You are surrounded by 300 Spartans and can have two pieces of modern day equipment...

Chronologger

New member
Apr 5, 2010
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Was that the one where a few hundred Thebans beat 1200 Spartans? What about Sphacteria, 425BC, where the Spartans were beaten by a gang of rowers? Or Lechaion 390 BC, where Athenian mercs royally fucked the Spartans? Spartans fought in phalanxes: slow moving, heavy infantry that was deadly in the front, but potentially very vulnerable to flank attacks. In the instances where Sparta lost, it was often because they lacked support from cavalry or light infantry. In otherwords, Spartans were the best at what they do best, but also very specialised.
A few hundred thebans and 1200 spartans? No, it was about 8500 under the Theban-Boeotian command and 10,000 under the Spartan command. As for the battle of Sphacteria, again, the Spartans were stupidly outnumbered, with about 400 men to their name stranded on that island against 3000 SOLDIERS PLUS 8000 rowers. Also, in the battle of Lechaeum* the numbers of men were so small it's barely worth mentioning, the mercenaries consisted of peltasts while all the Spartans had at that place and time were about 600 hoplites, melee infantry... caught out in the open. Details aside, the battle of Lachaeum was barely worth mentioning because Sparta still held a firm grip on the city of Lachaeum, it was no real loss on Spartas behalf.

Most of the fights you are referring to are situations where the Spartans were caught shit out of luck anyway. Either that, or situations where Spartan pride would not let them win, for example they often did lack cavalry and archers which cost them a few fights, but that is mainly because those roles in the spartan military were considered to be the most cowardly, and to be seen a coward in spartan society was so disgraceful to the extent that they would rather death.

Though devastating, the Spartans did eventually get wiped out at Thermopylae. It was the Athenians who actually went on from Sparta's sacrifice to beat the Persians elsewhere. It helps that the Athenians had a god damned navy, which Sparta skimped out on. A huge amount of the war effort was seen at sea, and though Athens was burnt to the ground in the process, the Athenians still provided almost the same number of troops to fight in the battle of the plataea. So don't go giving Sparta all the credit so soon.
The Spartans didn't get wiped out at Thermopylae, Leonidas and his guard did, Leonidas and his guard weren't the last of the Spartans... The rest of the spartan army went on to command the Battle of Plataea which was actually lead by Leonidas' nephew, Pausanias. Besides, I never claimed to give Sparta all the credit, I was just giving them credit specifically because the original post I was replying to discredited them. I haven't once DIScredited the Athenians or any other ancient Greek city state purposefully, The Athenian navy was a force to be reckoned with, If it wasn't for the Battle of Salamis I'm quite confident the Persians would have gained a much stronger hold on the ground they had already captured in Greece at the time of their arrival. Try not to assume that I'm one of those 300 fanboys just because I'm giving Sparta the credit it quite rightfully deserves.



By the way, the Spartans didn't actually "skimp out" on a navy, they made one during the Peloponnesian wars but as you so kindly pointed out previously, the Athenian navy were always superior, and thus the fleet was battered and bruised, but not until after the Spartan navarch (Admiral) Lysander launched a blockade on athens to support the siege laid down on Athens by king Pausanias and his men, which finally resulted in Athens surrender in 404BC.

:D
 

Jandau

Smug Platypus
Dec 19, 2008
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A Portal gun and some C4. Blue portal to a rock wall at a reasonable distance, drop C4 a few feet away from myself with the timer set to 5 seconds, orange portal under my feet, land and slap my hands over my ears. A third item (were it allowed) would be an umbrella to protect me from the rain of dead spartan body parts that will subsequently start raining down on me...
 

Calbeck

Bearer of Pointed Commentary
Jul 13, 2008
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My old M1A1, with full ammo.

I don't need the rest of the crew...everything but the loader's M240 is doable by one person on the inside, everything hatch-down.
 

DarkPanda XIII

New member
Nov 3, 2009
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A large sign and the Portal Gun. The large sign reads. "It was the Athenians" then portal my way out. Let the guys up north handle them x.x
 

OddOzZy666

New member
Jul 3, 2008
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An Atomic Bomb, and a Jackhammer.

I shall spew out some form of cool(ish) one liner before I get vapourised
 

Jnat

New member
Feb 1, 2010
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A tank, and if I can't have one, I would take a flamethrower. My second item would be fuel for the flamethrower.
 

WhatHityou

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Nov 14, 2008
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Scorpion tank from halo, It's one man operable and makes funny quips ala red vs blue. Secondly the power armor from halo for faster reflexes. Finlay a large machine gun / Gatling gun because if your not bring an automatic weapon or lots of explosives against 300 charging people you might as well let them steamroll you with massive amounts of unit's
 

pwnsore

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Apr 6, 2010
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WhatHityou said:
Scorpion tank from halo, It's one man operable and makes funny quips ala red vs blue. Secondly the power armor from halo for faster reflexes. Finlay a large machine gun / Gatling gun because if your not bring an automatic weapon or lots of explosives against 300 charging people you might as well let them steamroll you with massive amounts of unit's
Did you read anything that was in the first post? 2 Objects only, modern objects (not sci-fi) and small objects.
 

WhatHityou

New member
Nov 14, 2008
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pwnsore said:
WhatHityou said:
Scorpion tank from halo, It's one man operable and makes funny quips ala red vs blue. Secondly the power armor from halo for faster reflexes. Finlay a large machine gun / Gatling gun because if your not bring an automatic weapon or lots of explosives against 300 charging people you might as well let them steamroll you with massive amounts of unit's
Did you read anything that was in the first post? 2 Objects only, modern objects (not sci-fi) and small objects.
Well then I will change the tank to one of the us army's new'ish one or two man operable artillery pieces, The name escapes me And make the power armor a penutbutter and jelly sandwich
 

retterkl

New member
Oct 27, 2008
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Electric guitar + battery powered amp.

No Spartans are going to attack me while i'm rocking their world :)