What would you have done in my situation?

[Hawk eye1466]

I would have done the same thing but mabye instead of "ha ha not a chance"
I might have said something different like "so lemme get this straight he's been an asshole to me and my friends ever since we've known him and now you want my help? yea right have fun suffering you pretentious little fuck wad."

But than again the guy that has been bugging me has been stealing my stuff and making me have to go out and buy new stuff like a replacement charger for my laptop or my homework or getting the teachers to search my locker because he's such an honor student and said he thought he saw pot in my locker and you know what they found? A FUCKING salad and now the teachers won't stop watching me in the halls. (I'm sorry its been a bad couple of days)

 

[Red Right Hand]

I think OP is begin more of a prick than the guy with cancer could have possibly been. Even if you don't like the guy show a little respect for him.

Thats a dick move man. He's got cancer you wank, and you're complaining about some petty shit that happened to you?

Fucking grow up and stop being so embittered.

I like you.

Why thank you, I see you have a Fear and Loathing avatar, which means i'm highly likely to like you as well.

 

[T8B95]

Not particularly a dick move. A bit cold, but if I were there I probably would have said something similar before I could stop myself.

There's nothing worse you can give someone, in my opinion, then fake pity. I don't like being pitied by my closest friends, imagine how I would feel about someone I disliked.

I also don't believe in compassion being automatic. You have to earn it, and getting cancer doesn't make earn it. From what the OP says, the guy hasn't earned his compassion.

 

[Simmo8591]

I'm not just going to pile on with the 'your the devil for not being more compassionate' speech but teenage years arent easy for anyone, I went into school wanting to be everyones best friend and a complete goody goody who would never break a rule, I stuck by my principles of always being the smug kid who was technically right but boring as hell.

This got me to be very unpopular with some of the guys i lived with (boarding school) and they used to pick on me, we had a lot of fights and for a year i really hated them. But as we moved up the years and all matured a bit, I learned to relax and be less uptight, they learned that I could be more fun and we ended up good mates by the time school ended.

My point is that people can and do change, and over far less serious things than illness, people grow and mature and tho it may be hard to hear from a complete stranger OP, your probably going to mature a lot too. It may be easy to be the quiet kid who thinks hes very mature and grown up but acting offhand and non-committal isn't actually how most adults behave. In a few years you may actually get along with the guy, even if your not best friends wouldn't you feel bad if he found out that you snubbed his charity event?

In my opinion you could do a lot worse than attending the event. you don't have to be loud or the centre of the event but extending an olive branch to someone who's going through a tough illness is actually what real adult maturity is all about

 

[Kurokami]

Right, so, some background information!

Earlier this school year, someone in my year at school was diagnosed with a pretty rare cancer. So he hasn't been in school since the beginning of the year. Now, I'd like to point out that this guy was always a total prick. I mean, I never had a conversation with him that didn't involve him being an utter asshat towards me for no reason. I'd also like to point out that a lot of other people never used to like him either.

So, there's a charity event on this weekend, and upon being asked if I was going to go, I replied with a very firm no, by which I said "Haha, not a chance."

So, why won't I support my year mate, I was asked, as "HE'S SO BRAVE TO FIGHT THROUGH THIS!"... Apparently.

I won't support him because he's the most arrogant tool I've ever talked to in my life, and apparently everyone else in my year totally forgot this when he got diagnosed. Really? I mean, it's like when Michael Jackson died, I seemed to be the only person I know who actually remembered the fact that he was a bad person (y'know, the whole, holding his child over the railings of a balcony quite high up, and the sleeping with children [I never implied he had sex with them, shut up before you flame me]).

So, yeah, question's simple, what would you have done?

If my mom hadn't recently passed away from cancer, I probably would have had a reaction very similar to yours.

Having been with her from when she was diagnosed to her passing just a few weeks ago, I've seen what a horrible disease it is. I've seen what it does to your body and seen some of the effects it has on the mind. I wouldn't wish that horrible disease on anyone, no matter how bad of a person they might be. No one deserves to die like that. Even if he does get treatment and does go into remission, there's always a risk that he'll get it again. Even with treatment, he's going to have to face the very real fact that it may very well kill him one day.

