The cake game

[Azraellod]

If you look and highlight my post here [http://www.escapistmagazine.com/forums/read/362.144407?page=16#3514814], you'll see I still have the cake, and have done for a while. You're all very easy to manipulate.
[sup]Meh, revealing the existence of my master plan was easier then understanding everything written above.[/sup]

I place the cake inside a coconut, and hang it in a palm tree.

 

[ljd184]

i get a saw and saw the tree down and open the coconut

i put the cake in a land fill site

 

[heyheysg]

I get an excavator and dig up the cake.

After dusting off the cake.

I eat it.

 

[Earthbound Engineer]

[small]You eat the cake? How original. I've seen that at least a dozen times already on this thread.[/small]
I travel past the speed of light, and therefore start to go backwards in time. I stop at the point when you're about to eat the cake, and I kill you. I take the cake and I return to my own time.

However, when I return, I notice something is askew. Through some butterfly affect that occurred when I traveled back in time, I created a time paradox and the cake is now a ham sandwich.

 

[Sam G]

I headbutt you in the face, take the ham sandwich and bring it with me back to the dawn of time, where I ask God to turn the sandwich into cake. Then I hand the cake to God for safekeeping.

 

[FairlyFrightenedFeline]

I pray for a cake after years of loyal Christianity

I booby trap the cake

 

[Azraellod]

I take the cake and it explodes. I quickly remake it.

I place the cake in a box, then place another box next to it. I place a sign there saying Take one.

 

[ljd184]

lucky for me. this is the month that he shaves is so he found it and gave it to me

i give the cake to the poster after next

 

[Azraellod]

I wait patiently for the next poster to post...

 

[clairedelune]

I graciously accept the cake, and place it back in the oven.

 

[Azraellod]

I steal the oven, and take the cake from it once I am safe in my hideaway.

I attach the cake to a kite and cut it free in a strong gale.

 

[IMrAngryPantsI]

I shoot the cake down with a high-power sniper rifle.

I shoot it again and it falls into a pile of dirty needles.

 

[Sam G]

I burst out of my needle-den to discover a bullet-ridden cake! Oh, lucky day!

I give the cake to the ghost of Heath Ledger. Anyone who can best him in a fencing match may take the cake as a trophy.

 

[IMrAngryPantsI]

I challenge Heath to a fencing match, While he is busy laughing his ass off in a Joker-like manor, I shoot him in the face with my high-powered rifle.

I grab the cake, then I tap my shoes together and I phase out of existence. "Later jokes, The cake is mine." I hide in a non-existent tree in my plain of non-existence.

 

[Azraellod]

Erm... that's here. Our universe isn't real. I'll be climbing the tree and taking that, thanks.
You object? BANG. Now you're dead, and cant object.

I place the cake on a fishing rod hung over your head, leaving you to chase it for all eternity.

 

[ljd184]

since the cake dose not existence any more i bake a new one

i put the cake in a tank of hot water

 

[IMrAngryPantsI]

I pull it out of the tank. Since I feel no pain, it is simple. Sadly the cake is a bit soggy, so I hide it in the sun.

 

[Azraellod]

You idiot, you incinerated the cake. I cool down the sun, and use it to make a new cake, coincidentally causing an ice age.

I hide the cake under a pile of snow.

 

[Sam G]

I kick the snow while wearing my nice new wellies. Eew, the cake's all cold and wet...

I submerge this cake in a river of rum.