So my mom tried to get me to come 'out of the closet...'

[WolfThomas]

Could be worse though, one time my sister's boyfriend went camping with some (male) friends, his mother told him to be safe and gave him a packet of condoms.

ive got to remember that next time my brother goes camping with all male friends. it will be hilarious.

I assume she didn't believe it was just guys going, but yeah it's pretty funny.

 

[Necator15]

Most awkward I had was... Let's see.
Well, being confronted with a printout of some porn website by my mother and being informed I was grounded for... A week, I believe. Might've been two.
Which itself isn't very awkward. I mean, yeah kind of awkward. What was awkward that I'd never been on that site and my younger brother recently entered a phase called "Teenager."

I was both blamed for porn, and suddenly knew what my brother watched. Not a fun day. OH! Then my mum decided to tell my sister all about it. Which is just... Ehhhhhhhhhhhhhh, why?

So not as awkward as some, but god damn.

For context, I was fifteen.

 

[Zechnophobe]

In middle school I joined the wrestling team. After one day at practice I was asked by my mum, "So how does your penis compare to the rest of the boys?"

I really didn't know how to respond to that. I was only 14. W.T.F.

I don't care what anyone else has said or will say, only a few others were actually awkward, and none even fucking touched this one.
You win this thread, in my mind, at the very least.

If you have anymore stories, please tell them.

I think his name is "Kenta". ust going out on a limb here.

 

[superbatranger]

Well, my mom apparently thought my step dad had gotten me a hooker. Which means she thought I wasn't a virgin. Took me a while to make her realize she was way off.

 

[Danik93]

Well, I had a great (rolls eyes) one today.

Edit: Oh yeah, and my mom has several times jokingly told me that she got me in order to get out of military service.

Is military service in Norway compulsory for women? :|

Yes. Though, you can refuse, and instead have to do social service.

Or, well, it's a bit complicated now. A while back, almost all people had to do military sevice; but these days the military doesn't want you if you have a small injury.

Why on Earth does Norway of all places have compulsory military service? I can't think of anybody who'd want to attack you guys.

SOMEONE MIGHT WANT OUR OIL!! WE NEED TO PROTECT IT, IT'S OUR OIL!!!!!!!

Spoiler: I could not find the comic I wanted. This will have to do.

On a serious note, it might have something to do with tradition. We have had laws about compulsory military service since the viking-age. Also, we were infact invaded by Germany in 1940-something. You see, due to the country's geography, it is of incredible strategic value in naval warfare.

We also have a small population (under 5 million), so to be able to keep a military running, we almost have to have compulsory military service.

Also, we have realized that times are peaceful, so we are scaling down the military. They did not want me, for example.

Giving up Norway was our biggest mistake... We could have been much more rich Just you wait... It will be ours!

 

[Zechnophobe]

Okay, awkward conversation time. Opening a Dildo on my birthday that was meant for my twin sister. It was from my mother. It had the cryptic message "Just Between Us, a little hand-me-down."

Okay, I made that one up... but I wanted to be cool like you guys. The only awkward conversation were probably had the first time my father pointedly explained how the 'history' in a web browser worked, and how to clear the history. Y'know, especially on the family computer. ESPECIALLY after being home alone all day. Especially.

 

[zombiejoe]

Dad - "So, I'm not sure I want to let you go up there!"
Me - "Dad, I've told you a million times! It was a joke okay?"
Dad - "Ok, but if I find out in a couple of years that you've had some kind of fucking gay club up there, I'm removing you from my will. Ok?"
#Click#

Suffice to say my only thought was "WHAT?"

well that was a random ending.

 

[Demongeneral109]

For some strange reason, my mom had to ask me if I was gay just because I never shown in interest in any women before.

*sigh* No, I'm not gay, I just haven't *found* any women that interest me yet. Do you know how hard it is to find tomboyish women the older you get?

Incidentally, I don't know how she would have reacted if I was gay. She has had some gay co-workers in the past, so I know she would at least be civil and even friendly with them but she also grew up in a different era, if you know what I mean.

Regardless, it's embarrassing when your own mother wants you dating pretty much any kind of women just so she can have grandchildren (and to be frank, I'm an okay guy and all but I don't think I'm father material...)

