Zero Punctuation: Yahtzee Goes to GDC

[Spitz]

I personally disagree with Yahtzee's assumptions on Guitar Hero and Rock Band. Oh sure, Guitar Hero III : Legends of Rock is a kick in the soft dangly bits for all concerned, but before that, the games (1, 2 and 80's) supposedley drummed up more business for Guitar teaches and sales of real Gibsons, Yamaha's and all other makers of the instant coolness machine than they'd been seeing in years, as well as increasing the number of Headbangers (My cousin and one of my friends among them). And as for Rock Band, half of the game (Vocals and Drums) require actual talent in order to not suck completely at them, and the guitar and base are getting closer to the real deal with the addition of 5 new buttons.

Guitar and BASS are getting closer to the real deal? I have been playing guitar for 15 years or so and I'm pretty sure a smaller plastic version of a guitar with buttons for frets, NO MATTER HOW MANY BUTTONS will never be "closer to the real deal." Until the day I can plug in my real guitar to my PS9 or Xbox1080xxx, it will never be like the real deal.

The Rock Band guitar is a piece of trash and the solo buttons were a complete waste of someone's brain power and the companies development time.

Oh and the review was good, I didn't think it was his best by at all. He was funny and definitely spoke - I think - at times faster then usual. It's really amazing how many people are getting upset about the censorship... but are we really surprised?... Na..

 

[Digikid]

If you call your opinion (i.e. that 360 is better than Ps3) fact, then you are, by very definition, wrong.

Listen to yourself, Indigo Dingo. You're no better.

Thanks.

 

[kingflab]

Heh, I need to apologise to loads of people. I keep clicking Report instead of Quote, I've done it like 6 times now (honestly, I'm used to clicking Quote on the left)

At the end of the day, Yahtzee is a professional writer, not a Pop-star. If he's given an offer to make a presentation which would have to be censored so as not to break GDC rules and regulations - then thats entirely up to him to choose. They got him to pop a long and give a ranting raving presentation, and he did just that - to call it Kid Friendly is like criticizing Space Odessy for not having hard-core nudity. I would much rather have a Yahtzee presentation at GDC with bleeping than no Yahtzee presentation at GDC at all.

 

[fundude365]

Too true on Duke Nukem forever... I'm pretty certain I'd heard aboot it pre-1998... And he definately doesn't measure up to magical hand that shoots Bees. (I'm not certain why I'm posting now... wil anyone take any notice?)

 

[Lan_Di]

I must say, I'm disappointed that Yahtzee willfully missed his opportunity to smack the game developers around a little bit. Here is a man clearly upset with the state of the industry (as evidenced by every review of his ever except for Portal) who had an opportunity to tell game developers to their faces to fix any of the problems he frequently rants about in his reviews. There was no mention of the constant milking of sequels, the emphasis on multiplayer content, writing that would be inexcusable in a high school paper, and the saturation of the market by first person shooters (or action games in general).

This didn't even need to be done in a mean-spirited way like his normal reviews (see Stephen Colbert at the White House) but considering Yahtzee has never shied away from his opinions as a "games are art fagmasexual" it was bizarre to see him licking the balls of Duke Nukem and reiterating his Guitar Hero review. The only part that seemed even vaguely scathing was his tearing up of Bioshock's protagonist and even that ended with him basically excusing most games for not having real characters. It just seemed to go against everything he's been saying in his reviews; I mean, the PS3 is a decent competitor because of Folklore? He seemed to take a more casual, idealistic view of the industry when his utter contempt for it is the only thing that separates him from every other game reviewer ever in life.

 

[VeryOblivious]

If you call your opinion (i.e. that 360 is better than Ps3) fact, then you are, by very definition, wrong.

Listen to yourself, Indigo Dingo. You're no better.

Thanks.

I don't get this. He's saying that both of you are idiots and you say thanks... just LOL
Either way, u2rockbaby, he's not wrong nor he's like the idiot above. JUst read that very simple sentence again.

 

[Sparkly-elf]

Hahah I just love his sence or humour. Beligerent to a point of rambling eloquence!

Very good, and I'm glad to see he has the recognition he deserves for his style of videos and really bitingly witful one-liners. Congrats to him.

