He didn't do any such thing. He attempted to clarify (which shouldn't really have been necessary, but given how much abuse he's taken in the thread apparently was) what he was driving at, and yet here you are, still attacking him for something he never said.A Smooth Criminal said:I edited it out because I realized that by calling you an asshole I'm going a bit too far.
And there're no assumptions regarding your attitude when you WRITE IT DOWN. You pretty much said what your thoughts were, had your opinions be called stupid and then said "you're making assumptions. I never said any of that. I only explained why I think virgin males are shamed".
You may as well be writing "I'm not an asshole, but..."
Also, I can guarantee that no one here is feigning incomprehension in order to seek reassurance. People don't comprehend your opinion because it's both absurd, too widely accepted as a valid opinion and it shouldn't be as big of a deal as it is.
What YOU'RE doing is essentially calling people failures and losers over something as meaningless as being a virgin.
Oh transgenders seem to tend to be rather righteous, I'm guilty of that aswell. The only advantage i see here is maybe that TGs arent as screwed up by how they have to be? Or some atleast...Playful Pony said:Haha, I know. Transgender here *puts hand up*, but I've never met one that wasn't a really open, friendly and pleasant kind of person. I guess I've been as lucky with transgenders as I've been unlucky with boyfriends X3.Zachary Amaranth said:As a M2F transgender, I can safely say we're not all nice. I know a lot of crazy ones.Playful Pony said:I want an M2F Transgender girlfriend... They are always so nice, but always so taken X3.
I also kind of find it disconcerting that now we're being held up as sort of a holy grail. Especially when you consider "transgender" is something nobody really wants to be.
As an Asexual as well this is why I avoid relationships like they're rapist plague rats with super aids. The idea of sex for me is beyond uncomfortable, it's skin crawling, and makes my stomach churn (if you like it that's fine knock yourself out, but for me no, no, no, and fuck no. If you're straight imagine someone of the same sex trying to jump your bones and you might get the level of uncomfortable I have with anybody).SinisterGehe said:Tho I am very sad of the fact that many of my relationships have hit an iceberg and sunk when my partner learned that I don't care of sex. The first few months of social relationships were great but when they wanted to take next step and "go for it" they were dispointed and decided to end it. - Unfair in my opinion.
This made me curious, care to elaborate?Zack Alklazaris said:Anyway seriously good things do happen to those who wait.
I don't know if what you're describing there qualifies as clinical asexuality. I may be incorrect on this, but my understanding of asexuality is just a total lack of interest/arousal when it comes to sex, not an active disgust/aversion. That sounds more like a PTSD reaction than a lack of arousal.chiggerwood said:As an Asexual as well this is why I avoid relationships like they're rapist plague rats with super aids. The idea of sex for me is beyond uncomfortable, it's skin crawling, and makes my stomach churn (if you like it that's fine knock yourself out, but for me no, no, no, and fuck no. If you're straight imagine someone of the same sex trying to jump your bones and you might get the level of uncomfortable I have with anybody).
You're ignoring basic social/biological triggers in your haste to blast virgin shamers as the assholes you want them to be. The world is full of people who both consciously and inadvertently find themselves reinforcing the concept of static gender roles. We even have you, here, talking about "what it means to be a man", as if there could possibly be a textbook somewhere we could reference on the subject. You can demonize those people if it makes you feel comfortable, but you are just projecting your insecurities on to them as much as you believe they are projecting theirs on to you.chiggerwood said:As for the virgin shaming that's actually pretty easy, but comes with multiple options
There are women out there whose ultra fantasy is taking an innocent sex ignorant guy and watching his eyes explode in surprise when he has sex for the first time and the fact that they caused that. That the guy is all theirs, untouched and clean.fenrizz said:Well.. To be blunt..
It implies that you cannot get laid, and thus is lacking the necessary social skills.
Right or wrong, that is how it is.
This made me curious, care to elaborate?Zack Alklazaris said:Anyway seriously good things do happen to those who wait.
It was only a matter of time until somebody did it, I was just first away off the grid ;-)Phasmal said:Ew, did you have to Captain Keydick the thread? =P
It was done with my tongue lodged firmly in my cheek.Vault101 said:no! no! NOOO!!! NOT THE KEYDICK METAPHOR!!! DAMMIT! ugggh I hate the fucking thing so much
I do. I truly do. And here's a bit of irony for you; after the relationship I referenced in my original post came to an end some years later, I turned into a bit of a man-whore. Seriously, I would sleep with literally any woman who was up for it. Truth be told I had a hell of a fun few years in between "serious" girlfriends.Vault101 said:Your analogy is bad and you should feel bad.
Holy fuck 25? With the multiplier (average person has 3 partners) thats 25^3 that means your "sex social network" is around 15,625 people.srm79 said:It was only a matter of time until somebody did it, I was just first away off the grid ;-)Phasmal said:Ew, did you have to Captain Keydick the thread? =P
It was done with my tongue lodged firmly in my cheek.Vault101 said:no! no! NOOO!!! NOT THE KEYDICK METAPHOR!!! DAMMIT! ugggh I hate the fucking thing so much
I do. I truly do. And here's a bit of irony for you; after the relationship I referenced in my original post came to an end some years later, I turned into a bit of a man-whore. Seriously, I would sleep with literally any woman who was up for it. Truth be told I had a hell of a fun few years in between "serious" girlfriends.Vault101 said:Your analogy is bad and you should feel bad.