I sympathize...i felt the dating pressure, and i kinda regret asking out my current girlfriend... a good tomboy/tsundere is so hard to come by...

 

[K4ndY]

Telling my bible thumper dad I'm atheist...Yeah.

Now there's a can of worm I never intend to open with my "bible thumper" family.

OT;
Can't say I've really had any noteworthy awkward conversations with my parents, other than the obligatory sex talk.

 

[nico74]

I remember when my girlfriend told me she was surprised I asked her out because she said my sister thought I was gay.

 

[JunebugJuJuBee]

I told my mom I was bisexual right after she had finished espousing gay rights. She paused, looked down and quietly begged me to marry a man after I finished my "phase". I have since become more attracted to women and less attracted to men and haven't told her. I don't want that awkward, disappointed look again :\

Oh ma.

 

[FallenMithos]

Hmm...The most awkward was probably after Fanime. I told my parents I was going to crash at my friend's house for a couple of days, but when I came back with bunch of posters and a filled-up backpack, they started to question it. Anyway, after a few days, my dad said:"So, I'm sure you got enough H-games in there to last you through the year, right?" Suffice to say, apparently, they checked my backpack when I was taking a shower. Also turns out they knew I played them since I was a kid. Yeah...

 

[ModsDeleteThisAccountPlease]

My parents are fully convinced that I am anorexic and starve my self because I want to look like korean pop stars and therefor it is their duty as good parents to yell at me for eating correctly sized portions, to shove "Healthy" food like samosas and other Indian food down my throat, and berate me when I eat too much... American food.

Yeah, I thought it stopped making sense after the 8th word. I maybe be skinny(28 inch waist and male), but I eat a lot when I like the food.

 

[blankedboy]

Although I'm not Japanese, I speak Japanese, watch tons of anime, and have some anime posters up in my room.

my parents think I'm a weaboo, which I'm not

This thread is somewhat about coming out of the closet.

I think it might be time for you to do that.

Joke post better be joke.

 

[kikon9]

Ignore this post

 

[Addendum_Forthcoming]

What is your all-time most awkward and uncofortable conversation you've had with a parent?

Mine is pretty much summed up in the thread title, but I'd like to hear from others.

EDIT: No, I am not in the closet. I just happen to be a female who has male friends, is interested in carpentry and masonry work, and who doesn't put having a relationship high on the priority list.

Weird ... it's not exactly uncommon for girls to have male friends or enjoy machining o.o First long lasting romantic entanglement was because she liked motorbikes and pulling them apart <.<

And almost over tightening the oil plug on me when she cranked the torque wrench to 120ft-Pound instead of 65 o.o

Kinda funny becaue I was watching her ...

and it was like: "Okay 1 good, long rotation, good ... okay 2 ... okay 3 ... okay 4 .. 5? ... 6? 7?? ... Okay something is wrong here" XD

 

[tseroff]

Well this one is actually in my stand up routine, and I swear it happened. So my grandpa (my dad for all intents and purposes) was giving me the "talk." However, since he was a Vietnam vet, he had some "special" additions. One being the special barbed razor blade contraption that is designed to rip apart the penis. Ouch. That was the most impactful, with others including intentional STD spreading and the dynamite trick (AAGH!) So yeah, I'm still a virgin... (let me emphasize that this is by choice lol, not inability. I have turned down sex more than once) Even though I know it's probably unlikely that I would ever encounter any of these, I'm freaked out all the same

 

[ThePoodonkis]

I've learned to not tell them that I have friends who happen to be female. Every time I do, they tell me to ask her out. I'm not exaggerating, I mean every dang one.
Oh, and Getting told I was brainwashed by 'Obama and the Democrat agenda' because I don't hate homosexuals, Muslims, or non-Caucasian people. That was a fun one.

 

[nicholaxxx]

My mom was convinced I was a cross-dresser when she found out that the characters I'm most proficient with in fighting games are female, so...

 

[Wardnath]

Whenever my Asperger syndrome comes up in conversation (which is often) and they remind me yet again of how 'disabled' I am. I think that's a huge part of my depression.

I have yet to tell them all that I'm a bisexual. Oh boy, that's gonna be awkward. >_>