What has ruined YOUR life?

[T-Blade]

WELL... Coca-Cola, Ex-Girlfriend, WoW/CoH and My computer.
I have an extreme addiction to Coca-cola, about 6+cans of coke a day with atleast 2+ 2litre bottles. The reason why I started drinking Coke is because it made me happy and fun instead of being my anger issued self which would piss everyone off. I started drinking large amounts of coke after I realized that I was being a complete bastard to everyone and Coke seemed to calm me down. So I drank a few cans of coke and which grows everyday and if I do not have coke for a certain amount of time like 4+ hours without coke I start feeling sick and weak.
My ex-Girlfriend ruined my life because she really hurt me and I went into a complete Depressed state and i never went to school for 7 weeks (not including holidays) so my school work suffered and so did my social life... even though I never really had one.
My addiction to games is pure will and concentration and a bit of stubbornness, if I say right now, I am going to get to level 80 on WoW or level 50 on CoH I will pay for the game subscription and do it, Without rest, Without going to school, just sitting here playing a game to prove to myself that I'm not a failure.. although It never really does prove anything. I mainly game because of my brother, I've always thought of him as a hero in my eyes even though he isn't like that, even my mum realized that I copy him at some points without me even realizing. Well he got me into gaming and he's always been better so I practice really hard at something to beat him and when I do get good enough, he just goes onto another game and it really crushes my self esteem that I can't prove myself to him that I'm good enough :/
Now my computer, Right this is the most difficult one to put into words because this is pure addiction right here, I cannot go ONE day without going on my computer or ANY computer because I love going on and typing and gaming, Listening to music or even just going on MSN and I take it too the extreme I sometimes don't even go to sleep just stay up all night talking to people or gaming because I feel like I have to sit here and do it, and my school work and my whole life has gone plummeting down because of this and I wish I could stop it but I can't.
Well there's my life put into a few paragraphs, not all of it will make sense because I'm too lazy to make it have sense... Also for all you wondering I'm slightly anorexic aswell.

 

[orifice]

My lifes gone to crap so many times it's a bit difficult to pick out the worst. But I never really recovered from any of it. I have mental health issues, I live alone, and I haven't been in a relationship in 9 years because I'm too messed up and paranoid to be able to 'feel' anything anymore. cheery stuff aint it!?

 

[Im A Cuttlefish]

Drugs and Alcohol.

I used to have a dream, I still have it, but it is practically in tatters and I have no idea if I will ever follow it.

You may find it laughable, but my dream is to be in a band, as either the drumemr or singer.

Now, I honestly believe that if you put enough effort into something, then you can achieve it, nothing is impossible, not matter who you are or where you're from, if you have the will and try hard enough, you will achieve what you want to.

But then drugs and alcohol came along, now i'm only 17, and can't say I do them that much, but I know i#m hooked, I love them, they make things better, they take away from how I feel, and that is what ruins my dream.

I am faced with the choice of trying to get myself out of a mess, attempting to better myself and eventually make something, I could become what my heroes are, I could reject how most of society works and not take the normal option, I could be in a band and live a life of excitment of adventure.

Or, I could get a shitty minnimum wage job, jsut enough to pay for drugs and alcohol, and take the easy option, die alone, be nothing but also never have to try.

Now when faced with an option like that, and not believing in yourself, would you take the chance to follow your dream, or go back to having some coke and let the problems go away for an hour?

IF you choose option 1, you are infinately stronger than I.


(Note: I have not given up on my dream, I believe it is achiveable, and I still have time, I have years, but when I look forward and think of what i'll be, I don't see myself being in a band, I see myself taking drugs and throwing my life away).

I know I can change it, but really, why? What's so special about life? It's a meaningless existence where all we do is work and follow the conventions of society until we retire, at which point we live out our last days totally unhappy and left alone by the family we created because they are young and trying to be different to their parents, when they will turn out exactly like us.

Sigh, sorry for the rant, it's jsut bloody sad that I can tell people i'll never know in real life, but my closest friends would react the worst to knowing my problems.