 

[Wyatt]

You (and a number of other posters) seem to have taken this rather hard, but if the guy who was "censored" (if he didn't choose to have the bleeps in the first place) isn't getting bent out of shape, why should everyone else?
P.S.: I'm not trying to hate on you specifically, Wyatt. I've read your other posts and I cracked up when you nailed the "kiddy diddler." No hard feelings?

none taken, honist differences of opinion are what drives the world. the more so when they are presented with obvious though put behind them.

let me say though that the fact that yahtzee hasent commented on this topic changes nothing, even if yahtzee himself came here and annouced that he was 100% ok with the censorship it still wouldnt change the basic issues i (and others) have with it.

censorship is bad, ill admit there MAY be times on the corse of life and death situations that censorship might be needed, but even in that event it should be approached with a wary tread and each instiance should be weighed with the gravest care. the comment that was made that censorship in this context isnt "isn't some massive blow to freedoms or values" is the EXACT attitude that allows the removial of those freedoms in the first place.

at NO time should a person right to freedom of expression be shrugged off as 'no big deal'. perhaps the charges that im making more out of this than i should be do have a foundation of truth, granted this isnt a life or death situation, but on the other hand if we establish the line of what is and what isnt acceptable in reguards to censorship too lightly, if we shrug of even small instiances of it as 'no big deal' that sets a pressident for 'bigger' issues being decided under the same framework.

ohh yeah and there is also the point that if good men say nothing then evil wins by default. if you accept censorship with out a valid life or death reason then you are just letting the same bastards that want too ban video games totaly win by default. its a very very small step from censoring a clip like yahtzees 'for the children' and baning video games with guns/sex/drugs/racism/what-have-you .......... 'for the children'. and if video game players ACT like children and say its ok of 'mamma and pappa at the GDC censor what we are allowed to hear' then the next step is a ban on your GAMES not just people that talk about them.

 

[pinkgothic]

im just speaking up because page after page of posts reflected an opinion i agreed with and then some moron got up on their bandwaggon and started the 'cant we all just get along' happy horseshit and calling people idiots because they had the nerve to make a post saying they hated the censorship.

I challenge you to tell me where I called anyone an idiot.

 

[kingflab]

You (and a number of other posters) seem to have taken this rather hard, but if the guy who was "censored" (if he didn't choose to have the bleeps in the first place) isn't getting bent out of shape, why should everyone else?
P.S.: I'm not trying to hate on you specifically, Wyatt. I've read your other posts and I cracked up when you nailed the "kiddy diddler." No hard feelings?

none taken, honist differences of opinion are what drives the world. the more so when they are presented with obvious though put behind them.

let me say though that the fact that yahtzee hasent commented on this topic changes nothing, even if yahtzee himself came here and annouced that he was 100% ok with the censorship it still wouldnt change the basic issues i (and others) have with it.

censorship is bad, ill admit there MAY be times on the corse of life and death situations that censorship might be needed, but even in that event it should be approached with a wary tread and each instiance should be weighed with the gravest care. the comment that was made that censorship in this context isnt "isn't some massive blow to freedoms or values" is the EXACT attitude that allows the removial of those freedoms in the first place.

at NO time should a person right to freedom of expression be shrugged off as 'no big deal'. perhaps the charges that im making more out of this than i should be do have a foundation of truth, granted this isnt a life or death situation, but on the other hand if we establish the line of what is and what isnt acceptable in reguards to censorship too lightly, if we shrug of even small instiances of it as 'no big deal' that sets a pressident for 'bigger' issues being decided under the same framework.

ohh yeah and there is also the point that if good men say nothing then evil wins by default. if you accept censorship with out a valid life or death reason then you are just letting the same bastards that want too ban video games totaly win by default. its a very very small step from censoring a clip like yahtzees 'for the children' and baning video games with guns/sex/drugs/racism/what-have-you .......... 'for the children'. and if video game players ACT like children and say its ok of 'mamma and pappa at the GDC censor what we are allowed to hear' then the next step is a ban on your GAMES not just people that talk about them.

I'm sorry, but you're completely talking out your arse. This is not in any way Censorship of Freedom of Speech, to suggest that idea is insulting to the principle itself, Philosopher's and Political idealists haven't spent the last 3000 years trying to create values such as Freedom of Speech, only to have it mocked as some sort of excuse to swear and curse freely infront of any audience the user deems fit. Freedom of speech revolves around opinions and ideas, not curse words. Professionalism needs to be maintained, rules and regulations have to exist, alright so it means we cant run around shouting "fuck shit and wank" in an office block, but it all boils down to appropiate use.

