Don't worry, we would still have the friendzone threads and the foaming rage of whatever game ending people don't like next, lol.SpectacularWebHead said:
Women aren't Babies
- Thread starter Clearing the Eye
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It does suck that there is little more than shrugging it off to be done. But stopping people online from being assholes is one hell of a challenge, lol. We've been trying for the past twenty years or so. I think the message behind it is not to let douchebags who have nothing going for them in life to get to you.lord.jeff said:
I don't really know how bad women have it online, but saying it's more frequent is not fact,it can't be.(I don't really know though). I mean I've played quite a few Moba style games and I've played it a lot and in almost every match I've played there has been someone being flamed, being called all sorts of things. I've seen a shitload of comments on youtube that attack every person that they disagree with. and I have been called things on youtube for just trying to say they are wrong.
I think the only difference is that flaming against women are like "Get to the kitchen!" and other variables of such.
I think the only difference is that flaming against women are like "Get to the kitchen!" and other variables of such.
It's not as complicated as it sounds. A relationship (just about any kind of relationship) is an organic and dynamic thing in constant flux and made of many parts. You can't look at it like a single piece of rope being pulled between two people, that oversimplifies things way too much. People change, positions change, things always change for better or worse. No one side dominates the other, but one side will always have more say or a stronger position than the other in aspects of the relationship dynamic.Clearing the Eye said:
Longer examples follow...
A woman put pregnancy into perspective for me not long ago. She said that during a relationship, no matter who's focused on whom, when a child comes into the dynamic attention will shift more to her. She's pregnant, people will be fawning over her, looking to take care of her, pampering her, while he is largely left out, or has to work harder to care for her during the pregnancy. This then moves the the child, once born, who will then receive most of the attention (in both cases inside and outside of the immediate relationship) where again he is more or less sidelined. This will at times be difficult (if only subconsciously) for her because she was receiving exceptional amounts of attention that has now shifted elsewhere. Through all of this, if she so decides, she could be doing her part to ensure that he does not feel left out, even though for the most part that is exactly what he is; merely a body to labor on behalf of her and their child. She can choose to do this or make it more about herself (which again a lot of women I've known have expressed disgust at this sort of behavior).
So during the relationship, prior to pregnancy, he could have been more dominant in the relationship in aspect such as receiving attention or affection, but that position changes dramatically from him to her during pregnancy, then slightly away from her to be shared with the child after birth.
Which reminds me, it's extremely rare that a man is given majority of guardianship of a child in the event of parental separation, generally this favors the mother, yet he is more financially liable either during the relationship (let's presume married for the sake of this example) and after the relationship, even though he has fewer rights with regard to the child.
I am waiting on "Make Dead Space 3 whole" (Can't take credit for that, though I forget who made it up) or "Finish the fight...again".Clearing the Eye said:
Actually every connection on the internet is run by someone, and they have the right to put in any rules they like and anyone who breaks those rules they can block them and remove anything they added to the site. The Escapist in fact has rules. Most servers have rules and it shouldn't be hard to find a server with them and the admin need merely be informed of rule breaking like verbal abuse and they are out.
You may be fine with teasing but that doesn't mean women should have to tolerate misogyny, nor should in fact other people have to sit in silence and tolerate intolerance because they flirted with their boyfriend.
The important thing is these connections want people to connect to them, so server admin will enforce no verbal abuse rules to make sure people don't leave, ditto for websites and so on. The Boss enforces rules that protect as many people as possible.
Women aren't more emotional than men, they just take it differently. Where a man is MORE LIKELY (not speaking in absolutes here) to get angry and wrathful from abuse a woman is more likely to get depressed and passive.
I've notices something about internet abusive mic spam, how similar it is to this:
Hmm correlation between verbal abuse and negative reinforcement as a motivator?
You may be fine with teasing but that doesn't mean women should have to tolerate misogyny, nor should in fact other people have to sit in silence and tolerate intolerance because they flirted with their boyfriend.
The important thing is these connections want people to connect to them, so server admin will enforce no verbal abuse rules to make sure people don't leave, ditto for websites and so on. The Boss enforces rules that protect as many people as possible.
Women aren't more emotional than men, they just take it differently. Where a man is MORE LIKELY (not speaking in absolutes here) to get angry and wrathful from abuse a woman is more likely to get depressed and passive.
I've notices something about internet abusive mic spam, how similar it is to this:
Hmm correlation between verbal abuse and negative reinforcement as a motivator?
Some people respond to it like that, but the issue isn't precisely with what the word directly means (male homosexuality, or a cigarette butt if you're British). The issue is the feeling behind those who often use the word - as you said[footnote]about them saying[/footnote], "Of course it is [a bad thing to be gay]". While there are some people can just shrug off people insulting something that is an important part of yourself, repeated verbal and emotional whalings have a tendency to take their toll on a person. And when such hateful attitudes are a pervasive part of the culture, it makes it even harder to just ignore it.Clearing the Eye said:
Its offensive because ****** means a pile of sticks used to burn Homosexuals way back in the day. So far it keeps said meaning among Homosexuals and still exists for one simple thing: the intent to hurt. It doesn't mean that your gay, it means that you should be burned to death. The latest definition has no real intention other then "YOUR GAY" which isn't offensive, but the word back in time was highly offensive.Clearing the Eye said:
All ****** means now is a throw away swear like many others, but it is still a derogatory term used against Homosexuals, just not online anyways where words change definitions.
