Zero Punctuation: The Legend of Zelda: Skyward Sword

[Mr Somewhere]

I don't mind people not liking it. But when people criticise it for being a rehash, that does annoy me. It isn't it honestly changes things up and does a good job at it too. The fact that a lot of critiques of the game gleefully ignore this is rather irksome.

Well, it does keep some feature the same. Some people are always going to call it uninnovative because of that, no matter what changes. You just have to accept it: you can't change what other people think. Just try and ignore it.

Oh yes. And of course it just isn't going to be everybodies cup of tea.

 

[KimberlyGoreHound]

Then which one is the worst?

Majora's Mask, obviously. Poorly implemented time travel mechanics (I sure thought having to sit there playing GameBoy while waiting for MM's time to advance far enough so I could do the next thing I needed to do multiple times was a shitty game design), criminally short main quest padded out with boring sidequests and the previously mentioned sitting around waiting for shit to happen, annoying mask transformations that make a lot of the gameplay a chore, and I could go on but FUCK this white background sucks, I need to get out of here.

I'm surprised to see this, 'cos I find Majora's Mask to be an absolute masterpiece (I wrote quite a long analysis of it versus Ocarina of Time). I never had trouble with the time travelling, and the mask transformations were quick. Hit the C button, hit A to skip the cutscene, done. Takes a second. Oh well.

Anyway, this is probably the biggest disagreement I've ever had with Yahtzee. I haven't played most of the games (95% or so) that he's reviewed, and for the ones I have played (like Bioshock, Saints Row 2 and Prototype), he actually had some nice things to say. This time, I think Skyward Sword, while the music isn't as good as Ocarina of Time, and the story isn't NEAR as good as the absolutely stunning storyline of Majora's Mask, the gameplay is just perfect in my opinion. I haven't noticed many shortcomings with the motion control, I find it extremely responsive, and it didn't take more than a couple minutes to be attacking sword enemies like a pro.

Isn't it weird that he shit on the game for using that boss where you swordfight, instead of using the dungeon item against the boss? I'm quite sure if they had made it so you used the Beetle to cut a line and hurt the boss, he's complain that the game was too predictable.

 

[geizr]

Yahtzee: Oh, I see you have a Sacred Cow. What would happen if we put this flaming match to it. Hunh! What do you know? It burns quite nicely.

Internet: HEATHEN!! HERETIC!! KILL THE INFIDEL!! ANNIHILATE HIM!! RENT HIS BODY TO PIECES, CREMATE THE REMAINS, AND SCATTER HIS ASHES TO THE FOUR WINDS!!! DEEEEESTRROOOOY HIIIIIMMMM!

I can just imagine the venomous, blood-vessel exploding rage about the internet at the idea of someone giving severe criticism to a Zelda game.

It's more that fact that the game isn't objectively bad. It's a good game. It's more that his opinion is confusing, than Zelda is some sort of shining example of gaming (which it isn't)

What's worse when some 'burns a sacred cow' or that someone is accused of being a frothing butthurt fanboy when they say 'hang on a minute its not THAT bad.'

I probably should have qualified that I, personally, do very much like the Zelda series(although I have yet to play this one; it is on my todo list, however). Regardless, you have to admit, there are certain circles of the internet that do treat the series as a Sacred Cow and get rather upset when any criticism is levied against the games.

 

[144_v1legacy]

It's hard to change he opinion of someone who's predisposed not to like something. Yahtzee was predisposed not to like anything with motion controls. This comes as no surprise to me, and simultaneously as a disappointment, as I'd hoped he'd be able to look past his personal dislike of motion controls, considering they work well.

 

[144_v1legacy]

but Skyward Sword is far from the "worst" Zelda game,

How dare someone disagree with you....

Yeah. How dare someone disagree with Yahtzee.
(Irony)

Most of those quotes deserved a lashing, but let's not be too quick to idolize Yahtzee either.

 

[Averant]

Isn't it weird that he shit on the game for using that boss where you swordfight, instead of using the dungeon item against the boss? I'm quite sure if they had made it so you used the Beetle to cut a line and hurt the boss, he's complain that the game was too predictable.

That wasn't really shitting on it as much as making fun of it. His next line was "THAT'S BREAKING THE ZELDA RULE!" And his character was making an OMG face.

If that's not Yahtzee sarcasm, I don't know what is.

 

[FallenMessiah88]

Well, a lot of the critism towards a new game usually has to do with it being either unrefined or unpolished or both, so I personally don't see anything wrong with each Zelda game essentially being a new iteration of the previous one, just like Mario.

Take that back. Mario is a very original game and apart of the odd stray in recent years they have all featured vastly diverse mechanics that exploit platforming in clever and unique ways.

I should probably have worded that differently. I wasn't talking about all the Mario games, only the sidescroller's, like New Super Mario Brothers and New Super Mario Brothers Wii. Also, im not saying that they are all the exact same games, just that the core aspects has remained relatively unchanged.

