Escape to the Movies: G.I. Joe - The Rise of Cobra

[Oopsie]

I agree with moviebob completely. The essence of his review as I see it that this is a GI Joe movie. Not some standalone movie someone could go see and enjoy for the story or acting for that matter. If you go see it for what it is, a wonderfully over-the-top action movie and nothing more, it is truely delicious.

For fans of the original series, a wonderful, cgi-encrusted gem.

 

[miraclefilms]

you need to improve your audio recording technique. Maybe try a place with less reflective walls. Maybe a better mic.

 

[DigitalSushi]

I just saw the trailer, great stupidity that I would love to watch, but hell they go and destroy the Eiffel Tower.

Mess with the Eiffel Tower?, screw you hollywood.

 

[Chipperz]

Ok usually Movie Bob is a good reviewer, but now he just lost all credibility that he had and ever will. I'm sorry if I sound like a stupid troll, but how could of call the WORST movie of 2009 better than the last twelve James Bond films. I don't even like James Bond that much, but I understand how they are good films (Besides casino royal that sucked, the original was so much better). Anyone who goes to see The GI Joe movie because of your review are doomed to sit through a piece of crap movie, and their blood will be on your hands Movie Bob I hope you can live with that.

Didn't actually listen to the review, huh?

I'm genuinely surprised by MovieBob's opinions here, 'cos it looks VERY similar to the silliness of Transformers 2. I still think they should have gone with Action Force (International Heroes) rather than G.I. Joe (Real American Hero) because of the whole "global appeal" and "better music", but I'm still psyched to go and see this!

Also, I'm gonna see if I can dig out my old video where the team have to stop C.O.B.R.A. from setting up magical crystals at the "four corners of the Earth" that will stop all technology from working while taking over the Action Force's communication sattelite with shapeshifting space minotaurs. That should get me in the right mindset for it!

 

[TheEnglishman]

I'm not sure of GI Joe.

I watched it yesterday and I'm still humming and harring over my opinion.

I didn't like the fast pacing, with in 10 minutes we're getting this masive epic fight, basically the entire plot, and all character introductions. It meant everything was rushed, unfocused and quite nonsencical, the opening fight scene seemed to be this sudden series of explosions.

I didn't like character development and introduction, chaacters just pop up without any real impact. We see the two main characters and suddenly they're thrust into action and I'm supposed to care. Than suddenly I'm being shown characters have history, why should I care, I've only seen them for a few minutes in the same capacity an extra could fill?

All the actors were phoning it in, Christopher Eccelston's accent was the same sort of accent anyone can put on with little effort. Dennis Quaid displayed two emotions throughout "constipated" and "moderatly happy but still constapated".

The CGI was horrible, and this thing has a bigger budget than Transformers. But maybe that went to the actors who in return phoned it in.

And the masks were simply horrid and ugly and comical in a movie that seems to be trying hard to be serious and cool. I wouldn't say it was schitzophrenic but there are a lot of stuff being blended together.

However I liked the ninja's. Ninja's with guns! The banter and humour was O.K albeit rushed and the action was very good when it wasn't too CGI'd. Zartan was decent albeit underused. And this stuff was a major part of the film so it wasn't too bad.

I want to hate it but I just can't.

 

[reincarN8ed]

Agreed on all counts! I thought to myself "ya know, this movie wouldve been the single greatest thing in the world...if i was 12." Im 19 now and i like my movies with a good amount of action and a great amount of story. G.I.Joe is no perfect movie, but it appeals to the 12-year-old in me. Good guys, bad guys, secret bases, cool gadgets and weapons, NINJAS! If this movie tried to be smart or, God forbid, politically correct it wouldve severely disappointed me. But its not, so it didnt.

It's no Hurt Locker(amazing!) or District 9(going this weekend!), but it's worth $8.

 

[Nerdfury]

I tend to take everything MovieBob says with a generous sackful of salt, but I'll probably go see this regardless. Hopefully it's a lot less Michael Bay so I don't find myself getting headaches.

 

[weirdaljedifan2]

The CGI was horrible, and this thing has a bigger budget than Transformers.

Well, unlike Bay, they spent the amount all around instead of spending most of it on effects.

 

[RTR]

I saw it this Friday and I totally agree. It's just fun for the sake of fun. A movie based on a toy line/cartoon doesn't need to be smart. I'm glad that they didn't overdo it. Thanks, Mr. Sommers.

 

[happysock]

I don't normally listen to this guys reviews, after him having slated transformers and star trek and finding them to be pretty bearable, but i wasn;t sure i wanted to go and see this but now I think I will

 

[theultimateend]

I don't normally listen to this guys reviews, after him having slated transformers and star trek and finding them to be pretty bearable, but i wasn;t sure i wanted to go and see this but now I think I will

I'll agree that Star Trek was good...but seriously. Transformers was little more than a CGI orgy. They could have taken out every last piece of dialogue and ever person and what they had would have been no less enjoyable.

I would love to see a Transformers movie made by people who actually liked transformers. Michael Baye is a douche bag. Star Trek was good because it was made by people who fapped to Star Trek as kids. I respect that kind of directing. I want people who idolize a franchise to try and redo it because they will sweat and freak over the minor details.

