Monkey Paw thread

[Neuromancer]

You are happy.

But you are not interesting.


I wish I was interesting.

 

[SupahEwok]

You are teleported to a Holocaust camp, where your life becomes part of one of the most widespread historical narratives in history. Alas, your life is neither long nor pleasant.

I wish for the following to be real:
When you wish upon a star
Makes no difference who you are
Anything your heart desires
Will come to you
If your heart is in your dream
No request is too extreme
When you wish upon a star
As dreamers do
Fate is kind
She brings to those to love
The sweet fulfillment of
Their secret longing
Like a bolt out of the blue
Fate steps in and sees you through
When you wish upon a star
Your dreams come true

 

[Mister Mumbler]

Granted, but as you are not the copyright holder to that song you are sued into oblivion.

I wish we could set up and run a forum tabletop RPG campaign.

 

[Kae]

Done! But I'm the GM and I lose interest after 2 weeks leaving everybody down in addition to being a very poor GM.
I actually did try to set up a forum RPG campaign but back when I had no GM-ing experience and I freaked out and disappeared from the forums for months because I thought I would suck.

I wish I had the confidence to just do things.

 

[Neuromancer]

You are now suicidally overconfident in your ability to do things.

I wish Forum Games were placed under Current Events.

 

[Shadyside]

Forum games become political and loses its fun.

I wish the rioters also targeted and destroyed the headquarters of CNN, MSNBC, and Fox News.

 

[Mister Mumbler]

Forum games become political and loses its fun.

I wish the rioters also targeted and destroyed the headquarters of CNN, MSNBC, and Fox News.

Done, but unfortunately the only cable news TV left is OANN.

I wish to shake of this general feeling of malaise

 

[Kae]

Done, you don't feel anything anymore though,

I wish I knew what all words mean so I don't have to google them.

 

[Shadyside]

Google then proceeds to harvest your brain for their search engine.

I wish the world was just as honest, politically incorrect, and hilarious as the cast from It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia.

 

[CM156]

You get addicted to crack cocaine.

I wish Trump would concede the election.

 

[Shadyside]

He concedes, but he wins on 2024 and plunges the western world into pure chaos.

I wish the Democrats would actually let an actual progressive candidate be the nominee and win the presidency.

 

[deleted20220709]

DELETED

 

[Shadyside]

You get immunity, but everyone who took a covid vaccine dies which gives fuel to anti vaxxers.

I wish people would refer to covid as Chinese virus, Wuhan virus, or kung flu.

 

[Tireseas]

They start to use the racist messaging, so China just decides to take over the world just to make everywhere China. Life under the totalitarianism of Xi Jingping is brutal for most white Americans, but surprisingly tolerable for the rest of us...

I wish we had FTL space travel at an economic cost.

 

[Shadyside]

That will lead humanity to the events of the Mass Effect series.

I wish Canada was a superpower.

 

[CM156]

Canada becomes a superpower by becoming a fascist absolute monarchy and absorbing every country in the Americas down to Panama.

I wish Argentina didn't exist anymore.

 

[Shadyside]

Latin America is even more destabilized for centuries to come.

I wish America would descend into a 2nd civil war.

 

[CM156]

The second civil war is between Kirk supporters and Picard supporters.

I wish that all countries could enjoy liberal democracy and the rule of law.

 

[Shadyside]

Soon the people realize that democracy doesn't work and vote in more Donald Trump like candidates.

I wish all girls would get daddy issues.

 

[CM156]

All the boys get mommy issues, too.

I wish I were elected president of the United States so I could use my pardon power to free all those who are unjustly imprisoned.