 

[Avida]

"Well there is this girl..."

/sigh

Yup, same here... best friend... no chance...

Same aswell, although saying i had no chance is a little off, i got a few 'i love you's but it wasnt going to happen

I think every guy has one of those stories. Mine was several years ago. Set me back 10 years emotionally and financially. But life goes on and you recover.

The lesson I learned: listen to your family and friends. They can see things you disregard. You can save yourself a lot of time, money and your life by listening to an objective opinion. It may hurt at first, but you will look back with gratitude. This goes for anything.

Oh, dont you worry, im fine now, it just depressed me for a while and fucked with my freinds and gcse's. I think the whole objective opinion thing is a pretty good idea on paper, but trying to put it into pratice with the sort of skewed mind you have in such a situation isnt going to happen - if you can take onboard such an opinion, you're already on the road to recovery.

 

[magnus gallant]

My ex, you wouldn't believe how bad she hurt me. Been with depression for a while now because of it. Grades and friends have suffered because of it, dang it.

i am in the same boat my friend, after 2 years my girlfriend cheated on me, right after i bought her a diamond necklace, she had actually cheated before, juts hadn't told me

ever since then ive been depressed hardcore, i dunno, i don't want to say its ruined my life, it's just hard getting everything back together, getting my grades back up, trying to see other people, trying to keep busy, it's a rough/lonely time, but life goes on i suppose, and i have great friends

 

[NeedAUserName]

Over thinking things. I really do. I think of every possible outcome/reaction then decide basically nothing is worth doing, as the cons vastly outnumber the pros.

 

[CommandoUK]

...then i started to get drunk every weekend and i now smoke

Hmm, i do that anyway, but thats cause im Irish.[/quote]

Ahhhh, you crazy irish xD

Messed up the quote there :S

 

[D_987]

Wow, lots of people on The Escapist have some pretty depressing stories to tell =(

For me it would be being shy. I can't talk to people I don't know, or even people I see every day! When I try and speak I tend to whisper or stutter, and I can't really do anything to prevent it. Don't even get me started on having to perform presentations.

Its not exactly ruined my life (yet) but it has produced a lot of angry people who seem to think I'm ignoring them, because they can't hear me when I reply.

 

[Railu]

Quite an interesting story. I have a bad habit of telling the truth. It doesn't get me in enough trouble to seriously affect my life, but it sure as hell pisses of some of my teachers and the administration, and I'm sure if I went back to my church any time soon I'd get a few mean glares.

I have the opposite problem. I lie. A lot. About nothing important, and even when it wouldn't change anything if I told the truth, I just like lying, to see if I can get away with it, and to improve my lying skills, so that I become a better lier, so that I can lie about stuff, and be better at it.

There is a future in politics for you.

Attention Everyone!

Salute me, as your future President of Earth.

You could be. Unless you lied about how good you are at lying. In that case... wait... ahhh, my brain.

Yes, you're good.

 

[Vlane]

I ruin my life. I hate everything and everybody (there are a few exceptions).

Anyway my job also ruins my life. Don't get me wrong I love it but I work 15 hours a day and I only sleep 3-4 hours. Because of that I don't have much time for my hobbys or a girlfriend.

 

[C0RV4L0U5]

same for us all.... well at least me

 

[foolishnun]

I know I can change it, but really, why? What's so special about life? It's a meaningless existence where all we do is work and follow the conventions of society until we retire, at which point we live out our last days totally unhappy and left alone by the family we created because they are young and trying to be different to their parents, when they will turn out exactly like us.