You're right though, that every major Mario game has been totally different from the last.

 

[Tmcmistress]

As someone who's been playing Zelda since it's inception, I'm honestly kind of baffled by the complaints directed at Skyward Sword of constrained exploration and questing areas. At what point exactly did Zelda, in particular post OoT-Zelda, become some sort of open world explore-fest with activities galore, rather than a large, mostly lifeless main field with a few hidden bits that you had to get through on Epona in order to get to the next *actual* area?

It may just be a personal thing, but I play these games for the story, the Zelda mythology, and the dungeons. Not for the random hidden cave in the left-hand corner of the map with the 100-rupee piece and the lone fairy. Skyward Sword having streamlined the main field, and not even by all that much is, imo, both a flawed complaint and no big loss.

That said, much of a Zelda fan as I am, it's completely brainless and the worst sort of fanboyism to come here and ***** about Yahtzee daring to have a different opinion. It's Yahtzee, he's never been a huge Nintendo fan and he's definitely never liked motion controls. What exactly were you expecting? It's like everyone who was ready to lynch the one reviewer who gave SS a 7.5/10 instead of a 10/10 like everyone else. Calm down. It's ok, really.

 

[Mudkipith]

Best review in a while, and one I completely agree with.

On a side note I now have to bookmark ZP and watch the videos in fullscreen to avoid having to look at or use this painful new layout... It hurts my eyes.

 

[Moonlight Butterfly]

As someone who's been playing Zelda since it's inception, I'm honestly kind of baffled by the complaints directed at Skyward Sword of constrained exploration and questing areas. At what point exactly did Zelda, in particular post OoT-Zelda, become some sort of open world explore-fest with activities galore, rather than a large, mostly lifeless main field with a few hidden bits that you had to get through on Epona in order to get to the next *actual* area?

It may just be a personal thing, but I play these games for the story, the Zelda mythology, and the dungeons. Not for the random hidden cave in the left-hand corner of the map with the 100-rupee piece and the lone fairy. Skyward Sword having streamlined the main field, and not even by all that much is, imo, both a flawed complaint and no big loss.

That said, much of a Zelda fan as I am, it's completely brainless and the worst sort of fanboyism to come here and ***** about Yahtzee daring to have a different opinion. It's Yahtzee, he's never been a huge Nintendo fan and he's definitely never liked motion controls. What exactly were you expecting? It's like everyone who was ready to lynch the one reviewer who gave SS a 7.5/10 instead of a 10/10 like everyone else. Calm down. It's ok, really.

The thing is it manages to feel quite an open map despite this I spent a while running around and collecting the little tokens in each of the areas the other day and I was really enjoying myself.

Also despite what Yahtzee said there is a lot more to find in the sky than just Tesco's

It's true what you say Zelda has always been a central field with dungeons going off of that. Rather than a Skyrim esqe romp.

I would really love them to remake A link to the Past tbh I think that had a particulary well done world that was balanced between dungeons and above world map.

 

[floppylobster]

I remember when the term 'plot hole' was reserved for actual holes in the plot not just any old inconsistency. Kids these days... (coal, school, 12 miles, snow, etc...)

 

[LilithSlave]

And yet, it's worth attacking him. That just seems odd to me.

My voicing my disappointment in giving such a vile man another go.

Makes me feel better wasting the time viewing his filth.

How dare someone disagree with you....

Oh yes, disagreeing with someone is the same as saying "how dare they".

But it's certainly sad that someone gets money out of spewing consistently putrid and ridiculous wrong opinions about video games. Yahztee is wrong. Yahztee is almost always wrong. Yahtzhee makes the most petty, inane "criticisms" of video games since his inception as a review, and people take this person serious and give him money for his reviews.

Yahztee is one of the worst reviewers and critics I have ever come across in the video game industry. Possibly even worse than Adam Sessler. And Adam Sessler is a pathetically horrible part of the video game industry and community. They're like Bill o' Reilly, but about video games.

And funny how you, sadly, find this person worth writing a gigantic tl;dr post defending him on his continued inanity. How dare someone disagree with Yahtzee...

However, I like the flat "No they're not rehashed, and anyone who says otherwise is a...." argument.

You know, there's only so many times you half to repeat the rebuttal to the often ridiculous claim that Zelda is rehashed, since Zelda haters do it all the time. I don't even know why I'm giving you a response. Look at the several other arguments online that tear this argument to shreds. Search for the topic on these forums, google it.

It's like being asked to prove why evolution exists every single time some creationist comes in.

How about you explain how there's a problem with the motion control, eh? Lag problem with the motion control? What on earth?

 

[Gainrrom]

"It's worth remembering that all reviews are subjective personal opinions and if you personally enjoyed the game then they really shouldn't get to you... unless of course there's a despicable little niggling doubt in the back of your mind that maybe you're not having as much fun as you've convinced yourself you're having that doesn't go away no matter how many times you try to slap it down with a weak flannel of excuses [...]."
--Yahtzee, Mailbag Showdown (following his review, hated by insecure fanboys, of Super Smash Bros Brawl)

Now, I'll go back to playing Skyward Sword because I'm having fun with it.

