Zero Punctuation: Too Human

Slycne

Tank Ninja
Feb 19, 2006
3,422
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Thristle post=6.71155.721731 said:
for some reason i still cant watch the videos...
i tried with IE8B2/FF3.0.3nightly/chromium(nightly chrome) with flash 10 RC installed and i cant get any video
Try the suggestions listed here first, http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/help. If nothing helps then use the Contact Form to get in touch with tech.
 

Gohlar

New member
Sep 11, 2008
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lol look at the angry sheep.

I'm not even a Too Human fanboy, it's just funny when someone writes a review and doesn't even have a clue about how to play it. He said that theres a pause after every hit. That means he didn't even know to hold the stick down. Honestly, how stupid can you get?

Bandwagons are all the rage. Enjoy the ride.

EonEire post=6.71155.720844 said:
Gohlar post=6.71155.719670 said:
Muphin_Mann post=6.71155.719554 said:
It sucks that that game sucked. I wanted a good sci-fi based on norse mythology to bad. Good review tho.
It's not a review, it's a joke. Try the game.

I remember this site having a video about how games are getting too easy. Kind of funny that he cries at the slightest bit of difficulty. From his comments it's pretty clear he didn't even understand very basic control aspects. While entertaining, it's a pitiful review.

There's a reason many people in the industry are speaking out and defending this game. It's fun.
This game is by far the WORST thing I have played in a long time. And there is no point in throwing "not getting the combat" rubbish at me because I finished it out of sheer determination. There is nothing Innovative or new about that combat system infact I can tell you how easy it is to break it.


Right-Stick Forward X2--> (A) ---> Hold Right-Stick towards enemy---> Land and press Right-Button.

And this will kill any group of enemies (bar the ranged Dark Elf enemy)So what innovative about it? You sound like Denis Dyack you are saying that he didn't get the basic controls but failed to say how. There is nothing to get, that's why.
And yet he cried about how hard it was. That's my point. The review makes him sound like he's terrible at games. It's not the greatest game ever by any means. I was just pointing out at how clueless he was when playing it.

And btw, it was the WORST thing ever and you still finished it? Interesting.
 

yourkie1921

New member
Jul 24, 2008
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I'm not even a Too Human fanboy
yes you are
, it's just funny when someone writes a review and doesn't even have a clue about how to play it. He said that theres a pause after every hit. That means he didn't even know to hold the stick down. Honestly, how stupid can you get?
The point remains that after you hit an enemy it takes a brutal agonizing second to start going from one enemy to the next.
 

Gohlar

New member
Sep 11, 2008
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There's no delay at all going from one guy to another. You fly around like a pinball...but ok, I'm a fanboy because I don't blindly agree with some clueless review. Whatever.

Just trying to share actual facts, sorry to break up the "everything sucks" party.
 

yourkie1921

New member
Jul 24, 2008
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You fly around like a pinball.
when you're moving that is. I admit, the speed at which baldur moves when flying from place to place is awesome, but when I played the game I noticed it took more time to start moving than to get from place to place. Also, if he moves so fast why does he walk around at the speed of a snail?
I'm a fanboy because I don't blindly agree with some clueless review. Whatever.
NO, I've played the game before yahtzee did and I agree with everything he said.
 

bmike210

New member
Sep 7, 2008
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"How persistent it is, this demand that our gods be perfect. The Greeks were much more reasonable about such things."
 

j_meister

New member
Jul 20, 2008
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Well done Yahtzee, it feels like the old you is back and shaking his thang. That's right: I said 'thang'.
This is the breath of fresh air you needed. A truely awful attempt at a game that needed you to slate it.
And slate it you did! You made slating into an artform once again, you sexy, sexy man.
Keep searching for rubbish like Too Human, and keep tearing them to shreds in your video reviews. That's your winning formula.
 

Magnetic2

New member
Mar 18, 2008
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Hm, no mention of the graphics, too uninterested to look up screen shots.

Waiting for when the heavy weights of the gaming industry start releasing their opuses maximas
into the fray for some real fun from Yahtzee. A barbecue of giants we will have.
 

nm_the_bollocks

New member
Sep 12, 2008
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I think that this game is great and that yahtzee is a bitter, stupid, hateorade drinker.