First of all, sorry or your loss and all that, it doesn't mean much coming from a source you don't know, but it stands non-the-less. I also hope you don't take offense to my following comments but...

OP didn't wish cancer onto this person, he simply lacks any real care for that person, which in my opinion is perfectly understandable as to him he was just an asshole. If like you, he had someone close to him pass, he would be faced with empathy because it was someone close to him that had passed, not because of a realization of the disease itself. His feelings seem to be perfectly just, as are you yours, but the contexts are completely different.

(Just reread and I think I just restated your own point, sorry for that!)

 

[inFAMOUSCowZ]

Good for you, just because he's mean doesnt mean he should have people care for him.

 

[Pirakahunter788]

From my point of view, you seem more of an asshat than he does.
It's one thing to not help someone who's done you harm. It's another to laugh about it as though he deserved it.

 

[Galliam]

Life lesson, thanks to me being on the opening swing of facebook, I kinda got in on that whole "everyone you ever were slightly aquainted with in High School adds you as a friend" faze. One of the few people in my high school that I basically despised, well I talk to that kid more than I talk to 95% of people I was actually friends with.

Something to think about.

BUT, I wouldn't go to a charity event for someone unless I was very personally involved in their life. Some kid I barely like? I wish him well, but Im not gonna throw money at his treatment either. I might feel differently if I had any serious amount of money to give though.

 

[Kurokami]

From my point of view, you seem more of an asshat than he does.
It's one thing to not help someone who's done you harm. It's another to laugh about it as though he deserved it.
If you choose to go down the road of revenge, be prepared to dig two graves.

Revenge and spite are two very different things, just saying, that saying is pretty out of place.

 

[Amondren]

I'd agree to go and just not show up. Sure he's a dick doesn't deserve to die though, nothing particularly brave about fighting cancer now a army of Orcs thats a different story.

 

[claymoreguy18]

I probably would have done something similar but I would simply have said "no" I think it was the laughing part that set people off. If they asked me why I would not be attending I would tell them that I do not like that person and will not go out of my way to help him Everyone is dying some people just get there quicker.
I'm apathetic not sadistic.

 

[funguy2121]

Right, so, some background information!

Earlier this school year, someone in my year at school was diagnosed with a pretty rare cancer. So he hasn't been in school since the beginning of the year. Now, I'd like to point out that this guy was always a total prick. I mean, I never had a conversation with him that didn't involve him being an utter asshat towards me for no reason. I'd also like to point out that a lot of other people never used to like him either.

So, there's a charity event on this weekend, and upon being asked if I was going to go, I replied with a very firm no, by which I said "Haha, not a chance."

So, why won't I support my year mate, I was asked, as "HE'S SO BRAVE TO FIGHT THROUGH THIS!"... Apparently.

I won't support him because he's the most arrogant tool I've ever talked to in my life, and apparently everyone else in my year totally forgot this when he got diagnosed. Really? I mean, it's like when Michael Jackson died, I seemed to be the only person I know who actually remembered the fact that he was a bad person (y'know, the whole, holding his child over the railings of a balcony quite high up, and the sleeping with children [I never implied he had sex with them, shut up before you flame me]).

So, yeah, question's simple, what would you have done?

I wouldn't say charity is compulsory, else it would cease to be charity. So no one should lay an expectation such as this at your feet. However, and I'm being honest here as you asked for our opinions, my reaction to "Haha, not a chance" is what an asshole. That was my first thought. So this guy, whom we can all admit is a kid, was always a dick. And now, still a teen, he finds out he has cancer. Has it ever occurred to you that he may be a dick no more? Cancer has a way of affecting people like that sometimes.

I'd say drop the grudge.

Also, and I just as guilty of conjecture here as you, I heard that after Jackson's death all of his now-adult accusers came forward and said it was a scam set up by their parents. As for the baby-dangling, I'd say he was both crazy and reckless. Michael Jackson was treated like a crazy person by his father and then by society, and he responded-by becoming a crazy person. There's not much evidence at all to suggest that he's a bad person. Now that LaToya - SHE'S an asshole

 

[Aurora Firestorm]

A dying jerk is still a jerk, but that doesn't give anyone an excuse to be holier than thou about the fact that he's dying. By refusing to have a modicum of sympathy for someone who is going through one of the most harrowing diseases he can, you're dropping to the same level as you seem to perceive him being on.