Baye turned transformers into a joke...and that's even taking into context the old cartoon and marketing and putting it into modern day America. If you took ANY OF THAT it would be less ridiculous than the bullshit he did.

But yeah, harping on star trek is a pretty difficult thing for me to see justifiable. I mean...it had Nimoy .

 

[sneakypenguin]

How can you blast Transformers then not blast this?! This movie was godforsakenly awful.
2 hours of bad bad acting(it was like watching the command and conquer cut scenes). Horrible plot, nil humor, and don't even get me started on the CGI. This is 2009 not 2002, I mean the CGI polar bear !? Most animation looked like something you would see in a low budget sci fi flick. The only good CGI was in the paris chase scene. This movie didn't "get it" this was horrible. Some crappy romance/history between the good guy and "bad" girl(who didn't see that ending coming)

At least transformers was fun this was just a poorly acted poor CGI fest with random flashbacks to everyones past and lackluster action scenes (other than the paris one).

I think everyones reaction after this movie about sums it up. "well at least district 9 looks good"

 

[Gontear]

Actually, the story is crap. Rather, the way the story is told is crap. Character backgrounds would be scattered sporadically throughout the action and fight scenes would get interrupted by 2-second flashbacks. And if you werent paying attention, you'll go "WTF was that?!"

Also, the lead actor has about as much emotion as a can of tuna.

But as a mindless action movie with lots of cleavage, it's passable.

 

[thimblyjoe]

The last two James Bond movies were masterpieces, showing us that we can have both good action AND good plot in the same movie despite what was previously believed. If you think a shitty action film with no plot can beat those films you are sadly mistaken. I'm not saying it's not good, but I can tell you without having seen GI Joe, that they aren't even shooting for the level of awesome that was achieved by the last two bond films.

 

[DaxStrife]

Hmm, maybe I'll actually see this now when it hits the cheap-seats, if nothing else but to see that kid from "3rd Rock From the Sun" try to pull off Cobra Commander.
Oh, and a quibble with the video: images and posters kept getting too blurry too quickly; it actually made my eyes hurt a few times, and I'm a guy who stares at computer screens all day.

 

[C4BL3]

This movie BLOWs. How can any selfloving person think this movie would be fun. As a kid never did Duke and the Baroness fall in love. How is the Dr. Cobra Comander. You take out two main Cobras. The only good part about this movie was Snake Eyes oh and Zartan was spot on. This movie was junk. the flashbacks were sooo sad. who needed that. the love stories were not needed. Never I mean never did my G.I. Joes fall in love. Sad.

 

[Slycne]

The last two James Bond movies were masterpieces, showing us that we can have both good action AND good plot in the same movie despite what was previously believed. If you think a shitty action film with no plot can beat those films you are sadly mistaken. I'm not saying it's not good, but I can tell you without having seen GI Joe, that they aren't even shooting for the level of awesome that was achieved by the last two bond films.

Ok usually Movie Bob is a good reviewer, but now he just lost all credibility that he had and ever will. I'm sorry if I sound like a stupid troll, but how could of call the WORST movie of 2009 better than the last twelve James Bond films. I don't even like James Bond that much, but I understand how they are good films (Besides casino royal that sucked, the original was so much better). Anyone who goes to see The GI Joe movie because of your review are doomed to sit through a piece of crap movie, and their blood will be on your hands Movie Bob I hope you can live with that.

Listen to the review again

Only thing that gets me is Movie Bob saying G.I. Joe is better than the last 12 James Bond Movies.

Just to be clear: I didn't say it was better than the last 12 James Bond movies, I said it was a better James Bond movie than the last 12 James Bond movies A bit overly-cute, I realize.

What I'm aiming at is... of course "Casino Royale" is a better movie than this ("Quantum of Solace" isn't, though) but this is a better approximation of what I think of when I think "James Bond movie" - i.e. the otherworldly supervillians looking to conquer the world, hopping all over the globe, the giant city-sized underwater bases bad guys just happen to have, the crazy gadgets, etc. And the "actual" James Bond movies stopped being good at that stuff after "The Spy Who Loved Me."

 

[daedrick]

maaaaaan, the quality of the video itself is so BAD. Its insane, the screen get distortionned (sp?) so freaking badly its hard to read or even see wtf is on the screen... am I alone?

 

[fasteddie_felson]

Movie Bob, God bless him and his really poor taste in movies: 1. that it's better then the last 12 Bond Flicks? Not even the worst Roger Moore Bond like Moonraker. We've recently had Casino Royale, and in the 90's Golden Eye. 2. That it's not a flaccid movie cash in. Yes, yes it is a crappy movie cash in.

If I was 8 I'd like it, but even a 12 year old after seeing their dad's collection of great action flicks can recognize how thin G.I. Joe is. what a piece of crap. I listened to Bob's review, and said well he said it's "Fun" so I went to see it. This is the last time I'll ever take Bob's advice. He was dead wrong on Star Trek, and damn sure wrong on this movie.

 

[300lb. Samoan]

ok bob, I might just go see this. I was completely convinced this was going to be a shitfest of a film, especially after seeing how awful the transformers sequel was I wasn't ready to believe in toy movies. If it's good, I'll buy you a beer next time I'm in NY.