Also, does anyone know where the video is that contains the joke about the Simpsons jumping the shark, killing the shark, eating the shark, shitting out the shark, and then jumping the shit?
It might not be a Zero Punctuation video.

Any help would be much appreciated!
 

yourkie1921

New member
Jul 24, 2008
305
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Magnetic2 post=6.71155.722585 said:
Hm, no mention of the graphics, too uninterested to look up screen shots.
I don't think Yahtzee mentions graphics unless they're so bad they make your eyes bleed or as good crysis.
 

peterwolfe

New member
Aug 2, 2008
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i liked this review (NOT a joke; review). i don't own this game, and after playing about ten minutes of my friends copy, i see why. the controls reminded me too much of that old game for the xbox, ghosts and goblins (or something like that). using the second analog stick to attack was retarded then and it's retarded now. i honestly didn't even play the full ten minutes, maybe 4-7, and once i died and my friend told me how long the cut scene was, i turned it off and popped in gears of war (we then played co-op for hours to try to get the taste of shitty game out of our mouths).
 

sotanaht1

New member
Sep 12, 2008
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Garfgarog post=6.71155.720640 said:
sotanaht1 post=6.71155.719854 said:
I want to know that myself. He could be using them because he loves them or because he finds them overrated and wants to poke fun at them every time he gets a chance.
You can't seriously have ever not thought 'Baldur's Gate' to yourself as you play the game and hear his name.
Sure, I thought that as soon as I heard the name, though I have not played too human yet, but he has used the game in at least three reviews (so I have heard, don't remember the third), and at least one, if not both of the other times it he could have used any of a great deal of games.

I just want to know what the funniest game reviewer on the web, and one with whom I have not found myself disagreeing with often at all, thinks about the game I have the quite possibly the strongest opinion of (I am not currently saying what that opinion is, as that could color any response)
 

maximumpwnage69

New member
Sep 13, 2008
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Listen I'm not a fan boy or one of the millions of mindless sheep that buy games on hype alone and I will have to admit that all of the points made are valid if a little exaggerated. However, the fact is boys and girls the game is a lot of fun. I know the camera is awkward the control scheme is "unique" and the story leaves you with questions about the conflict at hand. Yet even with this once you master the controls/camera, starting killing swarms of enemies, while co-oping and talking trash talking with a buddy you will look up and realize "hey i'm having fun?" Yes a game with such resounding technical issues and a tirade of horrid reviews is actually fun. Isn't that why we play games? You know to have fun? I hate the fact that most games are all about what crazy new graphics engine is doing the character models or how each blade of grass has its own individual physics engine. Its crazy and I think we should all step back and take a breath to realize when a game is fun then it has accomplished its ultimate goal in entertaining its audience.
 

Sillyiggy

New member
Jun 12, 2008
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cutekittenkyti post=6.71155.715351 said:
I found it very ironic and funny that EA games
the one that yahtzee always criticizes has this HUGE MASSIVE FIVE MINUTE trailer at the end of his video, and a little blurb before it as well.
Also the escapist is skinned up for eve...
(or either some really big adds)
just a little too perfect in the irony department for me
Ssssh!! EA will hear you and pull their ads away! We want Escapist getting lots of muniez so they will keep amusing us so!
 

yourkie1921

New member
Jul 24, 2008
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And yet he cried about how hard it was. That's my point. The review makes him sound like he's terrible at games. It's not the greatest game ever by any means. I was just pointing out at how clueless he was when playing it.
No, he ranted about how the death system sucks. And just because the combat CAN be broken and made easy if you know how doesn't make the game hard if you don't. and, you're still a fanboy. And, "yahtzee's bad at games" not a valid arguement. And saying someone "cried" as a synonym for whining or saying someone's whining when they're not should be punishable by death.
 

Heddon

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Sep 13, 2008
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You said "it stinks of the auteur". I think you meant to say "it is bad". Alfred Hitchcock was really good. He was also an auteur. Then there are other auteurs who were bad. Being an auteur isn't in and of itself bad.