Zero Punctuation: Turok

cutekittenkyti

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Dec 12, 2007
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Oh and to everyone out there, if you didnt understand the "I'm not offended by recent de-rez video srsly" the basic sum up is, they got someone to wear a fedora, act drunk scream yahtzee! and then run into a nearby forest while taking off their clothes.

And then they said he'd make another awesome review, which he did

I LOVE the genre reviews, and this one was particuarly funny

(LMAO HEALTH BAR WITH LAMP SHADE ON HEAD) (SIGUNEY WEAVER = BAD MALE HAIRDO)

ok im done noaw
 

cutekittenkyti

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Dec 12, 2007
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oh and I'm a femal, but idk if I'm classified as a gamer, prolly not cause I don't completely own any gaming consoles, and I only play certain types of games.
 

cutekittenkyti

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Dec 12, 2007
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I halfway own a gamecube controller o_O
(Metroid prime FTW !!)

(srsly how much am I going to spam this forum, lol)

(( I bet no one reads dis))
 

Colodomoko

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Feb 22, 2008
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Just to be clear(I replied to these forums earlier BTW)I liked the games intense action whenever I jump into it. I can't even get pass the giant eel boss(It is so damn ugly!). Also unless you had experience playing online for a while it is magor bull to say you beat it in one day.

P.S.- Nice to see they are still making dinosaur games out there.
 

ClassicThunder

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Dec 28, 2007
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Indigo_Dingo said:
Then I argue that you are a chimp. All of the issues raised there have ruined certain FPS's for me, but when removed, or reversed (i.e. the gaming masterpeice that is Resistance : Fall of Man) the game itself is fantastic from head to foot. If the observed things are making FPS's less fun, then obviously Fps's are not getting better and better, but worse and worse.
Personal opinion only held by you and a few others. Have fun whining and reminiscing.
 

sfried

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Dec 20, 2007
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All I can say is "Well said, Yahtzee! It's about time somebody stood up for the good ol' days when PC fps weren't simply about running and gunning from point X to Y and that there was an astounding amount of divesity in them.", especially since the G4 people now watch your program,

Unfortunately, as long as Ubisoft continues to crank out Rainbow 6 Vegas sequels (since R6 officially went the way of the dodo ever since their move to the Unreal engine, and hence more pop-and-shoot gunbattles rather than real covert tactical planning and precision), and the more the industry supports this kind of uniformity because "it's more accessible" to the ironically "hardcore" crowd, I believe FPSs will continue to become stagnated and tarnished by the same people who thought that turning the original Halo from a tactical-team based pseudo-rts with squadbased mechanics to an utterly uninspired singleplayer campain focused on some heroics of an average superspacemarine, I think the videogame FPS industry as a whole is bound for shittyness.

Fortunately, as you say, there's always Valve and mods.
 

ZippyDSMlee

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Sep 1, 2007
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Badmagic said:
I wish people in the industry at the moment would watch this episode in particular and be forced to pay attention, agreed with everything said with a wry smile on my face due to the style intrinsic to the author.

I would say my current pet peeve has to go to the grenades splash damage issue or the lack of as the case may be, it's farcical in any fps I played from recent memory, they are little more than an annoyance like roving midges in the height of summer.

I have to say I played HALO 1 on the PC when it came out and enjoyed it for what it was but I couldn't care less about #2 & #3 and the dumbing down of all types of game is slowly driving me insane.

I have heard people say that they aren't dumbing down games; my response would be yes they are, unless I'm gaining new intelligence and insight which I know is not physically possible at my current age and has not been for many years.

From what I have seen the author has no great affection for many RPG's but that's one of the areas that's getting affected the worst from my perspective, any developer that's producing them seems intent on trying to capture the fps market by castrating what should be rpg's and slapping on some fps game play elements.

So far in my personal option all these games managed to do was produce an experience with not enough fps to satisfy those customers they wanted to get the attention of and severely limit the rpg elements to alienate those customers too.

Argh, it's starting to grate again, I better stop now before I start ranting.
True i loved Halo 1 put 2 and 3 are just sad.

twilight_dweller said:
Call me ignorant, but why are we talking about Halo 3 in a Turok based thread? Whatever.

