Poll: You can have sex with the celebrity of your choice but they'll tell the world of your performance.

Goofguy

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Nov 25, 2010
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I'd probably have to go for Jenna Fischer. That smile gets me every time. And she seems to be a sweet, classy lady so I don't think she would make a big deal out of it when she announces my sexual prowess to the world.
 

Terminate421

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Jul 21, 2010
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Marry Elizabeth Winstead



Because if I would fuck anyone, it'd be someone who is hot as the sun AND obscure.
 

thesilentman

What this
Jun 14, 2012
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*Reads thread title*

Oh well. If it was anonymous, I would have considered it, but no. I'm perfectly fine masterbating to porn by myself.

And I can't find any celebrity sexy for some reason. I look at my girlfriend and yep, I'm stoned. Celebities? I care none whatsoever.
 

NinjaDeathSlap

Leaf on the wind
Feb 20, 2011
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Evil Smurf said:
Celebrity or porn star?
<spoiler=Celebrity>
Rose McGowan
http://img.ibtimes.com/www/data/images/full/2011/08/12/145975-cast-member-rose-mcgowan-arrives-at-the-film-premiere-of-conan-the-bar.jpg<spoiler=Porn Star>Feye Reaganhttp://beststarphoto.com/images/faye-reagan-01.jpg

FYI: I am pretty good in bed.
You see, you list the first one as the 'celebrity'. However, I'm pretty sure your second choice is more widely (as well as far more, erm, intimately) known that your first. ;)

OT: Yes, I would do this. I am a single male on Valentine's Day. In my current state you could give me a far more taxing hypothetical dilemma and 'doesn't matter had sex' would apply. It's just a matter of who...

I think I'm going to go with Freida Pinto.


Don't even try to tell me you wouldn't!

As for the public evaluation, do you really think I'd take up the offer to sleep with Freida Pinto just so I could screw it up? I'd fucking train for that weekend, with Rocky-esque montages and everything!
 

Evil Smurf

Admin of Catoholics Anonymous
Nov 11, 2011
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DVS BSTrD said:
Funny I remember her being paler

then a lot redder >)
I'll need to do some independent research and get back to you on that.

http://images.wikia.com/adventuretimewithfinnandjake/images/3/3b/If_you_know_what_I_mean_meme_lol.png
 

saxist01

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Jun 4, 2009
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They can talk about my second time with them. That first one is just a warm-up. (Voted Other)
 

wintercoat

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Nov 26, 2011
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No. Being that I'm:

A) a social recluse,
B) very shy and timid around attractive women,
C) socially awkward around everyone,
D) a virgin who is scared to death of being inadequate, and
E) suffer from severe low self esteem issues,

I doubt I'd even be able to perform, what with all the blood in my body suddenly finding itself in my cheeks, creating a beacon of awkward embarrassment so bright I could fill in for Rudolf, let alone perform badly.

Even if I do perform well enough, the sudden increase in attention would drive me insane. I hate attention. It makes me physically ill. Large amounts of attention makes me paranoid and mentally unstable. I lash out at the people giving me attention.

To all those saying "doesn't matter, had sex"; yes, yes it does matter, especially if it could make your life miserable afterwards.
 

Celtois

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Mar 28, 2009
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Voted no, because I'm one of those delightfully old fashioned individuals who refuses to have sex before marriage.
 

Vegosiux

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May 18, 2011
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MegaManOfNumbers said:
Well this ain't fair! Girls don't have a performance limit!
Of course they can have one. Ever had one of those "lie back and let the guy do all the work" ladies? Believe you me, it's not fun.
 

Yopaz

Sarcastic overlord
Jun 3, 2009
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Sure, even if I did a terrible job I would still be someone who had sex with someone famous and that's what they'll care about, not the actual performance. Basically I would get laid with a person I choose then get laid plenty more.

I see no downside to this.
 

Canadamus Prime

Robot in Disguise
Jun 17, 2009
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wintercoat said:
No. Being that I'm:

A) a social recluse,
B) very shy and timid around attractive women,
C) socially awkward around everyone,
D) a virgin who is scared to death of being inadequate, and
E) suffer from severe low self esteem issues,
This and
F) can't think of a celebrity I'd want to only have sex with
 

Pedro The Hutt

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Apr 1, 2009
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I'd pass.

I'm more of a "sex is something between two people" kind. If I wanted the world to know how my sex was I'd at least tape the damn event so that there'd be objective evidence if my performance is to be judged and broadcast.

So yeah, no, if the catch is everyone'd know every damn thing that happened and what she thought of it, I'd pass.
 

MegaManOfNumbers

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Mar 3, 2010
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Vegosiux said:
MegaManOfNumbers said:
Well this ain't fair! Girls don't have a performance limit!
Of course they can have one. Ever had one of those "lie back and let the guy do all the work" ladies? Believe you me, it's not fun.
But wai- I, hold on....

Are you affirming or denying my claim?
 

JochemHippie

Trippin' balls man.
Jan 9, 2012
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Emma Watson ofcourse, partially because I can say I banged Hermione.
And she looks amazing.

Not too worried about my performance, I've never disappointed so far. Heck, they come back for more ;D
 

MetalMagpie

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Jun 13, 2011
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Nah. I'd be really embarrassed by someone describing what I'm like in bed, even if they said I was good! And there aren't any celebrities I want to sleep with that badly.
 

RhombusHatesYou

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Mar 21, 2010
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Vegosiux said:
MegaManOfNumbers said:
Well this ain't fair! Girls don't have a performance limit!
Of course they can have one. Ever had one of those "lie back and let the guy do all the work" ladies? Believe you me, it's not fun.
Colloquially known in parts of Oz as Starfish.
 

Eddie the head

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Feb 22, 2012
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No, for the same reason I don't want to have a one night stand with anyone. This person is just as much a stranger and I don't want to do anything like that with someone I don't know.
 

Casual Shinji

Should've gone before we left.
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Apr 4, 2020
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I'm afraid I'd have to say no.

In my head I'd jump on that shit in a nanosecond, but in actuality I'd probably be stopped stone cold by the awkwardness of the situation. Also, being totally inexperienced in the act of love making, it would feel like climbing Everest with zero moutaineering skills.

And celebrities that I find attractive are just a fantasy figure, not representitive of how they are in real life. I got a big ol' crush on Alison Brie, but who's to say she's not kind of a ***** when I meet her. I like my attractive celebrities where they belong; On screen.
 

Angie7F

WiseGurl
Nov 11, 2011
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Yes, but after a few drinks because it would be more fun that way.
Performance wise, I guess being female take a lot of pressure off of me.