But here's the kicker: I've recently met someone who has literally blown my mind. I've had a couple of serious girlfriends since that very first one (and in between the hedonistic man-whoring), but never anyone who I've connected with like this. And you know what? I am fucking dreading being asked about my sexual history, because I know now that the idea that a man is "supposed" to be promiscuous is bullshit. I've already had one close escape with that conversation, but not before finding out she has had one sexual partner. One!!! (She married at 18, got divorced last year and hasn't been with another man, for anyone that's wondering). And I have to choose between either outright lying (ain't gonna happen), or finding a way to make having had 25+ sexual partners sound less terrible.
Be careful what you wish for, and all that...
Eh, 25+ is nothing. It's not like you're Wilt Chamberlain. That's still within a perfectly 'normal' range. I dated a girl who had slept with 90+ before. Her prolific sexual history didn't make her any less awesome as a person (mind you, she was a wee bit jaded sexually). Short of very practical concerns that can be remedied with an STD test, there's no reason the number of prior sexual partners should impact a relationship if neither person wants it to.srm79 said:And I have to choose between either outright lying (ain't gonna happen), or finding a way to make having had 25+ sexual partners sound less terrible.
Only the opposite way round!TopazFusion said:Apparently if you're a female virgin, you're some sort of holy grail.
Whereas if you're a male virgin, you must be some basement-dwelling, neck-bearded, social outcast.
It's one of the best examples of modern-day sexism.
You kind of did. Just because a person is looking for sex does not make them sexist, its a normal biological function. He said he didn't like it when people took advantage of this function, you called him sexist and accused him of treating women as machines who are meant to dish out sex after you put enough money in.manic_depressive13 said:I don't think I put words in your mouth. I merely responded to what you typed. If what you said wasn't what you meant then you may want to consider the implications of what you are writing in future.Zeke_warhammer said:Gonna stop trying to make this a pissing contest any time soon? What I'm getting at is that I do not like manipulative women, just like women don't like manipulative men. You sir, are now putting words in my mouth and I would appreciate it if you would kindly stop
Welcome to the Escapist.
This bit actually made me laugh out loud. "Multiplier" makes it sound like some sort of game. Conquest, anyone...?Zack Alklazaris said:Holy fuck 25? With the multiplier[snip]
Not really an option, in as much as I'm a terrible and obvious liar for one thing, and for another I hold trust as the single most important thing in a relationship. If I lie at the start, I'm betraying one of my most dearly held principles. Can't do it.Zack Alklazaris said:Maybe you can pull the girl card I've heard about where you divide your number of partners by half?
Read the last sentence of my post - I never stopped to think at the time that were come a day where I actually regretted most of it.Zack Alklazaris said:in some ways I'm jealous.
It's never too late. There's someone out there for everybody.Zack Alklazaris said:I hold sex so sacred that I physically am in capable of performing such an act. I sometimes wonder what I missed out on.
True, and I'm probably making a bigger deal of it in my head than it actually is. Guess I'll know soon enough, I can only dodge bullets for so long!BloatedGuppy said:Eh, 25+ is nothing. It's not like you're Wilt Chamberlain. That's still within a perfectly 'normal' range. I dated a girl who had slept with 90+ before. Her prolific sexual history didn't make her any less awesome as a person (mind you, she was a wee bit jaded sexually). Short of very practical concerns that can be remedied with an STD test, there's no reason the number of prior sexual partners should impact a relationship if neither person wants it to.
i think people are having strong reactions to your posts simply because you call them "failures". you could have easily made your point stating that you believe that male virgins are people who havent found someone without lack of trying and dont understand why. you simply come off as abrasive or patronizing to male virgins.Zhukov said:You seem to have edited out that one part where you called me an asshole.A Smooth Criminal said:Except it isn't. And you're exactly the kind of person the OP is talking about.Zhukov said:Oh, come on.
It's not that bloody complicated.
The vast majority of male virgins are virgins because for one reason or another they have failed to attract a mate. (They will of course deny this with the ferocity of a thousand blazing supernovas, but they're not fooling anyone.) So they are made fun of for their failure in the same way others are fun of for theirs.
Then they get together in the sadder corners of the internet and claim not to understand what anyone's talking about and reassure each other that, no really, they're just not focussed on relationships right now and society just doesn't understand.
...
It's obviously not a nice thing to do to people, but that's why it happens.
I get along great with girls, however if any of my female friends were to ask me out, I'd say 'no'. If it were a drunken one night stand then my judgement might change, however I really can't stand people who feel the need to insult and mock others simply because they want to feel good about themselves.
EDIT: the reason I'd say no isn't because I claim to be asexual or any of that nonsense. It's simply because I can't stand to be around judgemental dipshits 24/7 when I have much more important things to attend to. You know, like trying to get by?
Throw around your "you're just kidding yourself" and "you're just trying to reassure yourself that you're not a loser" comments all you want. If you're that stupid as to think so little of every virgin then you're obviously even less of a person than them.
Anyway, you're making a great deal of assumptions regarding my attitude. Heh, it's actually kind of funny, considering.
I don't despise male virgins and I don't approve of mocking people for their failures. It's needless and cruel.
However, I will mercilessly point out when people are feigning incomprehension in order to seek reassurance. We all know perfectly well why male virgins receive ridicule. We don't have to approve of the situation, but we all understand it just fine.
YES! Somebody else! I'm actually going to show this to a 'mate' of mine who's been trying to get me laid for like, 2 years now. Maybe then he'll believe I'm not a total nut job for not wanting to fuck.Bat Vader said:I am 25 years old and I am still a virgin. Personally, I don't care if people make fun of me for being a virgin. Their immaturity will just end up hurting them later in life. I plan on staying a virgin too. I will never trust anyone enough to get that close to someone. Plus, I don't want kids and remaining a virgin makes that goal 100% achievable.