In any case, I just played Turok on my friend's 360. And all the issues Yahtzee talked about were there. And it really screamed "Generic!"
Because the evolution of Halo and its effect on FPSs is a issue to all FPSs and we are talking about FPSs as much as Turok, so please don't hate us for picking on Halo.

Indigo_Dingo
.....I don't see a "drunken on the rail shooter" out doing Unreal,pysco circus,undying,duke 3d or even Blood any time soon.....
 

edinflames

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Dec 21, 2007
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Uszi said:
I would say, Yahtzee, if you want FPS with a sense of humor, then play the Postal Series, which features such hilarious bits as pissing on yourself to put yourself out when you catch fire.
Yes, Postal 2 while possibly the sickest game I have ever played (though the Devs argue it is only a sick as you make it - the meanest way to kill someone I discovered was to tazer them to the floor, and while they lie twitching and defecating themselves pour gasoline on said victim, throw on the match, piss on them to put the blaze out after their skin turns crispy, then behead the poor sod with a spade. Kicking the severed head out of the nearest window and into the streets is optional) made me laugh more than any other FPS I've ever played. The inclusion of Osama Bin Laden in the post-9/11 patch was a masterstroke.
 

Firia

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Sep 17, 2007
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Someone else said it, I will echo it. :) I like "Resistnaces'" take on Health Meters. It was segmented into four 25% portions. You would regen only up to the nearest 25th. 100%, 75%, 50%, etc etc. It was kinda like health meters, but it had regen effects. It wasn't the same as health meters, but more like the happy love child of Health Meters and Regeneration in FPS's today. :)

I'm not sad to see health meters go, and I'm not altogether upset at regenerating health in the modern FPS. I will be pleased if we even out on Fall of Mans' take on health meters. ;)

(I still play alot of CS:S, where it's health meter-rific, and the only form of a health kit is in the form of a Respawn. ;) )
 

shadow1138

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Mar 20, 2008
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Godot said:
shadow1138 said:
The little brat actually shut her Sepiroth kissing mouth up!
Nice try, but there is no such thing as Girl Gamers.

That's the stupidest thing about it-she's not even a gamer she just saw the movies and games frome some ff freaks and decided they're the greatest things ever! Can you believe it ?
 

Vortigar

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Nov 8, 2007
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Indigo_Dingo:
Sheesh, did one of Resistance's designers steal your teddy?
I was just talking about the health meter!

Something no FPS has copied so far, which is odd, because they are on to something with that segmented regenerating health bar if you ask me. If you make a mistake in a level you do get penalized for it later, unlike the 100% regenerating bar, which allows you to just run amok and see how far it gets you before even having to consider employing any kind of tactics at all (as long as you keep half an eye on an exit strategy).

I think the 100% health regeneration by sucking your thumb in the corner thing was invented to make life easier for programmers. You don't have to distribute health packets across a level anymore, and fear you've placed too few or too many. You can just assume the protagonist has full health at all times and build your enemy encounters around that.

ps.
They could have a patent on that healthbar though, in which case it isn't that odd.

pps.
Thank you Firia.
 

bfb8688

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Jan 17, 2008
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He is dead on about Aliens. Even COD4 has Aliens references! In the first level, where you are on the ship, right before you breach the door one of your fellow soldiers says, "I like to keep this handy for close encounters." Gee...where have I heard that before? Also, later in that level as the ship is going under one of your teammates says, "We are LEAVING!" Another direct reference to Aliens. Of course, I love every second of it :)
 

Joeshie

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Oct 9, 2007
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ClassicThunder said:
Personal opinion only held by you and a few others. Have fun whining and reminiscing.
And yours isn't a personal opinion? Nice try there kid.

Some parts of FPS have improved and some parts have worsened. Good luck trying to find the diversity and uniqueness in FPS today that was present many years ago.
 

NSiky

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Nov 1, 2007
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I agreed on most points except health metres. UIs need to be kept clear to keep a game feeling cinematic.