Make a Great Game Sound Boring

[TerribleAssassin]

Your in some massive castle looking for someone who's not from this planet.


And there's something that occasionally chases you.




And you shit yourself. Frequently.

 

[Durgiun]

Fallout New Vegas: kill a bunch of people for a power hungry asshole. With VATS.

 

[GeneWard]

In Portal, the objective is to walk into a window on one side of a room and come out of another on the other side of the room.

 

[Alien Mole]

Orcs Must Die!: you stand around waiting for the environment to kill green dudes. Sometimes you don't do that.

 

[Whateveralot]

You move blocks. Seriously, there are even mobs in that game that do exactly the same thing.

Gotta love Minecraft, though.

 

[trollogic]

Amnesia The Dark Descent - Walking around in a dark castle unlocking doors.
Half Life - Play as a mute scientist with a crowbar.
Skyrim - Go into dungeon. Kill bandits/zombies. Sell loot. Repeat.

 

[Xaio30]

Assassins Creed 2: You're this guy Desmond who spends all his days laying inside a computer to research ancient history. You get out of the computer every few hours.

 

[42]

Skyrim was good. Then it took an arrow in the knee.

he said make it sound boring not make it sound like a shit meme.

OT: Battlefield 3. just shoot people. go around in vehicles that handle like a hippo. impossible to fly jet planes that have shitty dog fights.

EVE Online: Excel Spreadsheet disguised as an MMORPG

 

[Seagoon]

Call of Duty: Modernwarfare 3... Oh wait...

 

[Danny91]

There's this purple dragon, and all it does is breathe fire on stuff and pick up gems.

That sounds a lot like Spyro, a series consisting of three games released in the late nineties and 2000 and which had no further games ever made for it. If anyone tells you they saw another Spyro game they're definitely just hallucinating.

 

[King of the Sandbox]

Go into any thread about Skyrim and look for the posts by people that don't know how to deal with non-linear games.

Do I win?

 

[Amaror]

Dwarf Fortress : lose

 

[Baron von Blitztank]

Uncharted series - Run around and climb shit
Tomb Raider series - Run around and climb shit. Now with boobs!
Portal - Shoot holes at blank, white walls
Mass Effect 2 - Mine planets and deal with your crews family issues.
Doom - Walk through grey corridors and find keys
Duke Nukem 3D - Walk through grey environments, find keys, hear one-liners from movies.
Bulletstorm - Shoot dudes to make words appear
Just Cause 2 - Blow up the same buildings over and over and over again.

Visual Novel genre - Press a button and read.
FPS genre - Shoot the dudes, hide behind rocks, go the end of the room. Rinse and repeat.

Games in general - Press buttons and things happen

 

[Weealzabob]

Assassins Creed 2: You're this guy Desmond who spends all his days laying inside a computer to research ancient history. You get out of the computer every few hours.

I approve of this message

 

[DracoSuave]

You climb a set of stairs.

Then some guy asks you about commitment.

 

[sgt. soap mctavish]

serious sam: Fight big things, go to drab locations.

 

[starkiller212]

Gears of War: You hide behind stuff and occasionally pop out and move to the next hiding spot.

Total War: Watch infinite clones of roughly 20 unique guys line up and hit each other for hundreds of hours.

Crysis: Activate Camo and walk through some (concrete) jungle

WWII Online: Spawn alone, walk 5 miles in real-time towards the nearest battlefield, fall sideways and black out, and repeat (without ever knowing what killed you). As a bonus, lose $15 each month

Dragon Age: Read hundreds of pages about a depressing fictional world, and click some stuff in between.

Mount & Blade: Stab everyone who's not your color to get better stuff for stabbing. When you get tired of that, switch colors and stab everyone who's your original color. When even that gets boring, make your own color and just stab ALL the people. (Note: there are also some fetch quests in there, if you seek them out)

 

[Right Hook]

Pong: you move the white line and avoid letting the square leave on your half of the screen.

 

[Arrzarr]

knights of the old republic is a fetch quest where you roleplay as a group of douchebags who have no idea what they're doing

 

[King of the Sandbox]

I remember an old arcade game that was basically sticking your mitts into a couple of weird handles and then spazzing out with them to knock the guy on the screen out for a 10 count.