Do you believe in love?

[aei_haruko]

love is much to complex a thing to be referred to in this way.

it could be parental love of a child, it could be love of a brother, it could be love of an ideal, it could be love of a partner. I'd say i do believe in love, just because people have bad realationships, doesn't mean all realationships are bad, or that ove doesn't exist. Heck, I've dated my girlfriend for such a long time, and I have to sy even though she lives so far away, and even though I had to keep it a secret for almost 2 years, I'd never give it up.

 

[House_Vet]

In feeling love you feel like this:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EKmYlnQv_dg

And like this:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TJ6Mzvh3XCc&feature=fvst

All at once. I'm there. It's wonderful... and I don't ever want it to end. I've heard it said that Love isn't a feeling, it's a series of actions. Love isn't the feeling - that comes and goes, people get cross or whatever, but carrying on, acting with all the feeling of someone who's just been hit by it - that's love. If you'll do whatever it takes, for however long it takes for somebody, that's love. In the same way, the Christian sense of loving your neighbour isn't a feeling, it's an act.

 

[zehydra]

I've had both crushes, and love.

Since I'm personally aware of the difference, I would have to say that yes, it does exist. Unfortunately, it's difficult to describe, as it's largely a difference in the volatility of emotions, if that makes sense.

 

[Genericjim101]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bfdt7Bd_urg listen to this and tell me if you believe in love "Never never gonna give you up". The second "never" makes a huge difference. Yes you got Barry White roll'd

 

[Smurf McSmurfington]

From your definition, the latter.
Basically, "love" is nothing more than an overflow of oxytocin and a few other chemicals in our brains. Our culture's overly romanticised view of "love", however, does not exist in real life. By which I mean "true love" as people call it.
In every shape and form, both real and made up, I find it to be pointless. Completely and utterly pointless.

That's sounds like the classic mantra of the hurt. What did she do?

Why do people always assume that opinions such as these come from personal reasons?
I haven't been hurt in such a way by anyone. From an objective view from the perspective of an individual it has no real point, though in the grand scheme of things it sort of does have a purpose, to keep people breeding and keeping humanity in existance.
Subjectively, I see literally no appeal in that, doing my part to keep humanity alive and wasting my life by living for someone else. I find it uninteresting and therefore unappealing.
And objectively pointless from the perspective of the individual, 'cause the only thing it can do is reduce the quality of life, though one doesn't immediately realise that, 'cause most people lose all objectivity when "love" comes into play.

Also, long-term "love" is attachment not what people actually call love.

 

[DannyJBeckett]

"(Singing) I believe in a thing called love,

(Affecting a voice like I caught my testicles in a vice) Justtakeitfromtherhythmofmyheart!"


Seriously though, yeas, I believe love exists in some form or another.

 

[IkeGreil29]

I've been in love. I know what it's like. I do believe in it. I just think its rare that two people share it or that two people who actually love each other meet and get into a relationship. I also believe in love in the sense of loving your friends.

 

[House_Vet]

Why do people always assume that opinions such as these come from personal reasons?
I haven't been hurt in such a way by anyone. From an objective view it has no real meaning, though it sort of does have a purpose, to keep people breeding and keeping humanity alive.
Subjectively, I see literally no appeal in that, completely and utterly uninteresting and therefore pointless.

Also, long-term "love" is attachment not what people actually call love.

I sincerely hope that you shortly find yourself to be as wrong as it is possible to be. Sure, Oxytocin is a highly effective 'bonding' hormone, but just because Picasso painted Guernica with a brush it doesn't mean he didn't transcend what it means to 'paint a picture'. Just because our thoughts are the summation of millions of action potentials it doesn't make them meaningless. Nothing has any 'meaning' from a truly objective view, but you aren't objective, and neither am I, so frankly, who gives a damn? Not me m'dear.

 

[sheah1]

I believe in love, but not love at first sight. Love is something that has to be earned.

It is something one must cherish and constantly fight for. Like happiness it is something that must be defended.

So yeah. Love at first sight is nothing more than mere infatuation.

You sir, are a gentleman poet. With an excellent moustache.

 

[Kiwilove]

I think I am capable of love. I assume I am not unique. It took me a while to recognize that I was worthy of love, but that is another discussion.

 

[Hip Priest]

'Love' is a mass of clichés, perpetuated by bad pop records and insipid Rom-Coms. That, however, does not mean love does not exist; it's just that it is more complex than the concept we've been sold.

 

[Kryzantine]

There's definitely true love out there. There are some people that are simply worth defending with your life.

I don't know of true love that exists in the form of a marriage. The thing about relationships in our modern age, is that they end. They end in some way or another, and the love mostly dies.