My concerns of freedom of speech lay within Government limitations upon criticism on religion/government and organisation. Recently here in the UK a law against 'religios hate speech' was implemented... which is ridiculous, it blocks public ridicule of religion in most forms - including satirical. That I have a major problem with. People should have every right to state an opinion; but that doesn't mean people should be freely allowed to offend - a world without comments like "ragheads are shit" is a better place to be.

But that is totally irrelevent. Yahtzee hasn't been told he cant swear, he's been told he can't swear in a presentation for a specific audience - the GDC has guidelines, if it wants to exist it has to stick to them. There is a massive massive MASSIVE difference between censorship of curse words for conferences than there is in political censorship. Its not acceptable for explicit or violent content to be shown on daytime TV - so whats the major difference with a professional conference?

Yahtzee has had no rights taken away from him, no laws have been forced, he's had to bleep swear words at a conference run by a company who will probably be paying HIM for the presentation - its up to them to choose if they want the content shown at GDC to have a 18/16/15/12 Age rating. Swearing can be offensive to many people, and people are warned in advanced if adult content will be shown - we have this for televsion, papers, video-games, DVD's - GDC is no different. If its bosses said they want that place to be acceptable for a 15+ audience, then every presentation at that conference has to adhere. I'd be very worried if the BBC suddenly changed its motto to "Fuckin Harcore!"

 

[Nighth@wk]

for the last time i hope, the problem with censoring yahtzee in the context of the GDC is about the fact that...
...and that the GDC had to take steps to get him under control.

i totally agree with you.....

I must say, I'm disappointed that Yahtzee willfully missed his opportunity to smack the game developers around a little bit....
....He seemed to take a more casual, idealistic view of the industry when his utter contempt for it is the only thing that separates him from every other game reviewer ever in life.

sad, but true....
(sry for shortening the quotes.... prevents overly long posts)


usually i don't surf around the internet much because imo it's a waste of time and i'm still pretending to have a life. yahtzee however changed that. visiting one side weekly can't quite be considered surfing, but for me it's most likely as good as it can get.....
probably understandable that a censored review was quite a shock.... luckily however it seems that the last review was a one-off, luckily for my ears that is..... i don't know how much influence this one had on yhatzee's popularity, if it had any.... the only positive thing is, it proves once again that TV sucks.... ^^

i almost believed the censorship was intended by escapistmagazine to be implemented from now on.... that would've been truly devastating.... i'm definitely happy as hell that this wasn't the case..... but perhaps i'm not observant enough to have noticed it from the start.....

now a few words to his holiness yahtzee himself
95% agree
05% discussible
sadly though we'll probably never get to have a little talk because you're too busy deleting the shiayit ppl send you... XD
regards so far

 

[DarthTirith]

Not the best video, but still pretty funny. I liked the DNF bit at least. Keep up the good work. Also big laughs at this thread.. You people really care about the beeping? Of course it was beeped out, it was made for GDC not this site. Its not going to be a normal thing. Christ..

 

[Logie--bear]

This is the first ZP review i have actually failed to laugh at...it just was not funny, it didnt cover any new ground, and was rather like one of those very annoying re-cap episodes you find in just about every single fucking science fiction series.

Agreed. I was expecting something absolutely Fandabbybabulous to make the entire world worship yahtzee. This wasn't it.

Also, What is with everyone making analogies and simile's in their comments? Only Yahtzee can do it well and it makes you sound stupid and wannabe.

 

[Nemra]

lol agreed

 

[Bombader]

Well the GDC I'm sure he didn't want to alienate new viewers with new stuff and inside jokes, and really the censorship is hardly noticeable as it was few and not done very well (in fact he may have done it himself). I kinda wonder if some of you watched it 2 or 3 times before you post here sometimes heh.

It was funny the first time I watched it, so it had some magic to it, just not enough to watch for an entire week.

If you want something to watch for weeks, youtube is good for that, reviews are supposed to be watch-once endevers anyway, Yahtzee just does it in a different way.