 

[6SteW6]

I love how people are always praising Yahtzee's unfailing cynicism and objective views on video games until it's their game! and then the fanboy emerges, full of fanboyish rage!!

He's going to knock your games, it's what he's paid to do. Let's not take it too personally guys!

 

[Tmcmistress]

The thing is it manages to feel quite an open map despite this I spent a while running around and collecting the little tokens in each of the areas the other day and I was really enjoying myself.

Also despite what Yahtzee said there is a lot more to find in the sky than just Tesco's

It's true what you say Zelda has always been a central field with dungeons going off of that. Rather than a Skyrim esqe romp.

I would really love them to remake A link to the Past tbh I think that had a particulary well done world that was balanced between dungeons and above world map.

Yah, I got to the bamboo cutting mini-game and was like "This is fun", but then the guy tells me "Oh, you'd do better if you had a longer sword", and all I could think is "OR YOU COULD LET ME STAND CLOSER TO THE BAMBOO IN THE FIRST PLACE, A*****E" Really though, so far I'm pretty well pleased with SS. Twilight Princess remains my favorite, though.

 

[GrimHeaper]

Yahtzee should play it on hard mode.

 

[NerfedFalcon]

"Gee, maybe I was wrong about this Yahtzee fella I hate the guts of and find to be a bane of all gaming. Everyone seems to defend this intolerable person around here. Maybe he's come to his senses and sees The Legend of Zelda: Skyward Sword for the amazing game it really is and I'll gain some respect for him".

"Yahtzee proceeds to mutilate the greatest game of 2011 like an irredeemable..."

I feel sad for being a video gamer knowing that I share the fandom with people like Yahtzee. I'm never making the mistake of ever watching his videos or reading his materials again. It's an utter horrific waste of human life. I think I'd lose less brain cells watching Bill o' Reilly.

Not that such a video even deserves a rebuttal, but Skyward Sword is far from the "worst" Zelda game, Zelda games are not rehashed and anyone who says that makes their opinions look as valid as when someone pulls a Godwin's Law. Zelda games in general are amazing, not because of "blind fanboyism", but because they are. There are no problems with the motion control in this game, and all that seems to be Yahtzee's meaningless bias towards motion control.

It's worth remembering that all reviews are subjective personal opinions, and if you personally enjoy the game then they shouldn't really get to you. Unless of course there's a despicable little niggling doubt in the back of your mind, that maybe you're not having as much fun as you've convinced yourself you're having, which doesn't go away no matter how many times you try to slap it down with the wet flannel of weak excuses.

Also, allow me to address "meaningless bias": he's already stated that he feels that gaming technology already works the way it is, and unless you're going full Holodeck then having to move your own body around too much in a game is only going to make it less immersive. Honestly, I have to agree, especially since there's a lot of games for the Wii where not having to waggle to "melee attack" etc. would actually make the game much better. What's more, even with more accurate motion control, there's still the problem of bouncing off a wall or an enemy's armour: Link flinches back, but your arm keeps going.

Also, don't act like he only bashes Zelda. He bashes everyone. And in most cases he's not even bashing as much as you think he is:

Consider me a praiser by exception, in that everything I don't mention is perfectly fine.

If you really can't handle having your favourite game ever held under the crucible for any amount of time by anyone at all, it's time to disconnect your router, throw it in a river and keep obliviously playing your games in a way that means nobody's opinions can affect your experience.

 

[Gatx]

I was also wary of the lack of an "open-world" feel to the game. Then again I'm one of the people who actually didn't mind, and even sort of enjoyed the Great Sea in Windwaker.

 

[BishopofAges]

After reading a lot of replies and the like, restated arguements and inevitable ends, I feel I have to put forth my opinion (warning, subject to interpretation)

I love the living crap out of Skyward Sword, I took off with a standie from GameStop (because they let me) and now use it as a games shelf, and I have even shared the other two saves with my best friends to watch them play and either laugh at their antics or remember the cool stuff they find or how to kill stuff in fun ways.

I also liked the Yahtzee review of it, was quite funny and the only pester I have is that it could have prodded more at certain aspects, side quests, minor characters(GROOSE!), the fact that the Headmaster of the knight academy was perfectly cool with letting the lazy kid in class save his daughter, and by extention the world.

I still got quite a few laughs out of his perspective, which I did share with friends as we played much to their humor. I don't think it was a bad video, or video game. I still like Yahtzee's wedding-crash style of reviewing, and think that people who take him too seriously really ought to ponder why they feel this way as if it cheapens their gaming experience. He doesn't sit in your house ruining it for you while you play, does he? (this does not apply to the nameless faceless chums of his who he 'sometimes' plays with, sorry guys)

EDIT: By no means is this ment to bait or flame on anyone elses opinion of anything, just my opinion, subject to interpretation.