Arrogant prick-ery aside, you don't know why that guy was an ass or what his story was. Maybe you can't bring yourself to like him, whatever, but at least help a guy not die. If you really do hate him so much that you don't want to go to a charity event for him to help his treatment, at least have the grace to say that you have a prior engagement, or some other social white lie. Instead, you just came off like a vindictive jerk who can't get over the past, or who wouldn't at all care if this guy died.

And if the latter sentence is true, I guess my immediate opinion reflects the post above me: "man, that guy is a real jerk." You know, holding grudges sucks for you far more than it sucks for whoever else it is -- because frankly, whoever you don't like, probably doesn't give a crap that you don't like them. They do, however, give a crap about living.

 

[Killertje]

He should get money from people who like him. That way he reaps what he sows.

People who get a disease aren't brave. People who risk their life willingly are brave (or stupid). And not committing suicide doesn't count.

 

[Tharwen]

Dying doesn't make you a nice person, Cancer doesn't make you a Saint. It's Jade Goody syndrome I tells ya.

I was away on a DofE expedition (no TV/radio/phones etc.) when she died, and one of my friends on it heard on the radio on the way back.

His response? "Shit, I missed it! The stupid ***** died and I missed it!"

 

[thecoreyhlltt]

It was more the way you replied, I think.

If you had said something along the lines of "No because of *Insert reason here*, but I wish him well.", instead of going "Haha, not a chance.", you probably wouldn't have received the response you've gotten.

see i disagree, given the fact that he's a total douche cancer or not you shouldn't change how you regard him.

i would've said the same thing, probably throw a "fuck that guy" in there somewhere, but then again a lot of people have told me i can be an asshole sometimes.

YA DUN GOOD KID

 

[Rewdalf]

Well.
It'd probably go something like this.

"Wow. Cancer. That must suck..."

I wouldn't go, obviously, because I know people like the person you described, and I have no desire to be associated with them in any way.
Plus, they probably wouldn't do the same for me, so why should I feel sorry for him just because everyone else is?
Yes, cancer does suck, but he's got a family and friends who will worry about him, and ultimatley that worry won't do shit. The cancer will either be cured or it will kill him, and the only person or group of people who have a say in the matter is the doctor or hospital that's treating him...
Cold? Maybe. But it's the truth, and the truth hurts.
[/corny response]

 

[Socks and Shoes]

It was more the way you replied, I think.

If you had said something along the lines of "No because of *Insert reason here*, but I wish him well.", instead of going "Haha, not a chance.", you probably wouldn't have received the response you've gotten.

see i disagree, given the fact that he's a total douche cancer or not you shouldn't change how you regard him.

i would've said the same thing, probably throw a "fuck that guy" in there somewhere, but then again a lot of people have told me i can be an asshole sometimes.

YA DUN GOOD KID

Obvious troll is obvious.

4/10

 

[KILGAZOR]

Being a dying person doesn't mean people are obligated to be nice to you. The politically correct pussies that run human society would like to have you think that, but it's not true. In a sense, we're all dying, just because someone's gonna get it sooner rather than later doesn't change anything.The reason people are generally compassionate to the dying is that they are sad to see a good person go. However, you're happy to see the dude gone, so why be compassionate?

Besides, if he was an asshole to you, why would he want you to come anyways?

Sorry but no, at the risk of probation that was without a doubt the single biggest and most comprehensive act of dickishness I have read about on here in the last two and a half years. Seriously, you came across as Prik'tor, lord and master of the pricks. I am frankly aghast at the sheer callousness and all round sociopathy that could have ever led you to think that this was an appropriate reaction.

Obvious troll is obvious.

Also if you think the OP is a sociopath then you need to go out and meet people more often, cuz people like him are a dime a dozen.

You did the right thing, OP.

 

[Dango]

Dying might not make you a better person, but being a jerk to someone who's dying makes you a worse person than they ever were.

I would have donated a bit, but honestly I don't think I'd stick around for he charity.