

 

[TheYellowCellPhone]

Use the base of your hand, the meaty part, not the knuckles.

Unless you want a few broken bones, y'know.

Oh yes, and aim for the jaw.

 

[MGlBlaze]

with any luck, i am going to get into a fight tomorrow at school. This guy is the biggest douche ever and keeps walking all over me and i about to do something if he doesn't stop screwing with me. Any tips on how to win a fight? i am pretty confident i can win but some tips couldn't hurt.

I'd say you shouldn't be looking for a fight. An intellectual battle of wills sure, but when things get physical, all reason generally has already gone out the window.

Also, have you tried contacting any staff at the school you go to? Dealing with it that way would be a far better way of going about things, and would probably give better results in the long run. This is just school; stupid crap won't matter much, but if you beat the kid into a pulp and ger arrested for assault, that will stay with you forever.

I emplore you to find another solution besides fighting.

If you REALLY have to fight... (I recommend such action only in self defence; I.E. he tries to throw the first punch and you were not trying to provoke him)

Spoiler

No, I'm seriousely not going to tell you how. Everyone else has already done it anyway... but for fuck's sake, don't aim for the throat, temples or a rising strike on the nose. They could seriousely kill someone and you will have no sympathy from me if you get arrested for murder in the process.

 

[The_Healer]

eat a bannana

Surprisingly, being constipated makes you more violent.

...How and why do you know this?

OT: Punch him in the stomach and then knee the shit out of his face when he bends over.

 

[ahrnygoose]

Remember, step 2 is very important.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2REG3-Wb5gM

*ahrnygoose does not condone any or all violence where ahrnygoose could be subject to liability.*

 

[Ham_authority95]

eat a bannana

Surprisingly, being constipated makes you more violent.

...How and why do you know this?

Oh, I was just joking around. Sarcasm is hard to convey through cold text.

I'm probably right about it, though. Would you be in a peaceful mood if you where constipated?

 

[Phlakes]

If he throws the first punch, grab his arm and get him off balance FAST. Then hit him in a weak spot for massive damage.

 

[natster43]

Try to kick out the side or back of his Knee. That should cause him to fall.

 

[General_Potatoes]

Lol nutshot FTW. and friends. if they know how to fight

 

[havass]

Go for both ears, to disorient. Then punch the liver, kidney, knees, and groin. In no particular order. Maybe a few shots to the chest to wind him inbetween punches. If you manage to hit all of them, he'll be cursing you for weeks to come. And urinating blood, but that's a different matter altogether.

 

[havass]

eat a bannana

Surprisingly, being constipated makes you more violent.

...How and why do you know this?

Oh, I was just joking around. Sarcasm is hard to convey through cold text.

I'm probably right about it, though. Would you be in a peaceful mood if you where constipated?

No..but you'd probably shit your pants when he punches your stomach...literally.

 

[Sud0_x]

with any luck, i am going to get into a fight tomorrow at school. This guy is the biggest douche ever and keeps walking all over me and i about to do something if he doesn't stop screwing with me. Any tips on how to win a fight? i am pretty confident i can win but some tips couldn't hurt.

You're grounded.
No seriously, you want to get into a fight with a guy because you think he's a bit of a dick?
Call it hypocrisy, call it irony. Grow the fuck up, all of you. Shouldn't even be joking about a kid taking knives to school people.
OP you'll learn life's lessons the fucking hard way.

 

[Requx]

Fight-hyperbeam-Critical hit-It's super effective.
That's how you win fights.
Fighting though if not trained comes through instinct. Don't forget to use your surroundings to your advantage. Also good job on eliminating douchebags...I think?

 

[Thebiggestpanda]

with any luck, i am going to get into a fight tomorrow at school. This guy is the biggest douche ever and keeps walking all over me and i about to do something if he doesn't stop screwing with me. Any tips on how to win a fight? i am pretty confident i can win but some tips couldn't hurt.

A real man knows to avoid a fight when he can. Truly fighting someone is a fast and brutal thing that you can only get better at with experience. Anybody can research the weakpoints of the human body or read a CQC manual but the truth is, if you've never been in a real fight before, you most likely aren't gonna be an ass kicking machine.

Also, all these people telling you to hit the throat and other such things, don't listen to them. A hit like that can and will kill someone with enough power behind it. I can tell you right now that you aren't prepared for the consequences of potentially killing someone.

Again it's one thing to read about it. It's also another thing to imagine it. But actually experiencing it is an entirely different beast.

 

[Thedayrecker]

I prefer to attack my opponents on a mental level.

and this:

Or pull a Tyler Durden and scream/laugh like you're having the best time of your life

 

[Littlee300]

Be as calm as possible and polite, with kicking his ass in mind always for 'the day'. When you are being polite and he is being asshole you will look like a bad ass taking him down and look like a good kid when caught.
Train like Rocky, he will be eating twinkies and playing black ops most likely when you are training, let this inspire you and be the reason you are the better man. post pone the fight a couple of days for training, practice your punching speed!

 

[basic.acid]

please please please do NOT punch him in the throat... you can crush his wind pipe and kill him really easy that way and you will not be able to call it self defense.

Don't do anything that will cause permanent damage unless your life is actually in danger.

protect your head and pick a spot that doesn't have any crap to land on cause if you get taken down u don't want to land on glass.

lastly make sure he throws the first punch so you can claim that he started it and it was self defense. I've been expelled for fighting and i wouldn't recommend it.