Make a Great Game Sound Boring

Custard_Angel

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Aug 6, 2009
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No iron sights.

No cover mechanics.

No rifle scopes.

No stealth mechanics.

No puzzles.

No realistic graphics.

No realistic enemies.

Painkiller.
 

ABLb0y

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Aug 27, 2010
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Mass Effect 2: ten hours with unlikable dickweeds
Arkham City: A big burly man in little pants runs around punching the same gang member over and over.
Wolfenstien: Run around brown streets shooting nazis.
 

caselj01

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Jun 8, 2010
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Hit blocks to collect them, then place those blocks somewhere else, doesnt matter where. Use special blocks to upgrade your tools so that you can gather blocks at a faster rate! OMG!
 

Pearwood

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Mar 24, 2010
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Minecraft - No story, not even any real arc, just a huge world with no structure and anything you accomplish will be immediately destroyed by exploding green penis monsters.

Morrowind - Walk around a bland eternally brown swamp the size of a city being harassed by flying bastards who are a pain to hit until you contract a disease and find some gloves that let you kill god.

Trauma Centre - Cut people open with the help of magic wonder gel and try to remove either beetles, triangles, centipedes or a spider from various internal organs despite them having obviously fatal wounds.

Etrian Odyssey - A cartography simulator.
 

doomspore98

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May 24, 2011
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shadow of the colossus

Run around the open world doing nothing until you climb on a dude stab his week spot and kill him. Repeat around 16 times
 

blueb0g

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Oct 9, 2010
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Shadowstar38 said:
So in Bioshock 2 your like, a scubba diver. And you do drugs that make that make people light up. And there is these little girls you grab. And thats about it.
He said great game
 

LordSchucker

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Aug 16, 2011
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Skyrim: you talk to a dragon who speaks english(or whatever language you have it in) then in dragon.
 

Tamrin

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Nov 12, 2011
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angry_flashlight said:
Deus Ex: Human Revolution: Throw boxes and eat candy bars.
He didn't ask for skittles.

I'll try a hat trick, three at once.

Gears of War 1,2 & 3:
You play an exterminator who moves from one chest high wall to another chest high wall while occasionally hiding behind a chest high wall in a world of black, brown, and gray. Every now and again you shoot at stuff that gets between you and your love of chest high walls.

During the cut scenes you push your eyebrows together more forcefully than the last while grunting at the people around you who are more or less the same cardboard cut out that you are. Did I mention most of humanity is dead so these people are pretty much it? Yeah. Some of them eventually die, but at least you still have your chest high walls. That's all that really matters.
 

bauke67

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Apr 8, 2011
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So, yeah, basically all you is run around shooting things, or granading them. So you press 3 buttons for aa couple of hours. That's about it.
(any shooter)
 

Sixcess

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Feb 27, 2010
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Doom: It's an FPS where you can't jump or crouch or aim up or down. No sniper rifles, no grenades. No story development, characters or voice acting.
 

Virmire

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Sep 25, 2011
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Metal Gear Solid 4: You play the role on an elderly, chainsmoking man with back problems on his quest to take down an old delusional rival. Sneak, shoot, and complain your way through this cinematic philisophical epic!
 

woodaba

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May 31, 2011
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Planescape Torment: Run around, read some stuff. Click on a bad guy when they pop up.
 

Scarim Coral

Jumped the ship
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Any Legend of Zelda games-
You on some quest to save the princess or something. However before you can save her, you have to go through several dungeons and picking up some gadgets to use or something like that. Ther are alot of side quest which involve collecting a butch of stuff.

Xenoblade Chronicles-
You do ALOT of exploring by walking or running but it will take hours to do so. Sure the combat isn't turn based but you still got to choose your attack and position your character correctly to utalise the attacks. Oh there a bunch of fetch quests, have fun with that.
 

retyopy

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Minecraft: You walk around and build stuff. Then you go and mine things, before falling in lava and dying.
 

Double A

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Dwarf Fortress: You watch a bunch of ASCII characters move around the screen and react to different ASCII characters. Sometimes the screen gets very red.
 

Muspelheim

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ArmA 2: You attempt to pick off tiny, tiny specks at the horizon through your ironsight. Then, you are shot by a sniper. Or shoot a civilian tiny speck standing nearby and get your arse court-martial'd before the gunbarrel has cooled.


Dwarf Fortress: You manage a group of small, bearded alcoholics prone to depression and attempt to keep them alive through the winter. They will, sooner or later, snap and go on a killing spree. You have already failed.


Eve Online: You fly around in space, not discovering very much but rocks. If you try to roleplay, everyone have carte blanche to destroy your ship and kill you. Even if you don't, they will destroy your ship and kill you. Or hold you up, steal your cargo and then destroy you.


S.T.A.L.K.E.R: You run around in the Zone, getting shot at by criminals and slowly developing cancer. Or wander into a local negative space-time wedgie and get dissolved into molecyles.
If you succeed in spite of this, the macguffin will still defeat you.
 

Squilookle

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CaptOfSerenity said:
Since you could boil any game down to it's barebone basics, let's have some fun.
I always enjoy threads about this- I made one back in the day as well if you want to see more:

http://www.escapistmagazine.com/forums/read/9.241408-Your-horrible-pitch-for-good-games#8732458

Can't get enough of it meeself.
 

YouBecame

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May 2, 2010
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Homeworld :Build spaceships, point spaceships at other spaceships until either you or they run out of spaceships.
Binding of Isaac: Walk through basement trying not to die
Super Meat Boy: Get to your bandagey girlfriend.
 

Dr Jones

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Jun 23, 2010
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Shadowstar38 said:
So in Bioshock 2 your like, a scubba diver. And you do drugs that make that make people light up. And there is these little girls you grab. And thats about it.
That sounds goddamn awesome.