 

[Wyatt]

I'm sorry, but you're completely talking out your arse....... yadda yadda yadda

that whole reply of yours boils down to this

its ok for people to tell other people how they can express themselves, unless its the government doing it then we should revolt and shoot all the bastards. or words to that effect.

my main point here has been that yahtzee wasnt self censored, he wasnt told to create a work without cussing, he produced a work and the GDC saw fit to ruin it by censorship.

dont know what part of this you cant get. i KNOW there are rules that govern TV content, i KNOW that companys have a 'right' to controll content in their venues, i KNOW that not everyone is comfortable with cussing, i know ALL of this, and ALL of that misses the point.

the POINT is and what YOU should KNOW by now is that there was NO need for censorship when at all when a simple statment to yahtzee before he produced his work would have allowed him to creat that work without the need for censorship at all. INSTEAD they allowed him to produce his work then THEY censored it.

THEY changed HIS work instead of simply telling him that HE needed to produce something they could live with.

the choice was simple.

choice one: the GDC comes to yahtzee and says, we would like you to produce something for our show but due to the nature of the venue we need for you not to use cuss words.

choice two: the GDC comes to yahtzee and says, we would like you to produce something for our show since your pretty popular and funny and we just love your work.
after its done they slap giant ass beeps every 10 words in the most moronic way possable so it makes not only them look retarded but yahtzee too.


wich choice would you support? ill give a very loose nod at choice one myself,though im not all that keen on censorship by pressure either meaning not direct censorship but rather censorship that is self imposed by the creater in order to get access to certian venues,(example here in the States) im not real happy that video games companys dont put nudity or sex in a game where its called for (or otherwise edit it out) because wal-mart wont sell an AO game.

choice two, only a fool would defend. and in this case NO ONE benifited, the censorship makes the GDC look like Idiots, it makes Yahtzee look like a foul mouth gamer moron, and the people it was ment to 'protect', "the children" and people whos ears will explode at the use of the work dick, were not protected because its very clear what he was saying.

so i ask you few that are still insisting on defending this censorship , why? when no one wins not even the 'innocent children' why defend it? by God i was told by someone that was AT the GDC when this clip was shown that he over heard a 5 year old boy ask his father what "jerk off" ment, clearly that kid and most likley his father will both be scard for life and will never be able to look one another in the eye again as long as they live so as you can see the censorship not only didnt do its intended job, all it DID do was draw attention to an expression that "innocent child" would most likley wouldnt even have noticed if he hadnt had that screaming BEEP to highlight it for him.

common over to the real worlds side and just call em censoring morons like the rest of us and let the parents of those 'innocent children' do what my dad did and tell em to 'shut the hell up before i backhand you, and go get me another beer while your at it'

 

[Seano95]

24/2/08: Back in Black

That's right, spunk guzzlers, I'm back from GDC having shook my hand raw and have finally plowed through the big piles of email I specifically told you not to send me. Incidentally I deleted without reading all the ones that complained about the censor beeping in my GDC shorts. No, the reviews aren't going to be regularly bleeped now, shut up. They were put in there at the request of the GDC people and I deliberately made it clear what the word being bleeped out was. Personally I feel a censor bleep can have greater comedy value than a swear word on it's own so I was all for it.

How the hell did they make the videos 'unwatchable', as one viewer put it? Do you have some kind of chip in your brain that deactivates all your senses whenever you hear a high-frequency noise? Christ, you people are freaks.

Quoted from Yhatzee's site.

 

[Sevenine]

Wish it would've been a bit longer, but still, another good ZP. Thanks for the laughs again Yahtzee

Kind of sad to see so many people here whining out essays about a few bleeps..

 

[Hastur]

What's up with the fucking beeps? Sounds as if it was censored by the BBC. Ass or ***** is fine, but twat or bullocks is not?

 

[Wyatt]

24/2/08: Back in Black

That's right, spunk guzzlers, I'm back from GDC having shook my hand raw and have finally plowed through the big piles of email I specifically told you not to send me. Incidentally I deleted without reading all the ones that complained about the censor beeping in my GDC shorts. No, the reviews aren't going to be regularly bleeped now, shut up. They were put in there at the request of the GDC people and I deliberately made it clear what the word being bleeped out was. Personally I feel a censor bleep can have greater comedy value than a swear word on it's own so I was all for it.

How the hell did they make the videos 'unwatchable', as one viewer put it? Do you have some kind of chip in your brain that deactivates all your senses whenever you hear a high-frequency noise? Christ, you people are freaks.

how can you not love that man?