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Simply put : Woman = people therefore should be treated like males who = people thus everyone should be treated fairly because humans = people.
Bam, done. Just treat each other nice and don't stop each other from being nice because you think its patronizing, their just trying to be nice dammit.
I don't care about anybody else but i for one:
When will people just accept men and women are actually different?
They are both humans and women.
I AM much stronger and more capable of defending myself and others than my girlfriend is, if and when the time arises i will always protect her. I also would for other vulnerable women for that matter, if a woman is being hit by a man should i not "protect her".Clearing the Eye said:
I treat women different to men.
When will people just accept men and women are actually different?
See above.
They are both humans and women.
Bonnie Tyler wants a word with you.Clearing the Eye said:
OT: But in all seriousness, the reason people do it is because a certain outspoken minority act like bimbos and think men will save them because they're hot. I know it's unfair to generalize and it's not your fault, and I don't do it, but shit happens, y'know?
Then why do they cry all the time?Clearing the Eye said:
Then why do they always pursue larger mates?Clearing the Eye said:
Then why keep up the knight in shinning armor bit?Clearing the Eye said:
Then why ask for chivalry?Clearing the Eye said:
Then why acknowledge they're women?Clearing the Eye said:
Perhaps it's just my personal experience, but every god damned time I read something like this people continually make bold generalized statements which are almost always inherently contradictory to individual desires. And when you call them out on it, suddenly the generalizations are damaging stereotypes and your perceptions were obviously inaccurate to begin with.
So I'm not suppose to comfort them, because they don't need to be protected, because they can fight their own battles, because they're the same as everyone else and I should treat them like everyone else. Ok, I'll pat them on the back like a buddy and tell them to man up. Wait... no... that would be gender discriminatory. Ack, I can't keep track of this shit!
Oh yeah, that's totally true. But it's not specifically tailored to the group. It's just that it's so offensive towards another group that comparing someone with that term is an insult. And that's what it is, really, it's a comparison.Zen Toombs said:
It'd be like saying "You cried when he hit you? You're such a girl." except abbreviated and adapted for every day use.
I guess my point was just that while people call non-gays faggots, there's not really a word for straight white men that is used against other people in a derogatory fashion.
I feel like this thread is trying to compare things that suck by how much publicity they get on this site. This is kinda like calling someone out for complaining about a broken leg when there are starving children in India. Yeah, the children have it worse, but that doesn't mean that person's leg feels wonderful because someone else is suffering more than them. This site could stand to be a little more varied in its addressing of harassment issues (I've seen some frankly gut-wrenching racism on Youtube every time Muslims, Islam, or people of potentially Arab descent are vaguely hinted at, but Youtube is kinda the backwash of the soda that is the Internet), but this doesn't mean women are getting any more special treatment because you read a lot of articles on the Escapist about them.
Now, do women deserve more special treatment than any other minority ever, of all time? Ideally no, that would be silly. And if the League of Legends tribunal is any indication, people who use racial slurs are just as often shunned as anyone else. But I think the big problem is: it's easier to identify your sex over the internet than it is to identify anything else about you. This does not hold true in any game where there is no voice chat. So, it's pretty easy to see why Xbox Live gets the brunt of sexist accusations. Most women, however, don't complain online about these problems (I don't have any proof of this, but I'm pretty sure "most" of any demographic don't complain publicly about anything ever), they just quit playing multiplayer Xbox games (so says Extra Credits), meaning Microsoft doesn't get a dime per year from them for a problem Microsoft has the power to fix. And if 40% of the gaming population are women, that's 40% of the population that could be harassed into not wanting to play online. I think that's at least a good financial reason to be up-in-arms about women being harassed online.
Now, do women deserve more special treatment than any other minority ever, of all time? Ideally no, that would be silly. And if the League of Legends tribunal is any indication, people who use racial slurs are just as often shunned as anyone else. But I think the big problem is: it's easier to identify your sex over the internet than it is to identify anything else about you. This does not hold true in any game where there is no voice chat. So, it's pretty easy to see why Xbox Live gets the brunt of sexist accusations. Most women, however, don't complain online about these problems (I don't have any proof of this, but I'm pretty sure "most" of any demographic don't complain publicly about anything ever), they just quit playing multiplayer Xbox games (so says Extra Credits), meaning Microsoft doesn't get a dime per year from them for a problem Microsoft has the power to fix. And if 40% of the gaming population are women, that's 40% of the population that could be harassed into not wanting to play online. I think that's at least a good financial reason to be up-in-arms about women being harassed online.
Well its true and gets to the heart of the matter, much "feminist" concern is based on a patronizing view of other women who need to be protected as they are feeble and can't and shouldn't be expected to stand up for themselves. Sexism under the cloak of feminism...go figure.
and yes what is accepted for men tends to be far different than what is for women. 9 out of 10 prisoners are male, let that sink in, now imagine if that were a figure for womens concerns, something that disproportionate would cause immense outrage for women with fingers pointed in every direction, but when its men, its just accepted reality.
and yes what is accepted for men tends to be far different than what is for women. 9 out of 10 prisoners are male, let that sink in, now imagine if that were a figure for womens concerns, something that disproportionate would cause immense outrage for women with fingers pointed in every direction, but when its men, its just accepted reality.