Dude. Life is what you make it. I agree that it's pointless but that is precisely the reason you have to strive towards happiness. The point of life is to find what you like, which it seems you have and do it. Contentment. It seems you're not content with drugs and alcohol. You should start a band. Play with friends. play on your own make music.
I am also a drummer and lazy and I am guilty of liking drugs a bit too much sometimes. I know how you feel. I'm a music student and in the first year I hardly played, I just partied and drank and freaked out. I somehow passed and just before the start of the second year I completely freaked out, thinking what the fuck am I doing how can I possibly get up to speed with everyone else. I was out of practice, and had lost a lot of confidence in my playing I did it tho, slowly I found people who I was ok playing with and I've now got some people I can make music I like with, and I'm proud of that. You don't have to be hugely successful but you do have to make stuff you like. That's what will make you happy
[/waffle]

 

[Reversed Insanity]

I have this odd habit of isolating myself from my friends and breaking off all connections with them which I like to call the purging. I do it every 2/3 years but have no idea why I do it. Sad thing is I'm in the process of doing it now.

Other than that I find I love my privacy way too much. I get edgy when people come into my room and it also stops me from getting in a relationship as I see it as an invasion of my privacy.

 

[latenightapplepie]

Am I the only one who thinks the word 'ruin' in the topic question is a little strong? Maybe I'm just very naive and believe that it's actually difficult to ruin one's life. Yeah that's probably it.

Anyway. Nothing...as of yet. I believe I have a serious fear of committment, responsibility and failure so that could be my undoing. But hey, everyone has that right?

 

[Programmed_For_Damage]

Not being able to fully commit to things. It's ruined my life and the lives of plenty of women who date me.

 

[Hunde Des Krieg]

I was put in a hospital school (rehabilitation) for grade 6. I was always getting into fights at school, with one kid in particular. He hated me because I was younger than him, born in December I was just before the cut-off so I got into school a year early for my age, whereas he was also a December birth, but just after the cut-off. For some reason he hated me for that, me being a year younger than him and in the same grade, and he'd always shitkick me in the playground. Both of us were expelled for continually fighting, so having one's head kicked in is fighting I guess. I was transfered to a rehab school (day student only thankfully) which cut me off from all my friends and my crush I'd been in love with since forever, and being locked away drove me kinda insane. The forcing Ritalin on me didn't help much either, no I wasn't ADD, I was being bullied. How many kids are going to pay attention in class when they're expecting a curb-stomping once the bell rings for lunch?

Well after grade 6, me and my family moved to another city, so I was TOTALLY cut off from all my friends. Things weren't better for me there, first being the new kid, then being picked on again by another classmate older than me (he was flunked a year). The move to the island created health problems, I developed severe asthma and the medication they put me on for it caused me to gain weight like crazy. I went from being a skinny, energetic kid who was in Badminton, Gymnastics, Tae Kwon Do, Swimming and Skiing, to an obese teen who couldn't so much as jog without collapsing.

My parents still claim one of the reasons we moved was to give me a new start because I was always in trouble at school. They never listened to my side of things. Well I got a new start alright. And I'll never forgive them for it. When the asthma began to develop, they never believed I had a problem, they just figured I was getting lazy because I played on the computer too much. It took three years on the island before they finally took me to a doctor to test for breathing problems, and the doc nearly hit them when he found out what I'd been through. My asthma could have been prevented/controlled, my weight gain wouldn't have happened if the asthma was caught earlier, and I could still be an active and attractive person instead of a 300+ lb computer geek, all if my parents ever listened to me.

So yeah, I've had my life ruined, and a lot of people claim their parents ruin their lives, but it's rarely true. But my parents definitely played their part.

Damn, if this was a competition you'd win, I thought my life was shit, but damn, you sure help me put it in perspective. I totally feel for you dude. Hope you can still turn it around.

 

[xitel]

Well, if you had asked me this two years ago, I would have said that the time when a man in a parking attempted to run me down. He came after me even when I doged out of the way of his first attempt, but I managed to get behind several solid iron poles to keep him away. My nerves were shot for months after that. I couldn't go near a car with someone in it, tires screeching almost made me start to cry, and I was all together just scared of almost everything. Not to mention, I could barely force myself to get onto the bus to get to school in the morning. It was one of those things that makes you realize your mortality, and I was only 15. Not the age at which you want to have that happen.

But now I would actually call that a good thing, although this is probably not the thread for that explanation. I will say that cars still freak me out a bit, and I can't cross an intersection if there are cars there without almost breaking down again.