I don't have a traditional girlfriend. I'm not the kind of person that goes around dating people. But I have charges, I have people who I love and who return that love to me, people that aren't tied to me by family. My oldest friend is such an example - the two of us go way back, and she's like the most adorable person I have ever met. We both love each other, just not like a boyfriend / girlfriend way. There's no sex. There's no vigourous making out. I mean, we embrace each other and occasionally kiss, but it's more of an older brother / younger sister kind of thing. My family couldn't care for me and even had to throw me away sometimes, so she fills that role for me, and I think I fill that role for her. Another friend is kind of the same thing, I'm the older brother she never had, but less pronounced, she hasn't been around as long, and there's not as much passion there, but there is genuine care and love there.

I don't know if I'll ever meet somebody who I love in the kind of way most people refer to love. I don't know if I even want that, as long as I'm with one of these family-I-never-had people.

 

[Dags90]

I think you fail to realise that love is only a feeling.

I'm quite sure that it's More Than A Feeling.

 

[Victorique]

What if I love you all?

 

[Thumper17]

Love exists in the form of Chemicals Reactions and in the form of CHER!!!!!

I believe in it, but I feel the only way to get my feelings across is with some rawk.

I think you fail to realise that love is only a feeling.

I think Huey can answer this best. "It's more then a feelin'.."

 

[Okamipsychonaut]

When people first get in lust with each other, the brain bombs you with dopamine...the chemical that gives you a sense of reward. This makes you say irrational statements such as " I will love you forever" or " I will never hurt you" or "You are my soul mate". This dopamine bombing goes on for an average of three years....an evolutionary tactic to keep a couple bonded for the amount of time it would take for them to give birth to and wean a child. This dopamine bombing can be akin to insanity and involve obsession, stalking, extreme jealousy, ect...all irrational tactics meant to do all sorts of things like keep other guys away from your girl or girls away from your guy or just plain psycho for no reason at all. After this three year average...and considering that a couple got together for reasons other than pure physical attraction.....the couple's "love" can maintain if each person has a healthy release of Oxytocin...the affection chemical...which women get bombed with when they first give birth, in order for them to bond with their offspring. It is also released during breastfeeding. That said...people get oxytocin releases around friends or siblings...not just babies and lovers.

Additionally, the well known psychologist CG Jung showed in one of his books that there is evidence that few people have any relationship to their inner workings of the mind and this is seen in the way people meet and fall in love, projecting an ideal or "soul image" on someone who in later days, months or years fantastically fails to fill the mold of this idealized box of doll parts.

That our feelings and experiences of falling in love might be dictated by evolution or brain chemicals does not take away from how people individually experience reality. Most people are way too subtle and nuanced and full of organized chaos to say that our feelings are just releases of chemicals urging us to procreate.

 

[Naeo]

It's corny and it's cliche, but it's true: you will know when you are truly in love, and until then, you don't really know what it is. It's a different thing for each person. For me, it was an intense romantic connection with an even deeper platonic one underlying it; it was the inability to be angry at them, even though I am a bit short-tempered at times and they did things that would make me angry or upset were it someone else; it was a complete devotion and dedication of body and mind; it was an all-consuming warmth.

Love is much, much more than a strong crush. It really is something deeper and longer lasting. Even after my first girlfriend and I broke up--the one from whom I learned the true meaning of the word "love"--it was about six months of her turning a cold shoulder to me and, for the last three or so months of that, having been in a committed/serious relationship with someone else before my feelings for her started to subside, and it was probably another two or three before they had faded to almost nothing.

There's no way to make this sound not corny and not cliche and not a bit arrogant, but love--real love--is something almost ineffable and different for every person. But, you know it when it's there, beyond question. It's the strongest emotion I've ever felt. And it's different for each person and for each time it crops up; love is a unique emotion every time it occurs.

 

[Lilani]

While it's quite heroic of you to go around showing videos to all us cynics, surely i'm entitled to my opinion? I'm not campaigning to turn this thread into a BAWW-fest because that would be as dull as turning this thread into very large piles of sugary-endorphiny goodness. I don't really want convincing that there is love in the world because, well, romantic love isn't really something that interests me. Just sayin'.

Of course you are entitled to your opinion, and I hope I wasn't giving off the impression you weren't. I just wanted to make sure that you were saying those things based on a broad range of experience and perspective. So many "love cynics" on forums like these are just jaded teenagers who have decided that the world is a black, loveless pit filled with only despair and broken hearts just because that cute girl in Jr. High spurned them for the star quarterback.

So I'm not saying people shouldn't be entitled to their opinions. I'm just saying that unless the romantic thing truly isn't your thing, and you know that as a fact about yourself, you shouldn't be so quick to close yourself off from love. Personality traits are one thing, but avoiding something you actually do need out of the fear of rejection is another thing entirely.

 

[Chiiru]

<insert whiny comment about how others around her find "love", but she can't find a decent person to save her life>

Anywhoo. No, I don't. Maybe for other people /emo.

Honestly. Just one of those things I just don't see really happening, but it's true it's different for each person. Person A might experience what they consider love, but that experience for person B could just be a little infatuation/lust. *shrugs*