My grandfather's only joke:
Why does a chicken coop have two doors?
Because if it had FOUR doors, it'd be a chicken SEDAN.
Why does a chicken coop have two doors?
Because if it had FOUR doors, it'd be a chicken SEDAN.
Your worst joke
- Thread starter BBLIZZARD
- Start date
Not exactly a joke but reminds of something I always wanted to try but have been too nervous to out of fear that A: it will get me slapped so hard my head is on backwards the rest of my life, and B: I don't a girl that likes me enough that it wouldn't backfire horribly.-Zen- said:
Basically go up to the girl and say "I bet you 20$ I can kiss you without using my lips." Then kiss her and give her the 20, telling her, "best 20$ I ever spent."
I doubt it would ever work though, as even in my dreams would I ever be anywhere near as smooth as Clive Owen.
Dude jokes like that are a big reason why just about every joke thread gets locked. I seriously suggest editing that out while you still have time. Or at the least put that in spoiler tags and then a warning on top of that. Not trying to be a jerk, just trying to offer some friendly advice.JHaakma said:
Mine involved a joke at the expense of several thousand recently deceased people on a fateful day in September. No one laughed but me, and I was only laughing because there is apparently no built in response to that level of tastelessness.
The joke also wasn't any good, so rather than climbing into a flamesuit if I repeat it here, I leave it to your imagination.
The joke also wasn't any good, so rather than climbing into a flamesuit if I repeat it here, I leave it to your imagination.
A man wakes up in a hospital. He says "Doctor, I can't feel my legs!" The Doctor responds "Of course not silly, we amputated your arms."
I was released early from school (along with the rest of the classmate) so we could be with our families when dealing with some tragedy or another, yes.iammatt95 said:
a guy is driving a van and heres a *clunk* in the back,
he stops
goes to the back
opens the door
and says "cookie u'd better stop or im gonna make you regret it"
the man starts drinving again, then heres the *clunk*
he stops
goes to the back
opens the door
"cookie ud better stop or else!"
the man reluctently starts the van again and drive 6meters before he hears a *clunk*
the man jumpins out of the van
throws open the doors and says
"thats it cookie!"
the man then throws the cookie into the ocean
funny right?
he stops
goes to the back
opens the door
and says "cookie u'd better stop or im gonna make you regret it"
the man starts drinving again, then heres the *clunk*
he stops
goes to the back
opens the door
"cookie ud better stop or else!"
the man reluctently starts the van again and drive 6meters before he hears a *clunk*
the man jumpins out of the van
throws open the doors and says
"thats it cookie!"
the man then throws the cookie into the ocean
funny right?
here's another
a man is planning to propose so he sets up this fancy dinner on a romantic cruise
the man is standing at the fromnt of the ship when the ship is hit by a wave,
knocking the man down and the ring into the ocean.
so the man says "well i might as well got to the dinner anyway and propose later"
the man meets up with his girl in the dining hall,
the man orders the soup and the women orders the Catch Of The Day
what do you think the women found in the fish???
the cookie.......
lol
a man is planning to propose so he sets up this fancy dinner on a romantic cruise
the man is standing at the fromnt of the ship when the ship is hit by a wave,
knocking the man down and the ring into the ocean.
so the man says "well i might as well got to the dinner anyway and propose later"
the man meets up with his girl in the dining hall,
the man orders the soup and the women orders the Catch Of The Day
what do you think the women found in the fish???
the cookie.......
lol
What do you call a psychic midget that just broke out of prison? A small medium at large.
The worst jokes ever are math jokes.
Two Imaginary numbers walk into a radical....
I wont even continue....
The worst jokes ever are math jokes.
Two Imaginary numbers walk into a radical....
I wont even continue....
...and I said "Rectum!? Damn near killed him" 
LULZ
Q: Whats blue and taste like red paint?
A: Blue paint WAKKADY SMACCKKADY DOOOO
LULZQ: Whats blue and taste like red paint?
A: Blue paint WAKKADY SMACCKKADY DOOOO
Whats the difference between a Pakistani and Pizza? People like Pizza. This was told to me by a Pakistani guy.
What do you say to a woman with two black eyes? Nothing, you already told her twice. Oh god I know this is bad xD
What do you say to a woman with two black eyes? Nothing, you already told her twice. Oh god I know this is bad xD